Drunken SeaHorse GrimmIchi WIP
by SLYSWN
Summary: Summary: It's not every day you receive an invitation to your former rival's coming out party. New intermission chapter 12/27/13: Ichigo innner mind rambling Ha! Prancing! Him! Sure I've joked/jibed that he's like a jungle cat-specifically a panther but prancing? Not likely!
1. PROLOGUE

**Disclaimer: If I owned BLEACH there would be no need for a disclaimer in the first place.**

A/N So here we have a five chapter GrimmIchi, some parts may seem cliché but hopefully the entertainment factor will make up for it.

Warnings: AU, OOC, GrimmIchi, others, language, grammar, punctuation, non-beta-ed, switching views, WIP, and the usual stuff that one can expect when they come to read my stories.

Dedication and inspiration come from AneKuro and her sparkle posse.

Summary: _It's not every day you receive an invitation to your former rival's coming out party._

_**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**_

_**Prologue**_

_Electric blue eyes watched from the distance as the orange haired male dressed in the navy blue graduation gown shared a group hug with his friends before putting a perfectly tanned and toned arm around his girlfriend and setting off into the sunset on a borrowed moped. _

_It was a lot like a seriously bad and cliché teen flick, the only thing missing were the chirping birds and the not-so-angelic choir._

_Grimmjow __Jeagerjaques let out a snort as his rival disappeared from his view for-well not forever but a long time._

_()()()_

_And when the name 'Kurosaki' next rolled off Grimmjow's lips it was in the middle of a particularly harsh rainstorm._

_With slippery fingers, he lifts the lid on the mailbox open and discovers a sparkly pink invitation to his former rival's coming out party._

_Suddenly the fact the he's drenched like a half drowned cat doesn't matter so much anymore._

_TBC_

_Bottom Note: Of course it stinks, its just a prologue._

_Thank you for reading!_


	2. Chapter ONE

Disclaimer: I'm not only KUBO-sensei I also own the entire SJ franchise. That's means I'm on top of the manga world...Isn't nice to dream isn't it? Snorts. As always I do not own a freakin' thing.

A/N Everyone has their own inner DIVA even the manliest of men. Believe me I know because my gay guy pals never ever let me forget it. That being said Grimmjwow will always be SEME and Ichigo will always be UKE.

**THIS IS JUST THE WAY SLY DOES THINGS. IF YOU DID NOT LIKE IT THEN KINDLY SHOW YOURSELF TO THE EXIT. ALSO PLEASE NOTE THAT THE ONLY LANGUAGE I KNOW IS ENGLISH, SADLY I DON'T KNOW FRENCH OR JAPANESE. SO JUST LET YOUR IMAGINATIONS CARRY YOU AWAY….**

Warnings: AU, OOC, GrimmIchi, past OthersIchi, past OthersGrimm, one-sided OthersIchi, one-sided OthersGrimm.

Side pairings mentioned: ShiroxUlquoirra, others, language, grammar, punctuation, non-beta-ed, switching views, flash backs, dialogue, WIP, and the usual stuff that one can expect when they come to read my stories.

Dedication and inspiration come from AneKuro and her sparkle posse.

Summary: It's not every day you receive an invitation to your former rival's coming out party.

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

CHAPTER ONE

_In order to move towards the party we have to go back to where it all began…_

1 week ago…

(Ichigo)

Kurosaki Ichigo is about to make a very important phone call to one very important person.

This person is his cousin, one Shiba Shiro. Despite being only a few months apart in age, Shiro enjoys teasing Ichigo at every turn.

So one might wonder why they are so close. And the answer is this: Both Ichigo and Shiro have always believed that they were separated at birth and rather than being cousins they are actually twin brothers.

_Ichigo at age 6_

_"Shiro really is my twin isn't he Kaa-san?"_

_Perfectly manicured fingers lightly pat unruly bright orange hair. "I know you feel close to your cousin Ichigo but I can assure you with every fiber of my being that you are not twins."_

_"But he has to be. Our bone structure is practically identical and his hands, come on Kaa-san no one else in the family has hands like mine except for Shiro."_

_"Your uncle Kaien-_

_"Is my real father isn't he? I've always thought-I mean there's no way goat face could be-_

_"No Ichigo, Kaien is my brother and siblings do not have that kind of relationship."_

_Bottom lip quivering "B-but-_

_"And besides you already have a twin brother, Kon."_

_A groan. "Kon is not my twin. He's some freakish alien from some creepy planet who managed to steal my hair and nose."_

_"Your nose? Oh honestly Ichigo where do you come up with these ideas?"_

_"He did. I know he did!"_

_"No he did not Ichigo and need I remind you that Kon is two inches shorter than you and that his hair color more closely resembles my own."_

_"But I'm your REAL son he's just-_

_"You sound ridiculous Ichigo. Kon and you are both my sons." Hands patted a round belly "Just as Karin and Yuzu will both be my daughters."_

_Ichigo at age 9_

_"But I don't want to be to be twins with Kon, he's such a-he's gross-I caught him sniffing Tatsuki's shorts the other day."_

_"Oh Ichigo don't make up such stories."_

_"I'm not. He really was sniffing her shorts and then he put them on top of his head and-_

_"That's enough." A warm smile "It's time to go greet the new neighbors."_

_"But Kaa-san I'm trying to talk to you here." Small hands tugged on the woman's long skirt._

_"We can talk later."_

()()()

Ichigo snorted at the memories.

"God I was such an annoying little brat back then."

Finally on the third ring, Shiro picked up.

"What's the matter King? Miss me already even though it's only been 24 hours?"

"Why must you always call me King?"

"Because ya are much too pretty to be a Queen."

"Damn you I'm not pretty!"

He could hear Shiro snickering on the other end. "Yes ya are, too pretty for your own good really. Luckily you have a prized stallion like me in your corner or your precious behind would be in serious trouble."

"What are you talking about Shiro?"

"Don't play dumb with me King. I know why ya called and all I can say is: It's about damn time you came out of the closet!"

"Wha-how did you?"

Shiro let out a mad cackle "I know everything King or do ya not remember how my brain works?"

Shiro has always had what could be best termed as a physic ability, many times while growing up and here in the present, the male with powdered white hair could tell what Ichigo was thinking simply by tuning into his emotions or something.

It was a bit annoying but-

"So any thought on who ya gonna hook up with first?"

"What are you talking about?"

Another snicker. "You are so incredibly thick sometimes King. I'm talking about sealing the deal, making it official. I mean ya don't really plan to put your ass out there and do nothin' with it do ya?"

"Are you suggesting that I-?"

"I could give you a few pointers if ya like Ichigo."

Ichigo could hear the purr in his cousin's voice. The fact that he was using his actual named proved how serious he was.

"Shiro!"

"What? All I'm sayin' is been there, done that. Ulquiorra won't mind, he knows that he's always been a stand in cuz I couldn't have ya."

"Stop!"

"Turning bit red eh King? Feelin' a certain special heat comin' from down south? Why don't ya take it out and play with it for aw-

"What the hell is wrong with you? Can't you ever just talk to me norma-?"

"Brothers share everythin' anyway so what's the harm in a lil'-

Ichigo let out a groan.

And Shiro just continued on…

"So anyway let me tell you about this corporate exec I met the other day. One lick and I brought the bastard to his knees-course the he retaliated by-

"You cheated on Ulquiorra?"

"It's not considered cheating if we have an open relationship, sides I refuse to bottom for him."

"You won't bottom for your lover but you'll bottom for some random silver daddy?"

"Number one) the guy is like in his late 30's and doesn't have a single strand of silver hair anywhere on him believe me I checked. Number two) I told you it was an open relationship. Number three) No actual fucking occurred!"

"So you just what serviced each other and then went home to Ulquoirra?"

"Got it in one King. Seems like your self-acceptance has further increased your knowledge on the pleasures of man. Gotta say I'm pretty proud of ya!"

If his cousin were in the room with him right now Ichigo would punch him. HARD.

"So when was the big moment?"

"Moment?"

"I'm talking about when ya finally decided to come to terms with whom you've always been."

"Oh that well-

Ichigo felt his cheeks flush again. "Promise you won't laugh?"

Shiro snorted. "Even if I do laugh I'll be laughing with ya, not at ya."

"Shiro!"

"Fine, fine no laughing, now tell me."

Ichigo cleared his throat and then began his story…

"Well as you know I've been dating Cirucci for awhile and-

()()()

**FLASHBACK**

_A young woman with long purple hair, matching purple eyes and flawless ivory skin kicked off her matching heels and climbed on to the bed._

_The tiny black mini dress she was wearing rose even higher as she shamelessly spread her legs and showed of her crotch-less panties._

_The average guy would probably be in fuckin' paradise at that moment, watching their sexy girlfriend with heavy lidded eyes and salivating at the mouth._

_Much as Ichigo liked to tell himself that he was just like the average guy, the more he was realizing that he was quite the opposite._

_He could barely stand to look at Cirucci's perfectly waxed and glistening-he couldn't even bring himself to say the word in his head with out turning a sickly shade of green._

_He tried to ignore the young woman's exposed treasures and just focus on her face (since he had always found the human face to be fascinating) but-_

_"Ichigo, why don't you come and sit down next to me?" she patted the bed._

_Wide cinnamon and coffee colored eyes met lustful lavender and amethyst._

_And instead of growing hard, Ichigo felt like his balls were shrinking and like his dick was trying to crawl back inside his body._

_He looked away from Cirucci's face and over at the wall._

_Cirucci giggled. "Always such a shy boy."_

_He heard the sound of the bed creak and then next thing he knew, she was at his side and her hands were creeping up under his shirt. He shivered (not because he was turned on but rather because he felt like he was being violated!) and she misinterpreted his reaction to be a positive one. "Yes I know what you need Ichigo," her voice was a purr now._

_He stilled her hands and brushed a stray lock of hair away from her eyes. "Let's uh-let's not rush this Cirucci."_

_The young woman scrunched up her nose. "Rush my ass? We've been together for a year now and a woman has needs."_

_"We I just-I'm not ready for uh you know sex."_

_Cirucci crossed her arms and glared at him "Your seeing another woman aren't you? That slut from the Yoga studio or whatever-_

_"What? No I would never cheat on you."_

_The woman's features softened once more as she drew her body closer to his and grabbed Ichigo's hand, placing it on her inner thigh, "You love me don't you?"_

_Ichigo blinked. Love? He cared a great deal about Circucci but he didn't lo-_

_"Touch me right here!" She moved his hand to her crotch._

_This time Ichigo was the one to scrunch up his own nose. It felt wet and just-_

_"Ew!"_

_Okay that was so totally unmanly but it felt so slimy and the smell was just-_

_"Ew?" Cirucci's eyes turned cold. She pulled down her skirt and then snarled up at him, "You bast-no you don't even deserve that term-you spineless dickless-_

_She shoved him into the dresser and then stormed out of his room but not before adding "I always knew there was something WRONG with you and now I know," a sneer "You're nothing more than a spineless dick-less fairy!"_

**FLASHBACK END**

"That's harsh King," a pause "Want me to go kill her?"

It was a tempting offer but-

"No. I don't want you to kill anyone."

"Damn I was gonna have such a blast doin' it too."

"Forget about. It's in the past now."

A sigh. "Fine, fine. Let's-I know now that you've admitted to being a proud fairy you should dress like one because really King wearing jeans every day and night, 365 days outta the year so doesn't cut it."

"I'm not changing my style just because-

"Yes you are. I'll be over with in the hour. I'll bring Ulquiorra too. He's gonna love to hear this."

"What? No don't-I mean I don't want anyone else to-

"King, don't be stupid, everyone has to know."

A sigh. "I know but look can't you just wait until I tell my family first."

"Haven't told ma, pa and the lil sisters yet?"

"No I uh wanted to tell-

"I'm flattered King. Really truly flattered. Now hurry ya ass up and go tell em cuz like I said Quiorra and I will be by with in the hour."

"But I-how am I-what if they?"

"Look King if you're worried that they won't love you as much any more, its just nerves. Trust me you'll feel much better when ya tell them."

()()()

His family is sitting at the breakfast table when Ichigo finally gets up the courage to come downstairs.

"Morning Ichigo!"

The orange haired male dodged the oncoming flying kick and ignored the sound of the moronic goat crashing into the wall.

He walks over to his mother and greets her with a kiss on the cheek and a small smile. "Morning Kaa-san."

"Good morning Ichigo. Did you sleep well?"

"I slept alright I guess but uh look um I have something I want to say."

This was ridiculous…he was almost 21 and he was stumbling over his words?

Honeycomb brown eyes turned serious "What's wrong Ichigo?"

He could hear Karin snort into her cereal bowl.

"Um nothing is wrong exactly."

He pulled out the empty chair placed in between Yuzu (who was chewing on toast) and Kon (who had fallen asleep on top of his pancakes) and sat down.

"Yes Ichigo?"

"I uh well I'm gay."

He heard Karin snort again "I could've told you that."

"Shh! Karin let him speak."

Another snort.

Yuzu, who hadn't said a word up until then shushed her twin and then turned to her older brother "Go ahead onii-chan."

"Thanks Yuzu."

The teenage girls' eyes sparkled "Anytime Onii-chan."

Karin yawned "So he's gay so what?"

"Karin!"

"What?"

"Honestly Karin, haven't you ever heard of-

"Look I don't see what the big deal is or how this is some kinda major discovery. I knew Ichi-nii was gay back when I was in the crib with Yuzu."

"What? Ichigo isn't gay! Why on earth would you say something like that Karin? Are you trying to give your dear father a-

Karin rolled her eyes.

"Oh Isshin honestly, come up off the floor already and sit down. Ichigo is counting on us to support him as he moves forward to explore this side of himself."

"But honey-bun, if Ichigo is gay then who is going to carry on the family line?"

"Don't be ridiculous Isshin, we have 3 other children."

"Ha ha your right! Alright son if you want to be a sparkle fairy then daddy accepts just so long as you keep the porn in a safe or somethi-ouch! Karin why would you hur-Ouch!"

"Shut up goat face!" Karin turned her attention to Ichigo "So what would you like us to do Ichi-nii? Yuzu and I could call some of our friends and see if some of their older brothers might-

This was too fast. Much too fast. Ichigo was glad that his family was taking his announcement well but-

"Uh no Karin I'm not ready for a-

"Nonsense. A few dates aren't nearly enough!"

Oh no goat face was getting that look in his eyes again-the kind of look where he would-

"Karin, Yuzu, Masaki, my love cancel all appointments and trips because we are going to throw a party."

"A PARTY?" Kon finally woke up "WHERE'S THE PARTY? KON-SAMA IS THE LIFE OF ALL PARTIES. WHERE THERE IS A PARTY I WILL BE THERE!"

Ichigo knocked his twin over the head with his fist. "Not so loud you idiot. We're all in the same room."

Kon grumbled something unintelligible and then started shoving food into his mouth.

Ichigo felt a smaller hand on top of his own. "Yeah Yuzu?"

"Are you-will this make you happier onii-chan?"

Ichigo couldn't answer that. It was much to soon "Well I'll see how it g-

"Of course it makes him happier Yuzu. I mean just think for years and years Ichigo has hidden his true self, fearing for what others might say or do to him if they knew the truth. Oh my son, daddy will always be here for you."

The man came over to Ichigo just then and pulled him into a bear-crushing hug. "We'll have to go over the rules of course and I think you'd better make an appointment with Ryuuken too. Prostate cancer is a very serious thing you know and-

Ichigo really hated goat face at times.

"Isshin!"

"What? Oh Masaki my love isn't it great? We have a gay son now!"

"Isshin I know Ichigo appreciates your support on this but you're going a little over-

"Nonsense. Yuzu, Karin when you're through with your breakfast head up stairs to your brothers room and find his old list of contact numbers. Masaki, my love, can you call Kisuke and Haineko and tell them to book reservations for oh a party of 300 at the 'Drunken SeaHorse'. Kon, you're coming with me. If we're going to present Ichigo to the world, then he's going to need a few things."

Ichigo did not like the sound of any of this. Once just once he wished his father were normal.

He sent his mother a pleading look "Kaa-san please do something."

"Don't worry Ichigo. Even if your father does go overboard I promise I won't let anything bad or embarrassing happen to you."

"Ha ha ha," Isshin was still on a role "This is going to be the single greatest coming out party in history. Quick question Ichigo: Boas or Scarves?"

Ichigo decided to tune goat face out and just eat his break fast.

()()

2 hours later…

"Onii-chan, are you busy?"

"Busy? Nah, I always have time for you Yuzu."

Ichigo was out in his backyard absentmindedly strumming cords on his guitar. He patted the empty spot on the bench next to him.

Yuzu came over and sat down. "Karin-chan and I were wondering something, regarding the invitations."

"Yeah?"

"Um you know that one guy who originally moved here from Canada?"

"You mean Grimmjow?"

Ichigo hadn't thought about his former blue haired rival in quite a few years.

"Uh huh that's the one."

"What about him?"

Yuzu bit her bottom lip. "Well Karin-chan found your Senior Year book and his address was inside."

"Uh okay is there a point to-?"

Ichigo couldn't recall even signing yearbooks, least of all trading and signing with Grimmjow.

"There was also a lock of electric blue hair attached to it." Yuzu added.

Okay that was a little er disturbing?

"Are you trying to tell me that you and Karin are thinking of contacting that guy?"

Ichigo wasn't sure how he felt about that.

"Well actually Karin-chan already left and she's on her way to the post office now."

"What?"

"Oh please don't be angry onii-chan. I mean Grimmjow-san is probably all grown up by now."

"But Yuzu its only been about 4 and a half years-that guy-there's no way he could've-

"Onii-chan it's not like you told a grudge."

"I know that Yuzu but you don't get it that guy he-

"What onii-chan?"

Ichigo shook his head. There was no way he could tell his younger sister about the history between him and Grimmjow. No way he could tell her about the too close encounters, the almost kiss, the-

"Onii-chan?"

"Yeah Yuzu?"

"Is the reason you-do you think you might have feelings for Grimmjow-san and that's why you're feeling nervous?"

Feelings for his rival? Oh Ichigo really rather not think about they way his heart would pound back then-he'd really rather not think about the way his-

"You do have feelings for him don't you onii-chan?"

"What?" Ichigo's voice cracked "Uh of course not Yuzu-why would I-

"This will be the perfect opportunity to-

"Yuzu uh-no I mean-that guy he doesn't uh-I don't think he's-he moved yeah, back to his homeland and-

"So? Chado is visiting his home land and he's still flying in for the party."

"You called Chado?"

"Mm hmm or rather Ishida-san did. I ran into him yesterday, he was glowing like a pregnant woman."

Um okay the idea of a pregnant Ishida was too disturbing to even-

"Onii-chan?"

"Yeah Yuzu?"

"If Grimmjow-san returns your feelings does that mean you're moving out?"

"What?"

"It's okay. So long as you promise to visit us once a month."

"Woah, woah slow down Yuzu I'm not moving out and even if I was it wouldn't be with that guy. I mean Grimmjow isn't even or rather he is but-uh yeah like I said I don't think he even lives around here anymore and-

Ichigo shook his head. "Look Yuzu if I promise to attend this party, will you and Karin promise not to do anything to embarrass me?"

"Why would I do something like that onii-chan? I'm just happy for you." A smile "And I really do hope things work out with you and Grimmjow-san because he's pretty _hot_!"

"Yuzu!"

The teen girl giggled. "What? I'm not saying I'm not happy with Hana-kun but Grimmjow-san is-

"Aright stop you're starting to sound like Shiro or something."

"No I'm not. I'm just pointing out that my older brother has good taste."

"Get lost squirt, I need to talk to King."

"Shiro!" Yuzu jumped off the bench and ran over to hug her powdered cousin. "Why didn't you tell us that you were coming I would've baked you s-

"You can bake something for me later squirt. Right now King and I have to go on a little shopping trip."

()()()

Ulquiorra Shiffer, a seriously weird individual. Skin so pale, eyes so green, forever unblinking, voice monotone.

"If you'd like lessons on how to properly use a vibrator I can help you out with that Kurosaki."

And totally and completely uncensored.

"Uh thanks Ulquiorra but I uh don't think I'll be using a well-something like that anytime soon."

Green eyes stayed fixed on his face. "It's perfectly natural to be nervous the first time around. You just have to remember to relax your body and-

"Stop! Please just-!"

Ulquiorra cocked his head to the side. "But Shiro said you had finally come to terms with your true self and-

Ichigo covered his ears and started singing at a loud obnoxious level.

It didn't help though-he could still hear Ulquiorra.

"You start out small and then gradually work your way up to the larger ones-

"Stop!" Ichigo kicked the front seat and Ulquiorra went flying forward into the windshield.

Not even this stopped him-the small trickle of blood running down the older man's brow didn't even seem to faze him.

"Anal beads can be fun too but be sure you have a-

"Shiro hurry the fuck up and get back in the car already!"

The powdered young man had stepped out of the car in the middle of traffic in order to talk to an older man with coiffed hair and shiny shoes. Ichigo wondered absentmindedly if this man was the executive that Shiro mentioned to him earlier that same morning.

"Once you've got the basics down you can move on to more exciting things like costume play, s and m and-

"Shiro!"

()()()

"Alright now King first rule: Having sexy legs like yours, you should show em' off. Try this on."

They were standing in front of the dressing room. Ulquiorra had run over to the yogurt stand in the mall while Shiro went out of his way to pick the most embarrassing not to mention unmanly ensembles in the store. And he expected Ichigo to try on each and every one of them.

At the moment the orange haired male had a white tank top and a bright orange mini-skirt with a slit down each side in his hands. He wanted to throw it back at Shiro's head but instead he let out a resigned sigh and stepped inside the dressing room.

"This is the last one. After this we're leaving."

"Don't be stupid King. We can't leave until we get you a padded bra."

"Hell no! I'm not wearing a fucking bra Shiro, panties is one thing b-

"Panties huh?" He could hear the smirk even though he couldn't see it "Be right back."

()()()

In the end Shiro and Ulquiorra had forced Ichigo to buy 3 tank tops, 3 skirts and four pairs of silky and satin panties.

"Now then what should we do with your hair?"

"Forget it! You are not touching my hair."

"Fine a wig then. Ulquiorra knows a guy who can give you a pricey wig for half the price."

"I don't want a fuckin wig! I'm not a drag queen damn you! I just-

"There's no harm in cross-dressing every now and then Kurosaki."

"That's right King." Shiro grinned. "Plus it's so damn fun to mess with the minds of straight men."

Ulquiorra turned to Shiro and the couple shared a grin.

"That last one wasn't so straight after we were done with him."

Ichigo wanted to run-far far away.

"Alright time for waxing and anal bleaching!"

"WHAT?"

()()()

Several hours later…

"Now remember King you might be a little sensitive for awhile so my advice is to soak in a nice warm bath and then slip into some comfy pajamas or something."

"I'm going to kill both you and Ulquiorra!"

Shiro grinned. "No you're gonna thank us." A powder white hand reached out and slapped Ichigo's ass just then.

Ichigo let out a scream.

()()()

"Back already onii-chan?"

"Ichi-nii, are you alright?"

Karin and Yuzu were in the living room watching a movie when Ichigo entered the doorway with several bags and a noticeable wince.

"I'm fine. Just a little uh tiered." He gave his sisters a small smile and then headed upstairs.

()()()

Ichigo threw down his shopping bags and collapsed on top of his bed.

He closed his eyes and let his mind drift into the past-specifically the very first encounter with his former rival.

()()()

**FLASH BACK**

**1****st**** year**

_**Ah Freshman Orientation…**_

_The time of reconnecting with friends from grade school and meeting new faces or at least that's what Ichigo would be doing it he wasn't currently in the middle of a well to call it a brawl was an exaggeration-it was more of scuffle-a street scuffle._

It was stupid the way it started really…

()()()

_On the way to school the orange haired youth stopped into a toy store in order to pick up a plushie. Not just any plushie but the ultra deluxe limited edition red eyed Yagami plushie, a character from a manga/series and Ichigo just had to have it.'_

_But then this redheaded gorilla shoved him to the side and-_

_"No way man, this is mine. I've been saving up since last Christmas and-_

_Ichigo got to his feet and grabbed the red gorilla by the collar of his shirt. "The hell it is, its mine!"_

_"Boys! If you're going to do that, take it outside!"_

_()()()_

_Right swing. Duck. Left Swing._

_"Listen I saw it first. So its mine."_

_Punch. Punch. Jab. Block._

_"In your dreams berry-face, its hey!"_

_"What?"_

_Orange brows furrowed in confusion._

_The red head had stopped blocking his punches and his attention was elsewhere._

_Ichigo followed the gorilla's gaze and found a blue haired kid in a leather jacket walking out the door with HIS plushie._

_"Bastard."_

_"I know he has a leather jacket man, a real leather-hey where you-!_

_Ichigo didn't bother explaining. The blue haired plushie snatcher was already at the corner._

_He took off after him._

_()()()_

_The kid was seriously fast._

_'He could probably rival Rukia's older brother on the track field and-Wait! Where did he go?'_

_A flash of blue and black and the kid was gone._

_"Damn it."_

()()()

_Ichigo heard someone panting from behind him and turned_

_It was the redheaded gorilla._

_"Did you catch him?"_

_"No."_

_The redhead pulled his long hair up into a high pony tail and then held out his hand, "Abarai Renji, what do they call you berry-face?"_

_"Kurosaki Ichigo and if you call me berry-face again I'll throw you into the nearest dumpster and leave you there."_

_The redhead grinned. "Fair enough." A pause "So ready to spend the next four years trying to best one another?"_

_Ichigo couldn't believe he didn't notice it sooner. Renji was wearing the exact same navy blue blazer that he himself was wearing._

()()()

_The auditorium was buzzing with noise._

_"Ichigoooo, over here, over here."_

_"You can come sit next to me if you want to Kurosaki-kun?"_

_"Ignore them. Come on let's grab those empty seats in the front."_

_Ichigo really didn't feel like picking between his next door neighbor (Inoue Orihime) and his child hood friend (Asano Keigo) so he moved down towards the front with Renji._

_A glimpse of electric blue caught his vision._

_It was that kid. The plushie snatcher._

_Ichigo wasted no time in jumping over the row of seats in order to get to the plushie snatcher._

_"Hey you!"_

_The blue-haired boy turned and said something in a foreign language before turning his back to the orange haired youth._

_Ichigo frowned and tried again. "You, leather and blue, I'm talking to you!"_

_He watched as a thin kid with long blond hair bent over and said something to the plushie snatcher. He couldn't understand a damn word much to his annoyance._

_A moment later, electric blue eyes met Ichigo's own cinnamon and coffee browns "Got a starin problem or somethin' Strawberry Princess?"_

_Ichigo understood every single word this time and then threw his fist in the kids face._

()()()

_"Honestly boys, fighting before school has even begun."_

_Ichigo was in the principals office, nursing a bloody lip._

_The blue-haired plushie snatcher was nursing a black eye._

_The orange haired youth smirked when he saw the kid wince a little._

_Electric blue eyes narrowed at him._

_A fist came down on top of the desk with a loud slam._

_"Fighting will not be tolerated on school grounds!"_

_The principal rubbed the sides of his wrinkled head. "Trouble makers- is just what I don't need. And you of all people should know better Grimmjow."_

_"Tch, whatever you say gramps. I didn't ask to come to this cruddy country, I'd be happy to go back to my home land."_

_"You can't live in Canada on your own. Your not old enough."_

_"I got friends. Their parents wouldn't mind if I crashed with them for a while."_

_Ichigo raised a brow._

_Canada?_

_So the language he had heard the kid speaking in earlier was quite possibly French?_

_"Um?"_

_"Yes Kurosaki what is it?"_

_"He's from Canada?"_

_"Yes. He's my grandson. His mother recently passed away and-_

_"Shut up gramps! Don't tell this Strawberry Princess my personal business!"_

_"Oh hush Grimmjow, There's no need to keep a secret. Your living in Karakura Town now and you can use as many friends as you can get."_

_"Friends?" Ichigo stood up so fast he knocked his chair over. "I don't want to be friends with a plushie snatcher!"_

_"You keep saying that. Look Strawberry Princess I didn't snatch away anything. I gave the guy 30 bucks and walked out the door."_

_"The hell you did. It's mine!"_

_The blue haired kid snorted._

_Ichigo wanted to punch him again._

_"That is enough!"_

_()()()_

_"So Strawberry Princess, wanna show me around?"_

_"No I do not and can you please stop calling me that!"_

_"Let me think about that…uh no."_

_"Bastard!"_

_"If you play your cards right maybe I could become your bastard, all in good time."_

_"What the hell did you just say to me?"_

_The blue haired kid threw his head back and laughed. "See you round Kurosaki."_

()()()

**END FLASHBACK**

()()()

"Grimmjow huh? Wonder what he's up to?"

Ichigo climbed off his bed, went over to his desk and picked up his old Senior Year book and flipped through it until he found a picture of his former rival.

Electric blue hair, electric blue eyes lined with shadow and liner, sharp angled face set into a cocky grin, dressed out of code (as always) and throwing a big F U to the camera man (which had been blurred out of course.)

"I bet your still the same cocky bastard aren't you?"

He flipped to the back of the book and sure enough there it was…Grimmjow's name, address and a lock of electric blue hair.

"Hmm wonder why I never noticed it before."

Ichigo wracked his brain for the memory. Trying to dig up the year book signing…

Bits and pieces of it came to him

Grimmjow had picked his lock and at the time Ichigo had thought his blue haired rival was just stealing something from his locker.

But when he looked through his things everything was, as it should be-well almost-

The cover on his yearbook was slightly bent but he had chalked it up to having too much crap piled in there at the time.

Never could've guessed that…

"So that's what he was doing."

Ichigo shut the yearbook. Climbed back on to his bed and fell asleep.

()()()

_**SCENE CHANGE/DAY CHANGE**_

()()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow Jeagerjaques was as manly as his outer appearance suggested. He enjoyed drinking, smoking and fucking until the sun came up.

He didn't care much for morals or the standard cookie cutter life style

Didn't care much for long-term relationships and felt that commitment was a fucking joke.

Nor did he care what others thought of him-well most of the time anyway.

For you see Grimmjow has a secret.

Every Friday at noon, he locks his bedroom door and releases his inner DIVA, _Pantera._ Some would call it dressing in drag.

Grimmjow doesn't give a flying fuck what some would call it.

_Pantera_ is his alternate persona. A saucy and sassy take no shit bitch.

Step one: Placing a short black tapered bob styled wig on top of his head.

Step two: Wiping off his trademark blue eye shadow and replacing it with a smoky gray color.

Step three: Lipstick never comes off and Lip Gloss is Fucking Disgusting. So he settles for a thin lip liner, which is only one shade darker then the color of his own mouth.

Step four: Slip into a white wife beater, dark blue skinny jeans and thigh high leather black boots.

Step five: Pull out old fashioned record-yes a record.

And when the music starts, forget lip syncing, Grimmjow sings his own rendition of "Dancing Queen"

There is a knock on the door.

Rather than panicking, the blue haired male moves towards the door and opens it, stepping back so he can let his blonde haired roommate inside.

"Some thing you need Halibel?"

The woman with poison green eyes takes in his appearance for a moment. "Not bad, next time less liner though."

She crosses the room and sits down on top of his bed.

"So anyway a bunch of us are heading to Smog around 8, wanna come along?"

"Depends," a cocky grin "Any one worth my time gonna be there?"

"That's like what the 6th time you've said that with in the last 48 hours and yet you still refuse to tell me who-

"If I told you then you'd just go and try to snatch him up for your self you shameless man-eater."

Green eyes rolled. "Says the Grade A cock pig himself."

"That's Cock-pig-san to you, Hali-chan."

Another eye roll. "So Smog are you-

"Sure I'll come. Kaze still owes me 50 bucks so might as well collect."

"You know he's just going to tell you that he's broke again don't you?"

Grimmjow shrugged. "Not exactly strapped for cash these days, I just like to watch him squirm."

Kazeshini is neither friend nor foe. He lives one floor below them and has a reputation for being both a perverted voyeur and a snooper.

Snooping through laundry and mailboxes…

And then grinning and skipping away like some sort of modern day puck from a mid summer's nights dream.

It drove Grimmjow insane or close to it anyway.

"Still mad about that huh? If it makes you feel any better, he went through my mail too."

"No it doesn't. And you're missing the point Hali-chan, that invitation was meant for my eyes only!"

Halibel was a smart woman. He thought she'd understand. Thought he had made it perfectly clear.

"It's just a pink post card Grimmjow. It's not a damn lottery ticket."

Stupid woman-why couldn't she just?

"It means a hell of a lot more than a damn lottery ticket! It means all of those almost there but not quite there moments all those unsent messages, all those would have/should have been fondling sessions did mean something. It means I no longer have to fool around with cheap knock offs because I'll have the real one." Electric blue eyes blazed, "If there was ever someone that I would give up my l-

"Save the declarations of love for Friday night Grimmjow because only then will it truly mean something." Halibel stood up and headed for the door "You might want to change back into your regular clothes because Szayel, Luppi and Ilfort are on their way over and you know if they catch you in that they'll just want you to become the new fourth member to their bubblegum Quartet."

"New?"

"The last one left, said something about opening his own salon."

"Thanks for the heads up Halibel."

()()()

Grimmjow shut and relocked his bedroom door. While he was removing his boots he thought of the invitation once more.

Or rather the person who sent the invitation-although he couldn't be entirely sure that it really was Kurosaki. He wasn't an expert in handwriting but there was something off about it, especially the curled **Q.**

_Grimmjow had looked over his former rivals shoulder quite a few times during class and took note of the unique way Kurosaki wrote his __**Q'**__s._

_A part of Grimmjow thought the Strawberry was doing it on purpose, torturing him in a subtle way. The other part of Grimmjow thought that Kurosaki had curled his __**Q'**__s in that way because he was subconsciously thinking about him._

He reached under his pillow and picked up the invitation for (he lost count) how many times exactly and studied the **Q **in his name and frowned. It was sharper, almost looking as though the writer had forced their hand to replicate the unique **Q.** Still-the return address was Kurosaki's. Grimmjow knew this for a fact.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_During the middle of their Second Year, everyone was going to the princess' pool party. Or rather-almost everyone-Grimmjow himself had not been invited, not that he gave a damn one way or another._

_He did wonder why they were throwing said party at Kurosaki's place though._

_So he did what any (obsessed) rival in his shoes would do, he snuck in. Okay technically all of the doors were left wide open so all he had to do was walk in while everyone else was out by the pool._

()()()

_He found the strawberry in the kitchen. The orange haired youth was refilling the punch bowl._

_Simply for educational purposes-Grimmjow took note of his rival's hair, it seemed like it had grown out a little. It didn't look bad just different._

_"Don't you ever get tiered of being everyone's lap dog Kurosaki?"_

_Cinnamon brown eyes shot open in surprise before narrowing. "Don't you ever get tiered of being a complete asshole?"_

_Grimmjow leaned lazily against the kitchen counter. "Nah, not really."_

_"They have names for people like you Jeagerjaques."_

_Grimmjow turned to the new voice. Kuchiki Rukia. She was pretty enough with her petite stature, large silver blue eyes and raven-hair but she was also sickeningly protective over the orange haired youth._

_It turned Grimmjow's stomach every time that a girl, not even reaching 5 feet in height (unless she wore heels) was always trying to shield his rival away from his view._

_He grinned at the girl nastily "Oh yeah and what's that Kuchiki?"_

_"Freak, stalker, obsessed, take your pick. They all fit." The look on her face was clear, she did not trust him for a second and really why should she?_

_In fact she had every reason to dislike him._

_She turned away from him and focused her attention on his rival. _

_"Finish up in here Ichigo and then come back outside. The fire works are about to start." She grabbed the punch bowl from the berry teen and then headed back outside._

_Grimmjow couldn't stand the longing look that Kurosaki constantly had on his face whenever the raven-haired girl's back was turned. It irritated him and perhaps a little something more. Not that he was really ready to-_

_"You could stay if you want. So long as you don't pick a fight or something."_

_Kurosaki was talking to him again._

_"That some kind of way to call a truce Kurosaki?"_

_The orange haired youth shrugged and then walked over to the refrigerator._

_Electric blues did not watch him bend over-they did not grow darker with carefully concealed lust at the sight of-_

_A bottle of water came flying at him just then and if Grimmjow didn't have quick reflexes-_

_His rival stood up and faced him. "So anyway about last Tuesday I-_

_"Forget it Kurosaki."_

_Grimmjow really had no desire to think about the t kiss that had almost happened last Tuesday after school in the boy's locker room. _

_Or rather he didn't want to think about how good Kurosaki had smelled, didn't want to think about the flash of something (besides disgust) flashing in his rivals eyes right before Kurosaki had come to his senses and-_

_"No you need to hear this."_

_No he really didn't._

_"When you cornered me in the locker room like that-_

_"I didn't corner you Kurosaki, don't be such a-_

_"Shut the fuck up for a minute!"_

_Brown eyes flashed._

_"Such a foul mouth for a lil' Strawberry Princess."_

_Brown eyes narrowed. "Being an inch or two shorter than you is hardly considered little and I thought I told you to stop calling me that!"_

_Grimmjow moved a little closer to his rival "I wasn't talking about your height Kurosaki."_

_The boys' cheeks pinked. "Y-you fuckin' pervert I knew you were-!"_

_"Ah don't flatter your self, like I'd really want to look at a scrawny princess like you-_

_It was a lie-his rival was actually quite-_

_"I'm not scrawny!"_

_"Well maybe not forever but-_

_He wondered for a moment what his rival might look like later in life or hell even next year-possible growth spurt maybe or-_

_"Look Grimmjow this is stupid. Here I am trying to apologize for spraining your wrist last Tuesday and all you can do is-_

_"What the hell is this Kurosaki? Or rather what are we cuz we sure as hell ain't friends?"_

_Why the hell was he asking this qu-_

_"We're," orange brows furrowed. "We don't need a label. And you know I wouldn't have sprained your hand if you hadn't tried to k-well you know!"_

_"Me? This is my entire fault is it? What about you? Since day one, no before day one, back in Freshman year you attacked me out of nowhere."_

_"Because you stole what was mine!"_

_"Are you still on about that? You're what 15 now, get serious Kurosaki what the hell do you need with a plushie anyway?"_

_"That's none of your business and argg damn it what the hell do you want from me Grimmjow?"_

_A sneer. "Nothin."_

_No one but his rival got him so easily fired up._

_"Then why do you continuously tr-_

_"What?"_

_"Don't play stupid. I know you have more than one brain cell Grimmjow."_

_"Gee thanks for noticing."_

_"I'm serious."_

_"So am I."_

_"Look Grimmjow I-_

_"Save your breath Kurosaki."_

_The orange haired youth threw his arms up in frustration, "You see that right there, that's exactly what I'm talking about._

_What the hell do you want from-argg I don't get you," Shaking his head. "You fall asleep in class and yet some how always manage to pass with flying colors. You knew I wanted to run against Ishida for class present but you just had to one up me and run for student council, only to drop out of it a week later._

_And then when Coach Kensei came up to me and asked me to join track and I agreed, less than 24 hours later, there you were, I swear its almost as if you-" the strawberry trailed off._

_"Really quick to point the finger eh Kurosaki? Yet you seem to forget that long after the plushie incident you continued to come after me. The school play, I was supposed to be King but then you turned everyone against me and I wound up being a fuckin' henchman._

_Then when Valentine's Day rolled around you got all pissy like some G D hell-cat and attacked me out of nowhere when all I did was walk up to your precious princess. Hell I can't help it if she misinterpreted a friendly chat for something else._

_Didn't mean you had to turn around and announce to the whole school that I was some kind of panty thief. I mean there I was just minding my own business when a bunch of security guards come after me."_

_"How was I supposed to know that the janitor was the real creep I mean-_

_"They sent me to Juvi Hall do you have any idea what that's like Kurosaki."_

_A snort. "You were only there for a week and I did apologize."_

_"Yeah a month later."_

_"Yeah well you're always sneaking off with those two twins and how the hell was I supposed to kn-_

_"That's the real joke right there. Everyone goes on and on about how sweet and non-judgmental and forgiving you are. Kurosaki wouldn't hurt a fly, Kurosaki has an excellent judge of character or that boy is so amazing the other day he helped an old lady and her dog across the street, I swear I'm going to marry him one day and ugh! People are so obsessed with you they think the freakin' sun shines out of your ass!"_

_"What the hell does that have to do with anything? You purposely pick fights with Renji and Chado because you know how much it pisses me off. You continuously flirt with Inoue and Nel, thinking their complete dimwits but you never even consider their feelings. And every time Rukia is around y-_

_"What the hell do you care what I do and don't do? I think you're just trying to find a reason to hate me because you don't want to a-_

_"I don't want to what Grimmjow?"_

_"Forget it I'm not wasting my breath on a clueless Strawberry Princess. I'm outta here. Enjoy your party, Kurosaki."_

_And cue the uber dramatics…_

_"So that's it then? You don't even want to consider a truce? You just want to go on hating one another?"_

_Hate? Ha if Kurosaki only knew how much he didn't-_

_This was stupid all of it._

_**'What in fucks name am I doing? Getting ready to storm outta here like some chick from one of those stupid soap operas.'**_

_There was a hand on his shoulder. Kurosaki's hand._

_"I really am sorry about your wrist Grimmjow but if it makes you feel any better I still get phantom pain in my left ankle every now and then."_

_Actually it made him feel worse. He never meant to break Kurosaki's leg in the opening of their 2__nd__ year-never meant to-_

Kurosaki's hand felt so warm-a personal heating pad. Grimmjow felt a true smile come over his face but quickly stomped it down.

"Can you stop fucking touching me before I turn around and re break it!"

He wouldn't really do something like that. Hell he wasn't even angry with Kurosaki-he was mad with himself for-

Ah inner conflict and erratic hormones-the joys of being a teenager.

The hand left his shoulder. "You're always such an asshole I don't know why I- the rest of the boys words turned to mumbles.

Grimmjow didn't know what had come over him just then but he had to-

"What are you doing tomorrow?"

"What am I doing?"

That was Kurosaki. Looking and sounding as clueless as ever.

"You busy or something?"

"What is this-why are you?"

"Just answer the fuckin' question! You free or not?"

"But why I mean-

But Kurosaki was Kurosaki and it felt like they were going in circles.

"Look don't get your hopes up or anythin' its just a bunch of us are going to the paintball arena, we're short a man or two, you can bring the monkey or somethin' if you want."

He didn't wait for Kurosaki's answer. He just left.

()()()

**END FLASHBACK**

**()**

Grimmjow snorted at the memory.

"In the end he never showed anyway."

_'Then again I guess it's partially my fault since I forgot to tell him the address and all.'_

()()()

Smog was one of the best Hookah lounges in Seireitei. Seireitei was just about 70 miles outside of Karakura Town.

Grimmjow had been to Smog many times and he never got enough of it. The music, the food, the atmosphere and the oh so damn good taste of pure tobacco. On his tongue, his lips, everywhere.

Halibel had chosen a tent this time.

The twins (Szayel and Ilfort) the poster boy (Luppi) the lipstick lezie (Apache) the Arabian Princess (MilaRose) The Can Get Anyone Guy (Kazeshini) The Man Eater (Halibel) and the Grade A Cock Pig (himself) made it in 8 in total.

()()()

While the Hookah was being passed around Grimmjow let his imagination run away with him a little.

_A week from now, long after the coming out party was over, he would bring Kurosaki to Smog and get his former rival to dance for him._

_He imagined how the orange haired male would move and bend his perfectly toned body, how those pretty eyes would glaze over with lust and how those naturally pouty peach colored lips would-_

"FUCK!"

Smacking his head against the table was never fun not to mention-

The sound of laughter reached Grimmjow's ears and he scowled.

Halibel was smirking at him. "Dreaming of someone special."

"I wasn't dreaming." He snarled, "This table is too fucking low."

The group continued laughing.

"Sure, blame it on the table."

"To hell with this!"

Grimmjow stood up.

"Hey where you going?"

"Yeah the night's barely started."

"Fuck off!"

()()()

**END CHAPTER**


	3. Chapter TWO

Disclaimer: There are many great rock stars but there is only one Kubo-sensei and I am not him!

A/N Chapter two at last! Assuming you're still reading this that is.

For Ane-chan: The rainbow at the end of my cloudy day

GrimmIchi, others, language, grammar, punctuation, non-beta-ed, switching views, violence, flash backs, dialogue, WIP, OOC-ness, drama, etc…

Summary: It's not every day you receive an invitation to your former rival's coming out party.

Drunken SeaHorse

CHAPTER TWO

Saturday

(Grimmjow)

What Grimmjow was about to do was probably above and beyond stupid-He should turn back now and forget all about-

_'Ah who gives a fuck-I'm just taking a peak-just enough to see if he's grown and inch or two since I've last seen him. I'm not going to reveal myself I just want_

"Who's out there?"

A voice. Female.

Grimmjow may be many things but a coward was not one of them-he most definitely would not run off and hide. No he would step out into the early morning sunlight and

"Greetings I seem to have fallen asleep in your back yard while I was looking for my cat."

The woman with copper, honeycomb and brass curls eyed him suspiciously-not that Grimmjow could blame her-

_'Looking for my cat of all things? Could I be any dumber?'_

As our favorite blue haired smartass bashes himself inwardly he fails to notice that the woman, Kurosaki Masaki, is quickly approaching him-and it is not until he feels a sharp pain of his finger being bent back when realizes she's not buying his bullshit line for a minute.

A lesser man would probably squeal about the pain-this is not to say that Grimmjow doesn't feel pain for he does but-

Taking one look into those eyes that are so very similar and yet so entirely different from his former rival-he grins

Briefly registering the pain that has now blossomed past his fourth finger and now moving into his wrist as he slips into another memory

()()()

FLASHBACK

_Junior Year_

_Rumors. Ah some of the best fights are the result of rumors. The best part was the woman was such a slutty cougar anyway that it hadn't taken much to convince everyone to believe his lies._

_"You fucking sick piece of shit!"_

_The sound of footsteps could be heard._

_"I'LL KILL YOU!"_

_The angry roar that could only belong to Kurosaki Ichigo, Grimmjow's one true rival._

_Eyes fierce, nostril's flaring, Grimmjow barely had time stub his cigarette out as a blur of black and orange charged towards him._

_'But of course Kurosaki is too fuckin' noble to attack me from behind.'_

_Blood flew out of Grimmjow's mouth as his rival's fist connected with his face._

_He sneered. "Take it that means you got my little present eh Strawberry Princess?"_

_Brown eyes had gone from fierce to positively murderous-Grimmjow staggered a bit as a second fist hit his face._

_He spat out another glob of blood and continued taunting the orange haired teen. "Pack quite a punch for such a lil prin-_

_Grimmjow hadn't even been able to finish his sentence-_

_"You sick (punch) son of a bitch (punch punch punch) I can't believe I (punch)_

_Rage 100 percent pure RAGE!_

_Grimmjow found himself fascinated-sure he had fought Kurosaki before-kicked the smaller boy's ass from here all the way to the next town and back-and sure the orange haired teen had his own share of victories (something Grimmjow really rather not think about) but this-_

_Kurosaki's chest was heaving, every fine muscle in that lovely lithe physique (yeah he'd admit it in his own head at least-the boy was a looker-) had tightened, the way the one singular vein on his neck was twitching, throbbing, calling for Grimmjow's attention-nay demanding it!_

_"DO YOU HEAR ME YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE?"_

_"Actually nah I was lost in your beauty if you'd kindly repeat you're words I-_

_(Punch) (Punch) (Punch)_

_The boy had abandoned Grimmjow's face and was attacking his abdomen, pummeling at it continuously as though he were a fucking punching bag at the gym._

_'Stranger thing is I'm not even hitting him back.'_

_"Fight back you bastard! Give me a reason to-_

_"A reason to what Kurosaki?"_

_Grimmjow grabbed his rival's hands-squeezing the smaller wrists until they went still and the boy winced slightly._

_The rage was still there but it had simmered a bit-shifting into pain and disbelief?_

_Grimmjow furrowed his brows. 'Is it possible he might-?_

_Pain blossomed on his right knee cap, then another to his shin, knocking him off balance_

_Kurosaki always was a crafty fighter_

_Flat on his back with his rival practically straddling him._

_Grimmjow grinned and earned a black eye as the orange haired boy hit his face once more._

_And then his rival did something quite unexpected._

_"Why did you do it Grimmjow?"_

_"Why did I go after the music teacher? Maybe cuz I fuckin' felt like it!"_

_"You're lying! Tell me the truth!"_

_Grimmjow snorted in disbelief. "Are you fuckin' kiddin' me Kurosaki?"_

_"Does it look like I'm joking you bastard?"_

_Grimmjow grinned cockily "What can I say? Bitch had it comin' to her. Easy target, it was no secret that-_

_"WHAT?"_

_Ah the angry roar once again-if Grimmjow didn't know better he'd swear his rival was part animal-_

_"Don't fuckin sit there and grin at me. You just cost an innocent woman her career, you destroyed her reputation, and possibly even her marriage!"_

_"Wake the fuck up Kurosaki! That bitch ain't no woman. She's a cougar-a cougar who was only 2 more lessons away from turning you into a real boy."_

_Orange brows furrowed in confusion. And then a minute or two later brown eyes narrowed. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"_

_Heavens above his rival was so painfully clueless at times. Grimmjow felt another grin break out onto his swollen face._

_"Tch. Didn't mommy dearest ever tell you about the temptress in the garden, Kurosaki?"_

_At the mention of his mother the brilliant raging fire returned to Kurosaki's eyes once more. "You leave my mother out of this!"_

_Grimmjow wanted to laugh. He wanted to laugh loud enough to wake the fucking dead. As it was-_

_"Why would I want to do that? This all started because of her."_

_"WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY ABOUT MY MOTHER? WAIT! HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN KNOW MY MOTHER? JUST HOW TWISTED AND DEGRANGED ARE YOU?"_

_"Everyone knows about the lovely, bright and talented Kurosaki Masaki. Envied by groups of women half her age and every man who has a healthy libido drool at the mere sight of her beauty. But her heart only belongs to one, her son, her perfect Ichigo. The ideal mother/son bond. Let's write a screen play about them." Grimmjow recited in an out of character high pitched tone before sneering "Ugh! Gut me why doncha?"_

_"What the hell does any of that have to do with anything? I love my mother, so what?"_

_A scoff. "There's love and then there's love and you strawberry princess couldn't be more obvious, it's written all over your damn face!"_

_"Are you suggesting that I-are you? (cue the flying fist once more-when he had let go of his rivals wrists Grimmjow honestly couldn't say-_

_"I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE THAT YOU WOULD MAKE THAT KIND OF ACCUSATION ABOUT-NO YOU KNOW WHAT FUCK IT! I DO BELIEVE IT." Eyes blazing "IF IT ISN'T ONE THING ITS ANOTHER THING. ARE YOU THAT FUCKING BORED AND MISERABLE THAT YOU HAVE TO ATTACK MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MOTHER?"_

_"You brought this on yourself Kurosaki."_

_"I-what the fuck do you mean by that Grimmjow?"_

_"Couldn't have the real thing so you had to go and get yourself someone who closely resembled her and I gotta say you've got quite an eye for it-_

_His rival looked sick and horrified at the same time._

_"Are you saying that I not only have a mother complex but that I purposely signed up for music lessons with Rangiku-san because she resembles my mother from certain angles?"_

_"Congratulations, give the strawberry princess a prize."_

_"Fuck you!"_

_"No fuck you but only when you beg for it. Then I'll bleed you nice and slow."_

_The time for talk was over apparently-as his rival climbed off him and shifted into a street-fighting stance._

_Grimmjow stayed right where he was. "Don't you wanna hear the rest of my little tale Kurosaki?"_

_"No I wanna break your fuckin neck so get the fuck up!"_

_"Nah I think I'll just take a nap right here. You can stand there and continue being my personal parasol-my how thoughtful you are shielding my greatness from the sun."_

_The orange haired boy wasn't laughing._

_Obviously._

_And despite his words and stance he stood there with his arms crossed._

_Grimmjow amused himself with the image of his rival standing inside his kitchen with an apron on and a spatula in one hand-the orange strawberry would scold him for eating the pie with out using a fork and-_

_"I SAID GET THE FUCK UP!"_

_Hands (strong but smaller than his own) gripped the hood on Grimmjow's jacket, pulling, forcing him to his feet._

_"Can't seem to keep your hands of me today eh Kurosaki?"_

_His rival shoved him._

_"Don't be shy now strawberry princess it's high time we moved past first base anyway."_

_Red bloomed on his rival's cheeks. It was all too fitting. "Shut the fuck up and fight me!"_

_Electric blues flashed. "Make me."_

_ANGRY ROAR!_

_Kurosaki was looking more and more like a caged animal-he almost wanted to ask his rival where he was hiding his tail?_

_As the orange haired boy continued to stand there looking angrier than ever-Grimmjow let his mind wander back to where it truly started-his real reason-the reason he wouldn't dare tell his rival-_

_()()()_

_The anniversary date of his own mother's death was coming up-just 24 hours away and Grimmjow was in a seriously fucking pissed off mood. If someone so much as breathed on him or looked at him too long he'd fuckin' lose it!_

_His aura was probably darker than a fuckin' black tunnel at the moment._

_Naturally most people were wise enough to stay out of his way._

_Key word here is MOST-_

_Certainly didn't stop him-_

_His rival practically skipping through the town with his mommy dearest-Grimmjow couldn't fucking stand it. Couldn't stand the way they laughed as they selected 2 identical grapefruits in the grocery isle. Couldn't stand as the happy mother and son danced towards the cash register with dopey grins on their flawless faces._

_And on his way out of the supermarket he saw her-_

_Forever bubbly and sparkly eyed. Matsumoto Rangiku. She was as sweet as she was pretty. Nicknamed "TILF" Boys would sign up for her class just so they could check out her eye popping jugs when she bent over to pick up her baton. From certain angles she could pass as a cousin or possible younger sister of Kurosaki's mother. Dear sweet auntie Rangiku._

_He would destroy her life._

_Spread rumors that her little after school private lessons had nothing to do with reading music sheets or practicing scales._

_Au contraire- she was acting inappropriately with her male students._

_()()_

_And when that wasn't enough Grimmjow enlisted a little extra help from his boys._

_Szayel and Illfort, two transfers like himself._

_The perks of coming from another county? Speaking in a language that very few if any could understand._

_Szayel was on the school newspaper and Illfort was a member of the student council._

_Together the fraternal twins had written an article entitled 'Keep your pants on because there's a GD COUGAR ON THE LOOSE!'_

_()()()_

_Truthfully Grimmjow wasn't too happy with his own actions-he probably had over done it but jealousy and grief does that to a person._

_He targeted his rival or people that his rival cared out because in the end_

_'We're so fucking similar. Me and him.'_

_He'd known it since the first day. Back when he first met the Strawberry Princess._

_Not that he'd admit it out loud._

_'At least not yet.'_

_"So princess are you going to make good on your promise and kill me or are you just gonna continue to stand there and admire the sexiness that is me?"_

_Like clockwork the orange haired boy charged-this time Grimmjow met his rival head on-Butting heads like fucking bulls-_

_His own head swam but he didn't give a damn._

_This was the way things should be._

_Trading blows with his number 1 rival._

_Course if he was going to be honest with himself Kurosaki was his number one everything but-_

()()

"I won't let you harm my son."

Grimmjow frowned he didn't remember that part happening in-oh wait

Back to reality!

Kurosaki Masaki. He would have thought the woman would have forgotten all about him but-

Apparently not.

"Why are you here? What do you want with Ichigo?" Soft eyes hardened "If you've come to tease him about his new path in life then I will-

"I'm not er-

"Very few people in the world have electric blue hair and I have lived in Karakura Town for many years and in that time I have only seen one with electric blue hair. So tell Grimmjow Jeagerjaques what do you want with my son?"

"Just to see him, maybe have a friendly chat catch up or something."

To hell with being manly! He should run. He should run while the woman-

Pain flares in his wrist again. She is demanding his attention.

Electric blues meet honey and amber.

After a moment of silence the woman speaks again

"Ichigo is not home. But even if he was I wouldn't let you see him."

"Listen lady you ca-

"No you listen to me boy (Grimmjow flinches-he hasn't been called that in years) if you want to speak with my son then you will have to have coffee with me first."

Um okay. He totally wasn't expecting that.

"Uh but he could come back any minute right and then you're little threat would be kind of pointless now wouldn't it?"

He couldn't believe he was being cheeky with a woman who could quite possibly castrate him on the spot!

But at the same time he wasn't going to let a woman push him around either!

Her pretty face went from a glare to a full-blown smirk. "I never said you would have coffee with me inside the house. You haven't earned that right." She released his wrist. "We will go to a café and you will tell me all about yourself and why you think I should let you date my son."

()()()

(Ichigo)

Sunday…

Baby showers. A celebration that no woman ages 16-100 could resist. But Ichigo wasn't a fucking woman!

So why in the hell had he been dragged to a baby shower?

Because underneath their angelic appearances Rukia and Inoue were freakin' demons from hell!

"Oh I do hope Nel-chan likes the gifts I bought for her."

"There not for her, it's for her unborn baby and she'll love them."

"Oh do you really think so Kuchiki-san?"

"I know so and stop calling me 'Kuchiki-san' now that we're together you should be calling me Rukia or Miss Bunny Fufu."

"Sorry it's still a little weird I mean for so long I-

Ichigo could hear the sound of lips smacking-which meant Rukia and Inoue were making out once again.

He was suddenly glad that the raven-haired girl had handed him several packages-forcing him to look at his feet so he wouldn't crash into anything.

Still-they were out in broad day light and anyone could-

"Can't you wait until you get home to do that?"

The two women giggled before pulling apart.

"You have no reason to be jealous Ichigo. In 5 days time you'll be the center piece in an all beef buffet."

"Oh Kurosaki-kun I'm so happy you've finally come to terms with who you're meant to be."

"And just think all it took was a nasty bitch in crotch-less panties."

"How the hell did you find out ab-(Ichigo stopped mid sentence as things started to sink in. "What the hell Rukia? How could you do that to me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Ichigo not even I would sink that low to pull you out of your denial."

"I wasn't in de-I never-arggg!"

"Don't be upset Kurosaki-kun. Baby Showers are supposed to be a happy event."

"That's right and just think in 10 years you'll adopt some babies and throw a shower of your own."

"Oh I do hope you decide to adopt girls. It would be so cute, you could put them in matching dresses and-

"I do not want to adopt a baby so just stop!"

"You say that now but once you find you'll change your mind."

"Mm hmm and oh just imagine when they grow older they'll have a joint wedding and-

"STOP!"

Ichigo stopped walking and dropped the packages on purpose so he could glare at the duo.

"Listen Inoue, Rukia I know you guys are just trying to support me in your unique way but it's not-I mean I don't want to talk about weddings and babies when I haven't even-

"Oh I see. Oh Ichigo you poor thing. Never fear we will put your mind at ease right now." The raven-haired woman reached into her bag and pulled out her cell-phone, quickly dialing a number."

"Hello could you give me the number to Cupid's Escorts."

What the hell was she doing?

Ichigo looked up at the sky asking for help from whoever was listening.

All this talk of babies conjured up another memory from the past

()()()

FLASHBACK

_**Sexual Education-Miss Mashiro Style!**_

_This is what the sign on the door read. Who ever dared to enter would soon find that after this course they would never look at sexual education the same way again._

_Kuna Mashiro is a carefree caffeine-addicted woman. With her apple and lime green colored hair, hazel eyes and colorful wardrobe, she is a favorite amongst the students._

_But for a teacher she doesn't quite fit the professional mold. Preferring to let her students dress out of code, play loud music and call her by her first name._

_She strongly encourages her students to explore all sides of their sexuality-_

_"For there are no rules in the land of love. And you should never deny yourself happiness just because society fails to understand that maybe you don't want to live in a big beautiful house with a white picket fence, two cats, a dog, 2 children and 1 SUV. Perhaps you want to live on an island where only you, your lover and your prized peacock are allowed. Perhaps you don't wish for love at all but would rather dedicate your life to Mother Earth or Coven of some sort. Loving yourself is just as important as loving some one else. Never forget that!"_

_She clapped her hands together. "Now I'm going to break you up into groups of 4 and tomorrow I have a big surprise planned for all of you."_

_"You know Mashiro-san wouldn't be half bad if she didn't talk to us like we were 6 years old." Ichigo whispered to Renji who was sitting next to him._

_The tattooed redhead snorted, "At least she didn't hand us a banana and a condom and show us how to slide it on."_

_"Well you wouldn't have need for that any way seeing as you two fruits are dickless!"_

_"What the fuck was that? Come here and say that to my face you-_

_"Sit down Renji, those guys aren't worth it."_

_Ichigo was pissed too but he really didn't feel like fighting-let alone even looking at his blue haired rival and his cronies today._

_"Yes better sit down cherry pineapple wouldn't want to get the wittle wifey all upset."_

_Ichigo was oh so tempted to rise up out of his chair, fly over seats in order to get to his cocky rival. But he remained seated._

_"Now, now Grimmjow you shouldn't attack Kurosaki and Abarai-kun for something they have no control over."_

_Szayel Grantz-Cotton candy pink hair, amber eyes, as uber fucking flamboyant as they came and yet he had the gall to attack Renji and himself!_

_Ichigo just didn't get what the fuck Szayel and Grimmjow hoped to accomplish with their childish taunts and-_

_In a flash blue and white was in his face._

_"Cat got your tongue strawberry princess or are you once again basking in the glow of my godly light?"_

_Grimmjow and his stupid grin-How Ichigo wished to rise up out of his seat and punch his rival but he found that lately whenever he wished to rise something else would rise-and there was no way in hell he was going to let his rival see that!_

_So he just snarled out the nastiness thing that could come to mind "Maybe if you spent less time looking at yourself in the mirror and more time brushing your teeth I wouldn't have to feel like gagging every time you put your damn fish breath in my face!"_

_This was a lie of course. For his rival smelled like brand new leather, winter air and nicotine but Ichigo rather not think about how good Grimmjow smelled-it would only make his 'not so little' problem under the desk worse._

_He heard Renji laugh as the rest of the class "Ooh-ed"_

_And then before Ichigo could properly blink his rival had picked him up and slammed him face first into the classroom window-_

_Blood poured down his face. He was glad it hadn't shattered for that would have been much worse._

_At the same time was it really necessary for his rival to stand so close in order to slam him-_

_'Hasn't he heard of personal space?'_

()()()

"Itsugo you came!"

Ichigo stumbled as a sea green and hazel blur came crashing into him. Pregnant belly and all Nel still had endless energy. She was grinning from ear to ear. "Nel's so glad-I mean I'm so glad you came!"

She squeezed him hard before releasing him.

"Uh happy baby shower Nel." He handed her a small package- it had been carefully wrapped in hot pink tissue paper with white polka dots.

She squeezed him again and then ushered the trio into the house."

()()()

FLASHBACK RESUME

_Ichigo was glad for the blood because at least it would cover up his blush-_

_He wanted to mentally kick himself-sure Grimmjow had slammed him into plenty of hard surfaces in the past and he retaliated by knocking his rival off a ladder, ropes, a flight of stairs-it was just like a routine-a rule really-they throw insults at each other and then they throw fists at each other-crashing into buildings, parks, anything and everything._

_But not once had he ever felt so damn-_

_'This has to stop-there's no way in hell I'm attracted to this jackass.'_

_Fucking hormones creeping up on him like some unwanted disease._

_'I better fucking get it together before he finds another reason to taunt me.'_

_With this thought in mind Ichigo forced both his blush and his hard-on to disappear-_

_His rival was gloating. His stupid lackies cheering him on._

_Ichigo took this opportunity to wipe the blood from his face with the sleeve of his shirt and then let out an angry roar_

_"GRIMMJOW!"_

_Ever the predictable Grimmjow grinned and then made a 'come at me' motion with his hand._

_Which only further fueled Ichigo's anger._

_For the next 10-15 minutes it was nothing but a blur of blue and white vs black and orange._

_Punch for Punch. Jab for Jab. Strike for Strike. Blow for Blow._

_Bruised, bloody and full of rage-!_

_So lost in the heated battle was he, Ichigo barely noticed the crunching sound-_

_And it wasn't until he heard a scream (Inoue)_

_That it dawned on him-the blue haired bastard had re-broken his ankle._

_()()()_

_'Just my luck-a broken ankle and being forced to team up with him for this stupid project.'_

_"I'm not tickled pink about this either Strawberry Princess but look we just gotta watch the brats for a few hours right? I'll take them on some of the roller coasters and you sit here and set up the picnic."_

_"Screw that! We're gonna go take the brats on the roller coasters while you to stay here and set up the picnic right Ichigo?"_

_There was only one real plus side to this whole little project-adventure-experiment-lesson-whatever._

_Miss Mashiro had put them in groups of 4 which sucked but at least Renji was with him._

_Although he hadn't had much time to chat with the tattooed redhead because Szayel had taken it upon himself to-_

_"Nonsense Abarai-kun you and I will take the children on the roller-coasters while Kurosaki and Grimmjow stay here and continue making moon eyes at each other."_

_Okay_

_WTF?_

_"What the hell is wrong with you ya damn pepto-freak? Can't you be normal for like one day?"_

_"That's calling the kettle black isn't it Abarai-kun?"_

_"Fuck you! Come on Ichigo let's go!"_

_Ichigo did not move from his spot in the grass. Nor did he say a word. He couldn't quite put his finger on it but there seemed to be something different about the way the way Renji and Szayel were interacting today._

_He noticed it earlier too while they were on the bus but chalked it up to being his imagination-_

_But the more he watched the pepto and the pineapple go at it the more he started reading in between the lines so-to-speak._

_'Is something going on between Renji and that guy? If there is did it just start or has it been going on for a while? He's awfully red right now and did Szayel just purr? Is that what I look like when I'm-_

_"Keh, these two are like an old married couple I swear."_

_Why the hell did Grimmjow suddenly decide to sit down and join him in the grass?_

_Why the hell did he notice?_

_Maybe because he always noticed his rival._

_Still-_

_"Renji it's for the kids. Just go with him and-_

_"What? Ichigo are you-you can't be serious man I don't want to go with-can you please stop invading my space?"_

_"Are you sure that's what you really want Abarai-kun?"_

_Another purr and this time the pepto-boy was touching Renji's arm-not that the redhead seemed too happy about that-_

_"See that right there, foreplay."_

_Why the fuck was Grimmjow whispering in his ear now?_

_Why did it feel so damn natural to have his rival whispering in his ear to begin with?_

_Why didn't he tell his rival to get away from him?_

_Why was he just sitting here and-_

_(SMACK!)_

_No fucking way!_

_He did not just see what he thought he just saw-_

_Broken ankle be damned! He had to talk to Renji. NOW!_

_()()_

_"Don't be long Abarai-kun I still want cotton candy."_

_Szayel blew Renji a kiss and the redhead turned even redder._

_()()()_

_"What the hell was all that about?"_

_"Uh don't know what you're talking about Ichigo."_

_"Bullshit! We're best-friends Renji and if you're into Szayel-_

_"Er I'm not into him exactly-_

_" Um well anyway what ever is going on between you two I mean why didn't you say anything?"_

_"Uh say what? I just told you I'm not-that is-look it was just a stupid bet of sorts-_

_Ichigo furrowed his orange brows. "Bet?"_

_"Uh I really don't wanna go into it man, just uh look I don't even know how it-you know me man I'm not like that and even if I was which I'm not I would never go for a freak of a fairy like him because you know well um yeah and yeah and stuff."_

_"Huh?"_

_"Nevermind. Look Ichigo you're my best bud and I know I should never uh try to cross the line or anything and I didn't plan to even tell you-shit man I was gonna take it to my grave but then he came along and-_

_"What? Renji what are you talking about?"_

_"I-_

_The tattooed redhead was looking everywhere but Ichigo's face._

_"I-uhlikeyou."_

_It was one big clumped sentence. How the hell did Renji expect him to understand that?_

_"What? Say it slower this time."_

_"I said ( a deep breath) reddish brown eyes met cinnamon and coffee colored ones "I like you Ichigo."_

_Ichigo blinked once. He blinked twice. He blinked three times. Then he slapped his friend on the shoulder and laughed, "Good one Renji, you really had me going there for a mi-_

_"I'm not joking man. I'm dead serious. But if you're just going to stand there and make fun of my feelings for you then I'm leaving."_

_And with those parting words the pineapple ran away._

_Ichigo stood there on his crutches for-well he wasn't sure how long but a damn good long time-_

_Renji liked him?_

_How could that be possible?_

_For how long?_

_Why?_

_'Why couldn't you have said something sooner? Maybe then I wouldn't have f-' he shook his head-_

_"Penny for your thoughts strawberry princess?"_

_"Go away Grimmjow. I'm sure that even you and Szayel can handle a couple of snot nosed kids by yourself."_

_"Grantz is gone and as for the brats-lost em."_

_"What the fuck do you mean you lost them? You lost a bunch of children-what the fuck is wrong with y-_

_"Calm down princess I was only joking."_

_"Bastard."_

_"Yeah what else is new didn't start out that way you know."_

_"What?"_

_"Nothing."_

_Ichigo leaned on his crutches and dared to meet those all too familiar electric blues-the same blues that haunted him for the past fortnight while he lie awake in bed-willing himself to banish such thoughts-_

_"Where are the kids Grimmjow?"_

_"Your lil' princess and Kuchiki showed up. Took the brats to arcade room, said we should meet up around 4 and take them back home to their parents."_

_"And Szayel really left?"_

_"He had some things to take care of or rather someone."_

_"What?"_

_"Don't play stupid Kurosaki. We both know that you just broke the pineapple monkey's heart just now."_

_"You-! You were spying on me? Again?"_

_Grimmjow threw him a cocky grin. "No need. Could be heard from a mile away."_

_Ichigo felt sick to his stomach._

_"But I don't-_

_"Don't what Kurosaki?"_

_"Get lost I'm in no mood to put up with you right now."_

_"That's too damn bad. 'Fraid you're stuck with me."_

_Ichigo growled low. "I'm serious. Get the fuck away from me or I swear I'll-_

_He didn't even have the energy to fight. He just wanted to-_

_'I don't know what I want to do. Why can't I just be normal? I want to be normal damn it!'_

_Ichigo threw down his crutches and fell on the grass._

_He was exhausted._

_'Maybe I'll just fall asleep right here and-_

_Hands were around his waist. Quite against his will he was being pulled into his rival's lap._

_What the fuck?_

_"Let go of me!"_

_They were out in public. In the middle of fucking daylight and his rival was-_

_"Get off!"_

_"Oh I am baby."_

_Okay that was it. That was the last fuckin' straw!_

_Ichigo struggled out of Grimmjow's hold._

_And when he managed to get free-broken foot and all he let out a vicious snarl and charged!_

_()()()_

_Down, down the hill they tumbled_

_Trading punches and kicks_

_Not stopping for even a minute_

_As always Grimmjow was laughing like a fucking maniac_

_He'd swear the guy was a fucking nutcase if he hadn't seen his GPA score._

_Course didn't they say the best geniuses were fucking insane-_

_Not that the blue haired boy was a genius but he was a lot smarter than most realized-course Ichigo did realize but-_

_But that wasn't the fucking point_

_The more blood and bruises the more excited his rival seemed to become-_

_Ichigo just didn't understand-_

_Or at least he tried to tell himself he didn't understand-_

_Tried to tell himself he wasn't getting hard yet again as his rival threw him in the lake-_

_Tried to tell him self that he hadn't just shot a load off in his pants_

_Tried to tell him self that his rival didn't look even sexier when his hair was wet-_

_Tried to tell him self that-_

()()()

"Ichigo you idiot stop spacing out and come join us in the living room already!"

"What?"

Oh that's right he was at Nel's baby shower.

Ichigo glanced at the clock on the wall.

6:00 on the dot.

Where the hell had the time gone?

()()()

(Grimmjow)

Monday…

After his little coffee-date/interrogation meeting with Masaki, Grimmjow had spent the rest of the weekend working on 2 important speeches. The first was an apology and the second was the long awaited love confession.

Course knowing the way life normally played out when the hour of apology and confession came-he'd probably forget all about the perfect words that he had recited until he was practically blue in the face-and just say whatever was on his mind at that time-wing it, go with the flow, let nature take its course and whatever.

_'Hell its only Monday-anything could happen.'_

TBC


	4. Chapter THREE

Disclaimer: BLEACH has nothing to do with a seahorse so obviously it is not my creation. I own nothing.

A/N The best part about writing a story for someone else is brainstorming the ideas with that person. In addition after chatting with Ane-chan I've decided Drunken SeaHorse will be more than 5 chapters. Maybe 8? Not sure yet.

A/N 2 Why are Ichigo's parts usually longer than Grimm's? Eh probably because I write berry-centrics more often.

Anyway

ENJOY!

For the modern day siren, Ane-chan!

Warnings: AU, OOC, scattered flashbacks, switching views, GrimmIchi, othersIchi, othersGrimm, ShiroxUlquoirra, RukixHime, SzaxRen, etc etc etc blah blah blah

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

CHAPTER THREE

Monday

(Grimmjow)

Instead of dragging his ass out of bed and heading out the door to go to work on Monday morning Grimmjow opted to sleep in.

He'd probably hear an earful from Baragan but he really didn't give a damn about Death King's Auto Parts-it was just a temporary gig anyway.

Grimmjow had never desired to be a mechanic in the first place-it had simply been easy money.

Well working at the casino had been even easier but seeing as he had been banned from 12 out of 13 in Karakura Town well…

Course Ran Tao had always been rather forgiving so Grimmjow figured it was only a matter of time before the woman begged him to come back to _**'Crimson Ace.'**_

But for now Grimmjow was content to show up for work when he felt like it and live off his inheritance from a cousin he had never even met.

It was kind of funny how it happened-he had simply flipped his mailbox open one day and bam!

Although it was a bit of a pain in the ass to exchange Canadian bills but…

At the sound of the door bell Grimmjow let out an irritated growl and then rolled out of bed.

()()()

The girl couldn't be much more than 11-12 years old at best.

Not a hair out of place, a tear in her blouse or a run in her stockings. She was the picture if perfection and innocence.

Good thing too or Grimmjow would've slammed the door right back in her flawless face.

But he wasn't a total bastard.

"What are you selling and how much does it cost?"

As the young girl rambled off a list of items and prices Grimmjow did something that was becoming an everyday occurrence-he slipped into a memory in the past…

()()

FLASHBACK

_**Men don't bake!**_

_Men hunt but seeing as how there is no trace of wild life here in Karakura Town hunting is out of the question._

_Plus he doesn't think his rival would approve of his shooting, roasting and then eating an innocent animal-no matter if said animal had fangs or claws or rabies._

_In addition Grimmjow had no desire to wash blood out of his leather jacket._

_So he was stuck baking along with the rest of his posse._

_But it would be a cold day in Hades before he donned a frilly apron!_

_"Oh for the love of Athena would you please stop making that face Grimmjow."_

_"You don't even have to do anything but stand there and gather customers for our stand."_

_Sidekicks or not Szayel and Ilfort were almost over the top fruit-tastic at times._

_Not only were the non-fraternal twins wearing matching frilly little white aprons-just for the occasion they had also decided put their hair in pigtails._

_"Really and how do you expect me to do that?"_

_Szayel's amber eyes twinkled behind glasses "I'm sure you'll think of something."_

_Grimmjow considered these words for a minute_

_'Something eh? Or more like some one?_

_Surely it wouldn't take much since his rival was so popular and all-he'd simply have to convince the orange haired teen to bring his ass over to the brownie stand and everyone else would follow._

_'Hmm now how to go about getting his attention this time 'round.'_

_"I know that look all too well, he's thinking of Kurosaki once again."_

_"Is there ever a time when he isn't thinking of Kurosaki?"_

_Szayel and Ilfort's teasing tones pulled Grimmjow from his inner thoughts._

_"Think of something good Grimmjow?"_

_"I bet he did."_

_Grimmjow had indeed thought of something but he didn't plan to share it with the duo-instead he dipped his finger into the batter-_

_"What are you doing?"_

_Ilfort looked horrified._

_Grimmjow grinned as he brought the gooey coated digit up to his mouth "Testing it for poisons, never can be too careful these days."_

_"Next time use a spoon. Putting your fingers into OUR batter is incredibly rude-_

_"Not to mention barbaric."_

_Grimmjow rolled his eyes and walked off "I'll be back in a bit."_

_()()()_

_There was no need to rush since the official bake sale or whatever wasn't for another day or two._

_Which was good because then Grimmjow could put his plans into action with out rushing._

_Option 1) Laxatives-a classic prank forcing others to go to the bathroom-should they not make it in time the poor fools would wind up crapping their pants._

_As amusing as it might be to see the entire cheerleading squad be anything but perfect and beautiful Grimmjow wasn't so sure his ultra sensitive nose would be able to handle the smell-so NO to option 1._

_Option 2) Drugs-yet another classic._

_The idea of watching his classmates get high off of chocolate fudge brownies-_

_Or more accurately watching his number 1 rival get high off of brownies-course if Gramps found out-well that held no appeal whatsoever._

_So that left option 3) A different type of drug-or more accurately an aphrodisiac._

_Grimmjow let himself slip into a little day dream for a moment or two._

_According to a certain blue bird, Kurosaki had a bit of a sweet tooth so it probably wouldn't take much to get the orange haired teen to agree to buy some brownies._

_But where was the fun in just buying the brownies when he could sample em?_

_It was decided._

_Grimmjow would enlist the help from Muramasa, a self-titled "lust magician"_

_His potions were experimental at best so there was no guarantee it would even work._

_Still Grimmjow felt a smirk coming over his face._

_'It's worth a try.'_

_Once he mixed the potion into the batter he would offer a sample to the strawberry-ordering the other teen to lick his finger tips clean._

_One taste and Kurosaki's pretty brown eyes would glaze over and he'd beg for another taste-to which Grimmjow would laugh mockingly and refuse because he oh so loved to see the sight of his pouting rival._

_Grimmjow let his imagination take him further-_

_In a some what different scenario-his rival would go into uber brat mode and swap the brownie batter right off the table-smirk dancing on his lips as if to say come and catch me._

_And naturally Grimmjow wouldn't decline because he quite enjoyed chasing after his rival._

_()()()_

_He would find the orange haired youth up on the school roof tops-purr at the sight of his rival's body, which was now only artistically covered in the brownie mix-clothes completely discarded._

_But why dream when he could go and make it a reality?_

_At the sound of a giggle Grimmjow snapped out of his little fantasizing._

_And narrowed electric blues at_

_"Kuchiki what the hell? How long have you been there?"_

_The raven-haired midget looked amused which was a bit unusual since every other time the girl had only looked at him with disdain or suspicion._

_"I think the question here is what are you doing hovering outside Ichigo's home?"_

_Had he really been so lost in his little dream daze that he had waltzed over to Kurosaki's when he fully intended on heading well…someplace that most definitely was not his rivals._

_Grimmjow bit back a snarl._

_He didn't have to explain himself to Kuchiki._

_"Just passing through-got a buddy who lives this way not that it's any of your damn business, Kuchiki."_

_The raven-haired girl didn't look like she bought his lame excuse for a minute._

_"Anyway," Rukia continued, "Since you're here I might as well hand you this now."_

_Grimmjow looked down at the small box now in his hand. "What the hell is this?"_

_"Cookies." The girl answered simply._

_Grimmjow rose a brow "What am I supposed to do with a box of cookies?"_

_A shrug "I'm allergic to nuts but Ichigo looked so happy when he presented the box to me so-_

_"So why would you give it to me?"_

_Another careless shrug, "Who else would I give it to?"_

_Grimmjow studied the raven-haired girl for a moment or two. He didn't like the way her face was flushed-nor did he like the dark mark on her neck-it rubbed him the wrong way-_

_He damn sure was not jealous of Kuchiki!_

_"Anyway," came the sing-song tone "You really should eat those cookies. Ichigo doesn't give them out to just anyone you know."_

_"What the hell are you up to Kuchiki?"_

_A pause and then the raven-haired girl narrowed her eyes "Don't think for one second you got me fooled-you're totally completely in full blown lust with Ichigo."_

_Grimmjow could protest. But what was the point?_

_"Look Kuchiki I-_

_"Word of advice if you're really serious about staking your claim-"_

_Why was he listening to this? Why the fuck was he-?_

_"Spill."_

_"Get to know him. Become friends first-everything else will follow."_

_Grimmjow sneered, "Speaking from personal experience are you?"_

_There was a pause._

_And then she burst out into a fit of laughter._

_Which pissed Grimmjow off but he wasn't going to let the raven-haired girl see that she was getting to him._

_()()_

_20 minutes later…_

_The girl wiped her eyes and spoke "You are even thicker than I thought."_

_Grimmjow glared. "Whatever Kuchiki."_

_Rukia was still amused much to Grimmjow's irritation._

_The sound of her laughter was clear as a bell even as she started walking away._

()()()

END FLASHBACK

"Hey I haven't got all damn day are you gonna buy some damn cookies or not!"

Grimmjow blinked-the sweet and innocent little sales girl was no longer sweet and innocent.

She was snarling at him-her eyes narrowed to thin slits and she stamped her foot and crushed half of the items in her box in her anger

Grimmjow knelt down in order to address the not-so-angelic-child.

"If you ask me nicely I'd be happy to buy some brownies little girl."

"Don't treat me like a kid damn you! I'm 19 you hear me cat face? 19!" With a stomp of her foot-and a blow of a horn- seemed to appear out of nowhere-the not so angelic salesgirl left the apartment.

Grimmjow let out a snort and relocked the door.

()()()

Breaks ups. Always such a pain in the ass.

"How about one last fuck before I let you walk away from me for the last time."

"Wishing to forever engrave me in your memory eh Ashido?"

Unlike many of the other 'Kurosaki' stand-ins Ashido had actually grown on Grimmjow.

With his reddish brown hair, boyish face and hidden playful nature-not to mention that firm apple bottom.

It was never meant to be a long term thing. No commitment, no strings attached-

They had formed a bond of sorts but-

"Your lucky I enjoy your arrogant boasting or I'd-

"Don't bother finishing that sentence Ashido."

Eye roll "Right so since you're clearly not gonna fuck me at least let me come to movie night?"

"You sure are fuckin' needy tonight? What's the matter 'fraid you won't be able to carry on with out me?"

Grimmjow caught the foot that was flying towards his face.

And once again another memory was brought to the surface of his mind…

()()()

FLASHBACK

**Juvie Hall)**

_Grimmjow knew his obsession had been taken to new heights when he started comparing his life to some horribly cliché shojo drama._

_The girl whose thoughts were consumed by her crush while he was oversees-distance didn't matter because once the week was up she would see him again._

_()_

_He would brush a stray lock of hair out of her face before titling her chin upwards to give her the lightest yet most passionate of kisses-and then he would tell her to close her eyes for a surprise-_

_She would obey because the last thing she wanted to do was be stubborn with the number one love of her life._

_()_

_Only to open her eyes and glance down at the small gem he had placed around her neck._

_Face soft yet still wonderfully manly-he'd cup the side of her cheek and whisper "Be mine."_

_A single tear would fall down her flawless face as she breathed out a "Yes."_

_()()_

_The fact that he and his rival were both males didn't matter._

_The fact that Grimmjow and his rival would never act so pathetically dreamy didn't matter._

_The fact that Grimmjow was separated from his rival not because of family members or jealous friends-but a retarded misunderstanding didn't matter._

_The fact that Grimmjow was stuck in a cramped little space with a roommate who snored didn't matter._

_The fact that he was forced to freeze his fuckin' ass off every night after stepping out of shower because the fuckin' correctional camp couldn't afford a decent heater didn't matter._

_The only thing that mattered was the tiny pieces of colorful parchment clutched in Grimmjow's hand._

_In truth there was nothing particularly special about said parchment-_

_Because this was reality and his number 1 rival didn't do things like send him sweet and short little love notes._

_Besides Kurosaki didn't love him-hell the orange haired teen didn't even like him and yet…_

_The parchment the blue haired teen held in his hand-old detention slips._

_Call Grimmjow a fool-the biggest fool on the planet perhaps-hell he probably put fangirls' to shame-_

_He was convinced that all of those times Kurosaki had wound up in detention with him was not a coincidence at all-_

_Grimmjow had convinced himself that his rival simply couldn't stand to be separated from him for a long time-_

_Why else would Kurosaki have kept the old slips paper clipped inside that damn novel?_

_Grimmjow had planned to just mock the other boy when he first noticed but then once the whole incident with the 'princess and panties' happened well…he just wanted something that would tie him to his rival._

_Was it stupid?_

_Yes it was but Grimmjow didn't have to explain himself to anyone._

_No one had to know about how he had come to treasure the parchment._

_No one had to know how he planned to place said parchment into frames once he got out of this shit hole called Juvi Hall._

_Maybe he'd even Xerox off a copy and give it to Kurosaki like some sort of backwards Valentine's Day gift._

_Grimmjow snorted at the thought._

_Wow he was beyond fucking stupid but at this point he didn't care._

_Even if he hadn't snatched the parchment out of his rivals book he probably would have found something else-_

_Yes he was obsessed or whatever the equivalent of beyond obsessed was-_

_Even before this shit had occurred Grimmjow had been planning something which would have definitely pissed Kurosaki off._

_Still might do it once the week was up._

_He could picture it now._

_Early morning…before track even started-hell before school even started. There he would find his rival in the gym-wearing those ridiculously sexy short shorts-stretching and bending and completely oblivious to his surroundings._

_Wouldn't take much to shut off the lights._

_Wouldn't take much to pin his rival down and tie him up in ropes._

_Then flick the lights back on…_

_There was something so positively delicious about rope burn-extra delicious with the way his number one rival would squirm-_

_Grimmjow would probably get expelled but it would be worth it._

_Yes daydreaming of Kurosaki was an excellent way to pass the time._

_Truthfully the only way Grimmjow got through his days._

_Not that he would ever tell the other teen this._

()()

FLASHBACK END

"Even if you get to say all the things that you've always wanted to say how can you be sure he'll return your feelings?"

Ashido's voice never irritated Grimmjow as much as it was irritating him right now.

He was well aware that things might be er um less than rainbows and roses once he and Kurosaki cross paths after what sometimes did in fact feel like too damn long-

Well aware that if he overstepped his bounds Kurosaki's mother would throw him out on his ass!

Yet at the same time it wasn't in Grimmjow's nature to just let things play out-he would give it his best shot to keep his 'paws' to himself but then again

A few carefully placed words and an apology or two he could win Kurosaki over.

He'd probably receive a black eye or a cracked face but it would be worth it-

Because his number 1 former rival was always worth it!

()()()

(Ichigo)

Sharing a jail cell with Shiro and Ulquiorra was not how Ichigo thought he was going to start out the new week.

While it was true that they would only be stuck in the cell over night according to the guard-to Ichigo it felt like half an eternity had already passed.

Perhaps the current situation wouldn't be so bad-tolerable even-if the guys in the cell next to them weren't so GD annoying not to mention perverted.

"So tell me honestly how high are Starrk's chances to claim the orange head over there?"

"We will put your brother's name on the list for the party on Friday. During that time he can go ahead and make his proposal to Kurosaki-whether or not Kurosaki agrees is entirely up to him."

At first Ichigo had thought that he was hearing things because there was no way Ulquiorra would offer up Ichigo as though he were some sort of pretty piece of furniture at an auction

Step right up, step right-make your bids here!

But that is exactly what the green-eyed male was doing.

It had been the shrimps' idea-a petite chick standing at 4'11 tea-green hair and mismatched eyes, dressed in a long overcoat (which was ten sizes too big for her) and white and black striped Capri pants.

Apparently her narcoleptic brother, Starrk didn't get out and date much-seemed she had taken it upon herself to play matchmaker.

Although Ichigo wasn't too fond about being swooped up by some random guy well…he was kind of easy on the eyes.

Looking like he stepped out of a recent spring edition in a GQ magazine (yet some how wild at the same time) with his wavy medium length brown hair, ash gray smoldering eyes, slight goatee and suit and tie.

But that wasn't the damn point!

And not that Ichigo cared or anything but how had these two ended up behind bars anyway?

Speeding ticket? DUI?

Wait! Why did he care?

Well he didn't really he was just-

"Trust me," the girl continued "My brother has never been shot down-no matter how stubborn the one who has caught his eye might be."

"Well I've known Kurosaki for about 2 and a half years now and he is not the type to just jump into bed with some one," bottle green eyes flashed, "Believe me I've tried."

Ichigo wasn't sure how he felt about that. A bit weird but somewhat flattered at the same time.

Deciding he really rather not think about Ulquoirra or rather what the older male might feel towards him-Ichigo directed his attention to his cousin.

The powdered male didn't seem to have any problems getting all chummy with the other 'residents' inside the jail.

The subject open for discussion? His ass apparently.

"Sure King has a perfect ass but that doesn't mean I'm gonna let you near it unless," cue dramatic pause "you prove yourself worthy but even then I probably still won't let ya cuz' King is mine you see and I'm not so sure I wanna take the risk and let him be soiled by the likes of someone like ya."

Standing at an impressive height of 7 feet tall with silky black hair, dark beady eyes like a vulture, a long neck like an ostrich-actually all of his limbs were long, muscular and wiry, wearing a grin which was so damn wide it almost appeared as though it was permanently stuck that way, a somewhat rather intimidating aura radiating around him even though he had dressed in a fuzzy yellow hoodie and black leather pants (which Ichigo paused on for a minute since old rival had worn a lot of leather and-

'Best not to go there at a time like this.'

"Heh, that so little powder puff?"

Ichigo could not believe the guy had just called his cousin-

"What the fuck did ya just say?"

"You're not that much bigger than him, maybe I'll just claim the both of you."

Shiro was irritated and yet why the hell was he letting the guy cradle his face like that suddenly?

Ichigo looked back over at Ulquiorra-it wasn't a large prison or anything-surely the green-eyed man could hear this guy hitting on his lover couldn't he?

The orange haired youth could understand that Shiro and Ulquoirra were in an open relationship but still-even Ichigo felt a bit irritated that this guy was touching his cousin so casually.

"Get your hands off him!"

A hissing snarl-but unfortunately for Ichigo it seemed Mr. Perverse and Lanky was more amused and excited by his little out burst.

"So you can talk," the dark haired male stuck his free arm in between the bars and gripped Ichigo's wrist. "What's your name, pet?"

Pet? WTF?

Ichigo was ready to let out another snarl when-

"Knock it off Jiruga! I'm not gonna be stuck in this damn cell another night because you can't keep your hands to yourself-"-yet even as the owner of the new voice said this-his body language read something else entirely.

Simply to pass time-no other reason-Ichigo took in his 'saviors' appearance.

Well over 6 feet tall even with out the wild black hair and shiny bells, deep forest gray-green eyes ringed with gold, nose and mouth bringing to mind a grizzly bear who was only a few seconds away from taking a bite out of a juicy slab of meat, it was difficult to tell if the t-shirt and cut off jeans were torn from the guys rippling muscles or if it was just the style.

Not that it mattered.

"Hmm so you both want a piece of King eh?"

Ichigo bit back a groan.

Go figure Shiro would find this entire situation amusing-hooking up with random guys was something the bino-berry did quite often.

Not that Shiro was a slut or anything-he just enjoyed playing with others.

"Come to the party. Maybe if you ask nicely I can convince King into a little ménage a trios action?"

"What about you my pretty powder puff?"

"Me?" Shiro snorted, "Got things to do that night," a pause "But maybe I'll take a rein check or somethin'. He put out his hand "Name?"

"Nnoitra Jiruga."

Gold eyes flicked to the other dark haired male who still only had eyes for Ichigo-much to the orange haired male's embarrassment.

"Zaraki Kenpachi."

"Hn, Nnoi-Nnoi and Ken-Ken," Shiro produced a tiny notebook from out of nowhere "We'll expect you on Friday then, dress your best!"

Ichigo noted that neither male appeared to be too pleased about the nicknames that Shiro had selected for them but at the same time it was kind of amusing.

"So whatcha say King can these two come to the party?"

Ichigo rolled his eyes. As if his answer would make one damn difference or another. "Whatever."

At Shiro's cackle Ichigo decided to block out the noise and think back on how the entire 'jail situation' had begun in the first place.

()()()

FLASHBACK

_Earlier that same morning…_

_Spending most of his summer vacations and living only about 30 miles away from his cousin for most of his life, Ichigo was well aware that the powdered male had very little patience for well…anything_

_Ichigo hadn't even fully opened his eyes and Shiro was already dragging him down the stairs and out the door._

_()()_

_Ulquiorra was in the drivers seat today._

_"Good morning Kurosaki."_

_"Hey Ulquiorra." Ichigo yawned "Why did you guys wake me up so early?"_

_"It is 10:30am in the morning, that is not early."_

_"Oh um right well-_

_Ichigo had been up late last night rummaging through his closet-not really searching for anything in particular just a certain plushie from way back then-not that he was going to tell Ulquiorra or Shiro this._

_The duo teased him enough as it was-they were right up there with Rukia and Inoue-if not worse-_

_"You have some drool crusted over right underneath your chin, Kurosaki."_

_No worse. Much worse._

_"Uh," Ichigo angrily wiped at his chin, "Thanks."_

_"Cheer up King! We're going to breakfast!"_

_It was at times like these when the orange haired male almost forgot that his powdered cousin was actually a month older than him-because the way Shiro's eyes were lighting up right now-it was as though he were a child going to a theme park rather than a man going to simple breakfast._

_Not that there was ever such a thing as a simple breakfast with Ulquiorra and Shiro._

_Quite the opposite!_

_()()_

_"So let me tell you about this guy Quiorra brought home last night-_

_Ichigo had purposely turned the radio up higher so he wouldn't have to hear one of Shiro's stories-_

_The orange haired male let out a sigh._

_"Look uh Shiro I really rather not kn-_

_"His dick alone was like the size of a fuckin' python-_

_"Seriously Shiro I don't need to h-_

_"It's fine Kurosaki. This is the process."_

_Ichigo raised a brow. "Process?"_

_"Part of having mind blowing sex is mental, King."_

_"Uh-_

_"Trust us Kurosaki, when the time comes you'll think back to this moment and-_

_"Hey look over there, it's Noba-chin, he used to have such a crush on you King!"_

_"Noba-chin?"_

_Ichigo had never been very good with names and faces._

_"Let's go say hi!"_

_"Uh Shiro I doubt h-_

_"Step on it Quiorra!"_

_Ichigo was a bit surprised that Shiro could snap commands at Ulquiorra like that but the green-eyed male didn't seem to have any objections-_

_He was now going 85 in a 45 mile speed lane-_

_"Honk the horn Quiorra!"_

_Once again the dark haired male followed Shiro's instructions-practically making poor 'Noba-chin' fall off his bike._

_()()()_

_Most of Noba's face was shielded by the helmet he was wearing-just a tiny tuft of short ruby red hair, jade green eyes and a slightly pointed chin could be seen-average height, reasonably toned, donning a light gray parka, blue jeans and tennis shoes._

_As far as categories go-Noba would be labeled under cute-not that Ichigo was one to label but-_

_"Not really my type."_

_"You don't know what your type is King. You've only just begun sprouting your rainbow wings."_

_"He's right Kurosaki," Ulquiorra chimed in "Don't judge a book by its cover. Sometimes the ones who appear to be the shyest, nicest, sweetest turn out to be the kinkiest bastards on the planet-_

_"And sometimes," Shiro took over "The guys who appear to be brash, rough and tuff are big softies."_

_"And then you got guys like us,"_

_Ichigo rolled his eyes._

_Great-now Shiro and Ulquiorra were lecturing him in unison._

_"We play the appropriate roles based on the time, setting, and the other male."_

_Twin smirks "Or males."_

_"Meaning?"_

_"You'll see soon enough."_

_A pause. "Now go and grab Noba-chin and plant a big wet one right on his mouth!"_

_"No."_

_"You're making a big deal out of nothing King. What's a little tonsil hockey lovin' between friends?"_

_Ichigo grew quiet for a moment wondering if his rival ever went through with fulfilling his dreams of becoming a professional hockey player._

_Shortly after graduation, Ichigo had watched the sports channel and followed newspapers just to see if there had been any mention of a guy with the last name 'Jeagerjaques' but there hadn't been._

_Course it never dawned on Ichigo until just now-a lot of times professional athletes changed their names so maybe-_

_'I'll do a google or bing search or something when I get back home.'_

_"Don't just zone out at least go and invite Noba-chin to the party!"_

_"Uh I don't know Shiro I mean-_

_The powdered male ignored Ichigo just then and rolled down the windows calling out to the male on the bike_

_"Hey Noba-chin ya busy on Friday?"_

_Ichigo recalled that the redhead had a low murmuring sort of voice-it was very difficult to hear what his answer had been but with Shiro's thumbs up and Ulquiorra's fingers clicking away on his mini-phone, signs pointed to yes._

_Cue his cousin's mad cackling. "Good, good see you then Noba-chin!"_

_With a final wave-Ulquiorra stepped on the gas once again-_

_()()()_

_"Just park here Quiorra."_

_"What the hell? Shiro this is an expectant mother's parking spot, we're not chicks!"_

_Although even if Ichigo was protesting he had to admit that having a parking spot reserved for pregnant woman was pretty stupid but that was beside the point._

_"There's probably hidden cameras all over the damn place the moment we get out of the car and they see that we're three guys the police will-_

_"Don't worry your pretty little head King, Quiorra and I have done this plenty of times. Ready Quiorra?"_

_Ready for what?_

_Ichigo was about to find out._

_()()_

_"Tada meet my girlfriend Ula."_

_"Pleasure to meet you, Kurosaki-san."_

_It wasn't so much the wig and the makeup that was throwing Ichigo off as it was Ulquiorra's sudden soft soprano with a slight European under tone-_

_When and where had the green-eyed male learned to-?_

_Shiro snickered, "Works every time, come Ula, my darling, our public awaits."_

_()()()_

_Just because Ulquiorra was suddenly dressed and intimidating a chick was it really necessary to calculate all of the calories on the menu?_

_It just didn't make any sense to Ichigo. Ulquiorra had high metabolism so it's not like he would gain any weight._

_Plus the green-eyed male worked out the gym regularly so-_

_Ichigo shrugged his shoulders-let the guy do what he wants-he stepped up ready to make his order when Ulquiorra grabbed his arms._

_"Think about what you're about to put into your body. Nothing but fat and grease Kurosaki, fat and grease causes heart attacks and clogged pores. Is it your desire to die at an early age?"_

_Ichigo just snorted. "Don't be so dramatic it's only eggs and-_

_"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BREAKFAST IS OVER?"_

_Loud screeching which can only belong to his cousin Shiro._

_Ichigo glances down at his watch and sighs._

_'Well it is 15 minutes after 11:00am.'_

_The orange haired male is just about to calm the powdered male down when-_

_"Pardon the outburst. My mistake," a snicker "I'm an up and coming actor you see and this week my role was to play an angry customer." Gold eyes twinkled. "How'd I do?"_

_Ichigo wasn't buying it for a minute there was no way Shiro would give up having his breakfast that easily._

_He'd seen it happen enough times._

_Shiro didn't care if it was 15 or 30 minutes or 1 hour after 11 o' clock he would not leave with out his breakfast._

_It was at this point when Ichigo thought it would probably be best to slip away from his two fair-skinned companions-yes back out the door and-_

_"Stay Kurosaki I want to ask you a question."_

_Ichigo let out another sigh. While Shiro continued on with his little act-Ulquiorra started to ramble on about how many calories were in 'Hollows milk shakes' or something-Ichigo started to zone out 5 minutes or so after it started._

_Ulquiorra probably wouldn't even notice he wasn't paying attention._

_()()_

_Ichigo furrowed his brows wondering why it suddenly felt rather breezy -had someone left the door open?_

_The orange haired male also noted that it had grown incredibly quiet in the fast food establishment as well._

_Had he missed something?_

_Then he heard the all too familiar snicker from his cousin and a few sputters—_

_"W-what is the meaning of this?"_

_More snickering "It's called let's make a deal: I'll let you ogle King's ass if you give me breakfast!"_

_Cat calls and whistles soon followed-_

_"Yeah, take it off!"_

_WTF?_

_When had his pants been pulled down?_

_Ichigo considered his options he could A) act casually and even start posing just to keep up with Shiro's façade. Or B) He could quickly pull up his pants and flee._

_It really wasn't rocket science especially when-_

_"I'll give you 100, 000 yen if you let me spank that ass as well as ogle it!"_

_Still pretending to be a woman, Ulquiorra giggled behind his hand "We will consider it but only if you can convince the employees of McHollows to give my darling Shiro his breakfast."_

_"We'll gladly give you anything you wish Miss er-?"_

_"Ula, you may call me Ula."_

_Ichigo wanted to run and hide really he did but at the same time he was a man-so he had to stand his ground._

_()()_

_Bad decision._

_The sound of sirens-not the mythical creatures-but sirens which could only belong to vehicles which were owned and driven by_

_'Shit the cops. I can't believe this.' Ichigo cursed and then glared at the 'happy couple'_

_Shiro was munching away on his McHollow griddle-cake and Ulquiorra was taking dainty bites out of his Low calorie multigrain McHollowwaffle-both were completely oblivious to the angry officer who was making his way through the entrance door._

_Now would be the time to run-at least into the bathroom._

_Yes this is what Ichigo wished to do but at the same time-_

_'He's my cousin it wouldn't be right if I left him.'_

_With a resigned sigh Ichigo crouched down (there was no way he was going to let his bare ass meet a dirty bench) and just as he was lifting his spoon up to bring his oatmeal to his mouth metal cuffs were around his wrist._

FLASHBACK END!

()()

"Stop looking so damn blue King!"

"I'm not, just tiered."

"Go to sleep then. We'll be out of here before you know it right Quoirra?"

"You can sleep on my lap so long as you promise not to drool, Kurosaki."

Ichigo glared at the green-eyed male before climbing into 'bed'

He turned his back to the wall hoping his 'cell-mates' would get the message and leave him the fuck alone!

He was so sick and tiered of being dragged along for one of Shiro's little projects or whatever.

Ichigo just wanted to escape-not forever but for a while.

Maybe after the party from hell was over on Friday he could catch a plane back to Mexico with Chado.

Possibly settle down and try to fall in love with a nice girl-key word is try since the idea of getting with another chick held no appeal whatsoever.

A guy then?

Yeah some nice young guy who didn't know who Ichigo was or where he had come from. Maybe he should even change his name?

Ichigo snorted at the thought.

Even if he tried that-it would only be a matter of time before either Shiro or Rukia tracked him down and-

"Ichigo it may not seem like it but everything that happened today I did it for you."

Ichigo rolled his eyes even though his cousin couldn't see it. "Don't think I'm going to forgive you just because you're trying to butter me up now."

He heard the powdered male sigh from behind him. "You're so tense all the time King, Quiorra and I just want you to lighten up and you know get in tune with the twinkle fairy in you."

"I'm not a damn twinkle fairy, Shiro!"

"Ya are King and I've never been more proud!" With these words, the golden eyed male hugged Ichigo from behind. "You know I love ya King and ya love me too."

"…"

The pathetic excuse for a bed creaked

"Tell me what's on your mind Ichigo?"

"I don't have to since you already know."

Another sigh, "Look King it may seem like I'm just trying to embarrass you but I'm not."

"Then what are you trying to do?" Ichigo turned his head away from the wall and towards his cousin.

Shiro grinned and held him tighter before responding with, "Can't have a proper coming out party without decent eye candy ya know."

"Eye candy?"

"Course, ya didn't think me and Quiorra would really let some random guys claim your ass for no reason did ya?"

"Well-

"Stupid King! I would never do that to ya."

Ichigo couldn't help the sigh that slipped past his lips when he felt the familiar sensation of fingers running through his hair.

"See, ya can always trust me King."

"I know."

"But ya know none of this would have happened if ya had just listened to me back then."

"I-you don't understand it-it's complicated Shiro."

"Complicated in what way King?"

"…"

"I'm trying to be nice here Ichigo but even with this unique talent of mine I still don't know everything. What the hell happened? Why did ya suddenly change ya mind?"

"I uh-Ichigo shook his head "Forget it. It's in the past and I don't want to-it doesn't matter." He repeated yet again.

"But it does matter, much as it irritates me even til this day-ya had it bad for him-to the point where it was almost unhealthy."

Ichigo flinched as though Shiro had suddenly stung him.

"Not that I haven't had my fair share of obsessions but-

"I said forget it Shiro I just-it-argg it is what it is. I don't care what he did then or what he's doing right now."

'And yet the very thought of him makes me want to grin like an idiot and crawl under a rock at the same time.'

"Look King ya can sit there and try and lie to me just like ya did back then or ya can tell me the real reason why you and Ruki-chan suddenly decided to play boyfriend/girlfriend during the last week right before your high school graduation."

"It was a mutual agreement. Rukia was trying to please her grandfather, the man was such a hard ass and-well anyway it was the best way."

"Hn then what about Orihime?"

"We set it up where I would come over while her brother and grandfather were around and then once they left Inoue would come over and her and Rukia would do well er whatever it is two chicks in a relationship do."

Shiro snorted. "It won't kill you to say it King."

This was true but at the same time Ichigo didn't feel comfortable talking about-

"Anyway once Rukia completed her first year of college she moved in with Inoue and-

"Wait a minute if that's true then why did they continue with the formalities for so long-I mean shouldn't those two-

"Erm you know I hate to interrupt but-

"Go away Quiorra I'm having brother bondin' with King right now."

"I would but I can not do that right now."

"Why the hell not?"

The irritation which had suddenly entered Shiro's tone was crystal clear.

"Because-

But Ulquiorra never had a chance to finish his sentence-or if he had Ichigo hadn't heard it-he'd fallen into yet another memory of the past.

Said memory was more painful rather than pleasant…

()()

FLASHBACK

_**House parties…**_

_That one occasion when stereotypes and cliques don't mean a damn thing because everyone just wants to have fun…is one way to put it…_

_Another would be…_

_Taking off your clothes and jumping into the swimming pool in your neighbors' backyard while said neighbor is on vacation._

_Getting so shit faced that you wake up with your head in the toilet and find out you're wearing chick clothes._

_Grabbing cookie trays from out of the cabinet and sliding down the stairs at a wild speed-your goal is to hit the cheap cans of beer lined up in a row but instead you wind up smashing your mom's priceless yet uber ugly vase and you freak out when you hear the door bell ring, thinking surely it must be the cops at the door._

_But it's just the band-and once you realize this you regain your aura of coolness._

_You're the guy who is hesitating right outside one of the spare bedroom doors, trying to get the up the courage to join the girl sitting on the bed inside the room-you ask your self 'are you really ready to lose the big V?'_

_Or maybe you're that one rare guy out of every million who has really only come here to pick up your intoxicated friend-such as the case with Ichigo._

_He has only agreed to come to this place because it has always been damn near impossible to say no to his friends._

_Plus the bond between him and Renji is still a bit shaky even though a whole year has passed since the tattooed redheads confession._

_Ichigo no longer feels guilty but irritated by the situation._

_Unrequited lust was nothing to cry over. Renji was being stupid!_

_Not that the redhead was crying exactly but that wasn't really the damn point._

_Rather it was more like the cherry pineapple seemed skittish might not be the proper word-but seriously what else would he call-_

_Ichigo's attention is pulled away from his thoughts and up to a line of people gathered single file-which appears to be leading down the stairs and into the basement._

_Curiosity getting the better of him he decides to find out what is going on._

_He already feels a bit uneasy for reasons he can't quite explain._

_Maybe because he's never seen so many redheads gathered at once. He doubts very few are natural, various hair dyes or wigs-which also irritates him._

_In addition all of the redheads are guys like him._

_The orange haired youth raises a brow before pushing his way through the line._

_He'll apologize later._

_()()()_

_It is not rocket science to figure out the scene that is being played out before him._

_Teenage guys such as himself only get down on their knees for two reasons-1) beg, 2) perform oral service._

_And there is nothing wrong with this except-_

_There is everything wrong with this picture._

_Because it is not a girl and her boyfriend but two guys- not just random guys-rather 2 guys that Ichigo knows very well. For there is no way he could ever mistake the unique bone structure of his rival or the bright red hair belonging to one of his best friends._

_Finding comfort in each other's arms?_

_Or could it be his rival has simply taken pity on his friend?_

_Either way Ichigo feels quite sick to his stomach. Especially when he remembers the line of redheads still waiting for their turns._

_To service a pompous wannabe King-his one and only rival Grimmjow!_

_As if the blue haired bastard hasn't done enough to make his life so damn-_

_Ichigo wants to scream until his voice goes hoarse-wants to kick the living shit out of both his cocky rival and his stupid friend!_

_This far surpasses jealousy and betrayal._

_Which is stupid because he never really had official claim on either one of them._

_And yet the more he thinks about it the more his anger rises._

_He knew his rival could be a dick-knew his rival was so obsessed with him but this?_

_Ichigo shakes his head._

_Why does he always act so stunned by the evil things his rival does?_

_Why is he so willing to make excuse after excuse for the bastard?_

_How the hell can his number one rival settle for a bunch of stand ins?_

_How the hell can his friend kneel there and degrade himself like that?_

_Wasn't he supposed to be having his wounds licked by the pepto prince or whatever?_

_Ichigo stops his train of thought for a moment at the low groan issuing from his rivals mouth-_

_He is fuming fucking furious at this point but not just with the two idiots going at like zoo sluts-at himself because he can feel the all too familiar tell tale signs of reddening cheeks and rising-_

_Yeah best not go there._

_Fuck what the hell is wrong with him?_

_He should not find anything about this scene even remotely-_

_And yet as it continues on-Ichigo begins to block out his friend and the moronic group of redheads on the stairs and just focuses on his rival-_

_A part of him really wants to just kill the guy! End all his troubles right here right now!_

_But another part-a part that has been haunting the orange haired youth for a good while now wishes that it was-_

_The sound of a door banging open followed by the sound-_

_"Grimm stop doing whatever the fuck it is your doing down there, ma just called she'll be home in like 30 minutes and you need to get off your ass and help me clean up this shit."_

_Ichigo looked at the top of the stairs-as far as he knew his rival didn't have any siblings plus principal Yamamoto also said that Grimmjow's mother had passed away so-_

_'Why the fuck should I care? I don't care what he d-_

_More fucking moans reached Ichigo's ears._

_Bastard probably getting off on the idea that 'ma' was on her way home._

_'Why the fuck am I still here. I need to leave-NOW!'_

_Ichigo has decided that he will call Rukia, she can come and pick up Renji's stupid ass-he's going to bed-or maybe he just won't go home at all but crash at Chado's or something._

_He doesn't know, doesn't care. But he cannot stay here any longer._

()()()

Ichigo is pulled away from his memories at the sound of techno music?


	5. CHAPTER 3 INTERMISSION 1

Disclaimer: BLEACH IS NOT OWNED BY SLY BUT KUBO-SENSEI NOW AND FOREVERMORE.

A/N I've decided that it's just so much fun to let Shiro and Ulquiorra out to play why not give them their own mini story. Ane-tiger agreed.

AU, OOC-NESS, WIP, LANGUAGE, TEASING, SPELLING, GRAMMAR, CROSS-DRESSING, ETC

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

I**NTERMISSION #1**

**Setting: Sunday night after Ichigo left Nel's baby shower. Shiro invited the orange berry over to his and Quiorra's house and Rukia and Orihime tagged along…**

**While the two ladies set to work on baking cherry pies in the kitchen the berry asks his cousin to tell him the story of how he met Ulquiorra**

**()()**

**Call it a filler if you want. I prefer to call it the missing bits from chapter 2**

**ENJOY!**

**Switches from 3****rd**** and 1****st**** POV**

When Shiro Met Quiorra

"_**Well as ya know King I was a bit of a rebel when I was younger, going into illegal or unknown territories, stirring up trouble, pushing my luck with authority figures. **_

_**Drove Kaa-chan crazy when I'd go out at all hours of the night and not return until dawn.**_

_**Only to go back out the door 4 hours later and try not to die of complete boredom as I sat through lecture after lecture inside the classroom.**_

_**Rancar Academy was nothin' like your lil' Gami High, we had twice the amount of homework and assholes. 'Course none of em' messed with me but that's not the point.**_

_**Anyway who cares about that, ya asked me when I met Quiorra not what I did during my high school years so lets flash- forward.**_

_**()**_

_**I had just turned 16 and was completely and utterly bored off my ass when I over heard a bunch of the upper classman talking about some new club that opened up in the next town over-rumor had it that the owner was an easy going kinda guy-all ya had to do was pay the door fee and he'd let ya in no matter what age ya were.**_

_**Naturally ya can imagine what I decided to do-thought about dragging you along but I figured ya would probably just lecture me on how it was wrong and would lead to nothin' but trouble so I left ya alone.**_

()

_**Hopped on my bike-the only time I used the damn thing-and tail-gaited Kira-sempai to the club.**_

_**Much to his annoyance not that I cared.**_

_**()**_

_**Flash forward again…**_

_**Tou-chan and Kaa-chan always said I had a certain aura of maturity around me-far surpassin' that of my peers and hell even half of Tou-chan's business partners. Musta been true cuz the bouncer didn't even give me a second glance when I walked to the front of the line.**_

'_**Course that might be because she was too busy checkin' out my ass but anyway there I w-**_

"If you're going to tell the story, then tell it correctly."

Golden eyes narrowed at the figure calmly licking low fat non-dairy ice cream off of his spoon.

"What have I told ya 'bout interruptin' me when I'm tellin' a story Quiorra."

Ichigo looked back and forth between Ulquiorra and his cousin, thinking that any minute now a fight would break out.

()()()

"_**So anyway there I was looking like the single hottest albino in existence knowing damn well that no other man could rock the fish net shirt, fingerless gloves and leather chaps like I did.**_

_**Catching the eye of both guys and girls-**_

_**Woulda went home with some of em' too if I hadn't admitted that I was underage-still didn't stop me from havin' a bit of fun-**_

Here Shiro smirked…

_**Ya know me King I'm not one to brag so when I say I was a natural I was a freakin natural-course with a tongue like mine was there ever any doubt?**_

_**Still even I had a thing or two to learn-turns out orgies aren't that uncommon-**_

Shiro shut his mouth when his lover glared at him just then-He cleared his throat

_**()()**_

_**Flashforward…**_

_**Didn't take much before I became a regular…I was like a freakin' celebrity, the manager himself was askin' me to come in every other Wednesday and Saturday night in addition to the Friday nights I usually went.**_

"This isn't a story Shiro, it's a bunch of fabricated lies combined with a series of grammatical errors."

"King don't give two shits 'bout grammatical errors Quiorra, so stop correctin' me!"

"It is not a matter of correcting you," Ulquiorra calmly stated "It is a matter of setting the record straight."

"Settin' the record straight ya call it? I'll give ya settin' the record straight," gold eyes flashed with what would clearly be identified as perverted intent-the powdered male leaned half his body across the table in order to grab the green eyed male by his jet black hair, pulling him into a fierce kiss.

Whether or not it was to shut Ulquiorra up or the fact that Shiro might secretly find it a turn on to be corrected by his lover, Ichigo did not know-nor did he really care he just wanted to hear the rest of the story.

"Look I don't care who tells it but can you kindly get on with it?"

The black-haired male was the one to break the kiss.

"Well Kurosaki in order to get to the official first encounter I must tell you what I was doing at the club in the first place."

()

_**My estranged uncle Shun was going out of town for a few weeks and so I was left in charge of his club.**_

_**The very first thing I did when he placed the keys in my hand was…**_

_**()()**_

_At 19 years of age Ulquiorra Shiffer felt that he far surpassed humanity (namely their intelligence or lack there of)_

_He had taken a year off from school and decided to venture over seas in order to reconnect with his estranged uncle Shun. It had been his mother's idea, the woman-despite raising the young man all his life with out any problems-felt that Ulquiorra needed a male role model in his life._

_Frankly Ulquiorra hadn't had any desire to go at first-didn't think he could learn much from a man who wore long floral printed robes which were clearly meant and designed for women, drank himself under the table day and night and gambled half of his life savings away._

_()_

"Booooring, get to the part when you c-

"Quiet Shiro! You cannot rush a good thing."

Ichigo snorted. Sometimes the couple was really just-

"But King doesn't care about-

Ulquiorra let out a resigned sigh. "Fine we will agree on a compromise then. I will tell half of the story and you will tell half of the story," green eyes flashed "Don't leave out any details!"

And then a moment or two later he smiled and Ichigo found it rather disturbing. "You know on second thought why don't I jus-

()

"_I'll be back at the end of the month. If you have any questions ask Nanao-chan."_

_Ridiculous. As if Ulquiorra would ask a woman anything about club management._

"_This is not necessary. As I am sure my mother must have informed you countless times-(heavens above how he hated to constantly repeat himself) I led an entire baseball team to three consecutive victories, co-managed a dance studio and am adapt in well over 6 languages."_

'_So running a little night club is a walk in the park.'_

_Shunsui laughed. "Good, good then I guess there is really nothing left for me to do but call in the troops."_

_Ulquiorra raised a brow. "Troops?"_

_The man with wavy hair took a few swigs from his flask before wiping his mouth on his robe. _

_After a round of belching he went towards the door and bellowed out a string of long and semi-slurred words which Ulquiorra translated as 'It's time to meet and greet your new manager' or something along these lines._

_()()_

_50 men and about 13 women crashed into the office-their breaths reeking of alcohol, morning breath and something so entirely unpleasant Ulquiorra felt he would surely faint if he had to be around it a minute more._

_Rubbing the sides of his temples he made a quick assessment of the staff._

_Sloppy, undressed and overpaid._

'_Oh no this will never do.'_

_And so with this thought in mind Ulquiorra stepped forward and addressed each individual in turn-giving each man and woman 5 minutes tops to state their reason for being here and why they felt that they deserved to stay._

_Only 8 passed._

_()()_

"Wait! Back up you expected 8 people to run an entire club?"

"Don't be thick headed Kurosaki. I made a few calls and 24 hours later a crowd of over 200 had gathered in the hopes of landing a position at _**Mountain Spear."**_

"Yeah and it just so happened that I knew one of the guys. Shawlong, real asshole, didn't have much of a personality-actually he didn't have much of anything that interested me but he was good for one thing."

Ichigo hesitated to ask "What?"

Shiro smirked. "Sure ya wanna know King?"

"It's only a matter of time before you tell me anyway so might as well do it now."

"His mom was a retired actress on that old day time drama Dancin' with Shinobi' so she had connections."

"What kind of connections? Where exactly are you going with this Shiro?"

"…"

"Come on and tell me already?"

"I don't know King are ya sure ya ca-

"Surely even _you _have heard of fake ID's Kurosaki?" 

The powdered males' former smirk turned into a scowl. "Damn it Quiorra I wanted to say it!"

Ulquiorra dipped his spoon back into his non-fat, non-dairy ice cream bowl before raising it to his lips once again-seeming completely unfazed with the evil eye his lover was now giving him.

Ichigo couldn't help himself he was a little bit amused.

"Think that's funny King then you're gonna love the next part of the story…

()()

_Flashforward…_

_**It was mid may and I had just gotten over a nasty spring time flu-thought to myself what was the best way to get back in the swing of things?**_

_**Why waltz my happy ass over to my favorite club of course.**_

_()_

_**It was around 4:30pm in the afternoon. I had come straight from school to find out if the rumors I had been hearing all day were in fact true.**_

_**Sure enough…**_

()()()

_Hands shoved in his pockets Shiba Shiro bounced from one foot to the other._

_Golden eyes narrowed as he reread the sign once more just to make sure he hadn't misunderstood-_

_Black painted lips curled into a nasty snarl _

"_What the fuck is this shit? What new management?"_

_He started pounding on the door-knowing damn well that someone had to be inside since it was already 4:30pm and the club opened at 5:00pm._

"_Hey __you__ bring ya ass out here and tell me what the fuck is goin' on. I'm a payin' customer and I expect some answers!"_

"_What good will yelling and pounding on the door do when no one is inside?"_

_Shiro turned at the sound of the familiar voice. It was none other than the female bouncer Sungsun. He almost didn't recognize her since she had cut her olive green colored hair and was wearing jeans-_

"_Sungsun ya look different."_

"_Shiffer-san does not think it is right for a woman such as myself to go around in such tight and revealing clothes when the men cover up everything-so Shiffer-san decided to turn the tables._

_Women wear jeans and men wear skirts-it's actually quite amusing."_

"_Shiffer-san eh?" Shiro snorted._

_Shiffer-san. Yeah he could picture now-some stuffy old woman from overseas._

"_When did the switch happen?"_

"_Only a few short weeks ago," Sungsun explained, "Most of the employees protested but I myself," she smiled delicately "I have a great deal of respect for Shiffer-san."_

"_Hn, that so? Well guess since I'm here I might as well get a drink or two._

_Shiro made a move to grab the door handle but Sungsun blocked him._

"_The club doesn't open until 9:00pm and the bar," she lowered her eyes "I'm sorry Shiro but you're under age."_

_WTF?_

'_Since when does my age matter?'_

_Shiro wasn't the type to create a scene. He moved close to Sungsun and whispered in her ear "I'll just grab a quick drink from the bar and go, no one has to know, it can be our little secret."_

_The older woman shivered with delight and then moved to the side, letting the proud bino-berry pass._

_Shiro smirked. 'Works every time.'_

_()()_

"I would like to be the one to point out at this time that had I known you were out there seducing Sungsun during her shift, she would have been fired."

Ichigo couldn't help but think that was a little unfair.

Ulquiorra noticed the way the orange haired male frowned. "Problem Kurosaki?"

"Just because Shiro is a shameless flirt does not mean the woman should be punished."

Bottle green eyes narrowed. "A business will not flourish with a limp hand, Kurosaki. Something you should keep in mind if you plan to pursue your dream of becoming a screen writer."

Shiro snickered, "A limp anythin' is never good, King."

The orange berry flushed a lovely crimson color and then kicked his powdered cousin under the table.

Shiro retaliated by moving his hand towards Ichigo's crotch and palming the clothed flesh.

Ichigo couldn't exactly let it be known that the powdered male was touching him what with Ulquiorra being right there in the room and all. He felt like it would be betraying the dark-haired male in some way.

So instead he just kicked the bino-male even harder.

"At least finish the story before you start molesting the boy, Shiro."

Ichigo jumped.

Surprised to find that Ulquiorra A) seemed to already know and B) did not seem to care.

Shiro paid no mind to Ulquiorra's lectures-nor the orange haired male's protests-he much rather continue to find out just how far he could go-

Black painted finger nails moved towards the zipper, pausing just for a moment, waiting for his green-eyed love to resume the tale of how they met.

"I take everything I do in life very seriously. I will not settle for mediocre performances. I expect better than the best and grander than grand.

()()

_**My mother was flying in from out of town and she was bringing my two bratty half sisters, Loly and Menoly along with her.**_

_**They wished to see the club and I agreed because well..there is very little I would ever deny the woman who gave birth to me.**_

_**But as I am sure even a space cadet like yourself can conclude, Mountain Spear wasn't exactly a family friendly establishment so I had to make a few more changes.**_

_**One of my employees was being rather difficult…**_

_**()()**_

"_My fans expect me each and every night, 365 days out of the year and now you're telling me that I have to reschedule because your mother is in town? How dare you! How dare you try to stomp on my para-_

_Ulquiorra did not change his blank facial expression as he interrupted the effeminate Prussian blue-haired male currently throwing a tantrum inside his office._

_Because at the end of the day Yumichika was one of his best stars._

_But Ulquiorra was a business man and he could not afford to waste time._

"_2 weeks vacation with pay. On the night of your return I will have your new schedule posted-in addition you will find something that is sure to be to your liking in your dressing room."_

_The man cocked a feathered brow. "Meaning?"_

"_You will find out when you return," Ulquiorra answered before he pointed to the door. "You are free to go. Have a good vacation."_

_()()_

"What? And just like that he walked?"

"Why do you sound so surprised, Kurosaki?"

"Well it's just uh-

Damn it was rather difficult to focus when his cousin still hadn't stopped with his-

"Quiorra can be very convincin' with out even tryin'-Shiro's voice was teasing as he took the final plunge and slipped his hand inside Ichigo's briefs-but since ya brought it up not all surprises are bad."

Ichigo was turning beet red by now and again he asked himself why didn't Ulquiorra seem to care.

As if sensing his inner battle/monologue the green eyed spoke up "We discussed it on the way over."

"Discussed what?"

Green eyes glittered "Shiro would get to play with your lovely jewels so long as I get to play with your rosy bud before this night reaches a close."

Okay seriously why was Ichigo just sitting here and letting this-?

"Anyway there will be plenty of time for play later let's get back to the story…

()()

_**So upon entering the club I noticed a few things 1) I didn't recognize much of anything, the bar, dance floor-hell even the busboy-it was a lot like bein' a stranger in a strange land**_

_**()**_

"You once again are stalling, Shiro."

Shiro stopped molesting Ichigo long enough to glare at his green eyed lover yet again.

"_**In the past I was a regular and everyone one freakin' adored me-I could do whatever I wanted-for example pouring my own drinks and-**_

"I still can't believe you put your mouth on the nozzle."

Shiro grinned. "That's when it taste best-'sides there are far worse things one can do in life," eyes glittered "Like go to bathhouses for example."

It was kind of strange to see Ulquiorra turn almost as red as Ichigo himself had turned just then.

"Is t-there anything you guys haven't done?"

"There's always something new and exciting to learn, King."

"If you'd like you can join us on one of our adventures, Kurosaki."

"Ya bet he will-just as soon as he loosens up his bod-King'll love ta join us right?"

"Uh well-

"Anyway where was I-

"Something about nozzles I think?"

"_**Right so there I was chuggin' back some sort of uber expensive beverage-not that I'm a heavy drinker but there's somethin' to be said 'bout imported drinks ya know?**_

_**()**_

"_I found him with half his body twisted, lips covering the beer nozzle, had to mentally slap myself when I was rewarded with a glimpse of his behind-thinking how lovely it wa-ah who am I kidding Shiro's ass is nearly as luscious as yours Kuros-_

"_**That's cuz Quiorra can't get enough of me in a thong-**_

_**Course at the time he was too busy bitchin' about how my perfect sexy self was smudgin' and scoffin' his freshly washed bar top. I only listened with half an ear since I was far more interested in the way the beer was soakin' into his emerald green silk dress shirt-I'm tellin' ya right now King, Quiorra's nipples are better than any chicks! The way they harden-always told im' he should get em' pierced."**_

Ulquoirra cleared his throat…

()()

"_**I was above and beyond furious-all I could think was some young punk just waltzed right into my club, practically molested my bar and sprayed beer on one of my favorite shirts-all the while wearing the most infuriating cocky smirk, licking his black-cherry painted lips as he gave me a thrice over-**_

_**When he dared to reach out and touch a lock of my hair which had fallen out of it's loose braid, I grabbed him by his powdered head and watched as he winced (thinking at the time it was out of pain-only to discover down the line that it was one of delight)**_

_**()()**_

_Normally Ulquiorra would not resort to such barbaric behavior as physical violence but the powdered pink was trying his patience._

"_I admit my memory ain't always the greatest but if ya t-_

_Fingers pinched Shiro's lips together-effectively silencing the youth. _

"_You will not speak another word. Nor make another sound. But here is what you will do: You will get your butt off my counter, walk to the exit door, get back on your little bike or whatever form of transportation you used to come here and you will never return again."  
_

_()()_

_Naturally being who he was, Shiro didn't just obey the command, rather he licked the palm which had covered his mouth and snickered when the black-haired male pulled his hand back-eyes growing wide-acting as though he had been burned._

_It was comical. Shiro wished to see more but he decided he'd return later-for now he would leave calmly, an extra spring in his step._

_()()_

"_**Over the next few weeks I returned to the club night after night only to find that the place was heavily guarded with police officers and their dogs.**_

_**Didn't take a genius to figure out that Quiorra was avoidin' me.**_

_**Probably figured he couldn't concentrate if I was near by so he went out of his way to make sure I'd stay away from him.**_

_**Course that didn't stop me from puttin' a new plan into action**_

_**()**_

_**A little over a month had gone by when it finally came to me…**_

_**()**_

_**It was after club hours and I decided to follow Quiorra to his car-without warning I pressed my body up against his and bent him over the hood of his car-licking at the shell of his ear with my freshly pierced tongue-**_

_**Lovin' the way his pale, smaller muscled body shivered under my touch-didn't even have ta use my hands ta get the message across-**_

_**Told him that it might not be on that night, might not be the next but there would come a time when I would come for him and he better get his sweet ass prepared!**_

_**()()**_

"I will admit it only because I trust that these words will not leave this room isn't that correct, Kurosaki?"

"King's lips are sealed-I'll make sure of it!"

Ulquiorra seemed satisfied enough with Shiro's words and resumed the tale.

()()

_**After he cornered me in the parking lot I admit I felt rather skittish from that moment on-couldn't even bathe properly-had to make sure I kept one eye opened. He could appear at anytime-**_

_**()()**_

'_**Course I wasn't a complete idiot-couldn't just follow Quiorra home-risk him callin' the cops and havin' a restrainin' order against me and all that-nah I bided my time.**_

_**()**_

_**And I did appreciate him waiting because it made me realize something about myself.**_

_**But we won't go into that at this time.**_

_**()()**_

_**Flashforward…year or two went by. Once again I grew tiered of playin' the stalker level 1 routine and decided it was time to do somethin' else.**_

_**Plus I missed im'**_

_**()**_

_**Under the guise of a woman. I entered the club wearing a white blond-wig and brown contacts, dressed in a cherry red corset with a black mini-skirt, fish net tights and 6 inch heels. Introduced my self as Shiori, an up and coming fashion model from Cero Magazine.**_

_**Said I was lookin' for a lil company and a good time-nothin' special.**_

_**()()**_

_**I was fuckin' pissed when the bartender informed me that Quiorra was off for the night and woulda spent the night sulkin' if lady humor hadn't decided to intervene.**_

_**()()**_

_**Perhaps I myself had had a bit too much to drink earlier that same afternoon or perhaps I just wanted to step away from being Ulquiorra for awhile-and if fate would allow me to stop and chat with the powdered male whose gold eyes were haunting my dreams every night-well  
()**_

_**Like with most thing-the transformation was quite easy.**_

_**I had done a bit of acting in between early highschool years-some times I was required to dress as a woman-**_

_**()()**_

_**Think ya can see where this is headin' King.**_

_**Turned out Quiorra and I had the same idea. Gotta admit still brings a grin to my face til' this day-Quiorra was so damn delish when he removed his mink fur coat and revealed the back-less emerald green velvet dress and matching shoes-**_

()()()

"So what you're tellin' me is dressing in drag is what finally brought the two of you together?"

Ulquiorra and Shiro shared twin smirks and then turned back to the berry.

"We will tell you the rest when you're older."

END

CHAPTER FOUR OF DRUNKEN SEAHORSE…COMING SOMETIME LATER THIS MONTH

THANKS FOR READING

~SLY~


	6. Chapter FOUR

Disclaimer: If Kubo-sensei ever became as distracted as I do BLEACH would have been canceled…oh the horror, I am not Kubo-sensei and I don't own BLEACH!

A/N So here it is almost spring, 2 days before my birthday and I come to find that I am still far behind on so many of my fics, this one included, sighs.

For Ane-chan: Because she'll never give up on this cougar even if everyone else does!

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, Spelling, Grammar, Punctuation, switching views, flashbacks which do not follow a certain order or pattern, nudity, crack, humor, etc…

GrimmxIchi, OthersIchi, GrimmOthers, ShiroxQuiorra, RukixHime, SzaxRen, tba…

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**(ICHIGO)**

_Now that the fun little intermission with Shiro and Ulquiorra is over we can jump back into to our main story. Not much has changed. Ichigo is still sulking inside the jail cell feeling bitter about the past when the sound of thumping beats a lot like techno music reaches his ears and grabs his attention._

Never one to have mastered the art of meditation and focusing his energy entirely on himself Ichigo turns and brown eyes grow comically wide at the sight being played out.

It is not Shiro and Ulquiorra that are responsible for extracting such a reaction from him but the other occupants in the jail cell next to them.

Shirtless with pants hanging low on their hips, both wearing wide grins, beady black eyes dark with lust focused on him and HIM alone as they move their half naked bodies along with the music, practically making love to the metal bars.

And Ichigo wonders if he might have missed something somewhere in between glaring at the wall and getting caught up in the past.

He wonders if he might have fallen asleep and this is some type of weird erotic dream better suited for a porno rather than real life.

Because honestly who the hell ever heard of techno music being played in a jail cell anyway?

Even if there were a slight chance that the security guard was laid back of all the music genres to choose from techno would not be it.

Still…Ichigo realizes he might just have to shut up and face facts-reality is sometimes weird.

Nnoitra is the first one to speak "We've talked it over and got it all figured out now, pet."

Long and bony but oddly graceful looking fingers start a trail down a wide and well-muscled chest, pausing momentarily on a narrow waistline before continuing down wards-fingers on the zipper-pulling down-

Ichigo averted his gaze and then scowled at the snicker that followed.

"Cute pet, real c-(A slammming noise was heard followed by a snarling hiss "YOU FUCKIN' ASSHOLE!"

Curious though he might have been to find out who or what had hurt Nnoitra Ichigo did not turn his eyes back to the scene until...

"Your ass is just too damn pretty to ignore and I'm horny enough to fuck a beehive right now, get over here!"

Kenpachi's raspy command-Ichigo couldn't help it-it was impossible to ignore though heaven help him he did try

But now completely having lost control over his body Ichigo is sliding off the cheap piece of shit called a mattress and making his way over to the sexy dark haired duo.

If this is in fact reality then he might as well make the most of it right?

On his knees he crawled to them (knowing in the back of his mind that what he was doing was completely against his character)

He pressed his face up against the bars and shuddered as Nnoitra and Kenpachi finished their little speech

"We're gonna mount you at the same time and fill ya to the brim."

"How's that sound Ichigo?"

Ichigo was very close to letting out a mewl or a purr or some other uber embarrassing non-masculine sound when a strong set of blunt nails and a dead pan tone pulled him back to his senses "Forget about them and come and play with me, Kurosaki."

Sharp teeth nipped at his left ear and even though the voice was lacking normal human emotion, even though the voice didn't carry a growling purr type sound, Ichigo fell back into Ulquiorra's touch and crash landed into another memory...

_**FLASHBACK**_

_No school year is complete without a dance though why anyone would put Miss Mashiro in charge well...Ichigo was beginning to question the sanity of the principal and the rest of the staff members._

_**(**__**We still have three spaces left so drop by the dance hall and sign up to become part of the FLASH PANTS Experience)**_

_**()**_

'_**Flash pants? Really that's a little bold even for eccentric type like Miss Mashiro.'**__ Thought Ichigo as he noticed the too shiny and sparkly flyer posted on the bulletin board in the hallway._

_A light honey-cream toned hand reach up and grabbed the flyer-a girlish squeal of excitement followed "She posted it! She posted it! Finally she was hinting at it for weeks and finally, finally it's happening."_

_Ichigo turned to his friend not at all surprised that she was practically ready to do cartwheels at the mention of a dance. _

"_This is going to be so much fun, come on Kurosaki-kun let's go round up Kuchiki-san and the others and become part of the Flash Pants Committee."_

_Ichigo opened his mouth fully intending to let the brunette down lightly when-a flash of red caught his eye-_

_"No can do Hime-chan, Ichigo and I got practice."_

_"Ah!" the princess cried out in surprise and then wagged her index finger at the redhead, scolding him "Renji-kun what have I told you about sneaking up on me like that? What if I accidentally smacked you with one of my pompoms and you lost your balance, fell down the stairs and woke up ten days later not knowing who you are or where you were? I'd never be able to forgive myself."_

_Ichigo raised a brow but chose not to comment on Inoue's overdramatic response and imagination._

"_Oh Hime-chan you worry too much I'm-the rest of Renji's sentence faded out when a flash of blue caught Ichigo eye through the reflection of the plate glass window behind them._

_He turned _

_After a month away it seemed his long lost rival had finally returned looking taller and more arrogant then ever-not only was he flanked by the two Grantz twins but 3 unknown chicks dressed in skin tight crop tops, neon colored skirts and matching brown uggs who were practically falling and fawning all over the blue haired male._

_Ichigo had never seen the girls before so he concluded that they were from Grimmjow's home country-CANADA._

_The tallest looking chick had a possessive hand curled around his rivals left arm (which was sporting a rather painful looking scar) _

'_**Wonder how and when that happened?'**_

_His rival wasn't the kind of guy who easily bruised or was caught off guard-_

_Whoever had done it must have distracted Grimmjow before delivering the blow-assuming it was a scar resulting from a fight that is._

_It could also be an accidental burn-not that his rival was clumsy but things happened-maybe he rammed his arm into an oven or something?_

_Or maybe?_

_Maybe the teenagers over in Canada led double lives? What if his rival was actually a hero who had rescued a family of 6 from a burning building or something?_

_Either way it didn't matter point here was rather than being disgusted or turned off Ichigo just wanted to knock the fuckin' leech to the side and press his lips to the raised flesh._

_He shook his head banishing such thoughts and then turned back to his friends._

_"No."_

_"Oh but you must," Inoue insisted in that sweet yet headache inducing voice of hers, "Kuchiki-san told me you're a good dancer."_

_Ichigo scowled. "I don't know where Rukia got that Idea but just because I was forced-key word here is __forced__-to take a few classes at a dance studio 2 summers ago doesn't mean I enjoy doing it."_

_"You were? Really? How come you never mentioned it before Ichigo?"_

_Ichigo's scowl deepened "Because it was stupid and pointless and I was doing a favor for my mothers other brother."_

_"What? Really? You never told me you had another unc-_

_Ichigo shrugged, "That's because no one really talks about him much-let alone likes him-he's not quite right in the head and-_

_"Oh he doesn't sound so bad-any man who has a passion for dance is a good person in my book."_

_"No offense Hime-chan but a beggar on the street is a good person in your book."_

_"He wasn't a beggar he was a street performer, two very different things Renji-kun."_

_"Anyway," Ichigo cut in on his friends bickering "It was a long time ago and I barely remember any of the steps anyway."_

_"That's not what Kon said when I asked him why you stopped dancing."_

_The trio turned at the new comer, cries of "Rukia/Kuchiki-san!" coming out of their mouths._

_Rukia grinned at the group and then continued, "Kon says you haven't really stopped dancing-you just refuse to do it in front of others but you're not as discreet as you think you are because he's caught you doing it more than once-_

_"I-_

_Try as he might Ichigo could not quite fight off the blush fast enough_

_"And don't even try to deny it because I've seen the pictures," an all too familiar gleam entered Rukia's silver-blue eyes._

_"Pictures? Really oooh Kuchiki-san you'll let me see them won't you, pretty, pretty please?"_

_Rukia did not comment as Inoue rested her head on one of her thin shoulders-and once again Ichigo wondered if the relationship between his two female friends was simply platonic or-_

_Renji draped an arm over his shoulder just then but Ichigo didn't think much of it-completely missed the looks that passed between the redhead and the two girls-missed as reddish brown eyes softened at the thought of being close to his favorite orange berry._

_"Now that the cats outta the bag, care to show me some of your moves Ichigo?"_

_Why the hell was Renji grinning at him like that?_

_Ichigo responded by elbowing his tattooed friend in the gut and then rolling his eyes when Renji fell down and started whining about how he was "Wounded and only a strawberry angel could heal him" never mind that said strawberry angel was the one to 'injure' him in the first place_

_Ichigo's cheeks turning even redder "Knock it off idiot!"_

_Rukia giggled and Inoue moved to help the redhead to his feet._

_Even if it was mostly meant in jest and Renji wasn't really injured the buxom cheerleader could never stand to see another person hurt._

_Ichigo frowned, a bit of guilt suddenly creeping up on him. "Come on Renji stop pretending-I barely grazed you a-_

_This time it was Ichigo who went crashing to the floor as his redheaded friend literally lunged at him and thus began the daily routine of scuffling between friends._

_()()_

_Ichigo's happy mood was dimmed a the sound of "Smile for the cameras boys, if you're going to insist on groping one another right here in the hallways you might as well share, share, share with the rest of the student body."_

_FLASH! FLASH! FLASH_

_Ichigo and Renji quickly scrambled to their feet-although Ichigo noticed that the tattooed redhead was moving at a much more leisurely pace as if he honestly didn't care what the out loud and proud lezzie thought of them._

_And Ichigo supposed Renji might have a point since_

_Hell knowing Chizuru she was probably cheering them on-not that there was anything to cheer because he and Renji were just friends, kind of like brothers. _

_He couldn't help but think that it was incredibly unfair that Inoue and Rukia could cling to one another and no one would think anything of it but if he even sat too close to one of his fellow guy friends that automatically made him a fruit-not that there was anything wrong with being a fruit except that their was EVERYTHING WRONG WITH IT ACCORDING TO MOST OF SOCIETY._

_Not that he really gave a damn about what society thought-or at least he tried not to anyway._

_Sometimes he wished for a much simpler kind of life-desperately wished to be normal-after all he didn't really fall into the flaming fruit category when he never even dared to act on one of his fantasies-_

_He tried to look at it from a logical stand point-fantasies were just that fantasies-just because someone thought about murdering some one did not necessarily mean they'd follow through-it was just the anger-the build up of emotion talking-_

_Instead of beating himself over and over thinking 'UNPURE' thoughts Ichigo should look for distractions-_

_He should just wean himself of all things fruit tastic and ask Nel out on a date. _

_They could do the standard movie and popcorn deal-during the boring scenes he could pretend to yawn and put his arm around her, then catch her off guard while she was distracted by sipping on her lime flavored soda, lower his voice to a seductive purr that he wasn't even sure he was capable of pulling off and he'd lean in to kiss her-_

_Only could he kiss her? _

_Maybe if he shut his eyes and pretended that the locks he was curling around his fingers were wild electric blue rather than amazon seagreen-maybe as he put his arms around her waist he could imagine that it was hard and well muscled rather than soft and curvaceous-_

_But wouldn't that defeat the entire purpose?_

_He was supposed to be drowning such thoughts not embracing them. _

_Plus if word got out that he simply asked Nel out but had no real romantic interest in her well things could get ugly and Ichigo had never been a fan of drama so he'd really rather avoid that route at all costs._

_Maybe he could approach a different girl-a studious type perhaps? _

_The kind of girl that wouldn't even think about things like a quick dry humping session behind the back alley of the movie theater-she probably wouldn't even watch movies unless they were strictly educational-he could carry her books, walk her poodle while she was away at her pottery lessons-ask her to the dance?_

_Yes the dance-if he got a date for a dance all of his problems would be solved right?_

_Once he had a soft, sexy and warm body in his arms all thoughts of his rival would never even think of entering his mind-_

_Hell Grimmjow wouldn't even exist on his radar-he could picture it now-well to a certain extent anyway- he could get a girl to be his date but what if his rival did the same thing?_

_What if the blue-haired bastard actually fell for one of those flimsy floozy's who followed him back from his hometown?_

_What if Grimmjow and his date for the night were the hottest couple on the dance floor? What if Ichigo couldn't keep his eyes off the bastard and wound up stepping on his own dates toes? What if his rival did more than dance?_

_In the end Ichigo would probably wind up abandoning his date in favor of heading to the back parking lot where he would spray paint crude and obscene messages on Grimmjow's car-or maybe he would slip in through the sunroof of the vehicle and rub his body all over the expensive leather interior? _

_Then leave a lil note 'A lil somethin' to remember me by' signed ANONStrawberry_

_Oh but why stop there-he should take it one step further and leave his sticky-cum filled boxer briefs right on Grimmjow's dashboard or better yet his sterling wheel?_

_Picturing his rival being such a kinky bastard and all-_

_He would find the whole thing rather amusing would 'order' his date to slip the soiled material on in place of her own panties-which were probably lacy with little ribbons and cost more than Ichigo made in a year at his part time job as a grocer. _

_She would turn up her nose but agree because who could say no to a sexy and arrogant bastard like his rival?_

_Said rival would have grown bored by then and just went ahead and yanked the little sluts panties in half and-_

_Wait! What? Why the hell was he seriously considering such a scenario?_

_More importantly why the hell was Grimmjow's co-star some cheap blonde floozy-he should be the co-star-him and him alone._

_Yes a much better scenario would be-following the little whore into the girls bathroom and drowning her head in the toilet bowl, he'd reach into the pocket of his cellphone and dial 9, 1 and then 1 again, once his role as a good citizen was complete he would set out to find his rival._

_()()_

_Yes he wound find the bastard out by his car in the parking lot-a slightly damp cigarette in between camel colored lips-_

_As if sensing his approach because some how Grimmjow always knew when Ichigo appeared even when the berry didn't announce his arrival-that infuriating cocky grin would make its way on to the blue haired males face._

"_Come to keep me company Strawberry Princess?"_

_And because Ichigo was so much more smooth and laid back in his daydreams he would approach his rival with a aura of coolness that could put the greatest rock star to shame-_

_Because it was a daydream Ichigo would let go of his inhibitions-ignore all his conflicted thoughts and just go ahead and take what he wanted._

_He would start with an indirect lip lock._

_()()_

_Rudely ripped from his daydreams at the sound of a-_

_"Come on Ichigo you know what coach said, one more tardy and he'll put us on the bench."_

_The bench hmm Ichigo had never given the bench much thought before...a bench a single bench could lead to a great deal of fun couldn't it? Depending upon how one used it?_

_He'd bet his left butt cheek that his rival knew how to make use of a bench-the smooth, solid surface of an every day-_

_His redheaded friend may not have gotten through to him but the sound of the bell ringing certainly did._

_()()_

_He wasn't really disappointed that his rival had apparently decided to skip out on track was he?_

_Well maybe just a little bit._

_After all next to Ichigo himself, Grimmjow was the only one who understood that running wasn't just about beating the guy in front or next to you, wasn't just about winning._

_And yet the bastard whose been absent for a whole freakin' month suddenly decides he's not gonna show-he's not going to make himself useful and give Ichigo the kind of competition the thrill of adrenaline which the berry has missed and craved _

_Not that Renji was a lazy runner exactly-it was just well his friend tended to get distracted a lot by who or what Ichigo did not know-but that wasn't the point!_

_His friend had nothing to do with his irritation at the moment. No it was his so called rival-_

_His so called rival it seems much rather spend time with his new slut bag groupies-yes, yes Ichigo can just picture it right now-_

_The group had not snuck into a closet because his rival is far too good for such a tightly cramped space-how can the king perform in poor or zero lighting?_

_No he will take his giggling slut bag groupies outside-the school roofs perhaps near the fire escape-_

_Yes because the little twat will need something to hold on to while her king is ramming into her from behind and the other two twats will make themselves useful by putting on a good show for their king because after all he needs visual stimulus to further excite him-_

_()()_

"_**Yeah that's it move those legs, go ahead and give me a good show, remind me of what I missed while I was gone." **_

_Wait how did a vision of his rival's sexcapades suddenly turn into a fantasy about Grimjow talking dirty to him?_

_Wow his daydreams were becoming more and more realistic each time around-he could swear _

"_Hike up those shorts a little higher and let me get a good look at those glistening thighs I can tell their turning red along with every other part of your sinful lil' body, strawberry princess."_

_Wait! What?_

_It was one thing for his rival to come up from behind him and whisper such words in this ear it was quite another for Grimmjow to-_

_Ichigo stopped running and searched the area._

_No sign of his rival but the voice was loud and crystal clear which meant-_

_He looked up and brown eyes narrowed at the tiny tower way on the other side of the field. How the hell had the bastard managed to get up to the radio station in the first place?_

_Footsteps, hurried footsteps and then a clap on his shoulder _

"_Ichigo what's up? Why did you suddenly stop running?"_

_It wasn't only Renji who had noticed but the rest of his teammates as well-_

_Ichigo fought down the blush that threatened to overcome him and sincerely hoped that everyone had temporarily gone deaf and not heard Grimmjow's voice just now._

_Laughter reached his ears_

"_Looks like Grimm's not wastin' anytime in claiming the first piece of ass he comes across upon his grand return."_

_More laughter followed by howling and wolf whistles_

"_Bastard's so damn excited he didn't even tell the lil' women to turn off the speakers."_

"_Lil woman-whose up there exactly?"_

"_Didn't you hear-he said strawberry princess so obviously he's talking about-_

"_Ladies you're not going to win the race on Saturday by simply standing around gossiping, get off your ass and move or I'll move it for you!"_

_Ichigo let out a sigh of relief-glad that his teammates were pretty fuckin' dumb yet at the same time-what if Grimmjow really did have somebody up there?_

_He racked his brain trying to think of what girl with red or pink hair might be with his rival at this moment in time-only one person came to mind- S-_

"_You too Kurosaki, don't think you can slack off just because you're the star runner. Move it!"_

_()()_

_Being cornered in the locker room wasn't exactly a new occurrence-Ichigo had experienced this once before only he had a feeling things were going to play out a bit differently this time around._

_He had the upper advantage because he had seen Grimmjow coming through the reflection in the mirror._

_Why there was a mirror in the boys' locker room?_

_Ichigo really rather not know but that was not the point-_

_Ichigo wasn't as nearly naïve as he had once been-if his rival made a move he'd be ready with the counter._

_Or so he thought right up until both of Grimmjow's hands slammed on both sides of his locker-effectively boxing Ichigo in._

_And at this moment in time, the orange haired youth thought, that it was a hell of a lot easier to keep a clear head when he didn't have to worry about shielding his manhood from his rivals eyes-yes because this time around Ichigo had been quick to pull up his pants and zip them before the bastard approached him._

_Score one for the orange berry!_

_Yes it was much, much easier to keep his breathing even and act like the close proximity didn't even faze him._

_But of course due to his rotten luck-Ichigo felt his 'act of nonchalance and cool and breezy' quickly slip away when a finger (not his own) started a light, teasing and feather light trail beginning at the back of his ear and moving all the way down to waistline of his pants and then back up again before removing itself completely._

"_A little blue bird tells me you were askin' about me, wonderin' where I've been-said you were startin' to think I might never return."_

_Grinning wider than the damn Cheshire cat-he would admit only to himself-he had missed that grin-_

_Yes Ichigo had missed Grimmjow's grin, missed the way the sharp angles became further exaggerated as perfect pearly whites stretched-missed the way those out of this world electric blues seemed to jump start his heart-but above all the rest was the growling purr which was totally and completely non-human._

_In the privacy of his own thoughts and Ichigo liked to think quite a lot he imagined for a moment or two or ten what life in his rivals' shoes would be like. _

_He wondered if he became Grimmjow would he suddenly develop that certain royal flair which none could ever dream to replicate-he wondered if he were Grimmjow would he feel attraction for a scowling blushing berry?_

_Wait a minute! Wasn't Ichigo getting a little bit ahead of himself? Sure his rival looked at him for longer than necessary and sure his rival had made plenty of less than platonic advances towards him during the time that they crossed paths, butted heads and so on but wasn't it just a little bit egotistical for him to assume that Grimmjow was equally attracted to him as he was to Grimmjow. _

_First and far most his rival was a major flirt-in addition the kind of guy who enjoyed getting others riled up-although it seemed the bastard got the most satisfaction out of riling him up so maybe?_

"_You disappoint me Kurosaki, here I was expectin' you'd at least slap my hand or punch me for touching you but all you've been doing for the last 15 minutes is starin' off in to space. Or could it be that you've simply forgotten how to open your mouth and speak or," here another grin "You don't trust yourself enough right now because you fear you might just say something that you aren't quite ready to come to terms with?_

_A pause and then "Which is it?"_

_Now a year ago or less Ichigo would have responded with a colorful insult or two-followed by his fist connecting with Grimmjows' face-at this very moment however Ichigo simply did not have the desire to be violent although he probably should at least demand to know why A) The bastard decided to leave with out telling him in the first place B) He decided to almost humiliate him at practice C) He had skipped out on practice in the first place._

_Still boxed in-still unable to move unless he forcefully shoved, pushed, punched his rival away-Ichigo could only continue to stand there and drink in the masculine and animalistic beauty that separated his rival from all the rest._

_Resting his eyes on the scar, becoming almost mesmerized now that he was seeing it up close-Ichigo dug his clipped nails into his palms resisting the urge to reach out and touch the raised brown/purple skin._

"_Heh, so you noticed my new art piece didya? Got it in the ole' homeland, pissed off some half blind bastard when I backed up into his car. He was gonna let me off with a warning til I made some crack comment about bangin' his sister-never woulda guessed that a tight wad light him could unleash such rage! A blade in the trunk of his car-not just a knife but a blade, you know the kind you see in the old museums round here-_

"_Katana."_

"_He speaks," a smirk, "Yeah so anyway bastard probably woulda severed the whole arm clean off if it hadn't been for this freaky lil blond kid with buck teeth."_

"_Wh-_

"_I didn't waste any time figuring out if an angel had come to save me or what-simply collected my shit and drove my wounded ass to the nearest clinic up the at the next road-66 stitches and several skin graphs later-here I am back in good ole' Karakura Town."_

_Ichigo wasn't sure what to say. He wondered why his rival decided to share something so personal with him?_

_He never expected-it-it just wasn't Grimmjow's style._

_Brown eyes studied blue-searching for answers._

"_What the hell are you looking at me like that for? Look lots of people suggested I should cover it up with long sleeve shirt, make up or the ever-favored fashionable tattoo-but I'll tell you what I told every last one of them-FUCK IT! I'm not runnin' for the fuckin' prom king, ain't no point in havin' baby smooth, unblemished skin," A cocky smirk, "I'll save that for my favorite strawberry princess."_

_Ichigo scowled at the familiar insult and then glared up at his rival (secretly hating the fact that the bastard had apparently grown yet another inch during his absence) _

'_**What the fuck do they feed teenagers in Canada anyway?'**_

"_So you followed me in here just to tell me that?"_

_Grimmjow's face was unreadable for a few minutes and then electric blues flashed and he further invaded Ichigo's private space "Were you expecting something else Kurosaki? A little souvenir perhaps?"_

_Ichigo bit back a groan as a jean covered knee rubbed at his groin-he willed him self to keep the groan off his lips and the blush off his face._

"_Maybe if you reach into my back pocket you'll find something g-_

_A sound of the locker room door being slammed open drowned out the rest of his rivals' sentence_

"_Ichigoooo you in here man?"_

_Keigo? Why the hell was Keigo looking for him?_

_Lips were at his ear- a low purr, "Tell him to leave."_

_First of all Ichigo did not take orders-especially not from his rival and secondly _

"_Look Ichigo a bunch of us are heading over to that new costume shop that just opened up in town and we're wonderin' if you want to come?"_

_The rubbing became more insistent-Ichigo was not quick enough to bite back the short moan that escaped his lips_

"_Ngh-uh uh yeah sure sounds great Keigo," when his rival snickered he countered by stomping on the bastards toe and hissed out "Cut that out, asshole!"_

_But it would be a cold day in Hades before Grimmjow listened to him so Ichigo could only do what needed to be done._

"_You still here Keigo?"_

_The brunet sounded uncertain or nervous?_

"_Y-Yeah I'm cool as a cucumber Ichigo just uh don't want to accidentally walk in on you naked because I'm so not gay-I don't care what Arisawa says I totally had no idea that Dancin' with Shinobi was a gay musical-I just thought it was a regular musical-type show about ninja's man and hey this locker room is a lot bigger than the one we used at soccer camp and-_

"_Keigo!"_

"_Huh? Oh! Yeah sorry, sorry anyway the shop its near (CRASH!)_

"_Are you alright Keigo?"_

"_I'm fine-I swear I don't even like the scent of dirty jockstraps-honest Ichigo you have to believe me."_

_Only Keigo's overdramatic behavior and borderline stupidity could make Ichigo forget whatever kind of embarrassment he normally would have felt._

_Grimmjow snickering did not help matters though._

"_I know you're not gay or whatever Keigo so just chill out!"_

"_Right, right yeah sure of course yeah I am-_

"_Keigo I'll meet you there okay?"_

"_Uh you know where it is?"_

_Actually Ichigo had no idea where the new costume shop was but that wasn't the point._

"_Yeah sorta-I'll figure it out-just go already you're letting all the cold air in."_

_(SLAM)_

"_So costume shop huh? You dressin' up for the ball on Saturday, Kurosaki?"_

_Ichigo blinked stupidly for a few minutes "Ball?"_

_Grimmjow had (thankfully) stopped with the rubbing and was now just back to being his regular cocky self-arms crossed over his muscular puffed out chest._

_Electric blues rolled, "The dance for your pants or whatever-heh gotta admit watchin' you dance for your pants might just make it worth it," a leer "Watchin' you dance with out your pants would be even better."_

_Ah there it was. The ever-loathed blush!_

_And in a flash Ichigo's personal bubble was popped once more as his rival pushed him up against the lockers and held him there "What do you say strawberry princess? Give me a treat and I'll teach you a few tricks?"_

_()()()_

_Following the age old tradition of the Kuchiki household, Rukia's brother and grandfather had insisted that Ichigo should come over and formally greet them and then ask to take his friend out-never mind that they were strictly going out as friends. Never mind that he had known the Kuchiki's since he was a young boy._

_Face stern, eyes narrowed Kuchiki Ginrei had given his blessing._

_Kuchiki Byakuya however…_

"_Kurosaki Ichigo heed my words: challenging as it may be for someone of your upbringing to comprehend, just remember that anything you do tonight will reflect back on Rukia, if you should tarnish the Kuchiki name in anyway I will rip out your tongue and keep in locked in a glass box on my desk."_

_Rather then cringing, gulping or cowering back in fear Ichigo just gave the older male a pat on the shoulder as if to say 'Ah Byakuya you really need to lighten up-you're too young to have wrinkles' but all he said was "You have my word Byakuya I'll bring Rukia back in one piece," following this a cheeky grin as he saw the way the raven winked at him "Though I certainly can't stop her if she chooses to ride home with someone else."_

_Eyes sharper then the finest steel narrowed to needle point slits "Kurosaki Ichigo do not toy with me. If you ever expect to wed my dearest sister then you had better learn some respect," and with these not-so-friendly words, the older Kuchiki brushed passed Ichigo with out another word._

_Ichigo didn't exactly pride himself on human expression or lack there of but he had a feeling that despite Byakuya's cold world's he was slowly but surely warming up to the older male._

'_Still hard to believe he's only 19 though.'_

"_Ahem," more amused then irritated Rukia called for his attention._

_Ichigo held out his hand and waited for his friend to take it before they set off for the dance in a limo (courtesy of goat face)_

_()()_

_The reason Rukia was his date for the dance?_

_It had been Inoue's idea_

_()()_

_FLASH!_

"_**Since none of us are able to go to the dance with the person we really wanted to go with, let's all go with each other. It'll be Renji-kun and myself and Kurosaki-kun with Kuchiki-san. Great idea right?"**_

_**Ichigo didn't really see any reason to protest against it especially since so many people had already convinced themselves that he and Rukia were a couple anyway.**_

"_**Sure, sounds great."**_

()()()

_And now as Ichigo sat inside the limo with his raven-haired friend seated across from him he thought 'If there was ever a girl worth taking a chance on it would definitely be her.'_

_He probably would have given it a shot with his childhood friend if I certain blue haired half Canadian hadn't caught his eye…among other things._

_Still Rukia looked kinda hot in her simple gauze blouse, brown corset with gold trim, black pants, over the knee russet brown boots-topping off the look with a hat that was way too big for her small head. The femme buccaneer extraordinaire if he ever saw one._

"_It was either this or jungle woman but Kuchiki's can never really pull off animal print-especially not cheetah."_

"_You look great, Rukia."_

_Rukia grinned at him "You don't look so bad yourself Mr. Robin Hood of the Modern Days." _

_Yes Ichigo had chosen to be Robin Hood-not because he had some sort of tight fetish and definitely not because he had some sort of strange urge to pierce every skank who came with in 2 meters or less of his too sexy and cocky for his own good rival with an arrow-tempting though that thought was._

_No he had chosen to be Robin Hood because he felt that out of all fictional/non-fictional characters he could relate to the guy._

_Ichigo had always really liked the idea of a non-traditional sort of hero-true Robin Hood was a thief clearly but he committed the crime for a greater purpose-stealing from the rich to give to the poor._

_Plus it was one of the only times Ichigo could get away with wearing forest green jeans-actually if he didn't have a bow and arrow he wouldn't even be recognized as Robin Hood at all._

_Since after all what the hell kind of hero wore a t-shirt and converse shoes?_

_()()_

_Miss Mashiro had conveniently forgot to mention that it wasn't just a simple dance but a freakin' competition!_

_Cinnamon and coffee colored orbs scanned the gymnasium which had been 'transformed' in a dance hall and Ichigo spotted his cousin and some of the powdered male's companions plus a new girl who he had never seen before._

_()()_

"_Hey, King fancy seein' ya here!"_

"_Shiro what's going on- I mean why didn't you tell me your high school was competing against ours?"_

_Gold eyes glittered as the albino teen adjusted his chain mail skirt-which Ichigo had noticed but decided not to comment on because his cousin was already full of himself with out the praise._

_Abandoning his previous question, Ichigo asked another "What are you supposed to be?"_

"_Sexy warrior from the middle ages because my ass is far too great to hide behind some vampire cloak or whatever."_

"_Um okay and what about your friends?"_

_Shiro grinned, "My minions of course," he grabbed the most out of place looking one in the group (as in no tattoos, makeup, hair dye or piercings) and pushed her forward "Ichigo meet Isane, Isane's family just moved here from Greece-I've taken it upon myself to show her 'round."_

"_Erm please to meet you," Her voice was soft and sweet and her cranberry purple gown was a fine contrast to her short mauve colored locks._

_Ichigo was about to return the greeting when a familiar laugh which could echo half way across the solar-system, reached his ears and grabbed his complete attention._

_He turned._

_Grimmjow had arrived and as always Szayel and Ilfort were flanking his right and left sides respectably although Szayel looked even more girly then usual with his long bubble gum colored wig, bright neon purple and pink horizontal striped mini dress and white go-go boots. _

_Only the shorts underneath gave away his true gender (but that's only if someone was looking)_

_His rival it seemed had traded his leather jacket and blue jeans in for a black and blue pinstripe zoot suit-his date (the foreign floozy with reddish-blond curls) was appropriately dressed as a flapper. _

_If Ichigo had a glass of punch in his hand at the moment he would have run over to the stupid twat and splashed it in her chalky white face!_

_But he remained right where he was and took note of the other Grantz twin, Ilfort had apparently decided to due his homeland (France) proud and don a beret, violin and a poodles (the poodles being the girls clinging to him) no seriously they had diamond collars, tiny fur coats and were actually barking and growling at each other._

_It was scary rather than amusing._

_And then suddenly electric blues were locking with his own-he didn't know how the hell his rival did it but some how someway he was always drawn back to those eyes._

"_Somethin' caught ya eye King?"_

_Shit! He'd totally forgotten his cousin was still here._

_Ichigo stomped down the blush that was threatening to rise and then turned to the powdered male "No I was just looking around for R-_

"_Don't lie to me King!" Gold eyes narrowed and Shiro grabbed his arm "Even with these shitty disco-lights I can tell when my Ichi is blushing."_

_BUSTED!_

"_Point em' out to me and I'll find out for myself if the bastard is worthy!"_

"_Wait a minute! What makes you say it's a guy?"_

_But albino never got a chance to answer because Rukia returned just then with Inoue and Renji in tow. The princess and the tattooed pineapple had decided to be Tarzan and Jane apparently._

"_Excuse us Shiro but we actually need to steal Ichigo away for a little while, Mashiro-sensei is requesting that all of the boys join her in the auditorium."_

"_Unless ya grew a dick over night Ruki-chan ya are not one of the boys."_

_Rather than being offended the raven smirked "Oh didn't you know I only pack on weekends."_

_Ichigo raised a brow wondering what the hell Rukia could have meant by that._

_Inoue beamed at him "I love your costume Kurosaki-kun!"_

_Ichigo blinked for a few minutes "Oh thanks Inoue."_

_()()()_

_And apparently Miss Mashiro and co also forget to mention that in order to compete they would have to wear skin tight clothing which left very little to the imagination._

_"Hell no! I'm not wearing THAT!" Renji was doing a favor for Ichigo and all of the other male students with his loud protest against the outfits that the green-haired woman had passed out._

_Ichigo noted that even Grantz who normally would embrace anything loud and flashy like no other did not seem to be anxious to give up his little go-go dancer ensemble._

_Of course that might have something to do with the way Renji had been checking out the pepto-prince once, twice, thrice-not that it came as any real surprise at the end of the day his tattooed friend was like every other guy their age (excluding himself of course) a pair of long legs in a sexy outfit was all it took._

_Ichigo wondered what would happen if someone let it slip that Miss Go-Go was Grantz?_

_Renji would probably turn 50 shades of crimson, then 14 shades of green and high tail it out of this flash pants dance from hell so damn fast well..._

_"Mashiro-sensei perhaps we could just forget the whole costume thing and just worry about the actual dancing?" It was now Ichigo's turn to speak on behalf of his fellow man._

_Mashiro pouted her glittery painted lips "Oh but berry-tan I got a lot of money riding on you."_

_Gambling was one thing-gambling on her students? Did the woman have no shame?_

_"Sensei perhaps I can be of some assistance,"_

_As if on cue the group turned to find Ishida standing there decked out in all white outfit with hints of blue. _

_Ichigo couldn't really figure out what his bespectacled friend was supposed to be but then Ishida slipped off his cloak and revealed a pristine white toga underneath._

"_What did you have in mind Ryu-tan?"_

_Well that was a new one-up until this moment Ichigo had never heard anyone shorten Ishida's first name like that. Why did Miss Mashiro insist on treating/talking to them like they were children?"_

_Ishida seemed entirely unfazed as he revealed what he had in his bag._

_()()()_

_5 minutes or so later…_

"_There now none of you have any reason to complain because you're all wearing the same thing."_

"_The ladies have been given the same exact suits only they are donning a bold red color."_

_Scuba diving suits. Well Ichigo supposed there were far worse 'costumes' his friend could have pulled from his bag._

_Miss Mashiro clapped her hands and beamed at the up and coming designer "Wonderful idea Ryu-tan," she turned back to the group "In addition to your suits each of you will be given a different colored sash-do not lose it!"_

_The woman paid no mind as Ichigo and his fellow man grumbled about 'winding up looking like fruits in the end anyway.'_

'_There was only one up side to this whole thing,' thought Ichigo as he not-so-discreetly devoured his rival from afar with his eyes-not that he hadn't done so before but it was twice as a delicious view now because he could make out every single solitary muscle. 'If only I could just-?'_

_He needed to flee…now! _

_Before he embarrassed himself._

_EXIT HERE I COME!_

_()()()_

_Only for his cousin Shiro still decked out in his chain mail skirt (apparently Rancar Academy did not have to change there costumes) to find him sulking underneath the old tree and then coaxing (pulling) back inside._

_()()()_

_The powdered teen did not let go of his hold instead he decided to further embarrass Ichigo by dragging him out on to the dance floor before the competition even started._

_()()()_

_Apparently Shiro had missed the memo: No same sex couplings out on the dance floor!_

_No the bino-berry hadn't missed it at all-he simply didn't give two shits!_

_Sticking his dyed blue tongue out childishly and telling the uptight staff members "BITE ME!"_

_Ichigo might have found his cousins behavior amusing except that he didn't because "Damn it Shiro-let go everyone is starting to stare."_

_Gold eyes glittered and the powdered male pulled Ichigo closer "Let them stare, between ya and me we're the hottest bitches in the room right now,"_

_Ichigo searched the dance hall in hopes of finding his would be rescuer-but found none._

_Renji had run off to who knows where. Chado and Ishida were engaged in deep conversation and Rukia, being entirely unhelpful as always, just let out a whoop of approval (of course because she was just as much as a pervert as Shiro!) and then wrapped her arms possessively around Inoue, paying no mind to Tatsuki who was holding one angry hell cat (Chizuru) back from killing the raven for touching her Hime-chan!_

_Of course this was all assumptions based on the actions being played out before him-for all Ichigo knew his friends might just be rehearsing lines for a play or chatting about a new sitcom on tv or something. _

_As Shiro beckoned the girl from Greece over to join in on their dance brown eyes searched for the nearest escape route and instead found a black cloud-it was as though death himself had come to the ball-nope not death just one uber pissed off-no make that FUCKING FURIOUS Grimmjow Jeagerjaques!_

_But why was his rival so furious? Had the skank from his homeland blew him off?_

_Ichigo didn't think the blue haired male would care about such things like that-figured Grimmmjow would just move on to the next scantily clad whore._

_He frowned. Not liking the idea of some damn wench having such an effect on his rival!_

_And now to add to Ichigo's annoyance-he was being sandwiched between his cousin and Isane-the two were dancing so damn close to him it could almost be considered dry humping._

_He heard a sigh followed by a breathy moan-FUCK! It was a dry humping session._

_Ichigo snorted, 'Well there's no way we're gonna win any competition-hell I wouldn't be surprised if I got suspended after this.'_

_Being suspended for his cousins shameless ways did not sound appealing to Ichigo in the least so using a trick he saw in a movie once, the orange haired youth managed to break free from the powdered male and his mauve haired companion._

_()()()_

_Ah outside…breathing in the fresh clean mid-October air._

_Well as fresh as a polluted town can be anyway._

_Point is Ichigo was thrilled to finally be out of that damn dance hall-he had half a mind to call it a night but knew that if he abandoned Rukia, Byakuya would come after him and it would not be pretty._

_He let out a sigh and then rested his back against the brick wall-thinking about everything and nothing._

_Orange brows furry and Ichigo wonders why it feels like a set of nails are digging into his shoulder blade_

_()()()_

And then when he hears his cousin snicker he knows that his latest trip down memory lane is over.

BACK INTO THE PRESENT!

"Rise and shine King, its time return to happy Mr. sunshine."

Ichigo looks around the cell surprised to find that only his powdered cousin and Ulquiorra who still hasn't taken his claws out of his shoulder blade are the only ones around.

"You're newly acquired fan boys really wanted to say good bye to ya but Quiorra refused to part with you for even a minute."

As if to confirm Shiro's words the green-eyed male pinched Ichigo's bare bottom.

Wait! Bare?

More snickers!

Bastards they had-they had

"What can I say I felt sorry for Nnoi-Nnoi, Ken-Ken and the Coyote so I gave them a few souvenirs to remember ya by."

"SHIRO!"

()()()

(**Grimmjow)**

It was mid afternoon and he had blown of work yet again in favor of meeting his friends-yes friends-as annoying as Szayel and Illfort could be they had stuck by his side long after high school ended and had earned the right to calm themselves his friend.

It had been Szayel's idea-seemed the former pepto prince had an announcement to make.

And rather than simply making his announcement he wanted to get together and eat.

Grimmjow liked to eat. What guy didn't?

Well okay there were a few but he made it a rule to never associate with twinky bastards with eating disorders and body dysmorphia.

Preferred to surround him self by guys who can enjoy an actual meal-not bird food although some people would argue that birds ate quite a lot but that wasn't the fucking point.

The only reason he himself hadn't packed on the pounds was because exercising was all part of his daily routine-not necessarily pumping iron at the gym (not that there was much reason to even leave the apartment complex when the entire bottom floor was designed for grade A gym bunnies anyway-not that he went down there much-he had a much better alternative to shaving off undesired calories-pounding some hot piece of ass between the sheets- although granted he had been slacking off lately-schedule had been completely thrown out of balance due to thoughts/memories of his former rival consuming him.

How the hell could Grimmjow stay focused when his mind drifted and everything in sight seemed to resemble his long lost strawberry? Even the damn telephone pole above his head seemed to be taunting him.

Brought to mind a different poll.

()()()

_**FLASHBACK**_

_Vote Kurosaki: Students will be able to have their lunch off school grounds-McHollows Munchies on Me! Saturday detentions, rather than being stuffed inside an overcrowded classroom writing lines, students will hop aboard the school bus and clean up the park district, the athletes will receive new uniforms-GO REAPERS! The science lab will be moved to the newly remodeled basement. To the current champion: Hey Ishida no hard feelings-may the best man win!_

_Vote Ishida: Each student will be given their own individual menu designed by some of the top dietitians across the globe. Elect me and students and staff members alike can look forward to an extra hour of GAMI Radio. Saturday detentions-there is really no point to run half way across the town to clean up the parks when there is plenty of cleaning and reconstructing to be done right here on the grounds of Gami High-let's make our school shine! And now to the challenger, do not make promises that you cannot actually keep Kurosaki! _

_Kurosaki Ichigo vs Ishida Uryu_

_It really was a no brainer._

_One merely had to take one look at the orange haired teen and in that moment their decision would be final._

_Whether he liked to admit or not Kurosaki had a certain aura around him-one that said he was born to lead-one that pulled others close to him._

_Not that Ishida didn't have supporters-he did-but the fashionista-in-training didn't know how to capture an entire crowd with a single word or an intense look._

_Kurosaki was wild, unstructured, short tempered._

_Ishida was careful, organized, even tempered._

_Kurosaki could insult/beat his greatest enemy one minute only to turn around 5 minutes later to help the same person out of an unwanted situation or conflict._

_Ishida would only step in if and when he deemed it necessary to do so and on these rare occasions the 'helping hand' was usually accompanied by a scathing remark, a backwards compliment or a lecture of the century._

_Kurosaki and Ishida weren't complete opposites though._

_They had a few things in common_

_One: Both teens did not like to draw attention to them selves._

_Two: Both teens did not care for drama._

_Three: Both teens tended to surround themselves around members of the fairer sex but ironically still wound up looking like the 'bitch' in the end._

_These were all basic observations Grimmjow made as he watched his the berry during the first few months of school._

_But it meant nothing._

_At the end of the day he didn't really give a damn who won-the whole student class president thing was fuckin' ridiculous in his opinion!_

"_I need an answer Grimmjow."_

_Grimmjow bit back the curse that threatened to leave his lips. Shit! Yama-ji could be so fucking pushy and annoying at times._

_No wonder they hardly (if ever) saw eye to eye._

_When he had first received the slip of paper in the middle of class Grimmjow had thought the old man had finally been able to convince the morons back home over in Canada to release his mothers ashes so he could scatter them around his new home. He felt that way the woman would always be near him._

_It was a stupid and childish way of thinking and the woman had been the furthest thing from a saint, they had clashed over just about everything but still-she was his mother and as her one and only son he would honor her in the best ways he knew how._

_But no Gramps hadn't called Grimmjow in the office to give him good news-he called him in the office to discuss the stupid incomplete voting poll._

_Like Grimmjow gave two fucks!_

_They were freshman-like fuckin' first years had any real power or control._

_He gave a careless shrug when Yama-ji tapped his fingers on the desk as a sign of his impatience._

_Figured he was going to be stuck in here for awhile Grimmjow decided to make himself comfortable-propping his booted feet on top of the cluttered desk much the to old geezers irritation. _

"_What's it got to do with me, gramps?"_

_Yamamoto rubbed the sides of his temples "You need to vote-as things stand at this moment-Ichigo and Uryu arer tied-with your vote we'll have a winner."_

_Wait a minute!_

_So it all came down to Grimmjow?_

_He was the deciding factor so to speak._

_The power was in his hands-he could basically control the outcome-he could either make sure that the strawberry princess sank or swam._

'_Decisions, decisions'_

_A grin made its way on to his face-interest now piqued "Go on."_

_The old man looked like he was ready to pop a vein or something as dark wrinkled eyes narrowed-a deceptively strong equally wrinkled hand shoved his foot off the desk _

"_Don't talk to me like I'm one of your stoner or delinquent friends-I demand some respect and so help me BOY if you don't show it drastic measures will be taken._

_Grimmjow wanted to yawn in complete and utter boredom but opted against it. _

_It was best to just get this crap over with. "So you need my vote is that what you're telling me?"_

"_Yes. All you have to do is place a check mark next to the candidates name that you feel will represent our school best and then you can return to whatever it is you were doing-until I find another reason to call you."_

_Grimmjow snorted "Let's say I agree to put in my vote, let's say I agree to take it one step further and actually get to know and possibly befriend some of my fellow classmates-what will you offer me in return?"_

_The old man did not respond right away and Grimmjow wondered if he might have taken it too far but he wouldn't be who he was if he decided to back track now._

_So all he could do was sit patiently and wait._

_15 minutes went by and growing bored and restless, Grimmjow grabbed the thumbtacks sitting in the small jar, put them in between unnaturally sharp canines and then fired the tacks at the wall._

_Another 5 minutes passed and Yama-ji cleared his throat._

"_I can not guarantee you that your mother's ashes will be returned to you as soon as you would like but I can promise you that they will be returned," a pause "In addition when you have reached the appropriate age her prized Jaguar will belong to you._

_Grimmjow raised a speculative brow "I thought the car was going to T-_

"_Your cousin is already spoiled enough as it is-so no the car will be given to you."_

"_What's the catch?"_

_Because there was always a catch and Grimmjow wasn't a fucking dumb ass._

"_Until you are of legal age the car will remain in my garage and every now and then (every second week out of the month) I will take my late daughters most prized possession out for a spin."_

_Grimmjow felt like laughing (the image of a wrinkled bastard behind the wheel of a sports car was fucking ridiculous) but he didn't want gramps to suddenly go back on his word._

"_Deal."_

_He moved to leave-_

"_Sit down!"_

_Oh right yeah sure much as he wanted to he could not leave yet-_

_A rather pricey looking ball point pen was shoved in Grimmjow's face-he kept the growl out of his tone as he told the old man to pass him the slips of blue._

"_Check mark is all it needs right?"_

_At Yamamoto's nod Grimmjow pulled off the cap, carelessly tossing it somewhere and then pressed the pen to the paper-a tiny dot formed._

_He could feel the old man's eyes on him and he pressed it to the paper once more forming a second dot._

_He pulled the pen away a new idea suddenly forming in his mind._

_Kurosaki wouldn't know what hit him!_

"_Say gramps are there any special requirements I have to fulfill in order to become a member of the student council?"_

_Rather than being aggravated that Grimmjow continued to stall-a grin made its way on to the old man's face. _

"_Excellent idea Grimmjow! Very well we will leave the final decision up to the members of the student council."_

"_Uh that's not quite what I m-_

_But it was a lost cause-the rest of Grimmjow's words were ignored as Yama-ji slipped on his jacket and loafers and commanded the youth to follow him._

_()()()_

_48 hours later…_

_It was one day after the class president was elected but rather than being given permission to leave-his upper classman insisted that he stick around because after all there was still plenty of work to be done._

_While Grimmjow wasn't tickled pink with the idea he figured, Heh how bad can it be?_

_10 minutes in and he was ready to strangle the guy next to him (not that the fool had particularly wronged him-Grimmjow simply wished to make the time pass more quickly-maybe if he started a nice little blood bath they would let him call it a day._

_()()_

_Who the hell knew a student council meeting could be so effing boring?_

_It had come as a great relief to Grimmjow when the head of the student council took pity on him and let him take a break-which to the blue haired male translated as: FREEDOM!_

_Best place to start-outside in the day light-he felt like he had been coped up inside all damn day (maybe because he had) and spending a little time up on the roof would be the perfect way to enjoy himself but before he went ahead with that plan he was going to quench his thirst-water it was calling to him!_

_()()()_

_12 minutes to 2 o clock in the afternoon…_

_Cloud gazing had never been a favored way to spend his free time but even Grimmjow had to admit that the sky was rather pretty from time to time._

_And suddenly a shadow is blocking his view-and then he is being hoisted to his feet-hands on his leather jacket (electric blues narrow)-how dare some bastard touch his leather jacket!_

_A faint scent of peaches reaches his nose and Grimmjow recognizes said bastard to be his rival-well technically to call Kurosaki his rival isn't quite accurate since they only had that one fight in the beginning of the year and all and the orange haired youth tends to keep as far away from him as possible but-but Grimmjow knows-he can sense it-feel it this is his destined rival-all he has to do is…_

_Wait! Wait a minute Kurosaki is talking at a mile of a minute and glaring daggers at him-it takes a moment for the words to form a complete sentence in Grimmjow's brain and then blue eyes are narrowing even more._

_Who the fuck does this soon-to-be rival think he is anyway?_

"_Hate to burst your bubble strawberry princess but you never stood a chance."_

_Not entirely true-in fact he had very much considered voting for Kurosaki but…that would have been too boring._

_Granted he had taken it one step further using crafty words and other acquired skills to convince the members on the council to change their votes as well._

_The whole thing was way above and beyond out of control._

_But then again he expected no less from Yami-ji. _

_And Grimmjow didn't do boring._

_But fixing the votes?_

_Tch! As if he'd do something so fuckin' shady._

_Brown eyes burning with barely concealed rage and then-_

_WHAM!_

_An unexpected blow to the face-and a hard one at that._

_It is at this very moment when Grimmjow Jeagerjaques realizes that he might have just experienced his first glimpse of the funny (or not so funny) little thing called LOVE._

_Not able to handle these sudden urges to grab the other boy and smash their mouths together-Grimmjow pushes the shorter teen away from him and flees._

_()()()_

_The feeling of blood beneath his nails-of bones breaking from his crushing grip-the horrific screams and cries of the poor little bastard on the receiving end is music to his ears._

_Red, black and blue._

_Then green and yellow._

_It might not be the most effective way to bury thoughts/dreams of another member of his same gender but it makes for a fine distraction for the moment…_

_Yama-ji does not agree._

_()()()_

_And so Grimmjow finds himself sitting inside of a hideous brightly colored room waiting for the 'doctor' who is supposed to help the teen learn how to manage and control his anger-eventually suppress it entirely._

_It's around 4:15 in the afternoon and the bastard has yet to show his face-not that Grimmjow cares-he doesn't give a damn how much money gramps is paying this 'doctor' he's not gonna admit shit. _

_Because there's nothing wrong with h-_

_The door creaks open and a man (a lot younger than the youth had been expecting) steps inside the room, the afternoon sunlight giving white hair a golden sheen, eyes closed, mouth set into a wide grin and as he slinks towards his chair-the image of a cobra enters Grimmjow's mind._

_This guy is supposed to help him? Riiiiiiight._

"_Let's begin shall we?"_

_As if Grimmjow has any fuckin' choice?"_

_But he damn sure isn't gonna make it easy on the doctor._

"_So what brings yer here today?"_

_()()()_

_In the end not quite against his will (although Grimmjow would certainly preach a different speech if asked later) he told the man about his issues in regards to the orange strawberry…_

"_And how does that make you feel?"_

_Ah the old age question-how does it make him feel._

"_How do you think I fuckin' feel? I feel like a freak! A fag in the making! A GD King of Fairies ready to make my debut-I was this close (Grimmjow held up his thumb and index finger keeping the two only a micro inch apart from each other-this fucking close to claiming his m-ahhh FUCK IT! Just hurry up and give me my damn meds so I can be on my way!"_

"_Now hold on just a second, kitten."_

_A single blue brow twitched-this snake-like looking bastard did not just call him something so bloody…GIRLY!_

_Grimmjow let out a snarl but the man didn't seem the least bit fazed._

'_Ichimaru Gin, the best therapist money can by' yes yes he could recall gramps words crystal fuckin' clear but it was bullshit-gramps was clearly fuckin' losin' it in his old age and-_

"_Yer really are gonna hafta learn to work on that temper Grimm-kun, the beginning stages of a rainbow child can be a very delicate time as it is and-_

"_SHUT UP YOU FUCKIN' ASSHOLE SHRINK I'M NOT GAY!"_

"_Tsk, tsk now there's no need to be so hostile kitten I am merely telling you to reign in your anger because it is the only way we can begin the healing process."_

"_I don't need to be healed because there's nothing wrong with me."_

_A grin wide enough to split the man's face into if such things were possible outside of fiction "Very good you have admitted that while you may not be comfortable with these new changes it doesn't mean yer damaged."_

_WTF?_

_He never said-this bastard was twisting his words and-_

"_Tell me more about this dream," Ichimaru prompted as Grimmjow searched the room for the sharpest item available _

"_You're at the cemetery visiting your late mother, such a shame when loved ones must pass on until the next life," a sigh "And then you spot him resting on another grave stone and although not quite in your right frame of mind-because who can possibly be clear headed when they are mourning the loss of a loved one-you beckon this strawberry boy of yours to come over, is that correct?"_

_Grimmjow (uncharacteristically) struggled for the right words for a few minutes as blue eyes focused on the heavy paper weight rabbit on the desk rather than at the man addressing him _

"_Sorta I mean its not like he was really there sleeping or anything-more like Kuro-the strawberry boy was a figment of my imagination-at a raised brow Grimmjow wanted to punch something! _

"_Look it's difficult to explain alright but for the past few nights while I'm tossing and turning I can never find sleep until I summon him-well not summon because that's fuckin' stupid but damn it! _

_You know what I mean-he's there and I suddenly just feel so damn warm-almost unearthly sort of warmth surrounds me-he doesn't speak a word-we just sit there in silence-I turn and glance over at him every few minutes and-Argggg shut up shut up shut up I don't want him and I damn sure fuckin' don't need him. _

"_He thinks he's some kinda fuckin' saint with his bright orange locks and those fuckin' brown eyes and those-argggg look chicks can be dumb as rocks and annoying as fuck but their chicks they don't know any better-really their only good for one thing but every time I start to sneak my hand down some cheerleaders bra or up some goth girl's thigh-Kuro-the strawberry and that stupid pouty face of his enters my mind and then my whole night/day/noon-what the fuck ever is shot to hell and gah why the fuck do I want him?_

_It's not fuckin' normal not that I give two shits about normality but Kuro-the strawberry-he's nothin' special-he's not-!_

_Wetness gathered at the corner of his eye-Grimmjow angrily wiped it a way-fuck at this rate he was turning into to a fuckin' chick._

_The way the doctor was now chuckling lightly did not help his mood one damn bit._

_Electric blues fell on the paperweight once more and the blue haired youth considered picking it up and hurling it right at Ichimaru's snake like face-maybe the sight of all that crimson would be the perfect way to regain his pride-his manhood!_

_Grimmjow grinded his teeth together-FUCKING Kurosaki Ichigo it was all his damn fault-the little strawberry bastard was turning him into-_

_()()()_

_**SLAM!**_

_A grown man should not walk into a glass door-it just wasn't something a grown man did._

_FUCK! Shit hurt like a son of a bitch!_

Grimmjow blinked-well look at that even in his stupid dreamy daze he had managed to bring himself to the bar and grill where he was meeting Szayel and Ilfort but wait something was off-an all too familiar shock of fire engine cherry red hair and bold tattoos

'_**Abarai!'**_

Abarai stopped laughing at whatever joke Ilfort had been telling and snarled when he spotted him "What the hell is _**he**_ doing here?"

Grimmjow would have raised a brow except he was quite used to the monkeys vocal out bursts by now all though he was a bit taken a back the fierce expression in red-brown eyes.

"Now, now Ren calm down we are all going to sit down and have a nice lunch and friendly chat," amber eyes flicked in his direction "Isn't that right Grimmjow?"

Grimmjow would have snorted with amusement at Szayel's way of consoling the tattooed redhead-the way the former pepto-prince was patting the taller male as though he were a puppy rather than a person.

Til this day he still didn't know just how Szayel had managed to capture Abarai long enough to win the redhead over-he'd probably never know.

Grimmjow did know how it started though…well sort of-there were actually quite a lot of events that took place before his pink-haired companion went after what he wanted.

In addition he himself had created opportunities for Szayel to make his claim-but of course the redhead didn't know that.

()()()

But unlike Kurosaki who had completely fallen off Grimmjow's radar until just recently, Abarai had kept in touch.

Or more accurately Grimmjow had sort of become the tattooed red heads baby sitter while the Grantz twins went out to make their next million with whatever the hell it was they did during the day-damn sure wasn't singing-that was more of a side hobby type of thing.

And why?

Because he and Abarai were in the same boat.

Both equally responsible for the fall out with the orange berry.

()()

_Rather than the whole explosive bone crushing, heart hammering exit-Kurosaki had quietly with drawn-no longer batting an eye lash when Grimmjow approached him-those expressive eyes had become closed off and no amount of teasing or taunts or physical attacks could get the desired effect._

_Not that Grimmjow hadn't tried-he had several times on numerous occasions-did everything he could think of to get his rival to look at him again but it had been pointless._

_The closest he came was when the orange haired youth pulled him into a group picture during their senior class trip and said, "Hey do you think you can do me a favor and act like you're having a good time."_

_And it had come as such a shock that the strawberry was suddenly speaking to him again and Grimmjow had almost forgotten how to respond-almost but not quite "And if I do what will you give me in return?"_

_And then his rival had punched him in the arm and forced him to smile._

_And then after the flash on the camera went off just like that-the warmth went away and Kurosaki disappeared up the mountains with his girlfriend._

_()()_

The thought still made Grimmjow fuckin' bitter til this day-

'_**Girlfriend my ass! He never once showed even the slightest interest in a fine set of T and A-not until after that fuckin' house party anyway!'**_

Grimmjow had tossed the thoughts over and over in his brain until it felt like his fuckin' head would explode!

He had replayed the events of that night over and over in his mind and still to this day nothing made any fucking sense-unless it was like Abarai said and someone opened their big fuckin' mouth and spread the word of their 'drunken, depressed and desperate (on the redheads part) hook up.

_()()_

_It was originally supposed to just be a game-Grimmjow had gotten wind that Kurosaki might actually ditch the books for one night in favor of a party-his party-with the help of both Szayel and Illfort the trio had managed to round up all redheads in Karakura Town and-_

"Hi my name is Miki and I'll be your server what can I get for you. Let's start with drinks!"

Fuck this wasn't the time to be taking more trips down memory lane-Grimmjow had to keep fully focused here-kicking thoughts of his rival and their not-so-pleasant fall out down-he reached for the menu…

()()()

"Alright now that we've all had our fill of greasy goodness let's get down to the real reason we have asked you to join us on this lovely afternoon shall we?"

Szayel was grinning too fucking bright-what the hell was he up to?

Electric blues flicked over to Ilfort who really hadn't paid the group any attention the entire time they were there-in fact the blond didn't even seem to care about what his twin wished to announce-much rather continue fiddling around with his I phone.

Grimmjow shrugged not really giving a damn about banana boy anyway-he looked to Abarai who was glaring down at his empty water glass.

He took note of the lopsided ponytail and a book of some sort clutched beneath the redheads arms.

"You can glare at the empty glass all you wanna Abarai it won't instantly produce more water."

The tattooed males head shot up and he glared at Grimmjow.

Something that the blue haired male was getting quite fucking sick of!

"Alright what the fuck is going on?"

A pause and then "Just answer me one question: When you went to Ichigo's house the other day did you see him?"

()()()

Later that evening…

On the rare occasion where Grimmjow might agree to do something without the guarantee that it will benefit him some way in the end that does not necessarily mean that he will stick around for the entire time.

Halibel can block the door with her steel-toed boot all she wants to it will not stop Grimmjow from getting away from this so called movie-night.

He should have realized something was off when his blonde roommate suddenly announced that the usual place for movie night had been changed-well Hali-chan's exact words had been-

()()

"_**Apache's living room is being remodeled so we're taking movie night to Luppi's studio apartment."**_

()()

"_Oh did I forget to mention we're doing things a little differently all together."_

"_What are you talking about Halibel?"_

"_Well," the blonde was giving him an uber girly grin right now and Grimmjow was beginning to think he was having some sort of weird trippy nightmare-Halibel never grinned like that-what the hell was- _

"_I've been thinking about your whole blast from the past bit lately and it kind of made me want to revisit my own past-not high school of course," green eyes rolled "I have no desire what so ever to revisit my days as a catholic school girl."_

_Halibel was full on giggling now as she fumbled with the tv equipment. _

"_Is there a point to all this?"_

_Before the blonde had been able to answer his question the doorbell rang and several footsteps could be heard-followed by several voices._

_And then the door blew open and Luppi was the first one to fly in (not literally of course) in all his poster boy flair. He took of fhis sunglasses and loosened his scarf before tossing it on the back of the hat hanger and then sashayed towards the kitchen and then returned 5 minutes later when everyone was sitting down._

_()()()_

So movie night had quickly become 'What we were like when we were children' kinda night.

Grimmjow didn't give a damn what his friends and roommate looked like when they were little and toddled around in diapers.

What a complete and total waste of time.

But this is not the real reason our panther like male is ready to roar.

No if it was a simple as Halibel and company trying to annoy the crap out of him he would have walked right back out the door a few minutes after he walked in.

Let it go on record at this time that Grimmjow does not throw childish tantrums or sulk-growling on the other hand…that is the most manly of way to voice his displeasure with the two she-girls better known as siblings-no not his siblings, the sisters of his former rival.

It's not rocket science he knew that the reason the twins had apparently tracked him down and crashed 'movie night' was because they were looking out for their dear Ichi-nii.

Yes Kurosaki Karin and Yuzu, teenage versions of their mother, Masaki.

The woman was really going to make it as difficult as possible before the night of the official party.

Not that he could blame Masaki entirely, if the strawberry princess was his child he'd probably be fiercely protective as well.

Grimmjow snorted-now that was by far the weirdest thought ever.

Enough! He needed to get out of here and clear his head.

Halibel was still blocking the door.

"I didn't peg you for a coward Grimmjow-san."

Voice sugar sweet, eyes only a shade darker than her brother Yuzu was surprisingly more intimidating with her brilliant smile then Karin was with the infamous glare-which seemed to run in the Kurosaki family.

"He's not a coward Yuzu, Ichi-nii never would have given this guy a second glance if he was the cowardly type- hard eyes narrowed "No I'm guessing from everything Kaa-chan told us that he's commitment-challenged."

The blonde twin looked thoughtful while her sister continued glaring and Grimmjow let his mind drift-all though he really didn't know why exactly but he supposed it made sense in a way…

'_**If these two are here shouldn't that 'Kon' character also be here? They're all siblings after all.'**_

He could dimly recall the apricot-blonde haired, hazel eyed womanizer.

Because Grimmjow had eyes for his rival and his rival only back then he barely paid Kon any attention and it was only one time when he had made the foolish mistake of confusing the two

()()()

_In Grimmjow's defense his rival's fraternal twin looked identical from the back, especially when bundled up in gloves, mittens, a fluffy down jacket and skin tight jeans._

_()()_

_It was the holiday season and Grimmjow wasn't exactly in the best of moods. Gramps was hosting some fancy dinner party and the blue haired youth had wanted absolutely no part of it!_

_He was a born and bred Canadian and an arranged marriage was completely out of the question!_

_Kicking up rock salt with his boots Grimmjow stomped down the street with no real intended destination in mind-_

_Maybe he'd catch a movie at that old Quincy theatre-well then again he had no real interest in paying close to 9 bucks to see some Grade B movie with third rate actors-_

_()()_

_His feet had led him to the park and then he spotted a familiar figure sitting on one of the swings._

_()()_

_Never one to pass up a opportunity to harass his rival in one way or another, Grimmjow made his way over to the other teen, deciding that his usual verbal greeting would just not do at this moment in time especially when the faint scent of snoring reached his ears._

_He considered his options. He could A) wake his rival up by literally knocking him off the swing B) Hum a tuneless song right next to Kurosaki's sensitive ears which were partially covered by a rather dorky looking wool hat with cat ears- C)Let his gloved fingers to all the talking._

_It was Kurosaki's fault for not only looking so adorable while he slept but also taunting Grimmjow by wearing short and tight fabrics which often more than not would ride up and reveal peach-toned skin._

_It was almost unnatural how smooth the strawberry princess' skin was._

_Electric blues did a quick scan of the park-just incase one of his rivals friends was hiding out somewhere-_

_Finding the coast clear Grimmjow went ahead with his plan and let his fingers lightly brush the skin-_

_Hands down his rival's lower back was one of Grimmjow's favorite parts. _

_Why? Because just below the back was Kurosaki's perfectly shaped and toned ass-which the blue haired youth vowed would one day definitely be his!_

_Nice and easy now_

"_Ahhhhhhhhh!"_

_A squawk followed by the swing flipping upside down and his rival crashing to the pebbled ground._

_Grimmjow couldn't stop himself from chuckling. "It's not like you to be so clumsy Strawberry Princes."_

_Another squawk and then the figure turned around and pointed an accusing finger at him "Ahhh I've been violated! The great Kon-sama, the ultimate ladies lover has been violated by a man in a leather trench," he started backing away, hazel brown eyes practically popping out of their sockets "Y-you stay away from me!"_

_Grimmjow's laughter quickly died down and now a glare marred his face. As he took a closer look at the boy who he had mistaken for his rival he wanted to slap himself._

_"Of all the things that could have happened to Kon-sama while he's napping in the park in the late afternoon right before the winter frost-of all the gah! Why couldn't it have been Rukia-nee-san or giggly goddess from the valley of the rain, Ame my loooooooove Kon-sama dreams of your warm body, your rose petal lips upon his-_

_"Pipe down already would ya!"_

_"No this can't be," Kon continued to wail while backing further and further away until Grimmjow caught his arm._

_Once again he wanted to smack himself. How could he have mistaken this loud obnoxious fool to be his number rival?_

_They didn't even look alike._

_During his "non-rivals" little out burst his hat had fallen off revealing short apricot colored hair with blond high lights, hazel brown eyes which were widely set apart and a slightly barely noticeable pouch (sometimes referred to as left over baby fat)_

_"Somebody else? Somebody else? How could I, the great Kon-sama be mistaken for someone else twice in one day-GAH THE HORROR!" The angry youth started to grumble under his breath._

_Grimmjow raised a brow at the not quite doppelganger of his strawberry princess._

_He raked his brain for a moment and then it came to him._

_Yes Grimmjow had seen in this brat a few times-normally sitting with fellow manga loving geeks at the last table in the back of the lunch room._

_Kon even had another persona complete with costume, cape and everything else, called himself the Karakara Riser, defender of distressed damsels across the land or something._

_Grimmjow snorted and then decided that not all was lost "Yo!"_

_Predictably Kon let out another scream and fell back on his ass again "SOMEBODY SAVE ME!"_

_"Shut up already! I just want to ask you a question."_

_Kon stopped wailing long enough to blink up at Grimmjow "W-What do you want?"_

_"You're Kurosaki's brother eh?"_

_"Kuro-oh Ichigo? Ichigo that bastard! He locked Kon-sama out of the house, stupid selfish boobie hogger-wanted Rukia-nee all too himself-wouldn't let Kon-sama play with t-URK!"_

_Grimmjow didn't know what had suddenly come over him-yes actually he did-the mere mention of his rival and Kuchiki made his blood boil!_

_He couldn't think straight and although Kon was clearly NOT his rival he needed to pound something-close enough!_

_So he choked the squirming youth until the boy started turning an unhealthy shade of blue-then Grimmjow tossed Kon about a foot or so a way from him-not thinking much on it when a puddle of blood started to bleed into the pure white snow when the youth's head hit the metal slide._

_()()()_

_Nothing says 'good morning' like a solid punch to the face!_

"_Surely you know well enough by now that we do not start the foreplay until after I've had my coffee and toast, Kurosaki."_

_His rival was not amused-far from it. The strawberry princess was all angry glares and inferno burning eyes._

_Grimmjow ran his fingers through his bed head hair as he pondered what could have pissed the orange haired youth off enough that he would actually seek him out on a Saturday morning-more accurately Christmas morning._

_And suddenly Grimmjow finds himself being hoisted and thrown off his own damn front porch (fuck! Sometimes he forgets just how strong his rival is) and face first into the bitter cold snow._

_He gets to his knees, spitting blood from his mouth and grins at his rival dangerously "Now Kurosaki, that's not exactly the best way to ring in the holiday ch-_

"_SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU SPINELESS DERANGED ASSHOLE!"_

_A blow to the stomach and another to the shin and then the strawberry princess is smashing into him-_

_Snow goes up Grimmjow's nose as the orange haired youth tackles him and shoves his face in the snow-_

_Which Grimmjow most definitely will not take lying down!_

_Game over! What the does his rival think he's doing anyway._

_With an angry roar that could due a King of the panthers proud, Grimmjow knocks the smaller teen off and then pins his rival down with a fierce glare-not caring that if the princess wrists will surely bruise._

"_What the fuck is your problem, Kurosaki?"_

_All hissing and snarls and then the other youth once again reminds Grimmjow that they are equally matched in strength._

_More snow goes up his nose and his head starts to swim and it takes Grimmjow another moment to realize that the strawberry princess might actually be trying to kill him-_

_And then a mouth is at his ear and despite the situation Grimmjow can't help but grin inwardly because angry or not-ready to kill him or not-his rival can't seem to keep his hands off him-_

'_**Merry Christmas to me!'**_

_The grin quickly dies out-the little bastard of a hell cat is no longer satisfied with repeatedly pounding his head into the snow-Kurosaki has a death grip on his hair and the orange haired youth is pulling-pulling so damn hard on the locks-forcing his head to snap painfully and Grimmjow is sure he most look like a fuckin' pathetic idiot right now letting his rival get the upper hand and he let's out a warning growl of his own _

"_Don't test me, Kurosaki!"_

_But the youth isn't listening and Grimmjow actually draws blood when he bites back the wince that threatens to take over-a knee is digging in his spine now and the mouth at his ear finally produces human speech rather than animalistic growls "If you ever __**EVER**__ attack my brother like that again I promise, I swear to you Grimmjow I will fucking bury you six feet under!"_

_Isn't the princess being just a tad bit dramatic?_

_Grimmjow rolls his eyes "So my anger got the best of me-whatcha want me to do about it?"_

_There is a moment of silence-a moment when the iron tight hold is loosened and Grimmjow takes this opportunity to flip the switch-only he's not nearly satisfied with simply pinning his rival under him like normal-no he wants the little shit to feel pain!_

_And then he falters when he sees the dark shadows under brilliant brown orbs-Kurosaki looks like he hasn't slept a wi__**n**__k._

_What the fuck is going on? Is it possible that the puddle of crimson really was as bad as it looked-had Kurosaki's twin almost died?_

_Grimmjow felt sick to his stomach._

_Sure he'd done some shitty things-but to almost kill some one._

"_**FUCK!"**_

()()()

Someone was shaking him-

"Grimmjow-san, are you alright?"

Of course he was fuckin all-

Damn. Damn. Damn.

How the hell could a fuckin' memory affect him so greatly after all this time?

"I need some air. You stay here and get cozy I'll be back in a bit."

"Wait! What do you mean you need some a-

(SLAM)

TBC


	7. Chapter FIVE

**Disclaimer: I can never hope to be the genius man that is Kubo-sensei I can only play around with his boys or more accurately make them play with each other. **

A/N I have no decent excuse for the large gap between up dates but those of you who have stepped into the world of Drunken SeaHorse I hope that you will stick around because no this is not abandoned and yes it is going somewhere.

For Ane-chan: In honor of the month in which our bond was solidified.

Warnings: AU, OOC, Spelling, language, grammar, punctuation, crack, drama, fluff, run-on's, flashbacks, sprinklings of nudity and citrus, switching views, etc

Pairings: GrimmIchi, ShiroQuiorra, RukiHime, SzaRen, mentions of OthersIchi, mentions GrimmOthers, TBA

Quick recap: Consumed by thoughts of his long lost forgotten rival, Ichigo does not register that he has been stripped of his clothes until his shameless and perverted cousin pinches his bare behind and snickers at his predicament. And later that night not too far away on the other side of town… haunted by a not so pleasant memory in his past, Grimmjow storms off in order to clear his head and get his whirling emotions under control…

Drunken SeaHorse

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**SIDE A**

(Grimmjow)

Alcohol. Ah the sure-fire cure for the pain. Grimmjow can almost taste it on his tongue, making his lips and the roof of his mouth tingle.

It is perhaps not the best but it is indeed the most effective way to forget.

Forget the humiliation-completely losing face in front of not just his roommate, not just his acquaintances but his former rival's-Kurosaki's fucking sisters-which was almost as bad as losing face in front of the not so little orange haired bastard himself.

Grimmjow would like to punch a wall but that would require stopping.

Stopping is not an option. It is not even something to remotely consider.

With the wind at his back he runs and runs and runs like he hasn't in years.

His electric blue eyes set straight ahead. There is no looking back-no dwelling on the past. Forward is the only way to go.

There is not much light on this side of town but for Grimmjow it is no different than if he were running during the day.

He does not feel hindered or crippled in anyway. If anything his sight as well as the rest of his senses have heightened further.

And he is no longer a man but a creature of the night.

The King of Panthers.

If he dared to jump a fence-scale the side of a building-climb a lamp post-throw his head back and release a primal roar-a mating call.

Grimmjow knows that he would sooner find himself being carried off to the nearest mental institution than have his long lost rival appear before him-all burning eyes and fierce scowl.

The screeching of tires hauls Grimmjow back into the present-into reality-the headlights on the vehicle momentarily blinding him-making the blue eyed male hiss violently.

Grimmjow may not have fangs or claws but it damn sure won't stop him from ripping the door off and beating the shitty little bastard/stupid bitch with in an inch of their pathetic little lives it won't stop him from...

"Well, well Grimmjow Jeagerjaques fancy running into you," familiar light semi-mocking laughter reaches his ears making the slightly pointed appendages twitch "-almost literally."

The window is rolled down.

And Grimmjow can feel bile rise up in his throat.

Clenching and unclenching his fist-his lips curling into a snarl as he takes in those rich, dark glossy raven-colored locks, that pale heart shaped face and wide silver blue eyes.

She hasn't changed much since he last saw her.

"_Kuchiki, Rukia_."

The door opened and the slim raven-haired woman stepped out of the car, carefully shutting it.

"My what a scary snarl. I'd almost think you didn't like me."

Was she fucking serious? Of course he couldn't stand her. She was part of the reason he never got to speak to Kurosaki again. Kuchiki and that fucking big breasted cheerleader constantly clinging to the other boy like fucking leaches!

Grimmjow had tried to shrug it off-jealous ha as fucking if he had ever been jealous!

Damn. He really could go for that drink now but before Grimmjow could continue on towards his intended destination he had to figure out what the little raven wanted from him.

Obviously she wanted something since she had reached out and taken hold of his arm when he made a move to turn and leave.

Grimmjow considered breaking said fucking hand that had taken told of his arm-could imagine crushing the tiny bones with his much larger hand but there was only so much his former rival could let him get away with before he made good on his promise and buried him six feet under and then some.

_Grimmjow grinned as a more appealing image came to mind-wrestling the other boy (nope man-yes because they were older now) wrestling the other man on top of the fresh soil in a graveyard during a summer night just like this one, the moonlight shining on their half naked forms-yes a simple pair of boxers or briefs would be more than enough._

_Sure graveyards could be a little bit creepy at times but…_

_The chances of an angry spirit or spirits coming out and attacking them was pretty slim-especially in such a peaceful town like Karakura._

The most appealing part of this new fantasy playing out in his mind now was getting his rival nice and dirty.

_Grimmjow could recall now even while he had been watching/stalking Kurosaki during their highschool years the guy was never dirty-even when he was covered in sweat his strawberry smelled fresh and slightly sweet putting the most hygienic of chicks and the cleanest of babies to shame-not that babies were all that clean most of the time._

_He scratched his hairless chin in thought trying to recall if his rival ever actually produced sweat-surely he must have right? _

_But as Grimmjow raked his brain he couldn't remember seeing a single sweat stain on those too tight tees the orange-haired boy insisted on wearing underneath his uniform or during his free time. And it was the same with the ass tight blue jeans too-every one else grumbled about the heat and how uncomfortable it was and yet his rival had never seemed the least bit fazed._

_Even during their most violent fist fights and rough encounters something about Kurosaki seemed so fucking pure. So untainted-damn near untouchable._

_It was one of Grimmjow's missions in life-he vowed to get his rival not just dirty but down right FLITHY!_

_It wouldn't end with mud or blood not it would go beyond that point if he had his way._

_And he would damn sure have his way!_

_Maybe once their relationship was reestablished and all apologies and confessions were made he could convince Ichigo-yes he would probably call Kurosaki by his first name by that point-to play around in a morgue or a hospital._

_They'd both would have to be careful of course what with deadly diseases and infections and all that but…_

_Negative and gross thoughts aside on to more pleasant things maybe he could get his strawberry to put on a little nurses uniform?_

_It wasn't an original concept exactly but a nice little fantasy all the same._

_Not that the "costume" would stay on long or the rest of his former rival's clothes for that matter._

_Maybe they could get a little kinky with the ex-ray machine while they were there and he could keep a copy, put it in a frame and hang it up in their bedroom as a reminder._

_Then when they turned old and gray and Grimmjow could not longer get it up with out Viagra or some other magical drug he could look at the ex-ray of their skeletal forms and_-

"I always wondered what Ichigo would say if he found out that you daydream almost as much as he does."

Bitch! Way to spoil his little fantasy session.

Not that Grimmjow had forgotten that the raven was there or anything-not with the way she was digging her fucking nails into his left bicep!'

Still he felt a little off guard and mentally cursed himself.

Electric blues narrowed to thin slits "Is there something you wanted Kuchiki cuz if not I'd like you to take your fucking claws out of my damn arm now!"

"Oh what's the matter Jeagerjaques? I thought you liked a little bit of pain to go along with pleasure, it makes you feel alive isn't that what you always used to tell Ichigo?"

Grimmjow chewed on the inside of his cheek hard enough to puncture the skin and taste the tang of his own blood.

What went on between him and his former rivals should have stayed between them-it pissed him off royally that Kuchiki knew something so…well not personal perse but special…something that made their rivalry what it was.

Defined their connection.

If Grimmjow was the fire than Kurosaki was the water-good ole opposites attract and all that jazz-course there were other times when his rival would act more like an inferno…blazing wildly like a fucking…

"Hey you could at least answer my question before you start spacing out again."

FUCK!

"Alright Kuchiki, talk fast what the hell do you want? What are you doing here? I know your type," a sneer "You didn't just almost turn me into fucking road kill on a whim so what the hell do you want?"

"…"

"If you've come here to lecture me about what a stupid ass idea it is to go to Kurosaki's coming out party, then you might as well hold your breath because nothin' can stop me from going-hell even in death I would still come for him because he's MINE!"

Grimmjow's neck snapped to the left when a curled fist met his face-he licked his bottom lip almost impressed with the little raven but then he remembered that he'd seen her get into brawl a time or to back during highschool-no bitch slaps or hair pulling from this dark hellion-Kuchiki fought like a warrior-not that he'd tell the bitch this.

She was no longer wearing a playful smile on her face "You can hate me, glare at me as much as you want but you will NOT talk to me like I'm one of your brainless whores!" A pause for breath "Ichigo is practically like a brother to me and I'm sure even a cocky jerk like you can remember just how important family is to him-you fuck with his loved ones you're gonna get burned!"

Grimmjow spat a small glob of blood just missing the lil woman's overpriced boots by a quarter of an inch.

"And stop snarling so damn much! We're going to be seeing a lot of each other soon so you might as well get used to it."

What the f-

What the hell was Kuchiki talking about?

The dancing light was back in her silver-blue orbs

"Did you have a question? You'll get your answer all in good time Grimmjow." She flicked a lash off of her otherwise flawless cheek and rubbed her belly (he raised a brow at this and tempting though the idea was he wasn't sure he'd survive if he made a crack about how she seemed to be a little bit curvier compared to the last time he saw her-course this would be a lie but women were always overly sensitive about their weight and he thought maybe he could end this little reunion because surely she'd have no interest in harassing him if he insulted her right?)

"I don't know about you but I think this getting reacquainted session calls for a drink."

She couldn't be fuckin' serious she didn't honestly expect him to-

"Listen Kuchiki-

"It wasn't a request you WILL go to the bar with me even if I have to drag you there."

A snort "As if you could."

Silver-blues flashed "You'd be surprised of what Kuchiki's are capable of, don't let this angelic face fool you."

Angelic? HA!

"I doubt angels run over innocent pedestrians."

The familiar mocking laughter that he so was not fond of reached his ears "Innocent? Ha, ha, ha that's a good one!" Rukia stepped further into Grimmjow's face and poked him in the ribs "Nah I'd say you were the type who probably watched your first porno before you even reached puberty and I'm betting you received your first blow job before you even really knew what it meant to "cum" and if I had to guess I'd say you lost your virginity at 13 or 14-probably 13 since you were already a dick by the time you set foot in Karakura Town."

"I don't know why the fuck you're so damn interested in my sex life or whatever Kuchiki but if we're going to the damn bar, you're buying."

"Surely you jest Grimmjow," the woman unlocked the doors and motioned for him to get in and then went around to the other side. "Unless there's something you forgot to mention-should Ichigo be informed? He'll be so disappointed to hear that his number one rival is really a chick popped up on steroids," silver-blues raked over his form "Just how much do you bench press these days?"

What the fuck was this? Grimmjow was not only pissed he was feeling out right fucking confused which only increased his anger.

And then it dawned on him.

This was a test. A trial...Kuchiki was fucking with him because she was feeling him out-seeing if he was truly worthy.

For the first time that night since almost getting run over Grimmjow cracked a smile now knowing that somehow-everything would work out just as he wanted it to.

Friday couldn't get here soon enough in his opinion.

"Keys, Kuchiki."

A raised brow "You expect me to give you my keys?"

"Hey you said it yourself. I'm the man and if I'm paying then I'm also driving. Now keys."

()()

Surely Kuchiki had to be joking. She didn't honestly expect him to go into a bar with bunch of uncouth buffoons who scratched their balls and grabbed their junk did she?

Grimmjow didn't even want to know why Kuchiki had picked such a place-the bar was jam-packed with American tourists-not that he hated American tourists perse he just didn't care for them much.

"We're not drinking here, Kuchiki."

"Yes we are, now name your poison!"

()()

"A big strong man like you pouting in a bar? I almost wish I brought my videocamera."

Grimmjow downed his coke and rum before snapping his fingers and ordering another fully intending to ignore the little annoying raven woman at his side.

"So you want to know the reason for my asking you to sit and drink with me?"

He shot her a glare "I really could care less."

Rukia's laughter was as mocking as ever and although far from loud in volume because of Grimmjow's oversensitive ears, Kuchiki's voice was seemed like it practically drowned out the awful music that was playing in the bar.

She continued "I'm here because when I spoke to Renji earlier he seemed very upset and confused and although he didn't give me all the details it doesn't exactly take a genius to figure it out."

A snort and Grimmjow downed his second glass of coke and rum "Nothing new there," an eye roll "Abarai has always been over emotional about everything. Sometimes I'm convinced he's with Szayel because it makes it a little easier to forget."

Rukia raised a brow "Forget what exactly? As far as I know you and Renji were never really all that close-hell you could barely stand one another and yet- she paused a took a sip from her cranberry vodka (what kind of idiot sipped their fucking alcohol and with a damn straw?) "Renji told me that you and him hang out at least 2 or 3 times a week. Told me that you've crashed on his couch a number of times-told me that even though you're an asshole you're not such a bad guy. Now the first thought to cross my mind when I heard all of this was Renji is crushing on you HARD-FUCKING-CORE. But then I saw the way he looked at those pictures of Ichigo and-

Why was Kuchiki telling him something that he already knew?

What the hell was she expecting him to say?

"Abarai is a sap. Even if Kurosaki had ever looked his way their relationship would have never lasted-more to the point Kurosaki would have only agreed to date the dumb gorilla out of obligation because that's the kind of guy Kurosaki is."

Rukia slammed her hand on top of the bar and her voice dropped to a chilling degree "Ichigo would never do something selfish and cruel and the fact that you would even suggest such a thing proves that you haven't really grown up much at all."

Grimmjow watched as the little raven got up from the bar and walked over to the one of the pool tables.

Kuchiki didn't seem intimidated or uncomfortable in the least even though she was surrounded by sweaty tobacco spitting foul-mouthed American tourists who looked like they could easily chew her to pieces.

Americans-the fuckers-could be a bit too touchy feely when they had alcohol in their systems.

As Grimmjow moved towards the group with the intention to save Kuchiki, something caught his eye-something all too familiar dangling around the woman's' neck.

A thin chain with a skull shaped pendant.

He ground his teeth together barely suppressing the growl which was threatening to rise up in him

Why the fuck was Kuchiki wearing Kurosaki's necklace?!

_FLASHBACK_

_Kurosaki was often surrounded by both guys and girls-comrades and rivals alike seemed to flock to the boy like flies on shit. Only if Kurosaki was shit then he was by far the single most sweetest smelling shit Grimmjow had ever encountered._

_IT wasn't like the Kurosaki doused himself in cologne or bath products-it was more like a scent that was sweet but not sickening with a hint of powder-like freshness. Grimmjow tried not to think too much on it. Still not quite ready to come to terms with the dreams he's been having lately as well as the unnatural desire to do a hell of a lot more than verbally taunt his rival._

_Grimmjow found himself seething with anger and the beginning of what he believed might very well be jealousy at the sight of all the laughing idiots crowding closely around Kurosaki. _

_The orange haired boy had taken a weekend trip up to some old abandoned tombs in the sands or mountains or something with his family and his friends and fanclub were anxious to hear all about it. _

_Hell they were so damn closely huddled-the fuckers-they could probably smell (almost taste) what the person next to them ate for breakfast that same morning-with Kurosaki in the center and Kuchiki-_

_Grimmjow bit back a snarl fucking Kuchiki and her triple ass (she didn't have an ounce of fat on her body but it made him feel a little bit better about the situation) sitting in Kurosaki's lap-her arms wrapped around Kurosaki's neck as she laughed and pinched his cheeks in a playful manner every couple of minutes. _

_Once again Grimmjow felt something in him stir and quickly stomped it down when Szayel and Ilfort shot him questioning looks._

_Kurosaki certainly didn't seem to be having any objections to having his space so heavily crowded by his adoring fanbase but he also made no move or motion to pull the raven-haired girl closer or even touch her back-still…just because Kurosaki didn't appear to be touching Kuchiki didn't mean that he wasn't since afterall who said he had to touch the girl with his hands?_

_Grimmjow dug his nails into his palms nearly drawing blood as the image of Kurosaki's clothed hard-on pressing into Kuchiki's bubble butt entered his mind just then. _

_He could feel his banana pudding starting to come back up and decided to look away._

_Although it wasn't long before he was looking in his rivals direction once again and much to his annoyance (that was putting it lightly) Kuchiki decided to take her playful petting one step further-slipping her hand underneath the orange haired youth's collar and-_

_Grimmjow had picked up lip reading at an early age. Back when he was just a toddler actually and it stuck with him…he watched lavender tinted lips move and form the words_

"_**Jewelry is meant to be seen, Ichigo. What's the point in wearing it if you're not going to show it off?"**_

_**Kurosaki responded by telling the girl **_

"_**I wish you wouldn't touch me so casually all the time Rukia," he hissed "You're going to give everyone the wrong idea."**_

_**Kuchiki scoffed "Then their even bigger idiots then you are," and then she slipped off Kurosaki's lap and moved down by the big breasted cheerleader.**_

_**Grimmjow felt a moment of triumph until he noted that despite the strawberry's grumbles of protest he made no move or motion to tuck the item back inside his collared shirt-in addition seemed Kuchiki's actions had attracted the boys' fanbase once more.**_

_**Each one of them anxious to get a look at the shiny necklace.**_

_**Grimmjow decided that this would be the ideal opportunity to make his move!**_

_**()()**_

"_Only bitches and queens wear necklaces so I guess that only leaves one question: Which one are you?"_

_Grimmjow unfortunately didn't get the immediate response he had been hoping for-hell his damn rival hadn't even taken notice of him-rather the other boy was deeply engaged in conversation with some little puke! _

_The youngest of the fanboys-the smallest damn freshman in the school! Damn kid was probably a prodigy or something-hell he could barely pass for 10 let alone 13 or 14._

_Grimmjow chewed on the inside of his cheek._

_Right. On to plan B then._

_Demanding that his rival pay attention to him even if it meant getting physical._

_A grin. Actually plan B was always more satisfying._

_He examined the necklace for a moment-the chain didn't look very heavy it would be all too easy to snap it right off Kurosaki's neck-probably would leave pretty little red welts on his peach toned-wait don't finish that thought! Right fuck it just snatch it and…_

"_BASTARD WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"_

_Once again Grimmjow did not get the reaction he had been hoping for-or it would be more accurate to say the reaction was about right however the person reacting was not Kurosaki but that fucking redheaded overgrown gorilla._

_Electric blues narrowed "MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS ABARAI, GO BRAID YOUR FUCKIN' PUBES OR SOMETHIN!"_

_The tattooed redheads' cheeks puffed up and he narrowed his beady reddish brown eyes and crackled his knuckles-foolishly sizing Grimmjow up-didn't matter if the fucker had an inch or two on him Grimmjow wasn't intimidated in the least!_

_It was true that Abarai was tall for a Japanese male but back in Canada pre-teens looked like fucking full-grown mountain men! NO COMPARISON!_

"_THE HELL I WILL-YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST COME OVER HERE AND-_

_Grimmjow stuck a finger in his ear "What's that buzzing noise? Oh yeah its you." And then he shoved the redhead none-too-gently._

_Course this didn't stop Abarai from attempting to take a swing at him-Grimmjow easily dodged this blow as well as the ones that followed._

_But of course the gorilla didn't down back then either-only came back for more. _

_Grimmjow was growing bored at this time and decided to shut the redhead up with a solid punch to the face. _

_A few brows were raised but no one made any move to defend Abarai-wait no there was one-Kurosaki's obedient shaggy dog_ _Yasutora-_

_Truthfully Grimmjow didn't have a problem with the guy since there was actually nothing puppish about his appearance or his personality at all…the nickname actually came from his hair and the fact that he and Kurosaki were best friends and he went out of his way to defend the smaller boy at all costs._

_Necklace still grasped firmly between his fingers he decided to ignore the usually quiet teen in favor of redirecting his attention to his rival._

_Grimmjow decided he was just going to stand behind Kurosaki-say nothing-do nothing-just stand there like looming a shadow and then dangle the necklace in front of the boys' face._

_There's wasn't a single doubt in his mind. No way could Kurosaki ignore him now._

"_You really should be more careful with your treasures, Kurosaki."_

_Well a few words wouldn't hurt could it?_

_There was only mild irritation in the orange haired youths' tone as he turned and FINALLY acknowledged him. _

"_Is there something you wanted Grimmjow? Or have you added kleptomania to your daily routine along with harassment and physical assaults?"_

_It wasn't the reaction he was looking for at all. In fact it was so unexpected Grimmjow felt positively baffled for a moment and when he felt his face go flush at being caught off guard-feeling completely out of his element he scowled, stomped it down and snapped back to his senses._

'_**What the hell is-?'**_

_FLASH END_

_()()_

"**WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU-LET GO OF ME! SOMEBODY PLEASE SAVE ME!"**

A high pitched and exaggerated yell snapped the blue-haired male from his little trip down memory lane.

He didn't even remember reaching the lil raven woman but now he was practically on top of her-okay bad image-bad image-he wasn't on top of Kuchiki but he had taken hold of the chain around her neck-noticed the red mark forming around her neck from where he was pulling-noticed her silver-blues tearing up as she attempted to dig her claws into his hands in order to get him to release his hold.

A bit reluctantly and with 20 or more pairs of eyes watching him Grimmjow let go and stepped back letting Kuchiki catch her breath.

The woman coughed dramatically for a few minutes and then smirked at him "You should at least warn a girl before-

"Shut up Kuchiki and tell me what the hell you're doing with-why the fuck are you wearing that?"

Rukia played with the necklace and acted coy "Whatever do you mean Grimmjow what else would I be doing with it?"

Damn if only she were born with a dick he could beat the shit of her!

"Because it doesn't belong to you."

"True but I'm burrowing it for a short time and Ichigo never has to know."

"Aren't you a little too old to be playing games Kuchiki?"

The raven haired woman didn't answer but turned and headed towards the bar once more.

Rolling his eyes Grimmjow followed her even though he'd had his fill of alcohol for the evening. All he wanted to do now was go home but of course he wouldn't tell Kuchiki this-couldn't let her know that she irritated him to such a degree.

For now Grimmjow decided he would ignore the jewelry still dangling from her neck and then repeated one of his earlier questions "Why are you here?"

Rukia shrugged.

So he asked her a different question.

"Are you the one who sent me the invitation?"

She smirked into her glass of cranberry vodka "Nope."

"Then who sent it?"

"Hmm, someone, two people actually-you saw them just a short while ago actually."

"Kurosaki's sisters?"

"Mmm hmmm Yuzu and Karin-chan care a great deal about Ichigo-he's there dearest onii-chan after all and they want what's best for him," she looked up and pinned him with a stare "The question I have for you is do you think you're worthy enough?"

Was he worthy enough? What kind of asinine question was that? Being with his long lost rival had nothing to do with worth-the bond-the connection they shared far surpassed pointless things like that.

Grimmjow snorted not really surprised that Kuchiki didn't get it-no one seemed to fucking get it!

And maybe it was better that way since no one mattered but his rival anyway.

"Contrary to whatever you might be thinking right now this is not an attack Grimmjow."

Another snort "I don't really care one way or another."

"Sure you act like you don't care-being nonchalant has always been one of your favorite weapons to use but deep down much as it pains you to hear it/think it/feel you know you are just like the rest of us. You're not just some heartless arrogant bastard from overseas."

"Is there a point to all this babbling Kuchiki?"

"If you'd learn to shut your mouth and just listen for once then you would know that this is not just "babbling" as you call it."

Maybe he should go ahead and order another drink after all.

A humorless smirk "Fine, Kuchiki go ahead tell me all about myself. I'm all ears."

Grimmjow had no real intention of listening of course-he should have gone ahead with his first plan and just tuned her out. Ah well better late then never.

"You weren't the only one watching that day you know? I saw you, much like always skulking in the shadows-hiding behind that old tree. I didn't miss the way your eyes narrowed and darkened with a myriad of emotions swirling in each iris-jealousy being only the tip of the iceberg-I saw the way your jaw clenched-the way your whole body tensed up and shook with rage.

Sure you tried to mask it over because you knew that it would be foolish to drop all of your defenses but you never were as clever as you thought yourself to be. I considered my options-considered everything that had happened with in the past few months and in the end I decided that you deserved to be punished. Ichigo and his family firmly believe in forgiveness and second chances-multiple chances really-Kuchiki's on the other hand…" a pause

"We are not as forgiving in fact sometimes we can hold grudges for decades but that is neither here nor there. Despite everything that happened-every thing you did-every last fucking lie or ill spoken word that passed from your lips he still wanted you-no scratch that-he still WANTS YOU! Yes even now-after all this time has passed you are the one who dominates his thoughts-his dreams-his very existence and I hate it-I hate that my best friend can be such an idiotic love sick fool but my desire to see Ichigo happy overrides my hatred."

Well it was kind of hard to ignore a speech like that especially when it greatly concerned his rival as well as confirming some of his previous suspicions about the raven-haired woman.

"Are you giving me like your official blessing or something Kuchiki?"

Silver blues narrowed "Don't test me."

"You really should talk to someone about all that anger Kuchiki it's not healthy for a woman your age you know?"

"This isn't a game Grimmjow if you break Ichigo's heart a second time I will _**rip**_ you apart limb from limb!"

Grimmjow didn't give a flying fuck who the person was he abso-fucking-lutely loathed being lectured! What right did this bitch have to tell him anything-she was just as much to blame for his falling out with Kurosaki as he was!

"Anyway enough with the drama what do you say we go get a cup of coffee and you can finish telling me about your afternoon with Renji?"

The hell?

"What are you bi-polar all of a sudden?"

Rukia tossed her head back and laughed, "Call it what you will either way you're buying me a cup of coffee."

()()

"A western inspired café?"

Rukia nodded "All of the tea houses are closed at this hour and neither of us are dressed appropriately for a nightclub and you can't come back to my place for obvious reasons (really what were these so called obvious reasons? Wait! Who cares?) so a western inspired café it is…well technically its more like a diner but same difference."

Was the lil raven on something because her behavior was beyond strange-she was all over the fucking place!

()()

"I think I'll start with a glass of orange juice and the maybe a southwestern skillet-how bout' you?"

Wait a minute how did a cup of coffee suddenly transform into a late night breakfast?

More importantly why the hell was he still sitting here?

Maybe because he was a tinsy bit curious to find out other useful information Kuchiki might have or know about his long lost rival.

Grimmjow shrugged not feeling all that hungry "Maybe I'll get a slice of pie or peach cobbler or something."

He couldn't really explain it nor did he wish to but something about diners always screamed 'Have some pie!'

It all started years ago back when he was still in his homeland…he'd met a group of European tourists-two brothers-one was 10 years old like him and the other was 8-he couldn't remember much about the duo outside of their love for science, all things strange and unusual and apple pie.

Why Girmmjow was thinking of something so pointless at a time like this he honestly didn't know. Kuchiki's randomness and weirdness was rubbing off on him-that could be the only explanation.

Kuchiki was putting her hand on him again-next time he ran into her he vowed to tie or chain her hands to the nearest surface like a table or a steering wheel maybe then she'd learn to keep said hands to herself.

He narrowed electric blues at her "Kuchiki if you don't remove your hand right this minute I might just have to bite it off!"

Rather than flinching or pulling her hand back the raven-haired woman simply smirked before calmly retracting her hand "Now then I must admit I still feel rather confused about a few things."

"What things?"

Maybe if he hurried up and answered her annoying questions she'd let him leave. Oh how fucking grand that would be.

"Well the relationship between you and Renji for one-when did you guys become so friendly?"

A snort. Again with the moronic gorilla. This was getting real stale real fast.

"We're not friends," _**Just pathetic bastards who share the same obsession only Abarai has decided to settle for second best whereas I will never settle for second anything.**_ "We simply share common interests so don't read into it any deeper than that."

"Hmm," Rukia put her finger to her lips looking decidedly thoughtful "Would it be better to say that you and Renji are bed-bunnies then?"

Bed Bunnies.

"What the fuck is that?"

The smirk returned to the raven's face "Bed. Couch. Futon. Rug. It's pretty much the same in the end isn't it-or gets the job done."

"Do you want me to inflict bodily pain on you Kuchiki because you are really pushing it?"

Rukia reached for the sugar and poured some into her glass of orange juice "Not at all," a smile "I reserve all masochistic like tendencies for my Hime and my Hime alone but perhaps we could arrange something one day where you could come and watch."

Grimmjow nearly choked on his first bite of pie.

"No thanks."

"Suit yourself."

"…"

"…"

"I don't have time to sit here and stare at you all night Kuchiki hurry up and finish asking your stupid questions!"

"Now Grimmjow why would I ask you more questions when you haven't even properly answered my first one."

Letting out an aggravated growl Grimmjow downed his first cup of coffee-(not giving a shit if it was too hot and burned his throat on the way down) and then slammed the cup back down and began his story…

()()

_FLASH BACK_

_"Alright now that we've all had our fill of greasy goodness let's get down to the real reason we have asked you to join us on this lovely afternoon shall we?"_

_Szayel was grinning too fucking bright-what the hell was he up to?_

_Electric blues flicked over to Ilfort who really hadn't paid the group any attention the entire time they were there-in fact the blond didn't even seem to care about what his twin wished to announce-much rather continue fiddling around with his I phone._

_Grimmjow shrugged not really giving a damn about banana boy anyway-he looked to Abarai who was glaring down at his empty water glass._

_He took note of the lopsided ponytail and a book of some sort clutched beneath the redheads' arms._

_"You can glare at the empty glass all you wanna Abarai it won't instantly produce more water."_

_The tattooed males head shot up and he glared at Grimmjow._

_Something that the blue haired male was getting quite fucking sick of!_

_"Alright what the fuck is going on?"_

_A pause and then "Just answer me one question: When you went to Ichigo's house the other day did you see him?"_

"_No."_

_Reddish-brown eyes narrowed. "I don't believe you."_

"_I don't care if you believe me or not Abarai, I didn't see him."_

_The redhead still looked doubtful and Grimmjow resisted the urge to roll his eyes._

"_But you must have seen him I mean you peeked into his window right?"_

_Well that was the original plan but it had quickly been thrown out when Masaki appeared. _

"_I didn't get that far."_

"_What do you mean you didn't get that far? What did you fall asleep or something?"_

"_I know it might come as a great challenge for you but could you possibly try not being such a fucking dumbass for once?"_

_Renji crossed his arms "I'm not an idiot!"_

_Szayel patted the redhead consolingly "Of course not Ren, you merely act idiotic from time to time but it doesn't make me love you any less. You're perfect just the way you are."_

_Grimmjow already felt like gagging at the sight of the couple but the urge to do so increased ten fold when pepto-haired male started playing with his lovers' hair-calmly undoing the lopsided braid._

_He was a bit surprised that the redheaded gorilla wasn't protesting or slapping Szayel's hands away since Abarai's hair was like a fucking priceless treasure to him. He dimly recalled that back in highschool the tattooed male practically shit bricks if anyone even dared to touch his hair-hell sometimes the guy screamed like a girl when someone merely brushed past it on accident._

'_**Heh, guess some things change.'**_

"_If you did not see Kurosaki- then why did you let almost an entire day without returning any of my texts or calls?"_

_Grimmjow stabbed a piece of shrimp with his fork imagining that it was Szayel's head and grinned nastily before saying "You're not my damn mother I don't have to answer the fuckin' phone if I don't fuckin' feel like it."_

_Abarai looked up again. This time the expression on his face was pathetic and pleading "Please, what happened when you went to see Ichigo, just tell me!"_

_Grimmjow dipped the piece of shrimp into the tartar sauce and then popped it in his mouth chewing it slowly before giving the redhead an answer by way of a careless shrug and a few simple words. "I went there. He wasn't home. So I left. That's it!"_

"_You're lying Grimmjow and you aren't even remotely attractive when you lie so please stop doing it."_

_Who the fuck was Szayel to lecture him?_

_Sometimes he didn't know why he kept the bastard around-or hell why he called the pepto-haired prince a friend!_

"_I'm not lying. I went there and spoke to his mother for a few minutes, she informed me that he wasn't there and so I left."_

"_His mother? You spoke to Masaki-san?"_

_Well that was one way to put it…_

"_Grimmjow?"_

_Let's see now what would be the best way to answer this with out looking like a total and complete spaz?_

"_Grimmjow!"_

_When Szayel didn't receive a quick enough response apparently the pink-haired fucker thought it gave him the right to resort to childish antics and kick him-Grimmjow retaliated by slamming his boot clad foot on the other males' pinky toe-not caring in the least if he broke or bruised the bone!_

_Illfort was too enraptured in his cellphone and didn't even spare his twin a glance even though Szayel was practically howling now and as for Abarai?_

_The dumbass just continued to sit there with that pitiful/pleading/expectant look on his face-if he noticed that his lover was in pain he had a funny way of showing it._

_Grimmjow's grin widened and he speared another piece of shrimp "Long story short good ole' Masaki told me to stay away from her darling baby boy if I wasn't serious about starting a relationship, then we went out for coffee and scones and she dropped me off at home."_

_Renji glared at him now "Details, give me details."_

"_Details," a snort "I ordered a strawberry scone with hazelnut cream coffee and she ordered a chocolate scone with-_

"_Not those kinds of details. I mean Ichigo-what did she have to say about Ichigo? What's he look like? What is he doing? Does he ever talk about me? Will he ever forgive me? What can I do to get him to forgive me? Tell me please!"_

_This was becoming more and more pathetic and annoying with each passing minute._

_Grimmjow slammed his fist on the table. "Shut the hell up Abarai-stop acting like a bitch for two fucking minutes and listen to what I'm gonna say cuz I never like to fuckin' repeat myself!"_

_The redhead flinched and then bowed his head obediently, mumbling an apology._

"_Save your fucking sorry's for someone who needs em' because I don't!"_

_Again with another apology._

_And then _

"_I just…I miss him you know? I mean of course you know-well you sort of know but you were never his-I mean yeah you were his rival and stuff but I was his best fucking friend man I mean he was and I was and we were and-_

_Grimmjow took pity on the poor fool for a minute and handed him a napkin "Wipe your face-there's no way even Szayel will wanna kiss you when you've got snot running down it."_

_The redhead flushed crimson and then muttered an angry/embarrassed "Shut up."_

_Simply because Grimmjow could-simply because Grimmjow was who he was and sometimes he couldn't resist reverting back to his old ways he dropped his voice to a seductive purr and leaned over the table "We both know one way you can shut me up don't we __**Renji?"**_

_This only caused the redhead to flush even more "Shut up you idiot-you promised you-you'd never-for fucksakes man Szayel is right here and-_

"_You insult me Ren, you honestly think I'm unaware of what transpired between you and Grimmjow on that night?"_

_If Renji turned any brighter he would match the tacky tablecloth. _

_He waved his hands wildly as he tried to explain himself "It wasn't like that-we were just-I mean I was-yeah it was really me but it didn't start out that way-he tricked me! Well okay to be fair he didn't exactly trick me since I'm the one who-and then he-listen it was never like that-I never had any feelings or some shit for him-I mean look at him he's an asshole and a pervert and so totally and completely not my type which I know what you're thinking why then would I-why did I? Alcohol it fucks with your brain you know? Makes you think all kinds of things-it was just going to be like a harmless prank-things got out of hand and-we just wanted-I just wanted-Ichigo said he didn't want me that way-he didn't like me that way but I thought maybe just maybe he was confused or nervous-the party and everything was-well too be honest I still don't really get why the hell all those damn redheads were there-something to do with jealousy-this bastard he didn't even and I-_

"_Enough Ren what's in the past is in the past. We mustn't dwell on such things but move forward."_

"_Good idea so what's with the book, Abarai?"_

"_Well all this talk about reunions got me thinking about the past and stuff so I went rummaging through my closet and found my old-_

_()()_

_FLASH BACK END_

"Yearbook? So Renji expected you to what reminisce about the past or something?"

"That's pretty much the gist of it Kuchiki, yeah."

"Okay and?"

"And what?"

"And nothin' we chatted a bit more-made fun off random students, called it a day and went our separate ways."

Grimmjow finished off the last of his pie and wiped his mouth with his napkin. "So if you've had your entertainment for the night I'm getting the hell out of here."

"Not so fast. I want to hear more. For example did looking at those old pictures make you feel warm and bubbly inside?"

"Don't compare me to some sort of love sick puppy Kuchiki! What Kurosaki and I had no cheesy photographs or trips down memory lane can properly express it!"

Rukia wiped her mouth and then reapplied her lipstick "Nothin can properly express it you say?" She closed the her compact mirror and tucked her hands beneath her chin "Please do tell me some more I'd really like to know just what was going through your head back then."

The hell he was going to explain his thoughts/his feelings/his fantasies/his heated interactions with his number one rival-especially not to this lil raven woman.

"You're smart Kuchiki I'm sure you can reach your own conclusions-nah scratch that you already did reach em' a long time ago."

"Well I can be wr-

"You don't like me much I get that and believe me there's no love loss here that's for sure but you're not all that bad-hell I might even say it wasn't a complete nightmare practicing my lines with you-don't let it go to your head though."

The woman blinked "I'd almost forgotten all about that," a raised brow "Why is it you remember something like that?"

Grimmjow grinned, "Because I remember the bet that we made on that one afternoon."

"What bet?" the raven prompted him to elaborate since she still felt confused.

"Oh surely you haven't forgotten about such an unforgettable bet Kuchiki?"

"If you're referring to first or second year of highschool, then yes I forget-care to refresh my memory?"

"There's no fun in telling you but I'll give you a hint: Cheerleading outfit."

There was a moments pause and then the raven was snickering "Of course hahaha how could I have-that was quite the bet wasn't it?"

"Bet your ass it was!"

"Yeah its too bad neither of us won in the end though."

"Yeah."

"…"

"So what now?"

"Now I'm calling it a night." Grimmjow stood up and pulled out a small wad of cash and set it on the table. "See you 'round, Kuchiki."

"See you Friday, Grimmjow."

()()

A few hours later after flipping absentmindedly through channel after channel and finding nothing worth watching on the television Grimmjow felt his eyes become heavy-he pulled a thin sheet over his ankles-it was the only part of his body that was ever cold during the summer months-and drifted off to sleep…not at all surprised that he was once again dreaming of the past…

END CHAPTER FIVE SIDE A…STAY TUNED FOR SIDE B


	8. Chapter FIVE B

Disclaimer: There aren't any Seahorses in BLEACH as of yet and I doubt there ever will be so I am still not Kubo-sensei!

A/N Thought I'd make you wait long again, nope not this time. Anyway here's SIDE B Of chapter 5

_**Drunken Seahorse**_

_**(Grimmjow)**_

_**Although why he was dreaming of this particular moment in time when he could have been dreaming of something much more enjoyable Grimmjow didn't know.**_

_**Dreams didn't always make sense and often when he dreamed there was a grayish blue fog and he'd find himself wandering through an abandoned hallwas until the door appeared…**_

_**Said door was a bit difficult to pry open this time around which was stupid because it was his fucking dream taking place inside of his fucking mind-Grimmjow had to use a good deal of his strength in order to enter and once he did…**_

_**()()**_

"_**You are still having problems connecting with your classmates and I'm just not sure what do with you anymore."**_

_**Grimmjow spit his chewed piece of blue colored gum up at the ceiling, grinning when it landed right next to the orange colored piece of gum he spat up there just a few days ago.**_

_**Same old story. Different day. Yama-jii was at it once again.**_

_**Sitting behind his grand oak desk curling his old decrepit fingers through his long gray beard, staring the blue-haired teen down as he puffed his old fashioned pipe.**_

"_**Before your mother passed away I made a promise to her that I would ensure you receive the very best education."**_

_**Grimmjow popped another piece of gum in his mouth before leaning back in his chair (hell it might as well have been his chair since he sat in it so damn much) with his arms tucked behind his head "I don't know what you wanna hear from me gramps. I already told you this country and this school ain't for a guy like me so don't waste your breath!"**_

_**Yamamoto rubbed the sides of his temple "I wish you would stop acting so childish and listen to reason."**_

_**An eye roll.**_

"_**And another thing I don't know where this habit of disregarding your Japanese heritage came from but cease and desist."**_

_**Another eye roll "You done?"**_

"_**No I am not done I haven't even started yet."**_

_**Grimmjow let out a bored yawn. **_

"_**Tell me do you even know anything aside from simple greetings and insults?"**_

_**Grimmjow rolled his blue eyes a third time and blew a bubble. If that's what Yama-jii thought-let the miserable old man continue to think that way.**_

"_**You are just as much a Japanese youth as you are a Canadian so you need to start acting like it! And how many times do I have to tell you to stop putting your feet on top of my desk?" With these words/lecture a wrinkled yet deceptively strong hand slapped said foot off the desk.**_

_**Grimmjow snorted and shrugged not giving a damn one way or another. **_

_**The old man let out a groan "Why do I even bother?" a deep defeated sigh "Fine do what you want-wear what you want-say what you want and date whoever you want. It's partially your mothers' fault for not teaching you proper discipline. At the very least can you promise me that you will bring up your grades? We both know you can do better than an 82 percent."**_

"_**Sure, why the hell not."**_

_**Even though Grimmjow said these words he didn't plan on following through-he just wanted the old man to get off his back for a little while-all though that always proved to be downright impossible.**_

_**Yamamoto smiled obviously pleased with his grand son's answer. **_

'_**Sucker!'**_

"_**Moving on I know that you recently signed up for track but that only uses up what 2, 3 hours at best?"**_

_**Grimmjow cocked a brow, wondering where the geezer was going with this.**_

_**He liked to run so what? It wasn't like he was aspiring to be a world class champion or anything-he hoped that wasn't where Yama-jii was headed with this little speech of his.**_

"_**You still have plenty of free time on your hands-too much free time."**_

"_**Yeah and?"**_

"_**Every year this school puts on a performance, this year it will be a theatrical performance."**_

_**No. NO. OH HELL FUCKING NO! There was no way in hell Grimmjow was going to be caught dead in some frilly shirt and fancy tights!**_

_**Just because he's been having far from normal thoughts about another boy lately did not make him some sort of fag!**_

"_**You're out of your mind, old man!"**_

"_**I assure you I am perfectly sane."**_

_**Grimmjow scoffed and popped another bubble.**_

"_**This isn't a request Grimmjow. You will join the drama club and you will do whatever it takes to become King."**_

"_**King? King of what? What kinda shit you smokin' gramps do I look like some spotlight poster boy to you?"**_

"_**Even though you pretend like you enjoy hiding in the shadows and distance yourself from others we both know you secretly love the spotlight."**_

"_**The hell I do!"**_

_**He did not-he was not some kind of fucking spotlight whore! Just who the hell did this old man think he was dealing with?**_

"_**Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?"**_

"_**My grandson and I expect that you will do your best to make me proud-make your mother proud."**_

_**Grimmjow's expression softened just the slightest. Damn old man he just had to-**_

"_**But I don't know anything about actin' gramps."**_

_**The old man smiled. "You will learn. For now return to your classes."**_

"_**It's a free period ain't got nowhere to be."**_

"_**I rest my case."**_

"_**The fuck?"**_

"_**You will start today at 3:30pm," the old man paused and reached for a small stack of papers on his desk, then passed them to the blue haired youth.**_

_**Grimmjow skimmed through the lines and then looked back up at Yamamoto for an explanation "What the hell is this?"**_

"_**The script, look it over a bit see if you can get in tune with the characters."**_

_**The hell he was going to waste his precious free time reciting some lines for some damn play!**_

"_**Fine but don't come cryin' to me when no one shows up for this stupid thing of yours."**_

"_**It's not my script. It was written by one of our top students Habari Nato. He has very bright mind and quite the imagination."**_

"_**Yeah, yeah good for him." Grimmjow stood up feeling quite tempted to kick his chair at the old man but held back-it really wouldn't do the youth any good to land himself in a month of detention when track season just started. **_

_**He shoved the script in his bag and stormed out the room with out so much as a "thank you" or "See ya" or anything. **_

_**Then once Grimmjow spotted the nearest trash can he tossed the script inside and walked on…**_

_**()()**_

_**Only to regret his actions a few hours later as he joined his school mates for drama. **_

_**It must have been 96 fucking degrees inside the auditorium-at least he could have used the stacks of paper as a makeshift fan if he hadn't thrown it away.**_

_**Electric blue eyes surveyed the area seeing if he spotted any one worthy. Grimmjow's lip curled in a snarl when the half Russian girl with sea-green colored hair grinned and waved at him. **_

_**Nel. She hadn't seemed all that bad at first but then she started hanging around with those brainless big-breasted cheerleaders, Grimmjow quickly changed his mind since girls like Nel were really only good for one thing and one thing only.**_

_**He turned away with a sneer and then spotted Kuchiki, Asano and some other no name idiotic fanboy of Kurosaki's and rolled his eyes.**_

_**Great not only was he stuck taking a class that was a fucking waste of time but he also had to look at Kuchiki and co ugly faces for the next month and a half.**_

_**Fuck me!**_

_**Grimmjow selected a chair towards the back near the Grantz twins although he wasn't actually in the mood to sit with them, in truth he wanted to be left alone. So he barely spared Szayel and Illfort a glance when they nodded in his direction.**_

_**This (as always) did not discourage the twins. They picked up their book bags and moved closer to him.**_

_**But were smart enough to not actually speak to him unless he spoke to them first.**_

"_**So where's the teacher?"**_

"_**Late as always," Szayel flicked his pepto-pink colored bangs out of his face. "What brings you here Grimmjow?"**_

_**As if he was going to reveal the real reason for his appearance "I don't need a fuckin' reason I'll do whatever I want whenever I want."**_

_**There was a certain glint behind the bespectacled teens eyes as though he did not entirely buy Grimmjow's answer but Szayel said nothing further.**_

_**A moment later the blue haired teen broke the silence "So how does this work anyway? We recite Shakesphere or some other dead guy and then dress up in dorky costumes and dance around on stage or somethin'?"**_

_**Illfort snorted, "Not exactly but you're not far off."**_

"_**Hn, right well I'm gonna close my eyes for a bit, wake me if something interestin' happens."**_

"_**Define interesting?"**_

_**A careless shrug "I don't know just tell me if the school catches on fire or somethin' otherwise don't wake me."**_

"_**Don't be ridiculous Grimmjow you can't just fall asleep in a class like this."**_

_**Grimmjow ignored Szayel and shut his eyes.**_

_**But not for long because a laugh, a laugh which couldn't be described as anything less than infectious reached his ears. **_

_**Grimmjow turned and sure enough there was the overgrown gorilla walking in with Kurosaki trailing closely behind.**_

_**Grimmjow tried to ignore the odd feeling in his chest when his rival playfully shoved Abarai.**_

_**But it wasn't exactly easy.**_

_**()()**_

_**The drama teacher was a heavy-set man with a pink mustache who looked to be around 50 or 60 years of age. He was wearing an ivy-green colored suit and pink socks.**_

_**Grimmjow snorted "You've got to be fucking kiddin' me-this guy is a joke!"**_

"_**You there young man in the back, what is your name?"**_

_**Grimmjow grinned, "Who me?"**_

_**Let the record show that Grimmjow did not like to be singled out of a crowd. In fact he fucking loathed it and if this "Hachi-sensei" thought he was going to get away with doing it-the man had another thing coming.**_

"_**Yes you. No talking while I am talking and if you have to use the bathroom then you need to raise your hand and I will pass you the magic staff."**_

_**Was this guy fucking for real?**_

_**Electric blues flashed "Or I've got a better idea you shut your fuckin' fat ass or I'll take the magic staff from you and shove it up your rectum."**_

_**The guy reminded him of a pig just then as his whole face turned red and his pudgy fists shook "Now listen here y-**_

_**Grimmjow stuck a finger in his ear and mocked the older man "What's that sensei I don't speak pig."**_

_**Half the class laughed while the other half gasped in shock.**_

"_**Knock it off Grimmjow, stop being an ass!"**_

_**Kurosaki's speed could rival his own if and when the orange haired youth really felt like running. **_

_**Not that there was a lot of room to run in a fucking overstuffed auditorium course that hadn't stopped his rival from trying. Nostrils flaring, scowl painted on his peach tinted face the little bastard was actually shielding "Hachi-sensei" now.**_

_**It was a little overboard considering Grimmjow hadn't even moved all that far from his seat-there was still a good couple of feet between him and the drama teacher.**_

"_**And the lil' strawberry princess comes to save the day again." A sneer "Bet you fit right in since you're all about the drama and puttin' on a show eh Kurosaki?"**_

_**Brown eyes pinned blue "What the hell are you even doing here Grimmjow? Wouldn't you rather be torturing alley cats or whatever?"**_

_**Grimmjow was not amused. He happened to be a major fan of cats and not just because certain parts about his physical appearance resembled one. **_

"_**Alright enough, settle down and find your seats everyone. We are going to start now."**_

_**()()**_

_**It shouldn't have come as a complete surprise to Grimmjow but it did-in fact (not that he would admit it out loud) but he was quite blown away with Kurosaki's little performance.**_

_**There was such a passion and fire as the other boy recited lines from the scene he had selected from the stupid script.**_

_**A part of Grimmjow felt irritated because the lines were fucking dumb and cheesy as hell and he was quite convinced that a group of grade schoolers could have produced something much better but at the same time…much like the rest of the class and Hachi-sensei Grimmjow couldn't take his eyes off the other youth and so he let his mind drift for a moment.**_

_**If anyone could pull off a frilly shirt and tights and dance around on stage and still manage to maintain a boyish charm, Kurosaki would be the one to pull it off. **_

_**Hell the strawberry princess could probably just stand there dressed as a lamppost or a tree and still manage to steal the show.**_

_**The boy had obviously taken some pointers or received lessons because there was something so natural about the way his rival moved and spoke.**_

_**Suddenly this whole acting/drama thing didn't seem like such a waste of time. A light bulb went off in Grimmjow's head and he quickly reached a conclusion.**_

_**His rival was issuing a challenge. He could almost hear what the other boys mocking tone would sound like. Could almost see Kurosaki's ever-present scowl twisting into a cocky smirk.**_

_**And since Grimmjow hated to lose he had no other choice but to answer the challenge. **_

_**He hadn't been lying back in Yama-ji's office. He didn't know shit about acting aside from the old dramas and day time television shows his mother made him watch from time to time before she passed away.**_

_**But he figured it couldn't be that hard. Maybe he'd even get extra credit if he picked a scene and recited it in French?**_

_**Not that he gave a damn about extra credit or the opinion of the fat fuck for a teacher and his idiotic peers but-**_

_**Grimmjow snorted. **_

'_**Right so all I gotta do is find my inner actor.'**_

_**()()**_

_**The goal was simple. He wanted to make Kurosaki feel unsettled, intimidated-Grimmjow was looking forward to seeing the other boy squirm-make his rival second doubt himself-think twice about challenging him.**_

_**But Kurosaki was Kurosaki and Grimmjow was quickly finding out that his usual tactics didn't get the desired reaction rather his rival was watching his performance intently-his attention on unwavering-his eyes unblinking or if the guy did fucking blink it happened too quick for Grimmjow to wrap his mind around it.**_

_**It was really fucking weird. Grimmjow couldn't make sense of it if he tried.**_

_**He didn't even know what he was saying-words just seemed to be spilling from out of his mouth automatically-everything and everyone but his rival had faded away into the back round-**_

_**Suddenly it was just the two of them. **_

_**Staring intently at one another. **_

_**In the back of Grimmjow's mind he knew this wasn't a typical stare down but something grander-a hint-a preview of what would come in the next few months.**_

_**The sound of the bell and the scraping of chairs broke the moment but the feeling-the feeling that had passed between him and his rival in that moment-during those few minutes had not vanished completely.**_

_**Kurosaki was looking at him oddly and Grimmjow didn't like it-not one fucking bit.**_

_**A second bell and then…**_

"_**Very good, very good that's all for today. See you on Thursday next."**_

_**()**_

_**On any other day Grimmjow was one of the first ones out the door for he simply couldn't wait to step out into the fresh air, lean against the school fence and light up a cigarette and think about everything and nothing.**_

_**But today he was not in any rush to run for the exit-rather he lingered behind waiting for-waiting for what exactly?**_

_**Since when did he wait for anyone or anything?**_

_**Grimmjow mentally kicked himself and scowled when his electric blues unconsciously sought out a head of orange hair again and when Kurosaki raised a brow he kicked himself inwardly again 'What the hell is going on?'**_

_**()()**_

_**Only in a dream could Grimmjow jump into the next week on the following Thursday…**_

_**()**_

_**So as not to have a repeat incident Grimmjow had stayed clear of his rival for the next few days as much as humanly possible-when ever Kurosaki would round the corner the blue-haired youth would be sure to back track and go the other way. **_

_**During gym class and track when they were forced to interact Grimmjow would play it as casual-no insults were thrown-no taunts were made-he kept to himself or made sure to drown out the sound of the other boys' voice with a set of head phones. **_

_**It wasn't the best way to handle the situation and Grimmjow damn sure wasn't proud of the choice he had made. **_

_**Running away and avoiding Kurosaki was a coward's game and he was no fucking coward but what other choice did he have?**_

_**The more he tried to shut the strawberry out the more the little bastard seemed to be there.**_

_**And then one not so sunny afternoon…**_

'_**So much for being rivals' **_

_**It was said in a low mutter barely a whisper really-clearly meant for his ears only and Grimmjow had been so deeply in the zone-consumed in his unwanted thoughts that he almost missed the words passing from the other boys' lips. **_

_**They were short simple words and yet held such a great deal of meaning.**_

_**Kurosaki had basically just come out and said that he missed him. And those damn eyes said it all-it was too much-too fucking much and Grimmjow lost it!**_

_**Everything and everyone but his rival faded from his mind-faded from view-faded from all of his senses.**_

_**Grimmjow didn't really know what the hell he was doing or why the hell he was doing it-a part of him felt possessed for what other explanation would there be for his actions?**_

_**He suddenly grabbed the other boy-and he was slammed his rival up against the wall in the hallway where any one could come by and see.**_

_**What possessed him to wrap his hands around the orange haired youths' throat and squeeze the too-smooth to be considered normal flesh-**_

_**He was hissing in his rivals ear now**_

'_**What the hell did you do to me?' **_

_**Despite having a difficult time forming a sentence what with being strangled and all Kurosaki managed to rasp out a confused **_

"_**What are you talking about?"**_

_**Those eyes. Those fucking eyes were boring into him again-too wide…too innocent…too**_

"_**STOP IT!"**_

_**Grimmjow was roaring now, he didn't even recognize the sound of his own voice and from the slight wince it didn't seem like his rival recognized it either.**_

_**Narrowing his electric blues to the thinnest of slits Grimmjow increased the pressure on the other boys neck-wondering just how far he could go before Kurosaki delivered a counter blow or someone came along to pull him off the other boy.**_

_**He could feel the smaller body squirming against his hold now-feel the smaller veins pumping-the muscles twitching and straining-could hear the boys breath becoming harsh-labored.**_

_**Rather than finding some sort of pleasure at the sight Grimmjow felt his lunch threaten to come back up-the voice of reason did exist-he did, contrary to popular belief, have a conscious and it was telling him to let go-to fucking back the hell away before he did something he'd surely regret.**_

_**So he let go after a few moments but he couldn't just leave it like that-he had to make his rival see that he couldn't just wheedle his way into his mind-fuck with his head like that and get off scot free-if he did that Kurosaki would never learn anything.**_

_**Grimmjow curled his hand into a fist and slammed it into the other boys' stomach sending his rival crashing to the floor.**_

_**And then he ran…ran like a fucking coward once again.**_

_**()()**_

_**Grimmjow snorted humorlessly in his sleep and flipped over to the other side…**_

_**()()**_

_**As if Grimmjow's life couldn't get any more fucking complicated now he had to meet up with Kuchiki and go over lines in the play with her. **_

_**What a fucking joke!**_

_**He was strolling out of the home economics (another genius suggestion/demand from Yama-ji) with the raven-haired girl close on his heels, only listening with half an ear as she babbled about plans for Saturday afternoon…**_

"_**You can come over to the mansion anytime between 11 and 4 in the afternoon but you have to remember to mind your manners."**_

_**Grimmjow snorted, "Don't hold your breath Kuchiki I'll get there when I get there if I even bother showing up that is."**_

"_**Hmph I had a feeling you would try and pull something like this which is why I've also invited a few friends over so that way you won't just be stuck with me."**_

"_**Am I supposed to be impressed? You and your "friends" live so far up each others asses I wouldn't be surprised if you knew the exact color of each others' feces."**_

_**Kuchiki scrunched up her nose in distaste "That is disgustingly foul even coming from someone like you."**_

_**Grimmjow stopped in his tracks and turned to sneer "Someone like me? You don't even know me."**_

_**The girl crossed her arms and glared up at him "And whose fault is that hmm? We tried to be friendly with you-tried to welcome you to both our town and our school but all you can do is start fights and act like a raging lunatic."**_

_**Grimmjow started walking again, quickened his pace in the hopes of getting away from the annoying raven bitch. **_

_**Who the hell did she think she was anyway? She didn't fucking know him and there was not a fucking chance in hell that he had any interest in getting to know her.**_

"_**HEY! I wasn't finished talking to you. HEY!" She quickly caught up to him and grabbed a hold of his arm.**_

_**Bad move. Very bad move. For her.**_

_**Grimmjow didn't like it when any one touched his leather jacket! (never mind that he had 5 more like it at home) **_

"_**DON'T **__**EVER**__** FUCKING TOUCH ME!"**_

_**Electric blues bleeding red…**_

_**He back handed Kuchiki across the face not really realizing what he had done until he saw the red mark and heard the sound of hurried foot steps.**_

_**Grimmjow let out a curse. Okay so he was pissed and overreacted. **_

_**What the hell was wrong with him? He knew better than to lay his hands on a girl. Damn it!**_

"_**Oi Kuchiki g-**_

"_**Rukia/Kuchiki-san!"**_

_**Shit too late now.**_

_**Grimmjow ran his fingers through his hair and counted how much time he'd have before Kuchiki's support group came along to kick his ass.**_

_**On the plus side all the voices to reach his ears were completely feminine which meant Kurosaki, Abarai and Yasutora were probably still in class so he'd only have to deal with a bunch of chicks.**_

_**Correction angry chicks with soccer balls, baseball bats and kendo sticks.**_

_**()**_

_**The funny or not so funny part of this whole situation was Kuchiki didn't even seem mad and the raven haired girl had only agreed to the let big-breasted cheerleader escort her to nurses office after 15-20 of fussing over her supposed injuries.**_

_**Grimmjow quickly found himself in the kind of scenario that one would only expect to see in a tv show or movie created by women for women…the kind of scenario where women would show that they are in fact superior to men…the kind of scenario which displayed women at their finest, fastest, strongest...**_

_**FOR EVERY ACTION THERE IS A CONSEQUENCE**_

_**Arisawa Tatsuk,i Jackie Tristan and Honsho Chizuru were not the types of chicks guys like him should fuck with and Grimmjow had done a damn good job of steering clear of the trio up until now…**_

_**Standing there looking tall, dark and menacing…if Grimmjow were anyone but Grimmjow he would have flinched or ran or fought back but he wasn't an idiot.**_

_**Slapping Kuchiki upside her silly head was one thing-putting these three hyenas in a fucking coma…yeah no-not happening. **_

_**He wouldn't even bother trying to block the blows. He saw no point in doing so. It was karma…he brutally assaulted his rival just 48 hours ago and now he was going to get his ass handed to him by a bunch of chicks.**_

"_**Does it make you feel like a tough man hitting a defenseless girl?"**_

"_**Guys like you make me sick!"**_

"_**We're going to teach you a lesson you'll never forget."**_

_**()()**_

_**The girls had been kind enough to leave him in the bathroom rather than the hallway where everyone could point and stare.**_

_**They had left him chained to the sink in nothing else but his striped boxers with a black eye, split lip and bruised ribs but at least they been generous enough to leave the lights on.**_

_**Grimmjow wasn't sure how much time had passed until the bathroom door opened and his "rescuer" appeared**_

_**He took note of the shoes and knew who it was even before his savior let out a whistle **_

"_**Boy, those girls sure did quite a number on you."**_

_**Karma it seemed had a twisted sense of humor…**_

"_**Although you probably deserved it."**_

_**Grimmjow wasn't sure how to respond so he said nothing.**_

"_**Did you fall asleep in your own drool or did one of them actually go and piss on you?"**_

_**Grimmjow still didn't say anything. **_

_**He watched and waited-he wanted to see just how long Kurosaki planned to stick around and possibly maybe find out why his rival had come to "save" him in the first place.**_

_**Or hell how the other boy even knew where to find him.**_

"_**I don't know what happened nor do I really want to know but you can't stay on the floor and you really should put something on that bruise-it looks pretty nasty."**_

_**Grimmjow didn't know why he wasn't protesting as the orange haired boy unchained hands and lifted him to his feet-didn't know why he didn't mind his rival touching him-couldn't make much sense of anything-his brain felt sort of foggy in the moment.**_

_**He did notice Kurosaki's change in wardrobe though.**_

_**Like everything else the thin white cloth his rival was now wearing seemed to be shaped perfectly to fit his form. **_

_**Grimmjow kind of felt like a dumbass for not realizing it sooner-during their brawls he noticed that a lot of Kurosaki's fighting moves, stances, techniques were clearly practiced-ingrained-go figure he was a martial art student.**_

_**The bright orange locks were also slightly damp which led the blue haired boy to conclude that his rival had either got caught in the rain or just finished showering.**_

"_**Hey! Say something you're kinda starting to freak me out a bit."**_

_**FUCK! What the hell was he doing? It was one thing to get lost in his thoughts it was quite another to make it so painfully obvious that even the person who was dominating his thoughts noticed.**_

_**Okay he could do this. Play it cool. Growl out a half ass thank you and apology and then walk out the door and don't even think of looking back. **_

_**Yeah that should be easy breezy.**_

_**Roll your neck to get rid of some of the stiff ness and get the cocky sure fire grin in place and…**_

"_**Don't worry strawberry princess its gonna take a lot more than a couple of crazed hyena bitches to break me."**_

_**Kurosaki's orange brows furrowed "Uh you sure?"**_

_**He couldn't do this. He didn't want to do this. "I'm fine listen Kurosaki I don't know why you came to help me out but thanks I guess," **_

"_**No problem."**_

"_**Are you some kind of idiot Kurosaki? Or did you damage a few brain cells when I hit you the other day?"**_

_**Kurosaki was glaring at him now. Good it was better this way. **_

_**Grimmjow could handle hatred and annoyance over whatever the hell act of friendship the orange haired boy had been attempting to offer him.**_

"_**Asshole."**_

_**A grin. "Won't argue with you there." And then he pushed past his rival and pulled the door open pausing just to see if the other boy had anything else to add.**_

_**Sure enough less than a split second later**_

"_**You sure you're okay?"**_

_**A snort "You wanna come over and play my nurse and see for yourself, Kurosaki?"**_

_**Wait! What? He didn't really just openly suggest that did he?**_

"_**No but I will see you on Saturday at Rukia's."**_

_**Back the fuck up! Come again? Was it possible that his rival was openly flirting back?**_

_**Grimmjow dared to look back and instantly regretted it when he saw the genuine smile on his rivals face.**_

"_**You really should go and get your head examined Kurosaki."**_

_**The boy flushed pink and then scowled "Yeah well you should go put bathe your self in a tub of ice because you're gonna be sore in a couple of hours."**_

_**Electric blues flashed, "You're an odd one, strawberry princess."**_

_**Kurosaki snorted, "You're one to talk, Grimmjow."**_

_**What was this? Was this some weird backwards form of bonding or the beginning of something more?**_

_**Whatever it was Grimmjow did not want to stick around and find out.**_

"_**See ya round."**_

"_**Ah."**_

_**()()**_

Grimmjow woke up and reached for the tv remote and turned it off. He sat up no longer feeling tiered and instead went over by the window and looked out into the night…the sun would be up in a few hours and it would be Wednesday which meant he would be one step closer to being reunited with his rival…one step closer to doing what he should have done a long time ago…

TBC

Next time we return to Ichigo's view point!__


	9. Chapter FIVE C

Disclaimer: So they are actually trying to get rights to do a live action bleach movie…oh my god the horror I hope Kubo-sensei and anyone else who is responsible for the productions of all things BLEACH does not agree!

For Ane-chan: who could think of a better way to say goodbye to July?

Thank you to all readers/reviewers/supporters! We're back to Ichigo's view point as promised!

Drunken Seahorse

Chapter

5 sideC

After the night Ichigo had he considered it to be a complete and total blessing and couldn't wait to let his face finally hit the pillow.

He always found comfort in his own bed and at the moment there wasn't any other place he'd rather be.

But first getting clean was in order!

Shiro and Ulquiorra had headed to home to sleep as well…or so his powdered cousin had claimed anyway.

Ichigo could never be sure though especially since the couple seemed to have endless amounts of energy.

For all he knew Shiro and Ulquiorra only went home in order to change clothes and planned to head right back out the door in order to go to the beach or something.

Shiro did have a certain fondness for surfing and today was supposed to be one of the hottest days out of the year so chances were high that the golden eyed albino would be heading there.

As for Ulquiorra, the dark haired male wasn't a major fan of water-had a bit of a phobia-so he would probably spend the day on the shore.

Of course these were merely assumptions for all the orange haired male knew Shiro and Ulquiorra could really be heading back home in order to sleep or make that Ulquiorra would wish to sleep but Shiro would have other ideas.

Ichigo shook his head. Why was he thinking about this? He did not care.

Stripping out of the shorts and tank Ulquiorra had (some what reluctantly) let him borrow Ichigo made his way into the bathroom and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and scowled at his reflection.

No matter how much he exercised-no matter how much he worked out (much to his disgust/annoyance) Ichigo hated how his body always appeared to look and feel a little softer than the average male.

Sometimes in the deepest recesses of his mind he wished he had been born a chick because then he wouldn't have to feel like damn freak for having slightly curved hips and perky man-boobs!

The one person Ichigo had ever confessed his insecurities to had said it was all in his head-that he looked plenty manly to her and that he should stop acting like such an idiot.

Of course she had-that's what a woman of her profession had been paid to say-not that he held any bitterness towards his therapist but instead of lying to him why couldn't Unohana just have been brutally honest with him?

Raking a hand through his unruly orange locks and scowling even more at noticeable feeling of dust and dirt (compliments of the stupid jail cell) on his skin, Ichigo pulled back the shower curtain and stepped inside.

()()

After selecting a clean t-shirt and a fresh pair of boxers Ichigo climbed into bed and pulled the covers up to his shoulders. He was grateful for the navy blue blinds and curtains keeping the sun out as he turned on his side, shut his eyes and fell asleep.

And for the first time in the past few days the orange haired male did not dream or if he did he didn't recall what said dream was about.

It was 11:00am when Ichigo heard a tap, tap, tapping sound on his bedroom window. He let out a groan but made no move to leave the bed just yet.

A few moments later the tapping sound grew louder and more rapid. Ichigo scowled, threw off his blanket and stumbled towards the window.

Of all the people he would have expected to find…

"Morning Kurosaki-kun!"

"Morning Inoue. Rukia what do you think you're doing?" Ichigo asked half alarmed when he noticed the raven attempting to scale the brick house with the aide of the broken ladder that goat face insisted he had thrown out but clearly hadn't.

"What's it look like?" The raven-haired woman replied with a grin, "Climbing into your bedroom window of course!"

"Rukia I have a front door why can't you knock and enter like a normal person?"

Silver-blues sparkled "Because this way is a lot more fun now back up Ichigo I don't want to accidentally hit you in the face when I jump."

"Don't be stupid you try a stunt like that and you really will hurt yourself," the orange haired male leaned the upper half of his body out of the window and encouraged the foolish raven to "Grab my hand!"

Rukia shook her head. "That's not necessary Ichigo because I can make it on my own."

"Your funeral." Ichigo snorted in order to mask the uneasiness he felt as reluctantly dropped his hand back down to his side.

Rukia stuck her tongue out at him childishly and then called down to Inoue who was standing below, the buxom brunette was biting her bottom lip-clearly worried for her girlfriend but of course Rukia didn't seem to care in the least as she called out "Hime you still have that rope I told you to pack?"

"Got it right here Ruki-bunny!"

"Good. Tie a knot and throw one end to Ichigo."

"What? No! Allowing you to attempt a stupid stunt is one thing but you can't go and endanger Inoue like that."

"I can do whatever I want to Ichigo now grab the rope!"

Ichigo rolled his eyes but once again complied...then without intending on it he found himself falling into the past once again…

()()

FLASHBACK

_**Truthfully Ichigo felt like he was a little too old for field trips but apparently Kanonji-sensei decided that he and his classmates would get a better understanding of history if they experienced it live!**_

"_**Times have changed a lot. Back when I was a lad fieldtrips consisted of walking down to the lake and counting the ripples in the water or going out into countryside and searching for crop circles but here now in the present we have technology. Simply put on a pair of goggles or sit inside a machine and voila you're in Mountains or on the high seas."**_

"_**Kanonji-sensei with all due respect are you going somewhere with this?"**_

"_**My dear boy of course I am going somewhere with this," the man stood up on his desk and posed dramatically-pointing up towards the ceiling "We are all going some where-to the museum of all things grand, historic and unforgettable."**_

_**Chattering and whispers filled the classroom.**_

_**The man laughed "Ha, ha yes my children get excited because this will be the field trip of a life time."**_

_**()()**_

_That had been four days ago and now it was Tuesday but Ichigo wasn't happy in the least_

_(ENTER FLASHBACK WITH IN A FLASHBACK!)_

"_Grab my hand!"_

_Sure the request/demand seemed simple enough if it wasn't coming from his rival that is. Ichigo shook his head-he had a feeling that the moment he went to grab Grimmjows' hand rather than pulling him up the rest of the way the other teen would retract his hand at the last minute and Ichigo would be in for one nasty fall._

_Even thought he orange haired boy had dealt with broken bones plenty of times he promised his mother that he would start being a little less clueless and a lot more careful._

"_I can climb up on my own-you just look for a way out of here."_

"_Are you some kind of fuckin' dumbass Kurosaki?" a derisive snort, "Wait don't answer that since we both already know the answer," an eye roll "Stop being such a lil' bitch and grab my hand I promise I only scratched my balls twice today so you'll live."_

_Ichigo scowled. He really wished the other boy didn't have to be so incredibly crude and foul all the time-especially at a moment like this._

_Guffawing laughter filled his ears and his scowl depended before morphing into a full on glare when the noise grew even louder._

_On the plus side-yes because Ichigo could always find the plus side in everything-Grimmjow's laughter is exactly what he needed in order to climb over the fence-in a ass backwards way his rivals taunts helped._

"_Oh strawberry princess," a sing-song tone "If you don't like what I have to say why don't you hurry up and get over here and see if you can kick my ass?"  
_

_Cinnamon and coffee eyes blazed with determination. Ichigo looked behind him in order to see just how far he and the other boy had come in order to get to this point and then he returned his attention to the high fence and concluded that he was going to need a running start if he wanted to make such a high jump._

_It would be a lot easier if Ichigo hadn't worn his flip flops today-the teen inwardly snarled at his own stupidity and removed said flip flops, ignoring the cold feeling of the marble stone floor touching his bare feet. _

_Ignoring the possibility that the floor was covered in grime and dirt and possible fungus._

_Ichigo measured the height and the distance wondering if he might be able to toss his flip flops overhead first-then a moment later he shook his head-foot wear was the least of his problems._

_Even when he finally managed to climb over and join his rival on the other side they still had a whole new series of obstacles to consider-like security alarms for example._

_Chances were slim to none that a bunch of cops would buy a story about two school boys who got left behind and locked inside a museum during a class field trip even though that is exactly what happened…_

_Then again Ichigo should have expected this sort of thing since his day started off on a sour note_

_()()_

_**Kon had used up the last of the hot water and Ichigo was forced to take an ice cold shower and then when he went to pour himself a bowl of cereal a stupid IOU note had fallen out compliments of his moronic goat for a father and by the time Ichigo made it to school his friends and classmates were already boarding the bus for the field trip and he had no other choice but to sit with Kanoji-sensei.**_

_**The guy wasn't a bad teacher or anything but he was a little too bizarre for Ichigo's liking, always talking about spirits and the paranormal-claimed that a number of ghosts were hunting Karakura Town and that one of those ghosts was on the bus at this very moment-**_

_**Ichigo looked to his friends for help but Renji and Keigo were too busy talking about the new arcade that opened up next to the ancient theatre in Karakura Town, Inoue and Rukia were…well he wasn't really sure what the two girls were doing but judging by the amount of giggling and whispering coming from the duo every couple of minutes he guessed they were sharing secrets or talking about the hotties of the school or something equally girly and pointless.**_

_**Both Chado and Ishida were absent which was odd-especially Ishida since the guy had never missed a single day of school in all the years that Ichigo has known him. Tatsuki had sent him a text announcing that she had kidnapped Nel-chan for the day' what ever that meant-girls were seriously weird at times-he wasn't quite desperate enough to hang out with Kon and his manga-geeks so that left…**_

_**Cinnamon and coffee browns searched for a familiar head of blue-was he seriously considering getting up from his seat and striking up a conversation with his rival?**_

_**The very idea was ludicrous! What the hell could they even talk about? The weather? The amount of bruises they had acquired in the past few weeks? **_

_**Ichigo was beginning to get a headache just thinking about it. **_

_**FUCK IT!**_

_**He was just going to sit tight and shut his eyes. The bus ride couldn't be that much longer.**_

_**()()**_

_**It seemed like only a few minutes had passed. Ichigo could barely remember falling asleep but apparently he had because now Renji was shaking him wildly and bellowing "WAKE UP WE'RE HERE!"**_

_**When the orange haired boy didn't move fast enough his redheaded friend shook him and bellowed even louder (if such a thing was possible-perhaps, Ichigo reasoned, I just have oversensitive hearing) **_

"_**COME ON ICHIGO! KANOJI-SENSEI SAID WE COULDN'T GO ANY FURTHER INTO THE MUSEUM UNTIL EVERYONE WAS ACCOUNTED FOR."**_

_**Ichigo let out a lazy lawn and moved slowly-feeling rather sluggish for reasons he didn't really understand.**_

_**Renji was eying him strangely "What's up with you Ichigo?"**_

"_**What are you talking about idiot?"**_

_**The redhead scratched his head and shrugged, "You kind of looked like you were uh…never mind any way come on come on get up, move faster or I'll drag you off this bus myself!"**_

"_**Save heroic declarations for the stage, I'm not some stupid damsel in need of her very own Romeo."**_

_**Renji grinned "Nah but you could be if you let your hair grow out and-ouch hey what the hell Ichigo-**_

_**He had just smacked his friend upside the head "Shut the hell up and move your ass, monkey boy!"**_

_**()()**_

"_Your feet ain't gonna magically move on their own Kurosaki so stop spacin' out and get your ass moving!"_

_Grimmjow sounded irritated-not that that was anything new or unexpected._

_Ichigo snorted and decided he was going to take twice as long in preparing to jump just to piss his rival off even more._

_He studied the fence-it didn't look very safe or friendly at the top-on the contrary if he was careful he'd probably wind up cutting his hand up pretty badly from the uneven pieces of metal._

_()()_

_**Right so they were expected to line up in a single file and stay in groups or pairs rather than going off to explore or get in to trouble or both-Ichigo thought it was a little (more like extremely) ridiculous-what were they 10?...No they were 14 fucking years old as if they could really get lost!**_

_**Course Kanoji-sensei could be a reasonable guy from time to time**_

"_**Sensei I think it would be better if we just went on the tour together and then split up into separate groups and meet back up before the museum closes, that way we won't miss anything."**_

"_**A very good idea, girl," a waggling of brows "I knew there was a reason you sat in the front of my class."**_

_**The man was addressing Inoue but his eyes were on the cheerleaders chest rather than her face-Ichigo was tempted to call Kanoji out on his perversion but he didn't want to start any trouble-besides he reasoned-what kind of guy objects to a set of fine bazongas anyway?**_

_**Thanks to Inoue and her massive jugs this field trip might actually be some fun after all**_

_**()()**_

"_**So where should we go first?"**_

"_**We'll meet back up with you in a bit my lovely Hime-chan for now Jackie and I are gonna teach Asano here, that its not right to spy on girls in the locker room."**_

"_**But I told you that wasn't me!" Keigo wailed and waved his arms wildly.**_

_**It was at times such as these that Ichigo felt a little bit ashamed to call the other boy his friend-didn't like the idea of being associated with such a pervert and all-having a twin was bad enough.**_

_**There was a dark glint behind red frames "Sure you weren't," -Chizuru wasn't buying Keigo's act for a minute-clearly convinced that he was every bit the pervert that she accused him of being "The moment I turn my back you'll be looking underneath my skirt because you're a sick little doggy and that's what doggy's do."**_

"_**What?! I would never-Ichigo tell them I would ne-Ichigoooooo!"**_

_**The duo had grabbed a hold of both of Keigo's arms and started dragging him-daring Ichigo could jump to the brunet's defense-Ichigo was many things but suicidal wasn't one them.**_

_**He had no desire to be in Keigo's shoes right now but he had to do something to put his friend at ease-Keigo was unnaturally pale and that just didn't sit well with him.**_

_**He addressed the two girls "Can I just say something to him real fast before you take him away?"**_

_**With a bit of reluctance and a not so friendly smile the girls agreed.**_

_**Ichigo took the moment to pull his friend to the side and…**_

_**The next lines that came out of his mouth was arguably the biggest steaming pile of bullshit he had ever spewed **_

"_**You should consider this your lucky day-you're looking at this all wrong and by doing so you're missing the bigger picture-**_

"_**What bigger picture? They want to skin me alive and throw me to the lions den-well assuming there are lions-probably just really large dogs that look like lions-nasty vicious salivating-**_

"_**Keigo!"**_

_**A flinch "Why meeeee why does this always-Ichigo please come with me or hide me or something please I'll-**_

_**Ichigo shook his head ignoring the headache that was beginning to surface. He put a hand on his friends' shoulder "The girls say they want to teach you a lesson for spying on them but that's a lie-**_

"_**A lie?"**_

"_**Yeah they're too embarrassed to say they just want to spend some time with you-**_

_**Keigo looked doubtful and so Ichigo continued on**_

"_**No really-let's look at the bright side-you have not one but two girls who want you all to themselves-once word gets out and you know how quickly gossip travels every girl in town will want to date you-**_

_**Keigo looked thoughtful and then his eyes went bright at the possibility that the orange haired teen's words might be true "You really think so?"**_

"_**I know so-look at the way Jackie is tapping the heel of her boot right now? She only does that when she's excited."**_

"_**Excited?"**_

"_**You know…excited!"**_

"_**Oh? Oh! Really you really think she-and they and I-and seriously?"**_

"_**Shhh you don't want to let on that you know because then they'll back out and you'll-**_

"_**Okay, Okay I get it so what you're saying is if I let on that I know that they want me they won't want me anymore because then the game will be over and they hate losing and-**_

"_**Exactly."**_

_**Why the hell was he going through such ridiculous lengths to put his friend at ease-where the hell was this drivel coming from? It sounded like something out of a teen drama or worse… (brown eyes flicked towards the blue haired teen who was amicably chatting with his friends) something that his rival would say…**_

_**Ichigo shook his head. **__Whatever. He has nothing do with this. Not everything I do and say is related to that bastard. _

_**The sound of heels walking towards them snapped Ichigo his senses. **_

"_**We've given you enough time to breathe easily but you can not avoid your punishment any longer, now come!"**_

"_**That is right, Ichigo can protect you no longer-your ours now Asano."**_

_**Even though it shouldn't have been it was amusing and Ichigo could not stop himself from laughing.**_

_**And he wasn't the only one.**_

_()()_

_**Wolf whistles**_

"_**Asano you are one lucky bastard-if you get bored I'll come in and finish up for ya."**_

_**Rukia elbowed Renji in the stomach- "Don't encourage him, you idiot!"**_

_**The tattooed youth pouted and grumbled under his breath.**_

_**Rukia rolled her silver blues while Ichigo tried to figure out what to do next-he was getting quite tiered of standing around.**_

"_**Anyway have fun Asano-kun, we'll see you at lunch!"**_

"_**No you can't do this to me HELLLLLLLLLLP!"**_

_**Ichigo shook his head. Perhaps he should speak to Hachi-sensei about Keigo trying out for the role of King the brunet had the dramatic act perfected to the T.**_

_()()_

"_**So I hope everyone is hungry I have plenty of food and-**_

_**Scraping of a chair followed by**_

"_**Fuck this togetherness bullshit-I'm outta here!"**_

_**Was it really necessary for Grimmjow to constantly act like such a dick? Inoue had been kind enough to offer lunch to both the blue-haired boy and his friends and instead of graciously accepting it he just had to ruin what could have been a nice lunch with his 'anti-social I'm a badass I don't need nothin' or nobody bullshit?'**_

_**And then storm off around the corner and leave Ichigo feeling like-well…like it was some how his fault-he hadn't mean to sit down in the seat across from his rival he just pulled out a chair and…fucking ridiculous all of it-it wasn't like he was a walking disease or something-could his rival really not stomach the idea of looking at him while they dined in the museum cafeteria?**_

_**Was the other boy still bitter about last weekend?**_

_**Or was it something else?**_

_**Why did Ichigo care?**_

_**Why should he care?**_

_**Grimmjow was just…Grimmjow.**_

"_**You should go after him instead of sitting there pining away like a school girl and pouting like a child."**_

_**It was said in a whisper-and rather than coming from Szayel (the guy was often nosy and said things that well… left him feeling either exposed) it came from Illfort who rarely said much to him…Ichigo felt his face grow hot and he balled his fists-not liking in the least to being compared to a child or a girl!**_

"_**I'm not pining."**_

"_**Hmm and my brother doesn't tweeze his brows daily."**_

_**The hell?**_

"_**Ichigo what's wrong? You not feelin' well?"**_

"_**Kurosaki-kun do you not like your food?"**_

_**Gun-metal grays went watery-Ichigo felt like he had been kicked in the stomach-he hated making Inoue feel like she had done something wrong-he grabbed a meat bun and shoved half of it in his mouth-not bothering to chew it and nearly choking in the process-**_

"_The kitten is gonna need some training."__** He thought he heard Illfort say but told him self he was just imagining things or something-**_

_**He reached for a juice carton and didn't even bother with a straw just downed the contents-**_

_**For reasons he was sure he'd rather not know Rukia was smirking at him now-**_

_**Renji was looking at him strangely, Inoue's expression was difficult to pinpoint-it was across between alarmed and pleased? The Grantz brothers were whispering amongst themselves now but he'd bet anything that he was the prime subject of their conversation.**_

_**Ichigo wasn't in the mood for this-taking the carton with him he got up from the table and went off in the direction he'd seen his rival go just a few minutes prior.**_

_()()_

_**He wasn't really following Grimmjow. He just happened to going down the exact same corridors…stairs…and okay fuck it so he was following Grimmjow at a leisurely pace until the other boy sped up that is…then Ichigo had to start a light jog…the light jogging quickly morphed into a blazing run when the blue-haired teen caught on to what he was doing…**_

_**It was almost fun in away, the playful part of Ichigo's mind supplied…it was almost like a reverse of that American cartoon with the cat and the mouse…he being the mouse and his rival being the cat…only he wasn't squeaky and annoying and…okay that was a really lame comparison…just because his rival sort of moved like a feline did not mean…**_

_**A rush of air.**_

_**The hell?**_

_**A flash of blue.**_

_**How did?**_

_**Ichigo blinked…**_

_**When did?**_

_**How did?**_

"_**Looking for me?"**_

_**Ichigo shouldn't have been surprised/impressed but he was. No matter how many times he'd seen his rival do this sort of thing (Grimmjow would climb on top of high ledges or places that seemed damn near impossible for the average human to reach, with his body sprawled out just like a jungle cat, half of his limbs curled around whatever surface he was perched on while the other half dangled over the side.**_

_**The blue-haired teen didn't seem the least bit concerned with the possibility that if he made one wrong move he could fall-he merely grinned at Ichigo much like the Cheshire cat grinned at the silly little blonde in Wonderland. **_

_**If Ichigo had been a cruel and evil person it would have been all to easy to send the cocky ass flying over the balcony-barely blinking as blood splattered when the his rivals' body hit the bottom.**_

_**But that wasn't the kind of guy Ichigo was and if something happened to Grimmjow and he was the cause of it the orange haired boy wouldn't be able to live with himself.**_

_**He imagined that when he met up with his rival again it would be in fiery pits of a place that was anything but paradise-being reborn as demons-demons who were constantly at each others' throats-their dislike for each other would manifest into immense hatred and-**_

_**Ichigo shook his head once again questioning his sanity because really what normally sane person dreamt up such scenarios.**_

"_**How did you?"**_

"_**It's pretty easy when you've constantly got your head in the clouds, strawberry princess."**_

_**Ichigo glared at the half Canadian. **_

_**Grimmjow as always wasn't fazed in the least.**_

"_**So anyway you're here, I'm here might as well make the most of this moment and go do some exploring."**_

_**With these words the boy jumped down.**_

"_**What do you mean exploring?"**_

_**Rather than giving Ichigo the answer he wanted Grimmjow fished inside his pocket for something (the orange haired teen was betting it was cigarettes since it was rarely that his rival went with out one) **_

"_**You can find a lot of cool things like fossils, rocks or this!"**_

_**A purple spotted egg?**_

_**A purple spotted egg about the size of a golf ball-something told Ichigo that this wasn't a normal egg.**_

"_**Why are you showing me this?"**_

_**A shrug. Grimmjow tossed the egg up into the air and then responded by saying "Who else would I show it to?"**_

_**Orange brows furrowed "Uh-**_

"_**Don't think too hard strawberry princess-things aren't always as complex as you make them out to be." He tossed the egg up again.**_

"_**You probably should put that back where you found it, Grimmjow."**_

"_**Tch, why should I?"**_

_**Isn't it obvious?**_

"_**Because it doesn't belong to you."**_

_**A snort, "And?"**_

_**Were they really having this discussion?**_

"_**You can't just take things because you feel like Grimmjow."**_

"_**Preach it to the choir," a roll of eyes and then the other boy re-pocketed said egg. "Anyway if you're only here to lecture me you might as well save your breath and go on back to your little friends."**_

"_**This isn't a lecture I'm just tell-**_

"_**When are you going to get it through your head Kurosaki? I do what I want when I want-sides not like their notice or miss one fuckin' egg out of like 5500 or whatever."**_

_**Ichigo sighed. He really didn't want to have to fight his rival over something so lame so for the moment he ignored it and changed the subject "Do you really hate it here that much?"**_

_**A raised brow "You're gonna have to be a little more specific Kurosaki."**_

"_**I mean living here in Karakura Town. Do you really hate it here?"**_

_**The question seemed to catch the other boy a bit off guard but he quickly masked it over with a cocky grin followed by a leer (a feat which only a guy like Grimmjow could pull off in one go) "Is this really a round about way of asking me if I hate you Kurosaki?"**_

_**Ichigo knew his rival had blue eyes but he never realized just how blue they were-never realized that they were actually several shades of blue blended together rather than one shade like he had originally thought. **_

_**It was almost as though great ocean god and lightning god clashed and melded in order create such a wild unmatchable shade of blue.**_

_**He felt his face grow warm wondering why the hell such an image had sprung to mind-Grimmjow's sudden close proximity wasn't helping matters.**_

"_**You-**_

"_**I uh huh wait what?"**_

_**A chuckle "You asked me if I hate you but the real question here is do you hate me?"**_

"_**I-**_

_**Shit why did it suddenly feel unbelievably stuffy in this hall way? Why was he having a difficult time forming the proper words-how did his rival always manage to flip the switch just like that?**_

_**Ichigo wasn't even sure what the hell they were talking about any more.**_

"_**You piss me off but-**_

_**His mother had always taught him that hatred is the purest form of poison to the human soul **_

"_**I don't hate you."**_

_**Far from it. Not that Ichigo would admit it out loud but moments spent with his rival were…some of his favorites-something he looked forward to. His day didn't quite feel complete with out-**_

_He felt his face grow even hotter-__**what the hell is wrong with me?**_

"_**Hmm."**_

"_**What?" Ichigo snapped defensively-not liking the way Grimmjow was clearly mocking him now. Always such a jackass through and through, could never just let things-**_

"_**Stop looking at me like that!"**_

_**And there it comes again! The accusations. Ichigo had been keeping count-he counted 6 times in this month total that the other boy would suddenly snap and snarl at him for no real reason at all. He brought it up with his mother once during afternoon tea-not giving her any real details or anything-merely wished to shine a light of some sort on his rivals' strange behavior.**_

_**His mother had smiled at him in that understanding way of hers and simply told him to**_

_()()()_

"_You take any longer and I'm gonna grow a fuckin' beard."_

"_Shut up! Just shut up and let me do this my way!"_

"_Riiiight, yeah because your method is working out so well for you now-_

_Brown eyes blazed with fury "Grimmjow I'm warning you do not t-_

"_You can bitch and rant all ya wanna strawberry princess, not gonna change facts. I'm out here and you're in there."_

_Bastard was right. Ichigo was having more difficulty climbing the fence than he originally thought._

"_I could give you a few pointers but its gonna cost ya."_

"_No thank you!"_

"_Keh, suit yourself."_

_**()()**_

"_**I wonder what goes on in that head of yours."**_

"_**I could ask you the same question."**_

"_**Hmm."**_

"_**What hmm?"**_

"_**Nothing, nothing at all."**_

"_**Bullshit! You're using that tone-that tone that you always use right before you-**_

"_**Before I what, Kurosaki?"**_

_**Ichigo threw his hands up in frustration "That's another thing right there is it so fucking hard for you to call me by my damn name?"**_

_**A shrug "A name is a name, strawberry princess."**_

"_**No its not. You don't hear me bastardizing your name or giving you some sort of embarrassing pet name. I call you Grimmjow so why can't you just call me Ichigo?"**_

"_**You really wanna know?"**_

_**Actually Ichigo was dying to know the reason. Even in his dreams his rival insisted on addressing him by his surname-it was annoying and made him feel like-**_

_**He mentally slapped himself not wishing to complete the thought-**_

"_**Yes I really want to know."**_

"_**If I start calling you by your first name you might get the wrong idea and we can't have that."**_

"_**We? Who the hell is we Grimmjow?"**_

_**Maybe his rival had more than one personality or something? It wasn't entirely impossible or unheard of.**_

_**But his rival did not bother to explain further only switched the subject once more "I'll make you a deal Kurosaki, you ready?"**_

"_**What sort of deal?" Ichigo knew it would be foolish if he wasn't cautious about this.**_

"_**I'll put back the egg if you blow off the track meet on Saturday."**_

_**The hell? Grimmjow didn't really expect him to-**_

"_**What are you talking about? That egg and Saturday afternoon have nothing to do with each other. Stop being an ass and hand over the egg before you break it."**_

_**A shake of the head and then a mouthed 'No can do.'**_

"_**Why the hell not?"**_

"_**I'm not the kind of guy who does things for free Kurosaki," Grimmjow smirked when Ichigo let out a growl at the use of his surname again, "You want me to do something for you then you have to do something for me."**_

"_**No! I mean the coach and the guys count on me to be there and my fa-**_

"_**You can miss one day-its not gonna kill you or them. Hell I skip track at least 2, 3 times out of the week-won't be the end of the world if their golden runner doesn't show."**_

"_**Are you planning on taking my place?"**_

_**It wasn't a bad idea but Grimmjow didn't quite grasp the meaning of "TEAM"**_

_**A snort "Nah if I go then who will be there to greet you at the front steps of my house?"**_

_**WTF?**_

_**Grimmjow was fucking with him now. He had to be. There was no way the blue-haired teen was actually expecting him to-**_

"_**So whatya say Kurosaki?"**_

_**It was a trick or something. It had to be. Right?  
**_

_**But what if it wasn't? What then? What could he possibly do with his rival on a Saturday afternoon? **_

_**Wait! Why was he even considering such a-**_

_**Ichigo shook his head hard enough to where he heard a snap. **_

"_**Cut the crap Grimmjow! You may not give a damn about track but I do and more to the point-hey! Hey what are you do-?!"**_

_**Ichigo found himself in a similar position just a little over a week and a half ago-he glared half-heartedly at the taller boy "What is with you and pushing me up against walls anyway?"**_

_**Voice just above a whisper "I'm going to ask you nicely this time…blow off the track meet and spend Saturday with me."**_

_**Okay this was getting beyond fucking weird? And what the hell was it really necessary for Grimmjow to speak in that tone-it sounded like something out of-Ichigo shook his head-**_

"_**Get off me!"**_

_**A grin, "Technically I'm not on you," and yet with these words his rival stepped back a few steps. "So what now Kurosaki?"**_

"…"

_()()_

"_Hey princess, you fall asleep up there?"_

_Ichigo scowled "Shut up Grimmjow! We wouldn't even be in this situation if it wasn't for you."_

_**()()**_

"_**Fine you got nothin' to say. Then I'm outta here."**_

_**Before Ichigo could fully wrap his brain around everything that had just happened his rival was taking off yet again-making an unnecessary amount of noise as he did so-drawing the attention of several security guards.**_

"_**No running!"**_

_**A loud whistle**_

"_**Hey you! There is absolutely not running in a museum!"**_

_**The guards were fast but as always his rival was faster.**_

_()()()_

"_So I got another question for ya, ready?"_

_At this point what did it matter? "Fine go ahead and ask it."_

"_What was it like growing up-how many girlfriends (if any) have you had?"_

_None. But he wasn't about to tell his rival that._

"_Why do you care?"_

_A snort. "It's a secret then? Fine I'll ask another one: assuming you have any pubic hair down there does it match the color of your brows?"_

_The hell?_

"_What the hell is wrong with-_

"_Just answer the question."_

_But Ichigo didn't answer instead he fired his rival's question back at him "Do yours?"_

"_Mine?" A laugh "Nah my pubes are more of midnight blue rose color and during the spring time it sparkles."_

_It was official his rival was a freak!_

"_What the hell is wrong with-were you dropped on your head as a kid or something?_

"_Nope. I just don't see any point in censoring myself. We're both guys even if you scream like a bitch a times."_

"_Asshole."_

"_You make it all too easy Kurosaki, I mean would it kill you to lighten the fuck up and live a lil?"_

"_Living? You call living it up discussing the color of your pubes-what next are you going to suggest we have a penis war?"_

"_Heh, well now that you mention it…_

"_You're sick!"_

"_And you Japanese guys are way too damn sensitive. I mean do you even hear yourself speak sometimes."_

_WTF?_

"_Last time I checked you were Japanese yourself, Grimmjow."_

"_Half."_

"_Half. Whole. Two thirds it doesn't fucking matter no normal teenage guy is gonna sit around the camp fire talking about his fucking pubic hair and man parts."_

_Loud boisterous borderline insane laughter. _

"_Shut up it's not funny."_

"_Actually it is but anyway are you gonna climb or not?"_

…

_**The fence started to shake…no not the fence it was…**_

_**()()**_

"Earth to Ichigo!"

Ichigo felt like someone was shaking him. He furrowed his brows

"Kurosaki-kun you can let go of the rope now."

Rope? What rope? It only dawned on him a few minutes later… 

Oh yeah that's right Rukia and Inoue were attempting to climb through his bedroom window…no make that they had climbed through his bedroom window and now they were looking at him expectantly.

"Seriously let go of the rope Ichigo."

He stared down at his hands and dropped the rope. Then raked his hand through his unruly orange locks and asked the duo "So what are you doing here anyway?"

Rukia's silver blues glittered as she replied, "Interrupting your little trip down memory lane apparently."

TBC


	10. Chapter SIX A

**DISLCAIMER: AND THE UBER TALENTED MANGA ARTIST TURNED TO HIS PUBLISHER WITH TRIUMPHANT GRIN AND SAID….LET THERE BE AN ORANGE BERRY WITH UBER LUCIOUS ASSES…and KUROSAKI ICHIGO was BORN. I LOVE YOU KUBO-SENSEI!**

Everyone stand up and join sly in saying: Come back to the GRIMMICHI side Ane-chan!

FOR ALL READERS/REVIEWERS OF THIS STORY…THANK YOU! And remember There is no Jaques with out Jeager. GRINS

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, Language, Spelling, GRAMMAR, flashbacks, switching views, many a pairing but only one truly matters… Grimm and Ichi.

()()

Drunken Seahorse

Chapter SIXSIDEA

(Ichigo)

"So what are you doing here anyway?"

Rukia's silver blues glittered as she replied, "Interrupting your little trip down memory lane apparently."

"Ha ha no seriously what brings you here?"

"Well if you must know Hime-chan and I have some big news to announce."

The princess nodded "Mm hmm big news."

Ichigo raised a brow. Big news? That could mean anything. He hoped Rukia wasn't expecting him to play 20 questions or something.

A large glittery diamond was thrust towards his face a moment later practically blinding him. It took Ichigo a moment or two to put things together (what with his brain still slightly fogged up by thoughts in the past and all) "Married? You're getting married?"

"Mm hmm isn't it exciting?"

"Uh yeah I guess."

Rukia elbowed him in the ribs and hissed "Surely you can do better than that right Ichigo?"

Inoue was looking at him expectantly. Ichigo distanced himself from his violent raven-haired friend and plastered a smile on his face "Sure what I meant was its wonderful. You deserve to be happy."

Inoue let out a sigh "Oh Kurosaki-kun for as far back as I can remember I've always dreamt of this day-well actually the official proposal happened last night when I returned home from the donut shoppe….

My Ruki-bunny was sitting in our kitchen in the dark and when she didn't speak or even greet me naturally my mind jumped to the worst scenarios imaginable-someone had robbed our house or Byakuya-san had fallen ill or Miki-Mik-Ru-Sama had run away, she was breaking up with me or that we had lost electricity and she'd been possessed by a demon or alien and there was nothing left of her brain.

I dropped the donuts on the floor-deciding that I would mourn the loss of sugary goodness later and rushed over to my Ruki-bunny.

Shaking her wildly, my voice frantic and high-pitched I asked, "Rukia what's wrong? What happened?"

Inoue tended exaggerate when she told a story but Ichigo just nodded politely and waited for the buxom brunette to finish.

()()

Ichigo pulled on a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt while Rukia and Inoue fiddled around with his stereo before finally settling on a song…

_And it Goes Like This_

_Take Me By The Tongue_

_And I'll Know You_

_Kiss Me Till You're Drunk_

_And I'll Show You All_

_The Moves Like Jagger_

_I've Got The Moves Like Jagger_

_I've Got The Moves Like Jagger_

_I Don't Need To Try To Control You_

_Look Into My Eyes and I'll Own You_

_With The Moves Like Jagger_

_I've Got The Moves Like Jagger_

_I've Got The Moves Like Jagger_

"So why else did you come here?"

"We're here to pick you up of course!" the duo chirped in unison as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I don't understand. What do you mean you're here to pick me up? Where are we going?"

The raven and the buxom brunette shared another look and Ichigo thought twice about his question. Deciding he was better off not knowing.

"You know what forget I even asked. I don't want to know."

"Don't be stupid Ichigo of course you want to know-you NEED to know," Rukia pulled her bride-to-be in her lap and on to the bed before continuing "Today might very well be the day that you fall in love."

Orange brows furrowed. "Okay uh-"

And how exactly did his friends expect him to fall in love just like that?

"We don't expect instant results of course," Rukia snorted right before she boldly and shamelessly traveled to a place on her lovers' body that was better suited for her own bedroom not Ichigo's. "That would be too much to ask for seeing as you are so very picky about everything."

Inoue let out a shriek or maybe it was a giggle-either way Ichigo rather not know so he turned his head away from the duo and said, "That's not true I'm not picky about everything."

"There's nothing wrong with being anal about things Kurosaki-iii-kun (he did not want to know why the buxom brunette's voice sounded breathy all of a sudden-heaven only knows what Rukia was doing to the other woman) "It's just we're just happy and we want everyone else around us to be happy."

He could hear the rustling of sheets and slurping sounds and Ichigo decided that enough was enough "Look uh can we continue this conversation downstairs?"

It might be every normal guys fantasy to have two hot broads soaking they're king size beds with juices but it sure as HELL was not his!

()()

(Grimmjow)

"I'm not paying you to sit around and stay at home all day-either come in and do some work or I'll fire your ass!"

Grimmjow snorted into the phone before slamming it down. Hell if he gave two fucks about Baraggan's threats! He'd come back to work when he was damn well good and ready.

Downing the last of his red bull Grimmjow grabbed his stack of mail and walked out the door.

He always found that it was easiest to sort through his monthly bills while he was cruising the town with no real destination in mind.

()()

Just the wind in his hair and the thumping beats of the music beneath his feet.

Grimmjow only needed one hand to drive and even then he wasn't required to keep it on the wheel at all times. Reaching into his glove compartment for his last remaining pack of Cero 100's and a lighter-frowning when he came up short-there was barely enough fluid in the damn lighter to light one cigarette let alone an entire pack.

What the fuck?

Letting out a growl that was quite unnecessary Grimmjow turned up the volume on the stereo and ripped open his first bill at the red light.

Nope not a bill but the ever favored junk mail-gotta love it. NOT!

CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE JUST WON A TRIP TO ATLANTIS CITY-just simply follow the instructions and-

"NEXT!"

Cable bill/internet bill

Heh fucktards! He'd just sent a check in the mail wasn't his fault if the dumb asses lost it.

Just as he was about to open the next piece of mail the phone in his pocket vibrated. Grimmjow pulled over to the side of the road and opened his glove compartment once more-this time searching for his Bluetooth-hell if he was going to get another ticket for talking while he was supposed to be watching the road.

"Last name Jeager but the first sure as hell ain't Mick so who the hell is calling me and what do you want?"

_**"Ya're a regular bucket of sunshine aren't ya?**_

"Ahn who the hell is this?"

Snickers followed by _**"Ya don't know me but I know who ya are Grimm-know what ya want-who ya want and why ya want em' but ya see I'm not sure ya deserve what ya want**_."

"The fuck are you talking about-who the hell is this?"

More snickering _**"Prove ya can handle Ichi and I'll tell ya everythin' ya wanna know."**_

The voice sure as hell didn't sound like some snot nosed kid so that probably meant…

"Aren't you a little old for prank calls dumb ass?"

Mad cackles and then a dial tone.

"Lil bastard when I find out who you are I'm gonna kick your ass all over town."

There was a tapping sound on the window. Grimmjow cursed. The fuck-what now?

He hadn't heard any sirens so he doubted it was a cop. Most likely just a bum-like a window washer or something.

There were less of them in Karakura Town then there had been during his time spent in America but it was still annoying as all fuck.

He should ring the little pukes scrawny neck for smudging the windows. Rolling down said window Grimmjow narrowed his electric blues at said lil' puke and growled out "I'm not interested in your services so beat it before I break you!"

The guy turned pale or make that he turned even paler than he already was. Grimmjow grinned nastily loving how easily he intimidated others who pissed him off simply by existing.

"I am not offering you any services I was only hired to see to it that this was delivered to you. You are Jeager-san correct?"

"What do I need a damn envelope for? Who the hell are you?"

"Who I am does not matter. Please just take this and then follow the instructions on the back. Do not open it until you have reached your destination." A long chunky blond bang fell into baby blue eyes as the stranger bowed his head "I'll be going now."

Blue brows furrowed. Was Masaki behind this? The woman had said that he had to prove himself but Grimmjow thought that he and the woman had reached an understanding in the café that day. Or maybe it was Kurosaki's sisters?

()()

(Ichigo)

"Ichi-nii why didn't you tell us that Rukia-nee and Hime-san were coming over? I would have made more pancakes."

Ichigo let out a sigh and took a few sips from his coffee before saying "Its fine Yuzu. I'm not hungry so just give them mine."

The sandy blonde teen shook her head "Nonsense you need to eat-all of you need to eat." She stood up and tied her apron back around her waist smiling at all of them "I'll just make some more."

After a moment or two Karin took it upon herself to continue the conversation that Ichigo was doing his best to not take any part in-well other than what was necessary that is.

"When's the big date?"

Rukia and Inoue smiled at each other before answering, "We haven't decided on an official date yet. All we know is we want to get married in an ancient castle." Here the couple shared another look (as if was inside joke or something) before continuing with their grand vision or make that Inoue's grand vision since Rukia wasn't really a "castle" loving type...at least not as far as Ichigo knew.

"When I was a little girl I often dreamt of being a princess in a royal castle with many guards, unicorns and dragons. I just think it would be oh so perfect to get married on royal soil. Dine and dance in the grand ball rooms of the royal family," a dreamy sigh, "simply perfect."

Because Ichigo wasn't the type of guy to crush dreams he did not bother pointing out how ridiculous and unlikely his friends vision/dream of an ideal wedding sounded. Rather he offered the duo a genuine smile and a "congratulations."

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow stayed parked on the side of the road for a while before deciding to go to the location as instructed. It was a bit of a drive-almost on the other side of town but if Kurosaki's family was behind this then it was probably in his best interest to go. Heh maybe he'd even get to see the orange strawberry himself.

Anything was possible right?

Feeling a bit excited at these thoughts Grimmjow turned the key in the ignition and floored the gas pedal-maybe he'd get bonus points or something if he showed up before the scheduled 2' o clock time?

Glancing down at the envelope once more he considered going completely against what the blond had said and just find out what was written inside since it had never really been in his nature to follow rules/orders in the first place.

And only his rival had been bold enough to challenge him and call Grimmjow out on his faults…

()()

FLASHBACK

_"You're doing it all wrong! How is anyone going to know that this is a festival if the damn sign is hanging upside down?"_

_Grimmjow snorted at the sight of his rivals' puffed up cheeks and twitching veins-The harvest festival had actually been his idea-spare bout of insanity-wishing to make Yama-ji proud-try and get along with his classmates._

_()()_

_Pumpkins were the best way to ring in the autumn season, thought the blue-haired teen, so instead of following through with the classic haunted house and costume parties the half Canadian proposed a fair right smack dab in the middle of a gigantic pumpkin field-man made of course-since Karakura Town didn't really have pumpkin patches as Kurosaki had been "oh so kind" to point out._

_Their language instructor, Senor Dordoni or "Celery Tray" as Kurosaki preferred to call the man for reasons that Grimmjow did not understand nor even care enough to ask about, had misinterpreted their heated argument for a friendly debate and took it upon himself to pair both teens up and expect them to organize the Autumn Fair together-much to Grimmjow's irritation._

_In honor of the occasion the school had issued both of them matching orange long sleeve shirts with happy smiling pumpkins on the front-oh joy let's revisit our diaper days!-_

_Grimmjow of course had grabbed the nearest pair of shears available (how convenient that the tool would be right within in his reach) and cut the sleeves off of his own shirt._

_Kurosaki had raised a brow in question "Aren't you going to be cold?"_

_There was a couple of ways Grimmjow could have replied-the most favorable one being a sly quip or two but he was trying something new this month-keeping the peace with Kurosaki._

_"That's what the leather jacket is for, princess." With a grin Grimmjow slipped his arms into said leather jacket and zipped the front-not caring in the least that he was once again out of dress code._

_Kurosaki rolled his eyes and then a muttered "Whatever." And after this the two rivals fell into a companionable silence and set to work…or make that up until the point where Grimmjow grew bored._

_After all what the hell was the point in doing something with his rival if they had their backs turned to each other?_

_It was a nice day in October. They had an open field all to themselves-why let it go to waste? Why pass up a grand opportunity to-_

_"Hey Kurosaki!"_

_Shoulders tightening in irritation the orange haired teen paused in his action and looked over his shoulder and raised a brow that prompted the blue haired teen to continue._

_But Grimmjow didn't want to continue just yet so this time he called the other boy out in a sing-song type of voice "Ku-ro-sa-ki!"_

_A fierce glare and a noticeable twitching of veins in a peach toned neck that had no right looking so tempting "What Grimmjow?"_

_"Oh nothing," Grimmjow rested his rear on the blunt end of the shovel before adding "I was just thinkin' that this is such a big field and all-seems like a bit of a waste to pull weeds and trim vines when there's a wheel barrel and a mountain of leaves all around us."_

_Kurosaki set his shovel down, scowled, removed his gloves and stalked over to Grimmjow. "What the hell are you talking about? We don't have time to mess around when sunset is only an hour or two away and we've barely done anything," a curling of peach tinted lips "No thanks to you harassing the shit out of me."_

_Grimmjow decided he was going to ignore his rivals' bad attitude for the time being-fighting was not on the agenda today…at least not his._

_He grinned at the orange berry "Its only because you make it all too easy, princess."_

_Kurosaki let out a growl that only amused Grimmjow even more. "Come on where's your sense of adventure?"_

_A thin orange brow was raised so high it nearly disappeared into its owners' hairline. "Adventure? Exactly what the hell kind of adventure do you think we can have out in the middle of a giant pumpkin patch, Grimmjow?"_

_Grimmjow's grin widened "Get into the wheel barrel and I'll show you."_

_For a moment it looked like his rival might concede to his wishes-looked like Kurosaki was actually considering it._

_Grimmjow mentally patted himself on the back-loving that he could best the other boy with out beating him black and blue._

_"I don't know," there was hesitance in Kurosaki's voice but no flat out refusal "What if I break it or something?"_

_Grimmjow couldn't hold back a snort if he tried. Some times the strawberry princess was beyond ridiculous "You really think a light weight like you is gonna break it? Hell I could get in the barrel too and the damn thing still wouldn't break."_

_"Well if you're so gung ho then by all means go ahead and do it, Grimmjow."_

_"Hmm nope don't feel like it. Sides carriages are for pretty princesses like you not wild, badass knights like moi." Yes he sounded cocky and arrogant and hell even slightly gay but Grimmjow didn't care, Kurosaki was too naïve to catch on to his full meaning anyway. "Now be a good lil' princess and get in the barrel."_

_Orange brows furrowed together and his rival eyed him suspiciously "What's the catch?"_

_"No catch Kurosaki, just tryin' something different. Think its time you and me tried a new angle to this whole rivalry thing."_

_"New angle? Riiight you really expect me to believe you want to try and get along?"_

_It was annoying not that Grimmjow could blame him but really couldn't Kurosaki just believe him for just once in his life? He wasn't all bad- "I'm working on my exercises."_

_Why was he telling his rival something personal? Maybe because there was very little he could keep away from the orange berry._

_"Exercises?"_

_Well not literally more like steps that Ichimaru insisted/instructed Grimmjow try out during the path of learning how to control his anger-since the strawberry often riled him up like none other he was focusing on that first._

_Now if Kurosaki could just be a good boy and shut the hell up and stop looking at him as though he had grown a second head they could have some freaking fun._

_"Look do you have to make a big deal out of everything? Can't we just cut the bullshit and act like men for once?"_

_A genuine smile, "I'd like that."_

_Heh, that's more like it._

_"Good get in the barrel."_

_()()_

_And so it was on one afternoon during the second week of October two rivals let their guards down just a little bit and reawakened their inner child-taking turns pushing and riding around in the barrel and jumping through the mountain of leaves-being carefree, being stupid, being something a little more than…_

_"This changes nothing Kurosaki."_

_Soft snoring was the only response Grimmjow received from saying this. An electric blue brow twitched- "Oi Kurosaki what are you-?_

_More snoring and then…then…matching electric blue orbs grew comically wide as peach toned hands clutched a leather jacket-his rival had fallen asleep in his lap-in his lap while he was speaking while he was-_

_Grimmjow's face softened just a bit and he did not detach the hands from his beloved jacket-rather he let out a sigh and carefully-slowly reached up and ruffled spiky orange locks, which had no damn business being so bright and soft._

_"You slick lil bastard," a mutter, barely above a whisper "What are you doing to me?"_

_()()_

_A short while later when Grimmjow's number one rival reawakened with a small yawn._

_And then when Kurosaki realized what he was doing a light flush made its way on to his face and he looked away not sure what to say and quite obviously embarrassed._

_Electric blues rolled-typical._

_"Oi Kurosaki!"_

_The orange-haired youth turned to face the blue-haired youth but not right away-there was a moments hesitation._

_Grimmjow clucked his tongue and sneered-he wasn't really mad or irritated but…it was easier this way._

_"This," he gestured to the wide open overgrown pumpkin patch in the middle of the field "And us," he gestured to himself and his rival in turn "Never happened got it?"_

_There was a moment pause and a series of emotions crossed over the strawberry's face. "Ah, never happened."_

_Grimmjow ignored the slight nagging pain in his chest and reached in the pocket of his leather coat for his cigarette pack and lighter._

_Yes it was easier this way. So long as he kept telling himself this everything would be…_

_The sound of boots crunching against the leaves-his rival was leaving-heading home-not that Grimmjow cared-why should he?_

_"See you Monday, Grimmjow."_

_Grimmjow cracked a grin feeling all too pleased that the other had chosen to say goodbye._

_()()_

Surely anybody in his/her right mind would be a bit cautious before entering an abandoned wear house out in the middle of nowhere.

()()

TBC

**YES MORE FLASHBACKS…YES MORE SPLIT CHAPTERS…YES NO "REAL ACTION" NEVERTHELESS I HOPE YOU FOUND AT LEAST A LIL' BIT OF THIS ENJOYABLE. NEXT PART WILL BE UP VERY SOON…SEE YOU THEN**

~SLY~


	11. Chapter SIX B

**DISCLAIMER: But really I wonder what would have happened if Ichigo had smuggled the Panther King away from Hueco Mundo and into Karakura Town…sighs, if only you would just grant this fangirls wishes Kubo-sensei, SLY would be happy forever more**

()()

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

CHAPTER 6 SIDE B

(GRIMM CONT…)

Surely anybody in his/her right mind would be a bit cautious before entering an abandoned wear house out in the middle of nowhere.

Only a fool would waltz inside before checking his surroundings. Grimmjow wasn't a paranoid type of guy nor did he have an overly wild imagination but while his mother had been alive the woman had taught him many lessons.

The one coming to mind at this moment

()()

FLASH

_"You should never underestimate the power or intelligence of another country or nation. To do so could lead to one's downfall," words spoken right before the woman dunked the boys' head into a tub of bleach._

_Grimmjow's mother wouldn't tell him why it was necessary to bleach his hair ice blond but the boy had a couple of well educated guesses. He was betting the strange men in the next room were a large part of it. They're laid back poses and casual demeanors didn't fool the youth for a minute._

_These guys were…collectors or loan sharks of some sort-After his father had walked out on them his mother had gotten into some type of financial trouble and it was no longer safe for them to live in Canada._

()()

Grimmjow's lip curled in disgust 'Maybe if Yama-jii could get off his old decrepit ass for five minutes mama and I wouldn't have to leave home.'

Snorting at his altered appearance Grimmjow almost missed what his mother said to him next,

"It will only be for a short while. Half a year at best. You'll have to speak French a lot more than you are currently accustomed but eventually it will be like second nature to you."

The youth scowled and crossed his arms "I still don't like it mama. This stuff makes my head itch and you can barely even see my brows anymore."

The woman smiled down at the boy. "You'll get used to it."

()()

Why was he thinking of such a useless memory at a time like this? Hell if Grimmjow knew!

Removing his sunglasses Grimmjow stepped out the car and scanned the area before walking up to the abandoned were house. He couldn't tell much since the windows were heavily boarded up and the door was made out of solid wood.

But according to the envelope…

"Welcome to Shiro-bino's wonder shack-to learn more step inside!"

Grimmjow raised a brow. Not knowing whom this Shiro character was even though he had a slight nagging feeling in the back of his mind.

'I'm only doing this because he claims to know Kurosaki-no other reason.'

()()

(Ichigo)

When Inoue and Rukia wanted something there was no ifs, ands or buts about it the duo would get what they wanted because the two women became almost freakishly strong and there was nothing Ichigo could do to stop them.

Still he tried-first clinging on to the car door handle-digging his blunt fingernails into the leather-refusing to move an inch well…at least up until Rukia whacked his fingers with a ruler that she had pulled out of nowhere….

On Ichigo's second attempt to stay rooted to his spot…digging his fingers and feet into gravel on the ground out in the parking lot-not caring in the least about the fact that his underbelly was being scraped and bruised in the process as the princess and the bunny lover tried to drag him towards the overly bright, overly girly, overly puke-pink-tastic floral boutique.

Ichigo had nothing against flowers. No honestly he didn't but he did not wish to spend an entire an afternoon learning how to arrange bouquets or whatever his female companions expected from him.

Coming to terms with being a flaming poof was one thing. Gushing over flowers and oversized plants was something else entirely. Perhaps it wouldn't be so horrible if one of his fellow guy friends had tagged along to share in Ichigo's misery.

Chado was still in Mexico, Ishida was focused on becoming the greatest fashion designer Karakura Town had ever seen and refused to leave his apartment unless it was absolutely-then again even if Ishida did agree knowing Ichigo's horrid luck the guy would probably find an afternoon in a floral shoppe to be like a dream-Ishida always was a little weird.

Keigo was out of the question since he would be far more interested in flirting with the sales girls behind the counter rather than keeping Ichigo from being bored out of his mind.

And Renji….he and the tattooed redhead hadn't spoken to each other in years.

Hell the one time Ichigo tried to make amends-start a new by sending his friend (yes despite everything he considered Renji his friend) the finest cut of steak money could buy as a holiday gift he never even received a simple thank you note in return.

Of course Rukia claimed that she knew for a fact that the package had gotten eaten by a mountain lion or something…

'Hey it can happen you know? We've cut down so many trees and forests and built houses and condos right on their land so its only natural that the animals would move into our territory and eat the most delicious looking piece of meat in sight.'

The whole thing was doubtful-ridiculous and Ichigo vowed to never try and reach out to his friend again.

If Renji was gonna be a jerk and hold a grudge then why should he care? Then again forever was a long time.

"Hey uh Rukia?"

The raven-haired woman let go of his feet once they reached the entrance "Yes Ichigo?"

"Is Renji-uh did he get an invitation to my party?"

Rukia smirked "Naturally. He practically got down on his knees and begged for it-the poor fool."

Inoue nodded and then added "Renji-kun looked about ready to cry so I gave him my ticket since Ruki-bunny is my date and its seems silly to have to invitations when we're a couple. In addition to being official secret members of the P-league."

"P-league?"

"Mm hmm didn't anyone tell you?"

Ichigo shook his head and Inoue continued.

"Masaki-san set it up where a small group of us would keep an eye on you to ensure your safety and um-

"What?"

A sigh, "She's such a bright and wonderful person. I only wish my mother had been as dedicated when it came to my happiness."

Ichigo frowned. His mother meant the world to him but maybe he should talk to her about this P-league thing.

()()

(Grimmjow)

Sitting at a long marble table with a glass of golden liquid in hand sat a cross dress with long silver blond hair and golden eyes.

How did Grimmjow know that this was a cross dresser? The heavy eye make up, yellow bustier, silver sequined low cut-capris pants and zebra striped stilettos was a dead give a way.

The only question remaining-why was there a cross dresser sitting at a table when he was expecting some guy named now what was it Shino-Shippo-Shilo?

Black cherry painted lips curled into a smirk before the cross-dresser introduced him self as "I'm Shiro."

"Shiro?"

A simple nod "Yes I am Shiro and I know Ichi better than anyone else."

A raised brow "And? What's any of that go to do with me?"

A while blond brow twitched-seemed the powdered male wasn't a fan of his-not that Grimmjow cared.

"Everything."

"Okay."

"No not okay-a matching cherry black painted finger nail was thrust in his face "Nothing about this is okay Grimm-Jaque."

" you just ask me out here to lecture me all day or do you actually have something to say that could be of some use to me?"

The smirk turned into a wide grin "That all depends," Shiro crossed his legs and tapped his fingernails against his wine glass "Are ya ready to prove ya self?"

Grimmjow snorted "This some kind of trial-is that what you're tellin' me powder face?"

"He he, somethin' like that but we best keep it between jus' us two-don't think Oba and Oji would approve of my lil' test for ya."

"Test?"

"I'll make it crystal clear for ya Grimm. Ichi ain't a toy-ya want him? Think ya deserve him? Well then ya gotta go the distance and show it-startin' with this."

Grimmjow caught the bag that the bino tossed to him. There was nothing particularly special about the bag-not even a label on it just a simple plastic black bag.

The way Shiro's golden eyes were now glittering with insane glee made him rethink his previous thought.

"Open it."

()()

(Ichigo)

Ichigo would sooner gut himself before admitting that there was something very enchanting and inviting about this not-so-little floral shoppe.

It looked more like a botanic garden rather than a shop and he would only be lying if he said the flowers weren't having an effect on him.

The orange berry did not only wish to stop and smell the roses he wanted to buy them. As well as every other type of plant and flower he did and didn't recognize. It could be a gift-a surprise for his mother.

He stopped in front of a rather exotic looking flower resembling a birds' beak.

"Something caught your eye?"

Ichigo jumped feeling a bit startled at the new voice coming from behind. He turned around wondering where Rukia and Inoue had run off to now?

He looked up not sure what he was expecting but certainly not…

Based on the apron and the nametag it was an employee or one of the owners of the shop.

Ichigo wasn't one to stereotype but this guy well...in short he looked nothing like your average florist.

He was tall with bronze toned skin, two-toned dove white and slate gray hair and firebrick colored eyes. The scar shaped x on his forehead only added to the man's physical appeal rather than deter from it. He had a strong masculine nose, jaw and chin.

His body build was not quite like a tank for tanks were a bit more square and large around the middle.

Rather the guy had the kind of muscle mass that had clearly been achieved through hard labor rather than excessive work- outs at the gym. His eyes-sharp and narrow-pinned the orange berry to the spot.

Yet there was something about this guys' relaxed air that put Ichigo at ease...well sort of.

"Uh I'm here with my friends. They're getting married and uh-

Why did he always have to come off sounding like some pathetic submissive puppy in front of men like this guy?

It was annoying and embarrassing.

Ichigo inwardly snarled at him self and tried again "Anyway if I had it my way I wouldn't even be here because trust me this is the last thing I want to do on a Wednesday afternoon."

"How generous and loyal a person you must be."

Ichigo scowled. Was this guy mocking him or-?

'Is this what it feels like to be cornered by a wild rhino?'

()()

(Grimmjow)

Was this some kind of joke or did this powdered bastard who could almost pass as his long lost rival in a different universe actually stalk him for the past couple of years? Creepy much?

Grimmjow narrowed his electric blues at the bino "I don't know how the hell you found out about that but-

Shiro cut him off with a snicker "Calm ya self kit'n of course I know all about your lil' dirty secrets but that's not what's botherin' ya right now-nah you don't care about that-what ya do care about-or rather what's worryin' ya is the possibility that Ichi might find out since after all why would I keep such excitin' info from my favorite cousin?"

Cousin. Well that certainly explained some things.

Grimmjow was very tempted to reach across the table and strangle the life out of the powdered cross-dresser but he didn't think a certain strawberry princess would approve and so he kept his cool.

"I don't know how the hell you found out about my-about thisbut whatever you're driving at won't work because I'll rip out your throat before you can even get another syllable out!"

Shiro grinned entirely unaffected "Kit'n's got same claws eh?"

Electric blues flashed.

"Touche, touché. Tell ya what Grimm ya put on this sparkly little number and I'll take you too see Ichi tonight."

Grimmjow didn't trust just anyone but something told him he could trust Shiro. So with a scowl he snatched the dress "You got a bathroom round here or something?"

Shiro snickered "What's the matter? Ya shy?"

No he wasn't fucking shy. Lil bino bastard!

"Fine you wanna show? I'll give you one." Grimmjow unbuckled his belt and pulled down his pants.

The powdered berry clapped his hands and cooed "Lucky me, most girls only wish they could be havin' this much fun."

An eye roll. A grumble. Grimmjow pulled his shirt up and over his head than tossed it to the side. "You better not be fuckin' with me."

Golden eyes glittered and Shiro let out an appreciative shameless whistle "Wouldn't dream of it, Grimm."

Unbeknown to Grimmjow the powdered male had a few more tricks up his sleeve.

()()

(Ichigo)

Suka-darling you're not picking on our customers again, are you?" (1)

A second voice, masculine but slightly higher in pitch.

The second florist came skipping (not literally but pretty close to it) out of the swinging double doors located in the back of the shop carrying a bag of planting soil over his right shoulder.

He was also tall and his body build brought to mind the image of a military man for reasons Ichigo couldn't explain even if he tried-sometimes his brain/imagination just carried itself away-

The man's blond hair, sparkling blue eyes and scruffy chin hair did not mask his natural youthful looking appearance.

An unlit cigarette dangled from the side of his mouth and Ichigo was a bit impressed-must be some trick he thought, that the man was able to speak just as clearly as someone who didn't have a sin stick in his mouth.

Although Ichigo wasn't an expert on body language he had heard quite clearly-the blond had referred to the other as darling so there was high possibility that these two were a couple.

Then again perhaps the two men were just good friends who were comfortable enough in their own skin to fool around and tease one another. Although based on the way Scar's face softened at the arrival of the blond-it was probably the former rather than the later. Not that it was any of Ichigo business.

It was just well…interesting.

"Jean-pookie, didn't we agree that we wouldn't use pet names during working hours?"

Jean-pookie? What a strange-Ichigo shook his head. He's heard far worse.

"And for the record I wasn't picking on this boy I was merely making conversation."

Ichigo noted that although both of the florists spoke Japanese quite fluently there was a slight accent and that lead the berry to conclude that the two men weren't originally from Karakura Town.

Jean shifted his bag of soil to the other arm "Really?"

"Yes really now can you please stop lecturing me in front of the boy. It's embarrassing," Scar hissed.

The whole scene was beginning to make Ichigo feel uncomfortable.

He scanned the shoppe hoping to find Rukia or Inoue-no such luck.

He scratched the back of his head "Look its really no big deal I'm just here to support my friends-as I said they're getting married and well I'm not sure where they went but listen I don't want to cause any problems or anything. I just decided to look around and this uh flower caught my eye-I've never seen anything quite like it before and I- he trailed off-hating how unsure and unintelligent he must sound.

The blond man beamed down at him "Yes the crane flower is one of my favorites as well," a look of nostalgia crossed his face, "I remember the first time I first laid eyes on it I went breathless," a sigh and then blues eyes twinkled "You have a good taste for a youngster. What's your name?"

Ichigo was about to respond but a low growl coming from Scar cut him off-he wasn't an expert on these things but there was a good chance the man was jealous of all the attention the blond was giving him.

"I'm Ichigo and I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'm not actually buying anything today."

Jean frowned. "That's too bad but its not like we can force you to change your mind."

"No. Sorry."

"There's no need to apologize," here the blond flashed a radiant-almost breathtaking smile- "It's perfectly fine if you don't wish to buy anything."

Ichigo might be reading a bit too deeply into the unspoken words in the mans' sentence but he couldn't help but think this was some sort of reverse psychology method-the blond would some how trick him into buying flowers or a plant-convince him that it had been his intention the entire time.

'Why can't life just ever be simple?'

"If the prices are an issue then we will be more than happy to give you a discount."

Well on the plus side at least Scar was no longer glaring daggers -course that might be because Jean had wrapped his arms around the taller mans' neck-this couple was not afraid of showing public affection either apparently.

Ichigo commanded himself not to look away-he had to get over it sometime-especially if everyone around him insisted on being so touchy feely.

"What do you say, kid?"

Kid? Really was it necessary for these guys to constantly bring up his age-he wasn't THAT freakin' young. Its not like he was still in high school.

Ichigo scowled.

"Oh Steven now you've made Ichigo upset-making him ruin that lovely face of his-

Lovely? What the hell?

"Uh look I'm not-

"He doesn't like it he can leave." Scar or Steven or whatever his real name was grunted (2)

"Nonsense-now you stop that right now!" the blonds' tone was scolding even though his eyes were still dancing with light "This boy- (Ichigo's scowl deepened)- and Jean corrected himself "Pardon me what I meant was Ichigo is special. It is not every day we get such an adorable customer you know."

"Don't start this again-you talk about the kid like he's a new born pup or something-

Ichigo let out a groan.

'Seriously why me?'

()()

(Grimmjow)

Under the scrutinizing gaze of another cross-dresser Grimmjow could honestly say that this kind of thing happened-NEVER!

Shiro circled him like a predator would circle its prey-a wide grin stretched across the bino's painted lips-

"Hmm we're goin' to have to do something about ya arms," a pause, "A shawl won't cut it-instead ya will wear a jacket cuz afterall ya need to retain some of that bad-ass-ity ya got goin' for ya."

The powdered male put a finger to his lips again "We're gonna need to come up with a name for ya. Somethin' close to ya real one but not painfully obvious like Grimelda or somethin'-that's an ugly name anyway," a pause and then a snapping of fingers, "Ya name needs to scream I'm a sexy bitch and I get what I want when I want it!"

Grimmow's right brow twitched and he chewed on the inside of his cheek-not quite sure what Shiro was talking about although he had a guess or two.

"I'm gonna give ya a pair of sunglasses and an ear piece as well-that way I can determin' whether or not ya are serious bout ichi. Ya can't make it too obvious though-ya need to be discreet-keep ya self hidden in the shadows until I give ya the signal."

Back the hell up! Wait just a minute this was beginning to sound a lot like some cheesy spy stalker/blind date scenario and from the sound of things Shiro expected him to go out in public in a dress, wig and heels-seemed the golden eyed bino expected Grimmjow to approach his rival dressed like a chick-oh hell fuckin' no!

Shiro grinned "No one ever said this was gonna be easy Kit'n ya can back out if ya like but this opportunity won't come to ya again."

There had to be a way to get out of this and still see the orange berry-there just had to be-Grimmjow wracked his brain-trying to think of a way to get Shiro to change his mind.

()()()

(Ichigo)

"There you are Kurosaki-kun, we've been looking for you for almost an hour."

Ichigo turned to find both of his female companions standing inside the floral shoppe with flushed faces, smeared makeup, wrinkled blouses, grass-stained skirts (he raised a brow) and cherry chocolate covered ice cream cones in hand.

Bullshit they were looking for him. The duo had run off-probably to the park or something nearby and decided to act like horny teenagers-feasting on each others bodies as a main course and then knocking out the poor pathetic gullible bastard driving an ice cream truck and stealing all of his loot-the cops were probably looking for Rukia and Inoue at this very moment and-

"We haven't decided on a date but where's the fun in following the same old routine's anyway besides planning a the perfect honey moon is almost as important as planning the perfect wedding you know?"

"Yes and can you honestly think of a better place than a private beach resort?"

"Beach resort?"

Inoue's lashes shielded her gunmetal grays and a sad frown marred her otherwise pretty face "Oh I'm sorry Kurosaki-kun I'd almost forgotten about your beach phobia."

Rukia snorted and corrected the other woman before Ichigo could "It's not a phobia Hime, its more like," a smirk "Should I continue or would you like to tell the story?"

Ichigo scowled. Now? Really? In front of complete strangers and Inoue?

"Shut up Rukia."

"It's not his fault really," the raven-haired woman continued on completely ignoring his request/plea/demand "Ichigo used to love the beach up until the moment when he discovered that he was-

"SHUT UP RUKIA!"

Ichigo didn't mean to bellow and make a scene-he didn't mean to startle Inoue and make both Scar/Steven or Jean flinch but enough was a freaking nough! He was sick and tiered of having his personal life/be it past or current aired out.

Rukia looked like she wanted to continue taunting him but thankfully refrained-for once.

"I'm going for a walk. You and Inoue stay here and discuss your floral patterns or arrangements or whatever."

()()

FLASHBACK

_'I'm only going because Shiro's competing-no other reason. It's just a coincidence that Grimmjow happens to be throwing a beach party on the same day at the same time.'_

_Lovely speech Ichigo was telling himself as he checked out his reflection in the mirror for the 3rd time in the past 15 minutes. Board shorts and one of goat faces' floral printed shirts didn't scream "Look at me did it? Perhaps he shouldn't have bothered to put gel in his hair especially since it was bound to get wet at the beach anyway._

_Why had he purchased the damn gar of apple-scented goo in the first place? Because Rukia had insisted on it-just like his raven-haired friend also insisted that Ichigo should ditch his beloved blue jeans for one day._

_Ichigo wasn't really sure why he listened to almost everything Rukia said-maybe it was because a small part of him wished for the girls' approval._

_Lately the orange berry has been thinking if he could just shut off the wrong part-the freakish part of his brain for 5 minutes his normal side could retake control and he could appreciate the fairer sex._

_Appreciate how well the teeny black bikini made Rukia's silver blue eyes stand out even more-could appreciate her soft vanilla cream toned skin rather than day dream about his pain in the ass rival sun-tanning on the beach-just thinking about Grimmjows' perfect chiseled abs and biceps and-Ichigo punched the mirror refusing to complete his treacherous thought-ignore his reddened face._

_There was a knock on the door_

_"Do you need some help Ichigo? Inoue or I could come in there and-_

_"NO! NO I'm fine Rukia. I'll be down stairs in a few minutes. You should-why don't you head out to the car? Renji's probably going stir crazy by now you know he gets when he's left in a car for too long."_

_"Well alright if you're sure-_

_"I'm fine really," Ichigo insisted even though he was feeling anything but fine. "I'll be out in a minute."_

_'Right after I get rid of this' he mentally added as he glared down at the tent in his pants._

_()()_

_It wasn't too late to back out now. Fall and crack his head open on the porcelain sink-drown himself in the tub-pretend that he had suddenly come down with a severe case of the flu. Shiro would be pissed-would probably refuse to have anything to do with him but-_

_'My humiliation vs Shiros' wrath? I think I'll take my chances.'_

_()()_

_But of course his powdered cousin couldn't just bite his head off and ignore him for ever more-that wasn't Shiro's style. No instead at a quarter past 12:00pm the golden eyed bino pounded on Ichigo's bedroom door and_

_"King ya bring ya scrawny ass out here or I'll come in there and drag ya out screamin'-your choice."_

_On the plus side the powdered berry was nice enough to at least give Ichigo a few minutes to consider before making good on his threat and breaking down the door._

_Ichigo let out a groan. Doors weren't exactly the cheapest things to replace. He glared at his cousin "What the hell is the matter with you? Do you know how much that costs?"_

_Shiro stepped over the broken door and shrugged, "Eh if it means that much to ya Ichi I'l buy ya a new one. More import'antly stop avoidin' the reason for my comin' here-get ya ass outta bed, now!"_

_Shiro didn't make empty threats. Ichigo knew this better than anyone and yet it still didn't stop him from pulling both the bed sheets and pillow back over his head._

_"I'm not going anywhere."_

_Ichigo imagined his powdered cousin was pretty fucking pissed right now but he simply did not care. Shiro would have other competitions-what was the big deal if he missed out on one race?_

_"Alright King I'm gonna give ya to the count of three and if you're not outta bed by then well…._

_The sound of knuckles cracking reached the orange berrys' ears-_

_Ichigo let out a growl and threw off his covers, snarling out a series of curses at his cousin who was now wearing a triumphant grin on his face._

_"That's my Ichi-knew ya'd come round."_

_Ichigo flipped Shiro the bird and stormed into his private bathroom and slammed the door with more force than was necessary._

_()()_

_40 minutes later…BEACH BUMS AHOY!_

_On the plus side the beach wasn't overly crowded nor was the weather blazing hot. Shiro wasted no time in dropping Ichigo quite literally into the sand so he could run off and be his uber social self._

_It was the way the golden-eyed youth had always been for as far back as Ichigo could recall._

_Shiro would say and do just about anything and strike up a conversation of some sort with just about anyone whether it be a bum, druggies, gang members, old ladies, newborns, college girls (or the occasional college guy), street performers, nuns etc._

_A shadow fell over Ichigo pulling him from his thoughtful musing. He looked up and almost instantly regretted it._

_Life hated him. Seriously._

_Looking way hotter than any fantasy the orange berry could conjure up in his mind-the real thing-the real Grimmjow was rocking beach wear (a shark fang necklace, black wife beater, khaki colored board shorts, purple flip flops) far better than he had any right to-but hell if Ichigo would voice these thoughts out loud._

_Not that he had to since there was a good chance his rival already knew what with the huge grin he was wearing on his face and all._

_"Congratulations Kurosaki you've just been recruited to join my team."_

_Ichigo narrowed his eyes at his rival suspiciously and Grimmjow used the opportunity to invade his personal space and pull him to his feet. "Up you go!"_

_Perhaps the sun had gone to Grimmjows' brain because what other reason would there be for the guy to act so-_

_"Lose the shirt strawberry princess, its completely washes out the color in your face."_

_Call it amnesia. Call it too much exposure to the sun. Call it hypnotism. Call it whatever the fuck-Ichigo had no proper explanation for what he was doing-as if he was a puppet having its strings pulled by its master the orange berry worked nimble fingers on the buttons of his borrowed shirt-rolling it up into a ball and shoving it into the bottom of Inoue's over sized beach bag._

_Against his better judgment and common sense Ichigo followed his rival or more accurately he let Grimmjow drag him to the other side of the beach._

_In the back of his mind Ichigo knew something was off-this wasn't an every day occurrence-this-whatever this was-Grimmjow was up to something-a prank of some sort-_

_Ichigo paused in his steps and scanned the area._

_He wasn't exactly sure how it happened but almost every time he went out he would get separated from his friends-or make that Rukia, Renji and Inoue always tended to disappear on him before he could even register exactly what was going on._

_And his powdered cousin was of no help to him at all._

_Shiro was getting even more revved up for his race-waxing his beloved board and striking a pose for his fanclub-well in between playfully shoving his opponents in the water-that is._

_Ichigo let out a sigh. 'How do I always end up in situations like these?'_

_"You're too quiet back there. Say something."_

_And that was another thing. Why was he walking behind his rival instead of beside him like equals?_

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

_"Oi!"_

_His rival was barking commands but his voice lacked edge. Grimmjow sounded more amused than anything._

_"Oi Kurosaki you haven't seen me in 2 days the least you can do is acknowledge me when I'm speaking to you."_

_There were a couple of ways Ichigo could respond to this but-_

_"You're the last person I'd expect to be walking around in public wearing a pair of royal purple flip flops, Grimmjow."_

_There that was something-perhaps not what his rival was expecting but it was better than silence-better than stumbling over his words-better than throwing out insults-not that he wished to insult the taller youth in the first place._

_Ichigo wasn't really sure what he wanted. He was wary and curious at the same time._

_Grimmjow turned and his blue eyes glittered, "The fact that you've noticed tells me I made the right choice."_

_Ichigo's orange brows furrowed he was confused and-_

_"Wait? What?"_

_Grimmjow tossed his head back and laughed and Ichigo glared at him._

_"What the hell is so funny?"_

_Was he missing something? Just what the hell was going on? Why wasn't Grimmjow threatening to tear him an additional ass hole right now? Why wasn't his rival-?_

_The blue-haired teen shook his head, "Nothing Kurosaki. Nothing at all." And yet the laughing continued._

_Ichigo let out an angry growl "Bullshit! What the hell is so damn funny? Tell me!"_

_"It's not so much ha-ha funny it's more like erm how should I put this?_

_A pause_

_"You noticed what I was wearing ergo you were checking me out ergo-_

_A second pause_

_And then Grimmjow was invading Ichigo's personal space-practically nose to freaking nose-eyes oh so blue-teeth oh so freaking white-mouth oh so freaking-_

_"You. Want. Me. Don't. You?"_

_()()_

_It looked like a normal beach volley ball game and there were even a few girls in the group including-_

_"Itsugoooo!"_

_Nel and her mega-sized jugs-the over hyper half Russian girl was dressed in a turquoise green string bikini and a white mini-skirt-not exactly sport attire but Nel nor anyone else seemed to have any objections to her lacy black panties being flashed when a particularly harsh gust of wind blew in when she ran up to greet Ichigo._

_Getting suffocated by boobs was not part of Ichigo's agenda today so he carefully pried the girls' fingers off of him "Hi, Nel."_

_The girl began to talk at a mile a minute and Ichigo wished either Rukia or Inoue were around to translate-he knew Nel was just excited but-_

_The orange berry looked back at his rival and paled at the sight of Grimmjow's murderous glare._

_What the hell?_

_What the hell was the blue-haired bastard pissed about this time?_

_After a moment or two the answer clicked in Ichigo's brain._

_Of course! Grimmmjow probably had a crush on Nel-the guy was probably in the middle of courting the sea-green haired girl and this particular beach party was their first official date or something._

_'And I just fucked that all up with my appearance didn't I?'_

_Ichigo now felt annoyed-or make that more annoyed than he did before-he glared at Grimmjow-_

_'Bastard! Why the hell did you invite me (more like drag me) over here if you're on a date with Nel?'_

_An electric blue brow was raised and Grimmjow mouthed 'What are you glaring at princess?'_

_Ichigo angrily made wild hand gestures and then mouthed back 'You're the one who started it.'_

_And then Grimmjow was grinning at him before turning to address the group._

_"Alright enough chit-chat this isn't a jolly fuckin' tea party-get your asses over to the other side of the net and let's play some volley ball!"_

_It was kind of weird in a way seeing his rival interacting with others baring the Grantz twins who were oddly enough no where to be found._

_'Don't be stupid of course Grimmjow has other friends besides those two guys.'_

_Not that Ichigo didn't think it impossible but…well Grimmjow often went on and on about how he couldn't stand being around other people for longer than necessary and-_

_A tall, thin blonde bright eyed leech wearing a purple bikini and black aviators sidled up to Ichigo just then and attached herself to his arm as she breathed out in what apparently was supposed to be a seductive purr to make him weak in the knees-but failed tremendously_

_"Hi there."_

_An orange brow twitched-why oh why did girls have to constantly keep touching him-? Couldn't they see that he just wasn't interested in their over bleached roots, over plucked brows and over whitened teeth-not that there was anything wrong with these things but would it kill these girls to act a little more normal?_

_"I'm Ino and I've been meaning to ask you this for awhile now," pause and a batting of uber fake lashes "Are you seeing anyone?"_

_Ichigo opened his mouth ready to tell the girl that he was not interested when-a loud horn was blown right next to his ear practically deafening him_

_"Oi,oi,oi! We don't have time for introductions. Do that on your own damn time and get your asses over on the other side of the net._

_Ah good things do happen and the heavens did not entirely hate him after all. His rival-bless him-had come to his rescue-granted in an obnoxious way but…Ichigo was grateful all the same._

_"No not you. You stick with me princess."_

_Ichigo decided he would let it slide. But only for today. Tomorrow would be a different story._

_Volleyball wasn't exactly a favorite sport of his but he was curious/anxious to know what it would be like to be playing with his rival for once instead of against him._

_"Ah come on Grimm! That's not fair and you know it." A girl with lavender colored braids whined._

_Her bestfriend? Sister? Cousin? Bodyguard? Nodded in agreement and then added "Yeah you already have enough members on your team-Kuro-chan should be with us."_

_Ichigo didn't wish to be rude or judgmental but he wasn't so sure he'd be comfortable with the idea of teaming up with a girl who wore costume bull horns and pipe cleaners-freakin pipe cleaners!-in her hair._

_Another boy stepped up and placed his hand on the girls shoulder-giving a reassuring smile and nod, -as if to say 'I got this'_

_"Think about Grimm what are the chances of it being a fair game when you have all the best players?"_

_A deep growl "AH SHUT YOUR DAMN PIE HOLES ALL OF YOU! If you're gonna bitch about it then Kurosaki and I'll play by ourselves and you can just sit your asses on the side lines."_

_Ichigo thought this would be a good time to speak up "Uh I never actually said I w-_

_Electric blues narrowed as Grimmjow came very close to invading his space yet again "You'll play because I say you're gonna play," here a flash of a grin that was somewhere in between friendly and flirtatious "I'll consider it a birthday present since you showed up empty handed."_

_Ichigo blinked. It was his rivals' birthday how could he have not known this?_

_Whatever there was nothing he could do about it now. Next year he would get Grimmjow something-what that something was exactly well…he wasn't sure but it would come to him._

_"Fine but no cheating."_

_Laughter reached his ears "No need."_

_()()_

_And in the end despite the obvious/annoying fact that his rival did in fact cheat multiple times-kicking sand into another persons face and giving himself extra points just for being him was most definitely cheating-not that Ichigo took this lying down of course._

_He and his rival spent a good part of the game bickering and shouting and more or less ignoring the other players as they tried to best each other even though they were supposed to be teammates._

_Such was the way of their connection._

_But Ichigo wasn't going to lie to himself he enjoyed every part of it. He was having fun and didn't really want it to come to an end yet at the same time-_

_Something cold was pressed against Ichigo's cheek_

_"Drink up. Can't have you passing out from heatstroke when the funs just begun."_

_Drink up? Sure why not? And while Ichigo was at it he could share a beach towel and sit on the sand with Grimmjow-a few spare inches between them._

_Why not rest his head on top of the other teen too? They could gaze up at the sky and count the stars when the sun set. Ichigo could make a wish like some love sick school girl and then blame it on the alcohol when Grimmjow made a move and kissed him-and he kissed back._

_Sounded like a jolly plan IF he was living in a different universe in a different body-living a different life-where he was not himself but someone else._

_"No thanks I'll pass. I actually need to head back now."_

_Grimmjow frowned. It was a blink and you'll miss frown it but Ichigo didn't miss it because he was always watching Grimmjow._

_A careless shrug "Suit yourself."_

_He said his piece. Played the game. Now it was time to walk away but not with out-_

_Brown eyes scanned the area. It would be quick. It would be lightening quick-everyone's back was turned and the others were too heavily engaged in their own conversations to notice-he could do it now and no one would know-no one would judge-no one would-_

_Move a little closer. Up on his tip toes. Lean up and-_

_"Don't do something you might regret later, strawberry princess."_

_And just like that-with his lips just less than a hair's-breath away from Grimmjows'-perfect chiseled cheek bones-and that sharp angled jaw- Ichigo froze and pulled back._

_What the hell was he doing-if he went and kissed Grimmjow now-even if it was on the cheek and not the mouth it would only make things more complicated-more difficult more-_

_"I'm sorry." A whisper. Barely there and then he was running…running away from his rival…running away from what could have been but what he was too afraid to start._

_()()_

_Reaching the other side of the beach. Sanctuary. Freedom. He didn't go so far as to break down and cry-that would have been beyond pathetic-He punched the cool white sand as though it were the source of his problems-his confusion-his pain-his_

_"DAMN IT!"_

()()

"Or maybe it should be somewhere more traditional like an onsen or something?"

That's a great idea Hime. Byakuya-nii-sama has been trying to get me to go to one of those for years but I never went because well I thought it would be boring and I'd have no one to share the experience with."

Orange brows furrowed. Hotsprings? What did hotsprings have to do with-?

_'Oh crap I did it again didn't I?'_

But how did it happen. Last I remember I was walking away from them to clear my head and-

"Come on Ichigo we have other places we need to be and other people we need to see. Jean, Suka thank you for your time."

TBC

Suka/Scar/Steven….all the same guy…he's a character from the fullmetal alchemist series. I'm not like a major fanatic of the series so I'm not sure about the facts but I think Suka is the way his name is pronounced/written in the original version-Scar in the American version and as for Steven…well that was all Ane-chan's idea. I liked it and it stuck.

Anyway so it may not seem like it but this story is getting close and closer to the "big night"…just bare with sly a little longer and enjoy all of the elements…even if they seem a bit pointless at times.

THANK YOU FOR READING!

AND EXTRA THANKS TO THE REVIEWERS!


	12. Chapter SEVEN A

Disclaimer: Search high, search low but you will not find Ichigo….only the genius creator Kubo-sensei.

Authors note: Reasons for delayed update? Personal life BS, working and constructing a ByaIchi holiday fic.

Warnings: AU, OOC, many many many pairings, grammar, punctuation, errors, etc. ENJOY!

Drunken Seahorse

**CHAPTER SEVEN SIDE A**

(Ichigo)

Ichigo figured if he was going to be dragged all around town he might as well make the most of it…not that falling asleep in the backseat had been preplanned but…

_FLASHBACK_

_Somehow it was always a bad sign when his alarm clock didn't go off in the morning when it was scheduled to do so. Ichigo couldn't explain why he felt this way-just that he did._

_()()_

_When he arrived at school and discovered everyone (minus the slackers who sat in the back) crowded around Inoue's desk-the princess had tears streaming down her otherwise flawless face-a box of Kleenex half emptied-nose red and raw from blowing no doubt. Ichigo frowned wondering who or what had upset his friend._

_The orange berry didn't fancy being covered in snot (babysitting on weekends and wiping up drool and changing diapers was one thing) but sometimes sacrifices were necessary-an unspoken rule of friendship. _

"_Inoue what's wrong?"_

_It didn't come as a great shock when the girl did not answer him right away. How could she when she probably hadn't even heard Ichigo in the first place?_

_How could anyone hear anything when they were all talking over one another at once?_

_And so Ichigo repeated his question-louder this time. _

"_Inoue what's wrong? What happened? Why are you crying?"_

_The princess sniffled and turned to him with shiny eyes-her voice sounding slightly hoarse "Oh Kurosaki-kun!" she forced herself to smile and continued. "You'll have to forgive me for not giving you a proper good morning greeting but I'm just not myself right now," another sniffle "I-I feel like I've been violated."_

_A frown marred Ichigo's face and he knelt down and urged the girl to continue._

_After a moment or two she did…but when Inoue told a story she told it in such a way that was entirely unique to her nature._

"_**It started out like any other morning. I sat down under the cherry blossom promise tree with my messenger bag and little basket in hand. Selected one nutrigrain bar, 2 marshmallow and melon smoothies and one egg and raisin croissant and ate each one in turn being sure to chew carefully because you can die if you don't properly chew your food you know."**_

A snort interrupted the story and when Ichigo realized it was Keigo he elbowed the shorter boy sharply in the stomach-knocking the wind out of the brunet.

Inoue smiled gratefully and Ichigo nodded for her to continue.

"_**After breakfast I set out to do my morning stretches and then made my way towards the field for cheerleading practice but when I stepped out onto the field instead of being met with warm smiles and happy greetings I was met with sad frowns and painful sobs.**_

_**A trio of first year girls ran up to me with giant tears sparkling in their eyes-**_

"Uh Inoue you yourself are a first year and-

The girl cut Ichigo off as if what he had to say didn't matter and continued with her tale-Ichigo let out a sigh and let it drop.

"_**Hime-sempai, Hime-sempai," they wailed in unison "Something terrible has happened."**_

_**And so you can imagine my reaction at these words. My mouth fell open, my eyes grew wide. I dropped the remaining half of my croissant on the floor and asked them to start from the beginning.**_

If Ichigo wasn't used to buxom brunettes' story telling he would have banged his head into the nearest chalkboard or desk (which ever was closer)-Inoue was as overdramatic as ever.

"_**There, there," I smiled and patted their heads lightly "Tell Hime-sempai all about it and I vow to make everything right as rain once more."**_

_**The trio shared a look and it made me feel as though I was being a bad sempai and frightening them in some way-which I most definitely did not want to do-**_

That's great and all really, Ichigo wanted to cut in, but if you could kindly get to the fucking point and tell me exactly what happened it would be greatly appreciated. But of course he would never say such cruel and blunt words to a sweet (albeit annoying girl) like Inoue.

"_**Some one has stolen our panties!"**_

_**Now naturally being the kind of girl I am you can imagine my response can't you Kurosaki-kun?"**_

Inoue's eyes grew even wider as she looked up at Ichigo with a mixture of adoration and other expressions he'd really rather not think too much on at the moment.

He rubbed the back of his neck-feeling a bit awkward "Uh no not really."

"_**I pulled out my deluxe edition Sherlock Holmes hat and cloak and assured the girls once more that everything would be just fine. **_

"_**Hime-sempai is on the case now and I promise you that you will have your panties returned to you. **_

_**But rather than thanking me for my time-thanking me for the effort I was making-the trio just blinked at me curiously and the crying started up again-higher pitched this time around-luckily for me Tatsuki-chan came around the corner at that very moment.**_

"_**Quiet!"**_

_**It impressed me every time how Tatsuki-chan could command such obedience with one singular word.**_

_**I hugged her tightly before burying my nose in her soccer jersey-she smelled of pine and- Inoue trailed off and giggled nervously "Erm scratch that last part-anyway Tatsuki-chan offered to give me a hand in tracking down the perverts.**_

"_**Inoue you search one end of the school and I'll search the other end." Tatsuki-chan's dark eyes held my gaze as she added "This isn't the first time something like this has occurred-last Wednesday a girl in my AP class reported that her favorite pair of lacy stockings went missing-said they were a one of a kind and that she'd do anything to get them back.**_

"_**What happened? Were you able to help her get it back."**_

_**A smirk pulled at Tatsuki's lips "Something like that."**_

Ichigo decided that he heard more than enough and decided to cut Inoue off. "Okay so basically what you're trying to tell me is that there is some kind of thief or thieves running around school snatching up girls' undergarments?"

Inoue nodded.

"And during your mission-your quest to find these sick perverts you fell victim to a same or similar crime?"

"Yes," a sniffle, "How ever did you-

Ichigo shrugged-not wishing to make a big deal out of it. Now that he knew what was troubling his friend he could act.

"Inoue do you have any idea who might be behind these crimes?"

The girl shook her head "I don't know why anyone would want those panties in the first place. There not even the prettiest ones with the emerald hourglass prints on them-those ones are in my gym bag or rather they were in my gym bag-I'm actually wearing them now, wanna see?"

WHAT?!

No Ichigo did not want to see Inoue's panties-hell he didn't want to see any girls' panties but he'd rather not think about how backwards and weird he was at a time like this.

"That's not necessary Inoue," he offered a small smile of his own "Just trust me when I say this: You don't need to worry any more because I will find these guys and make them pay."

The princess cried tears of joy and hugged him tightly-practically suffocating the orange berry "Thank you Kurosaki-kun, thankyou so much!"

()()

_Ichigo wasn't a pervert so he couldn't exactly be sure of where he would find the thief (or thieves) but starting somewhere was better than nowhere. _

_And what better place was there to start then at a spot where he was sure to find a supermega band of perverts-his twin brother Kon and his fellow hentai-hornball lovin' squad._

_He found Kon up in the student teachers lounge predictably watching porn on the large flat screen tv mounted on the wall. _

_The student teacher-Hatake something or other was passed out on the couch-an orange book covering half of his face-but Ichigo had a feeling that even if the man had been awake he wouldn't have kicked Kon and his fellow perverts out. (1)_

"_KON!"_

_The large bowl of popcorn went flying out of the blond berrys' lap and on to the floor as he jumped a good 3 feet off the ground and screamed at the top of his lungs "Ahhhhh!"_

_Noticing their leaders uber freak out the other boys blotchy faces paled, eyes grew wide and the dorky quartet began to run around the room like wild chickens with their heads cut off screaming and searching for places to hide (under tables, chairs, behind curtains, the single couch that the oblivious Hatake hadn't moved from-far too deep into dream land to even register the outside noises)_

"_K-Kon-sa-sama I told you this was a bad idea," one boy stuttered out, practically tripping over his untied mismatching shoe laces, he shot Ichigo a frightened glance and then tried to hide his pudgy frame behind a lamp. Ichigo bit back a snort and stepped around the popcorn kernels and approached his twin. _

"_Kon," he began at normal volume this time "I'm not going to rat you and your perverted friends out for picking locks and trespassing again. I just want to ask you a question."_

_Kon poked his head out from under his orange and yellow striped beanie had and narrowed hazel eyes at Ichigo "How does Kon-sama know he can trust you?" The blond berry crossed his arms and sat up a little straighter grumbling about the unfairness of life or something-Ichigo didn't care enough to ask- "What are you doing here anyway Ichigo?"_

"_I just want to ask you a question." Ichigo repeated calmly._

"_Question?" brows furrowed together and Kon bent down to pick up a few kernels of corn-dusted them off on his shirt and popped a handful in his mouth._

_Ichigo scrunched up his nose "One day you're gonna die from doing that."_

_Kon stuck his tongue out childishly and ate a few more kernels grinning widely "We are born from the dirt and we are buried in dirt. Kon-sama will eat dirt if he wants because you're not the boss of me."_

_Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Your funeral."_

_Kon scowled and reached for an opened can of lime soda and tapped his foot impatiently "What do you want Ichigo?"_

_Why did he have to have such a dunce for a twin? Really? Why?_

"_I already told you why I'm here. I want to ask you a question."_

"_Hmm, Kon-sama does not feel like answering questions."_

_Ichigo's left brow twitched and he cracked his knuckles "You don't have a choice Kon," his tone darkened and Kon paled "I'm not leaving until I get an answer._

"_Fi-Fine Kon-sama isn't afraid of you." Kon bawled his own fists and put on his best "battle glare "Give me your best shot Ichi-OW!"_

_Ichigo didn't have time to mess around. It was annoying that he always had to resort to violence but Kon really gave him no other choice _

"_Are you the ones who have been running around stealing the girls panties?"_

_Kon's expression went thoughtful and then he started laughing almost manically-rubbing his palms together like that decrepit geezer in that famous American cartoon- "No Kon-sama has nothing to do with it but he has had heard of the notorious panty thief and would very much like to have an autograph, shake his hand-invite him over for a friendly game of Strip DDR-say Ichigo you wouldn't happen to know the Panty Thief would you?" (2)_

_Ichigo scowled and bopped his brother on the head a second time. "Dumbass pervert! I don't even know why I bother- of course you don't know anything-you and your friends aren't smart or discreet enough to pull off something like that."_

_Kon crossed his arms and grumbled "Kon-sama is too smart-you just get in my spotlight-stupid selfish Ichigo and your stupid orange hair!"_

_Ichigo plugged his ears with his fingers. There was no reason to waste any more time here. Kon knew nothing. It was time to continue his search elsewhere._

"_Whatever. Listen just be sure you're home at 6:30pm. Don't make Kaa-san wait around again."_

_()()_

_Ichigo blew off the rest of his classes for the day in favor of hunting down the panty thieves and when his search proved to be rather pointless he gave up and went out into the school courtyard in order to think. Perhaps a change of scenery would help him come up with a new game plan or something?_

_But as always lady luck was everywhere but with him and so his moment of serenity was short lived._

"_Is there a reason you always have that look is on your face or were you just born to be miserable?"_

_Damn Grimmjow. Didn't the guy have something better to do besides come and pester him all the damn time?_

_As per usual the older (there was only a month difference in age but older was older) youth was polluting the air (Ichigo's precious oxygen) with nicotine-purposely blowing it right in the berrys' face-pushing him right out of the only patch of sunlight available in the otherwise completely shaded area. _

_Asshole._

"_Little birdie tells me you're looking for something." Here his overconfident rival flashed a grin "Maybe I can help you out with that if you want?"_

_Ichigo raised a brow. He wasn't a fool and knew better than to accept help from Grimmjow of all people. _

"_No thanks."_

_Ichigo stood up deciding that there was no reason to continue a conversation that wasn't going anywhere and would only result in a headache. He dusted off his pants and turned to leave only to snarl angrily when Grimmjow grabbed hold of his forearm-_

"_Wait! Just hear me out for a minute before you go running off on some wild goose chase."_

_Ichigo sized up his rival-studying the other boys' face-searching for…he wasn't sure but something that would tell him that Grimmjow wasn't a total and complete ass all the time-_

_A sneer, "Why should I believe anything that comes out of your mouth?"_

"_You shouldn't but you will because everyone deserves a chance ain't that right strawberry princess?"_

_GRADE A FUCKING ASSHOLE._

"_I told you to stop calling me that."_

"_If the shoe fits."_

_Ichigo clenched and unclenched his fists "If you actually took the time to open a damn text book and read for once in your damn life you'd see that it was quite common for men to wear tights back in that era."_

_A yawn "Like I give a damn about the 18__th__ century or whatever-point is you're only bitter because you filled out those tights better than half of the girls-hell for a minute I almost forgot it was you on stage and-_

_Ichigo blinked-did he just hear Grimmjow correctly or-the way the other youth's face flushed suddenly-the way his rival turned away pointed to-hmmm interesting._

_And weird. And a bit unsettling._

_He shook his head._

"_Tights aside I'm not a damn girl so I would appreciate it if you would stop calling me one."_

_Grimmjow shook his head and then gave Ichigo a look that was difficult to describe-pity maybe?_

"_You're a funny guy Kurosaki."_

_Funny? WTF? How the hell was he funny?_

_Orange brows furrowed and Ichigo felt his irritation rising._

"_What the hell are you talking about Grimmjow?"_

_Another shaking of his rivals' head and then "Boy princess-google or bing it when you get some free time-trust me it will do you a world of good."_

_Ichigo felt more and more confused by the moment. He didn't have time or energy to continue on with this-whatever it was. He jerked his arm out of Grimmjow's hold and started walking again-only to stop when he heard hurried footsteps coming from behind._

"_What do you think you're doing?"_

_Grimmjow's grin was back in all of its blinding bright glory "Helping you find these thieves of course-what else?"_

_Ichigo shrugged. Fine. He'd give it a try. And if Grimmjow pissed him off further or wasted his time well then…he'd act accordingly._

_()()_

"_You're an idiot Kurosaki."_

_An orange brow twitched and Ichigo turned to glare at Grimmjow. "If you're just tagging along to throw insults at me without actually doing anything to help, then you can leave."_

_His blue haired rival responded with a wide Cheshire cat grin "Now why would I want to leave when we've having so much fun?" _

_Sarcasm. A timeless classic. _

_Ichigo's brow continued to twitch. "One of these days Grimmjow you're gonna mouth off to the wrong person and they'll shut you up permanently."_

"_Oh you're breaking my heart, princess." The last part came out slightly garbled as Grimmjow put a sin stick up to his mouth and lit it._

"_I'll break something else if you don't knock it off."_

_Cue yet another grin-_

_Ichigo choked back a cough as his jackass rival puffed smoke right in his face. _

"_What's the matter Kurosaki, am I polluting your precious oxygen- a shove- not exactly rough but far from playful-"why don't you make me stop?"_

_It was a taunt. A taunt meant to make the orange berry snap-loose his cool-end up in detention. Ichigo didn't have time for detention. Not with exams right around the corner. _

"_Just shut up and walk."_

"_Where exactly are we walking to?"_

_Ichigo did not bother turning back and answering-partially because he himself did not know and also because Grimmjow really wouldn't give a damn anyway._

_Speaking with Kon had proved to be a pointless waste of time. And even though there was a good chance that he might find the answers he was looking for by simply breaking into his classmates lockers Ichigo didn't fancy being sent home in a body cast-not that he couldn't handle himself against a bunch of angry hormonal teenage guys but 5 against one was never a fair fight._

_Although maybe it wouldn't be 5 against one- Ichigo glanced over at his rival only to shake his head a few seconds later- 'Pfft as if he'd help me out in a fight-he'd probably watch from the side lines and laugh.'_

_Feeling his level of irritation increasing to an unhealthy level Ichigo sped up his casual pace to a rapid walk._

"_Woah slow down where's the fire?"_

_Was it really necessary for Grimmjow to touch him-put his hands on him in order to stop him? Ichigo wasn't sure how much more of this…whatever the hell it was he could stand._

"_Don't touch me!" A snarling hiss "I'm doing this for Inoue-I promised her. You know a promise is something you do for the ones you care about-something you do for a friend."_

"_**Friend**__?" Grimmjow practically spat the word out "Is that what you call your connection with the head cheerleader, Kurosaki?"_

_A pause "And here I thought you just were anxious to find the panties and try them out for yourself."_

_Ha. Ha. More jabs. More jeers. More-_

_Ichigo saw RED….lots and lots of red…and then BLACK_

_()()_

_It had been awhile since he'd been hit hard enough and been knocked unconscious. Waking up in the nurses office with a warm rag pressed against his bloody nose….well it wasn't exactly the first time his rival had made his nose look like a squashed tomato but-_

"_Really Kurosaki what do you hope to accomplish by continuously fighting with that callous brute? Have you learned nothing from your previous fights? What will your mother think when you go home wearing a blood stained uniform again?"_

_Ichigo cursed. SHOOT ME! Why Ishida of all people-why the hell was Ishida the one to discover him all bloody and battered in the hallway-Ishida's damn lectures were so long and tiresome and only added to Ichigo's headache._

_Not that he didn't appreciate the spectacled youth's concern but-_

"_Young and free-spirited as Masaki-san may be it is not good to put that kind of stress on her heart especially when your (forgive me for saying this) idiotic father is so reckless and-_

_Yap yap Yap Ishida was like a combination of goat and a grouchy ole' bitty who liked to chase bad children off her lawn and beat em' with a broomstick-not that Ichigo had anything against goats or the elderly but-_

"_You keep this up and you won't even make it to senior year," Ishida continued his rant "Why do you let that guy get you all riled up anyway?"_

_When Ichigo did not bother to respond (hell if he could explain the relationship he had with his half Canadian rival) _

_Ishida clucked his tongue "Surely even someone as hot headed as you can see the seriousness of the situation, right Kurosaki?"_

_Ichigo's brow twitched "Are you done?"_

_Ishida muttered something unintelligible and swept a hand through his pin-straight bangs and then loosened his tie-_

_Ichigo cocked a brow "Uh are you planning to undress in here or something, Ishida?"_

_The dark haired youth went slightly pink and then shot Ichigo a glare and bent down to collect his things-carefully placing his papers, folders and books into his designer bag. "Instead of sitting in that bed and trying to seduce me you should be thinking of more constructive things to do."_

_Ichigo was going to pretend he hadn't heard a single word in Ishida's sentence-it would be the best decision to make to ensure that both teens remained sane._

_Bag now strapped over his shoulder Ishida headed for the door "Much as I would love to continue this little bonding session I have more important matters to attend to," he paused and a slight smirk (?) pulled at his lips "Do try and stay out of trouble for the next couple of days Kurosaki. I'll be out of town and won't be around to patch you back up."_

_()()_

_A few days later…_

_Mother always said that if there was a reason to second doubt himself than it probably meant he shouldn't do it!_

_And deep down Ichigo knew he shouldn't frame another-especially when he knew-had actually held a conversation with the REAL thief-the night janitor-a lonely perverted old man who had never gotten over his school girl panty fetish and simply couldn't resist- just a few short hours ago._

_It wasn't pre-planned…happened out of the blue actually. And it was all too perfect. _

_Ichigo was growing quite sick and tiered of having his friends jump up and defend him when it was entirely unnecessary. Since he was quite capable of defending himself._

_Grimmjow had gotten off scott free far too many times and even when his bastard rival did get into trouble the same slick bastard always managed to sweet talk his way out of it-not that there was anything sweet about the half Canadian to begin with but…_

_The point here was…Ichigo was being presented with a great opportunity-grand really and he would be a fool to pass it up. Although perhaps shoving ALL of the girls' panties into his rivals' locker was going a bit overboard-he could have gotten his point across with a few pairs-what did it matter anyway? This whole panty thief nonsense would probably blow over in a few days any way and-_

_Well knowing his not-so-luck-Ichigo's plan would back fire. _

_And his number one rival would probably become like a legendary hero or icon of some sort at school-every guy from 1__st__ through Senior year would look at Grimmjow in a new light and once the female population got over the fact that the blue-haired youth was the biggest pervert of them all they'd probably misinterpret it as some cry for attention and offer to be his new mama or something._

_Orange brows furrowed and Ichigo scowled._

_How annoying. This was supposed to be simple-a prank-complete the task and walk away._

_Easy breezy right?_

_Then why the hell was he outside during a free period hovering around Grimmjow's locker? Finger pads brushing against the cold painted metal-to the unknown observer Ichigo probably looked like he was having an intimate moment with the damn thing!_

_Cheeks burning a bright red Ichigo jerked his hand back and stomped away-not wishing to think further on the matter. _

_What's done was done. If his rival got in trouble…well then the bastard deserved it and if his rival didn't get in trouble…well then Ichigo would find another way to knock the self proclaimed King off of his high horse._

_()()_

_FLASH END_

_(Grimmjow)_

"Now when we get there ya have to promise that ya won't get too excited and run up to him."

Grimmjow's upper lip curled as he glared over at the golden eyed bino through the rear view mirror. Shiro was (naturally) unfazed as ever as he continued on…

"It ain't Ichi's fault o' course he probably don't even know what's goin' on-the lil' women jus' love puttin' King through the ring'r so to speak. But 'nough bout that let's go over the steps one more time. What's the first thing you do?"

Electric blues flashed and Grimmjow flicked his cigarette ash out of the window "I stay hidden in the shadows."

"Nope. That's the second step. The first step is introducin' ya self-afterall ya can't 'spect to just waltz on in a fancy nightclub without reservations. Lucky for ya I have foreseen this and have already made one for ya. Ya will be posin' as Gli. Just Gli-think of ya self like an up and coming music or movie star or somethin'. Since ya only need the name to get past the entrance anyway. After that ya will hide in the shadows or more accurately the long booth near the front entrance of the club.

Ya will then sit down and order 2 drinks while waiting for King and his date to arrive."

Wait! Back the fuck up what did the bino mean by-

An electric blue brow twitched and Grimmjow let out a growl "Date? You didn't say anything about Kurosaki having a date." His grip tightened on the steering wheel at the thought of some over-muscled gorilla with a pea-sized brain and balding head putting greasy mitts all over HIS strawberry princess.

Shiro, amused as ever snickered "Save the death glares for later Kit'n ya are gonna need it."

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

"What are you telling me Shiro?"

The bino plucked a stray lash and studied it for a moment and then blew it away and answered, "The question ain't 'bout what I'm not tellin' ya Grimm but about what I am tellin' ya get it?"

No Grimmjow did not get it. He had a freaking thong riding up his ass-electrical tape squeezing his junk and-

"Might wanna keep ya eyes on the road Kit'n-don't think Ichi would give ya much of a chance if ya run over a pregnant mother and 'er prized poodle all in one day."

Grimmjow slammed on the break in the nick of time right before said pregnant woman and her prized poodle went splat.

Only to regret it a moment later when he recognized the woman.

'_Well if it ain't the shameless cougar herself.'_

Grimmjow released a humorless snort, unbuckled his seat belt, put the car into park.

"Oooh this should be fun,"

Bouncing up and down like a child on Christmas or a fox on crack-whichever-Shiro looked all too anxious to get out of the car and greet the woman-his golden eyes glowing brightly.

Grimmjow ripped off his "wig" and pointed a finger at the powdered male, "Ohhh no you're not going any where powder puff-just stay put this'll only take me a minute or two."

And then stepped out of his car and locked the doors behind him.

()()

The years have been good to Rangiku-sensei. She barely looked a day over 33 and her style hand't changed much since Grimmjow had last seen her.

Indeed only the cougar could get away with wearing a low cut hot-pink summer dress with a white satin bow and polka-dot print flats without looking like a bloated hippo in heat. The fabric was light and airy and flattered the womans' natural curves and steadily growing baby bump.

Grimmjow sneered wishing to get this 'good Samaritan act' over as quickly as possibly-he didn't have to waste time re-introducing himself-didn't have to do anything but help the cougar across the street-shouldn't take more than a few minutes-tops.

"My, my Grimmjow-kun I always thought there was something a little different about you but I had no idea that you would use a method like _this_ in order to pick up a woman. Powder blues twinkled and Rangiku fanned herself with her sunflower hat. "Not that I'm not flattered but my husband can be incredibly jealous."

Grimmjow's brow twitched. This stupid hag thought he was trying to pick her up?! He shuddered-he'd sooner hook up with the annoying bino making kissy-faces in the backseat of his car then he would ever give this shameless cougar who dared to corrupt his-dared to taint his-Grimmjow shook his head-best not think of his rival at a time like now.

He scowled. How the hell did this harlot know it was him-granted he had removed the wig and the makeup was coming off in the heat but-

"Are you still playing hockey?" The woman continued on the one-sided conversation apparently not the least bit fazed by the fact that Grimmjow had no desire to respond. "It's been a couple of years since I've been to a game but if it means supporting a former student of mine well then…bring out the jerseys and toss me a beer."

Grimmjow willed himself not to strangle a pregnant woman right out in public-willed himself not to gag the bitch with her own scarf-willed himself not to-

"Am I right to assume that you haven't heard about Ichigo-kun's little soiree?"

WTF?

_Don't tell me-don't fucking tell me that they (they meaning Kurosaki's family) would really send out an invitation to this THING?'_

()()

(Ichigo)

As far as Ichigo knew no one had ever met the sperm donor for Tatsuki and Nel's baby-not that they would ever meet the guy since Tatsuki was a very private person or so he had thought right up until the moment Rukia drove up to the woman's house and announced that this little impromptu visit was actually a pre-planned blind date for him.

"Hime and I have been talking and we really think you should let yourself go a little even before your big night approaches," Rukia began, her silver-blue eyes sparkling in that familiar annoying way.

Inoue then added, "Which is why we-Ruki-bunny, Nel-chan, Tatzuki-chan and I have hired a male escort."

Rukia was grinning widely "And it just so happens that Nel and Tatsuki know this male escort personally."

"What the hell? I didn't ask for a male escort!"

Rukia patted Ichigo on the shoulder as if to say 'there, there' and said, "Just put your best foot forward and be all the berry you can be!"

Be all the berry you can be? What the hell was the raven-haired woman talking about? More to the point why wasn't Ichigo making his grand escape?

"Kurosaki-kun we understand that you might be a little bit nervous since you're new to the gay world and all but you have to promise not to stare or drool at when you see Kazeshini-san okay?"

Kazeshini? So that was the name of the sperm donor/escort-hmm well it seemed harmless enough for the most part.

But Ichigo felt a little offended. He wasn't the type to drool or stare (openly) at another male.

()()

(Grimmjow)

'Well wasn't that a nice little trip down memory lane,' Grimmjow grumbled sarcastically, his lip curling as he reached for his cigarette and lit it.

"Calm down kit'n its not so bad I mean ya had fun didn't ya?"

An electric blue brow twitched and Grimmjow shot a glare at the ever predictable grinning bino. "You're damn lucky I'm not wearing my boots today else you'd be in a world of pain powder puff."

Not that he hadn't appreciated "the rescue" because he certainly had but he wasn't about to let Shiro know it.

Golden eyes flashed or glazed over-whichever-as Shiro purred and moved in a little too close for Grimmjow's comfort. "Promises, promises but when will ya deliver eh Grimm?"

The answer. NEVER. Although the powdered bino had a similar body type, height, devilish grin-he was not nor would he ever be the orange strawberry-not that Shiro wasn't attractive but-

The bino curled a white blond lock of hair around his finger-reminding Grimmjow of the dimwitted cheerleaders back in highschool. It was almost scary how well the other male could imitate a chick. "My sources tell me Kings' meetin' his date right now. So we best be on our way, kay Grimm?"

What? Now?!

Of course Grimmjow couldn't let on that he was having a slight panic on the inside-couldn't admit that he wasn't fully prepared to reunite with the orange berry yet-he had to play it cool.

"I'm confused I thought you said the date was still a couple of hours away."

"True, true but ya see I'm a very busy man and I got places to be and pretty boys to bang so I'll jus' drop ya off and ya can wing it from there!"

"But what about the plan?"

It was true that Grimmjow still did not feel tickled pink about meeting his former rival in heels and a dress but if the orange berry had any doubts he would quickly put said doubts to rest.

"Plan?" Shiro unzipped his bustier and shimmied out of his Capri pants and cocked a pierced brow "What ever do ya mean?"

If he wasn't required to keep his eyes on the road at all times Grimmjow would have reached back and cuffed the smartass albino. "Don't get smart with me-!" Taking one hand off the wheel he swiped at the air-wishing it was the bino instead- "I'm talking about "this" (motioning to his outfit) "This-what is the point of all this?!

Shiro (who had moved to the back seat (it was much easier to dress with the extra space) pulled out a compact mirror and makeup remover and wiped his face before answering the blue haired male "Ya didn't really believe all that did ya Grimm?"

Grimmjow felt the familiar urge to strangle the bino rise up-threaten to boil over once more "Then what the hell was the point of all this then, _**huh?"**_

Golden eyes shined with glee and Shiro removed his wig "Why my amusement o' course!" He reached down and slipped on a pair of black jeans over his boxer briefs and it was at this moment that Grimmjow noticed a small glittering ring-and without meaning to do so-without planning on it-he let his mind drift and carry him away for a moment…

()()

(Ichigo)

"Sorry I'm late. Filming lasted longer than we had originally planned on but no harm done right?"

Ichigo turned his attention away from the television and towards the door at the sound of an unfamiliar masculine voice. It took a moment or two for a face to accompany the owner of the voice since Nel, Rukia and Inoue were all blocking the door with their very feminine frames-Ichigo could only make out a head of dark gravity defying hair with crimson red highlights.

Could this be-?

"Hmph, and yet you still had time to stop at the corner bakery I see."

Ichigo grinned at the second voice. This one not a stranger.

Pressing the mute button on the tv remote he moved off the couch and went to greet his best friend of 21 years and counting.

Only a woman like Tatsuki could get away with wearing soccer cleats and a business suit-she was 10 years younger than the rest of the members in her law firm and yet that didn't stop her from becoming one of the best lawyers Karakura Town had seen in years.

"Hey Tatsuki."

"Don't you hey me Ichigo-get over here!"

The woman smirked at Ichigo before pulling him into a some what embarrassing head lock-really did she have do this when there was a guest around-at least he assumed this guest must be the Kazeshini his friends told him about-not that it mattered-it wasn't like he had agreed to date the guy or anything.

"So you're the Ichi I've been hearing so much about," the man let out an appreciate whistle and Ichigo turned a little red-much to his friends' amusement.

Tatsuki nodded and tightened her hold. "Yeah this here is our Ichigo-he tends to turn heads no matter where he goes."

"That's because Itsugo is a nice guy," Nel smiled affectionately and then winked at Kazeshini "And that tight little bottom is just one of his many perks."

Ichigo scowled but that did not stop the women from continuing.

"It's the hair-not too many natural tangerine heads left in Karakura Town these days you know." Rukia chimed in, her silver blues sparkling with delight.

Inoue nodded and then decided that it was apparently story time "Mm hmm its true it's there was this one time at the laundry mat when Kurosaki-kun was-

()()

(Grimmjow)

One make out session did not equal romantic interest. One fondling session did not equal burning lust. One no holds barred bare back fucking session in the backseat of his prized sports car did not equal cheating-especially since neither Grimmjow nor the bino who was riding him so damn shamelessly were officially tied down to anyone.

In Grimmjow's defense it had come about from out of freaking no where-

'_Alright so show me the goods.'_

"_Didn't you get enough of seeing me naked earlier?'_

'_Nah not really I wasn't even payin' 'ttention to ya then. I only said that I was lookin' cuz I like to push ya.'_

'_What the hell is that supposed to mean? You don't even know me.'_

"_True. Technically I don't know ya but I know enough-now stop stallin' show me the goods Grimm unless… you're," a pause and a wide teasing grin "not quite as well endowed as ya've led others like Ichi to believe.'_

_Electric blues flashed and darkened to a nearly pitch black color. He was going to put the bino's "doubts" to rest real fast._

_Ignoring the burn as he ripped off some of his well-trimmed pubic hairs along with the electric tape Grimmjow exposed his many treasures-quickly shutting up the other male._

_Well for a few minutes at least-_

_Shiro licked his lips "Heh, but can ya use it Kit'n?"_

()()

What kind of pussy (no pun intended) would he have been if he backed out of a challenge? Shiro was too damn cocky for his own good and the golden-eyed bastard asked for it so Grimmjow delivered.

Simple as that. Only not so simple as he released his load inside the slutty bino Grimmjow now felt bile rising up in his throat as it fully dawned on him.

_**WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?**_

Grimmjow let out a growl "You've had your fun. Now get off!"

Sounding only slightly out of breath, the grin having never left his face Shiro expertly detached himself and teased, "Awww did I wear ya out that fast kit'n?"

Grimmjow let out another growl and this time he did not stop himself from smacking the bino clear across the face. Shrio let out a yowl that sounded a lot like a dying rooster and then retaliated with a flying round house kick-how he managed it in a cramped backseat…well Grimmjow didn't really give a damn about that at the moment.

_**()()**_

(Ichigo)

"Kazeshini is an actor," Tatsuki began as she removed her blazer and threw it over the cozy little love seat that Inoue and Rukia were now occupying-not that either woman cared-far more interested in eating each other's faces then in the conversation-

Ichigo resisted the urge to bury his head into the couch and never come back up for air as he listened with half an ear to what was being said.

"Maybe you've seen him on day time television although he recently made the transition to night time dramas and-

"Yeah but not by choice. That pigeon toed agent of mine went ahead and made the decision on his own. Bastard thought I would be better suited for some teeny bopper drama dealing with the supernatural-they call me the modern day reaper."

Nel cocked her head to the side thoughtfully "Well you do have that exotic creature type of vibe going on around you."

It wasn't an exaggeration-what with Kazeshini's pale iridescent colored eyes, slightly pointed ears, gravity defying two-toned hair, his skin like the color of a bronze eagle out in the middle of a desert covered in red sand, body tightly confined in tight black material-all sharp angles and strong muscles-very little left to the imagination -not that Ichigo had noticed or anything.

Kazeshini let out a snort "More like the lil' bastard caught wind of what I do off screen."

Ichigo blinked "Off screen?"

What did the man mean by off screen?

A look passed between Kazeshini, Tatsuki and Nel and just as the green-haired woman opened her mouth to answer, Rukia, who had apparently decided to give Inoue's tongue a rest for now, beat her to it

"Off screen indeed. Still getting plenty of time in the spotlight though, right Kaze?"

Kazeshini smirked "Somethin' like that."

Ichigo still felt baffled. Unless-he was hoping that perhaps just maybe his friends had been joking about the whole escort thing or whatever. Not that he was judging or anything but-

"Anyway enough about me I wanna hear more about Ichi."

All eyes were on the orange berry now.

Ichigo (if he were the type to do so) would have whined out 'Who said I wanted to be in the spotlight?'

TBC

Coming soon…

Part 2

Liquor and tigers and a love hotel?...OH MY! And no I have not forgotten about the reunion…its coming…just be a lil' more patient.

_The student teacher-Hatake something or other was passed out on the couch-an orange book covering half of his face-but Ichigo had a feeling that even if the man had been awake he wouldn't have kicked Kon and his fellow perverts out. (1)_

A character from the manga/anime series….NARUTO…Hatake Kakashi or Kaka-sensei. GRINS. Gotta love it!

_Kon's expression went thoughtful and then he started laughing almost manically-rubbing his palms together like that decrepit geezer in that famous American cartoon- "No Kon-sama has nothing to do with it but he has had heard of the notorious panty thief and would very much like to have an autograph, shake his hand-invite him over for a friendly game of Strip DDR-say Ichigo you wouldn't happen to know the Panty Thief would you?" (2)_

2) I'm sure everyone whose anyone is familiar with the American Cartoon the Simpson's… and familiar with the character who rubs his palms together….Mr. Burns. I was thinking of it while writing this scene (shrugs) I'm random like that.

THANK YOU FOR READING!


	13. Chapter SEVEN B

Disclaimer: Believe it or not some of my ideas do in fact come from stories featuring malexfemale couplings…heh even with that said I do not own BLEACH!

A/N I really have a hard time understanding why the fanbase for my fics always seem to drop after a certain point…is it just lack of interest or something else? Anyways ladies and gents after a long winter Seahorse resurfaces once more….

ANE-CHANNNNN I know you can hear me…=)

_DRUNKEN SEAHORSE _

7B

(Grimmjow)

There was no need to jump to conclusions just yet.

Just because Shiro had given him directions that led to a high-class love hotel did not necessarily mean that Kurosaki was some type of closet whore.

Perhaps the strawberry princess was simply staying in a love hotel because his house was under reconstruction or something?

Or maybe the bino had been pulling his leg all along and Kurosaki wouldn't show at all?

Over the years Grimmjow had learned that just about anything was possible.

And as he stood waiting inside the hotel lobby watching the seconds on the clock tick by one after another he couldn't shake the feeling that what ever happened tonight could quite possibly change everything.

()()()

(Ichigo)

Traditional blind dates as far as Ichigo knew consisted of dinner, some type of movie, dancing, drinking at café/coffee shop. Not very original but favored classics.

But Kazeshini didn't seem like the cliché type of guy so there was a good chance the escort was taking him somewhere unusual.

Ichigo had seen enough hitch-hiker horror films and he wasn't feeling too confident about being out on an empty highway with a man he hardly knew.

Not that he would let his uneasiness show.

Playing it casual was the best route.

"So where are we headed?"

Much to the orange berry's annoyance Kazeshini did not answer-well not verbally anyway-a grin was the only response Ichigo received not that it was helpful since a grin could mean just about anything.

On the bright side Ichigo was not some helpless whelp so if Kazeshini turned out to be some sort of serial killer he'd be ready for it!

()()

No not a serial killer but a child at heart. Kind of like goat face only with better hair.

"I think the best romances start out with a bit of laughter." Iridescent eyes glittered "Tatsuki tells me yours is rather infectious but the word of a woman doesn't mean much so I decided to find out for myself."

Kazeshini had reached a fork in the endless road and then drifted off to the right.

After a minute or so a large tent came into view-seemingly growing in size as the car moved nearer and nearer.

"Nel told me you had a fondness for large cats so I thought this would be a perfect way to start our date."

A large white tiger stalked past in the dark of the night just then-its shiny coat being lit up by the headlights of the vehicle.

Orange brows furrowed. He knew that all towns (even Karakura) had their secrets but a fully grown man eating tiger out in the middle of an abandoned forest was a little…

Again not wishing to show his uneasiness Ichigo quipped, "The circus is in town, damn wish I'd known I would have brought my camera."

As if on cue three more white talkers stalked past. Unable to stop him self, a bit of worry slipped into Ichigo's tone "Shouldn't those things be on leashes or something?"

The escort unbuckled his seat belt and leaned over, murmuring lowly in Ichigo's ear "Technically their not supposed to let the tigers out of their cages but Akira owes me a favor and since his old man isn't 'round now is as good a time as any. He doesn't know I brought you along but I doubt he'll mind. "

Ichigo didn't know who this 'Akira' was but he was hoping at the very least that the guy knew how to keep the tigers in check.

He felt the fine hairs on his arms prickle when one of the tigers let out a yawn-exposing its razor sharp canines-

"Anyway I didn't drive all the way out here so you could stare at the tigers from a far. Come on let's go meet em'."

Sure, sure what was the harm in meeting a couple of full-grown tigers?

Waltzing into a lair of a natural predator should be a breeze right?

Wrong!

"So you're suicidal?"

Ichigo didn't want to come off as a coward but he'd only just met Kazeshini and he wasn't quite sure he trusted the guy.

Even if the tigers were trained not to attack what if something went wrong? Accidents happened all the time.

What if the tigers didn't like the way he looked? The way he smelled? Not that Ichigo had ever received any complaints before but animals were different. Their noses ten times more sensitive than a puny little human like him.

Ichigo could picture it now,.

The remains of his body discovered off the side of the road-breaking 6 o clock news. Every man woman and children in Karakura would tune in and cry out in horror-panic.

A riot would break out, shot guns and pitch-forks raised high, his idiotic father at the front of the line

"_**The tigers-those damn tigers killed my boy-my first born-KILL THE TIGERS!"**_

Not that his mother would let goat face or any other angry riot member get that far but-

"Come on Ichigo there's nothing to be scared of. This will be fun, trust me."

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow's feet started to burn not that this was the first time he had to stay standing for a long period of time but usually he was able to move around. Whereas right now he was stuck inside alcove of a fake stonewall.

Whoever designed this love hotel was a total dumb ass in his opinion.

()()

(Ichigo)

In Ichigo's defense it was only because he had accepted the offered bottle of dark red liquid from Kazeshini otherwise he never would have worked up the courage to approach the tiger. Taking note that the animals' paws could probably swipe his head clean off with one strike.

Downing a little more of the wine (or was it sake?) Ichigo still felt unsure and yet it didn't matter. He moved closer and closer to the great tiger-Kazeshini not far behind for the escort had taken upon himself to guide the berry, placing larger hands on slim shoulders, pushing Ichigo that extra needed foot.

Ichigo felt a little light headed but he was still coherent enough to make sense of things. Counting the stripes of the tigers' back-marveling at the artic blue of the tigers' eye.

He'd read that it was bad to look a large wild animal in the eye because it was often interpreted as some sort of challenge but he'd heard that it was better to look an animal straight in the eye because it meant you (the human) were demonstrating your power and control over the great beast.

Not that there wasn't anything truly beast like about this beautiful tiger-Ichigo froze-determined not to make any sudden moves as the tiger sniffed him curiously-he could feel his lips pulling upwards-could feel his entire body fall lax as he concluded that maybe just maybe this tiger liked him.

"You can go ahead and pet him, Yubi won't bite." Kazeshini encouraged in a low whisper.

Ichigo nodded figuring he'd come this far so why back out now?

Perhaps the liquid he was consuming bit by bit wasn't really all that potent since he wasn't staggering or fumbling or slurring like the average drunk?

Ichigo only protested a little when Kazeshini hoisted him off the ground and on to the tigers back.

"Hey what are you-?!"

"Shhh you'll like this."

Following Kazeshini's words came a light pat on the ass. Under normal circumstances-meaning when he wasn't under the influence of sweet alcohol Ichigo would have scowled and clocked the other man right in the face-as it was…

"But what if I-I mean I don't want to hurt it."

Kazeshini laughed and teased, "Hime tells me you wouldn't hurt a fly so stop worrying so much and enjoy!"

A slap to the rear and the tiger released a loud roar and sped off into the dark of night at lightning speed-eyes wide as flying saucers-heart pounding like a thousand beating drums-letting out a shriek that was far from manly Ichigo ignored all this and held on to the great animal for dear life.

There was only one other time when Ichigo had found himself in a similar situation and granted it wasn't a tiger but…

_FLASHBACK_

"_We should be back with in a couple of weeks but if you need anything just call this number."_

_Ichigo tucked a slip of paper into his pocket and tried not to wince at the uncomfortable sensation of being pulled into one of uncle Kaiens' bone crushing hugs. _

_From the corner of his eye he could see his cousin grinning wide enough to a crack lens on a camera as he helped aunt Miyako lift the last of her bags into the already overstuffed van. _

_The couple were going away to celebrate their 10__th__ year anniversary. And needed someone to watch over the ranch in their absence._

'_Don' worry so much Tou-chan," Shiro assured as he pushed the older man towards the van, " Ichi'll be fine in my care ain't that right King?'_

_Ichigo could do nothing but nod his head. _

_Why he had agreed to spend his summer baby sitting farm animals in the first place he honestly couldn't say._

_Well no scratch that-Ichigo knew exactly why he had agreed-it was because his mother had asked him to and he always did what his mother asked him to do._

_And why? Because he enjoyed seeing the woman smile._

_Still he couldn't help but wonder why he was the only one being subjected to such torture when everyone else (meaning his twin brother and his sisters were free to run around and do what he/she pleased._

_Sometimes life truly did suck._

_()()_

_The first few days were okay. Shiro showed him the basics:_

_milking cows, feeding hens, brushing horses, cleaning the pens, etc._

_But then one afternoon out of the blue when Ichigo was knee deep in pig slop Shiro announced-_

'_Well it's been fun King but now that ya know whatya gotta do I'm gonna jet'_

_Orange brows furrowed together and Ichigo turned to his cousin questioningly._

"_What do you mean? Where are you going?"_

_Grin bright and eyes glittering Shiro pulled off his stained overalls and revealed what could only be described as some sort of odd looking space suit underneath._

_What the hell was his cousin up to now?_

_Ichigo got his answer-by way of a honk-a honk coming from a bus that is._

"_Wish we'd had some more time together but I figure ya will still be here when I get back so,"_

_The bino adjusted the straps of a backpack (which had seemingly appeared from out of nowhere) on his shoulders and set off towards the bus without further explanation._

_Ichigo scowled and read the logo on the side of the bus._

_CAMP SPACE-AWAY_

_He hoped at the very least that at least Shiro would be around to keep him company but no the shitty bino bastard decided to enroll in space camp at the last minute._

'_Ya are lookin' at the future astronaut King. I'm headin' to the moon and I'm gonna create space cocaine.'_

_Space cocaine? Was there really such a thing? _

_Ichigo rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to run up and give his powder-haired cousin a good swift kick in the ass as the other youth boarded the bus-wasting no time in claiming the nearest window seat-with a salute and a cackle-something only Shiro could pull off with out looking like an escaped nut-job-the bino and 12 other "astronauts in training" disappeared in a cloud of dirt and dust._

_Ichigo let his bangs fall into his face (he was trying out a new look for the summer) and let out a sigh._

'_Well, now what?'_

_()()_

_Ichigo enjoyed solitude as much as the next person but after 10 days any guy would grow bored and lonely. After all life wasn't some sort of fairy tale where he could talk one on one with the animals. _

_Oh how he wished for a human companion._

_()()_

_Be careful what you wish for. _

_His estranged aunt Kukaku-sometimes the woman was so barbaric that Ichigo questioned if she was truly a women at all-shoving mountains of food into her mouth, chugging tall glasses of milk (and or the occasional bottle of rum) like a man. Propping her filthy cow-girl boots on top of an old rickety rocking chair-pointing her chopsticks at him "You need to stop moping around and get yourself a girl."_

_When Ichigo said nothing a sly grin slid across the womans' face as she added, "Unless it's not a girl you're after, hmm?"_

_Again Ichigo said nothing because he honestly wasn't sure how to respond._

_And as it turned out not issuing a response was the wrong option-it only prompted Kukaku's continuous teasing, "So you are a fairy in flight then is that it I-chi-go?" She leaned so far across the table giving him a perfect view of her cleavage-not that he had any real interest in it._

"_My dear sister will be so disappointed when she finds out."_

_Ichigo turned pale and then made a plea to his aunt "Please don't tell-I mean I'm not-that is-I-," he mentally cursed himself as he stumbled over his words. _

_Right. Real convincing. _

"_That is-what I mean was-_

_One eye narrowed on him-the other focused on the steaming hot bowl of soup-"You what Ichigo?"_

_How should he answer this?_

_Ah ha! That's the ticket!_

"_I'm just not ready to date anyone. All of the girls in my class are too pushy and-_

_Kukaku cut Ichigo off with a laugh "What's the matter Ichigo does a confident woman scare you?"_

_The answer to this was both yes and no but the orange berry wasn't going to tell her that._

"_I'm focusing on my studies and my team right now. When and if the right girl _

_-"Or guy," Kukaku unhelpfully inserted-another grin splitting her face_

_Ichigo shot his too-nosy-too forward-too obnoxious-for her own good aunt a dirty glare._

_This only amused the woman more much to his annoyance._

"_When I find the right person (if she refused to let it drop he might as well just meet her half way) you'll be the first to know."_

"_Hmph," Kukaku raised the bowl of soup to her lips downed the broth in record time. Then she slammed it down onto the table and reached for another glass of milk. Not just any glass of milk but his glass of milk not that Ichigo cared since he didn't have much of an appetite anyway._

_A minute or two later the legs of the chair scraped against the worn down linoleum floor as Kukaku stood up and announced "Consider this your lucky summer Ichigo because you've just earned yourself grade A crash course in Kakuku's Dating 101. We'll start," she glanced down at her watch and counted the seconds "NOW!"_

_Ichigo blinked stupidly for a few minutes. And then it dawned on him and he panicked-well not panicked exactly but-_

"_I'm ah flattered and all Aunt Kukaku but I don't want a-the rest of the words lips died in his throat as the woman puffed smoke straight from her wooden pipe right into his face._

_The berry began hacking violently and tried to distance him self from the crazy woman._

_He didn't get very far._

_()()_

_The following day…_

"_I'm going to the market but that doesn't mean you can slack off while I'm gone because trust me when I say that this farm has eyes and ears every where," Kukaku grinned at Ichigo evilly as she polished her sword (where the sword had come from he'd really rather not know) "and if you try to weasel your way out of my training, I'll know."_

_Training riiiight that's what she was calling it. But Ichigo knew the truth the woman wished to do nothing more than to humiliate him all for her pure amusement and enjoyment._

"_And remember Bonnie-chan here is Ganju's baby so be nice to her." Kakaku added as she gave one of the Shiba familys' wild boars (well not so wild after Ganju rescued them and nursed the lot back to health) a friendly pat. _

_Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah I get it. You can go Bonnie and I will be fine."_

_()()_

_Being careful not to step any deeper into the slop and shit that was absolutely necessary Ichigo approached the infamous pig er boar affectionately referred to as Bonnie-chan._

_Trying to ignore the smell and the awkwardness of the entire situation he kneeled down so he could face the pig er boar and recited exactly what Kukaku instructed him to say "My fair Bonnie would you do me the honor of becoming my boar?"_

_The boar snorted and turned its rear-end to the berry as if insulted that he would dare ask her such a thing._

_Ichigo swept a hand through his hair and let out a sigh 'Let's try this again-perhaps it would be better if I introduced myself first. Ganju did say that pigs (boars) can be a bit skittish.'_

_On his second attempt Ichigo decided to kneel even lower and even offered a gift to the animal._

_The boar took a curious sniff but made no move to eat the nuts from out of his hand._

_Ichigo reasoned that maybe this boar did not like to be fed by way of human hands and so he set the food down and let the boar eat at her leisure._

_()()_

_The sun was at its highest peak when the berry finally made some real progress-Bonnie was even letting him pet her now. _

_It was weird-bonding with a boar of all things especially since they weren't particularly cute or fluffy like a puppy or a kitten-_

"_Kukaku told me you don't like humans much. I can't say I blame you,"_

_The boars thin tale twitched-seemed Bonnie was listening quite intently "Even though I am one I don't like to be around humans much either."_

_The pig was looking straight at him now-beady brown-nearly black eyes locking with his own cinnamon and coffee browns_

"_I mean they are so rowdy and obnoxious and some of them never know how to keep their hands to themselves."_

_An image of his rival popped into his mind just then and Ichigo quickly shook it away. _

_The boar snorted-only it was a different snort than her previous snorts-this one seemed sympathetic or something._

_He smiled at the boar and patted her lightly "You're mocking me too are you? Even a boar finds my suffering to be funny is that it?" _

_She snorted again._

"_Glad I can be your daily source of entertainment."_

_The boars' eyes softened a bit._

_Ichigo let out another sigh and let himself sink deeper into the slop and mud- he gazed up at the sky and then back down at the boar "Anyway I propose that you and I-_

_Another snort. Then another and then a snapping of twigs._

_Ichigo turned half expecting it to be Kukaku creeping up from out of the bushes._

_It wasn't her._

"_Propose? Is that why you never welcome any of my advances?"_

_It was just his imagination. The hot beaming sunrays were frying his brain. Farm life was making him delusional. He should probably call up goat face and Kaa-san and ask them to come and bring him home. _

_Yes, that was the one and only explanation for hearing his rivals voice here and now._

"_You're in love with this pig?!"_

_Only it wasn't a figment of his imagination. Some how some way his damn rival had taken harassment to a whole new level and followed him all the way out to the countryside._

_The strong scent of nicotine and babys' breath mingled with the balmy farm breeze._

_Ichigo held back a sigh. How he had missed these fresh and clean scents._

_He stood up and turned around to glare at the single biggest pain in his ass in the world "What the hell are you doing here, asshole?"_

_The blue-haired punk took a few steps forward and stood there with his arms crossed over his chest-the very same chest that Ichigo was desperately trying not to drool over at that moment-it didn't matter if his rival was clothed or not-nothing could shield away those all too perfect-_

"_Sure you can stand there with that sour puss look on your face but we both know the truth," Grimmjow moved closer-puffing smoke while he spoke, grinning around the cancer stick he insisted on having in his mouth "You're happy I'm here because you missed me."_

_Honestly Ichigo hadn't given his rival much thought all summer-not to say that he hadn't had the occasional liquid dream but-_

"_Who the hell could miss you?" Ichigo snorted in disgust-although truthfully he wasn't disgusted in the least-far from it. _

"_The whole reason I came here was so that I could get as far away from you as possible."_

_The furthest thing from the truth. But he wasn't going to let the other teen know this._

_Electric blues flickered and Grimmjow took another step forward "Is that so?" Right And cue Cheshire cat grin, "Guess you're going to have to make a better effort then next-time."_

_Next time? Who the hell said anything about a next time and why on gods green earth did Grimmjow have to look so damn good in cowboy chaps? Duh because it was leather and no one rocked leather like the half Canadian did._

_Ichigo looked away when he felt his face start to grow warm._

_Bonnie was looking at him curiously or maybe with pity. It was hard to tell with boars._

'_Maybe if I just ignore him and go back to what I was doing he'll leave."_

_It was worth a shot._

_Ichigo knelt down to continue his conversation with the boar "Anyway as I was saying before he dropped in I propose that you and I-_

"_Why waste your time on some PIG when I'm right here and waiting, Kurosaki?"_

_Ichigo didn't want to risk turning back around just to correct his rival on his mistake of referring to Bonnie as a Pig when she was quite obviously a boar-so he opted to tune Grimmjow out-or at least he tried to-it was rather difficult when the cocky blue-haired teen started whistling his own rendition of 'Here comes the bride'_

_An orange brow twitched and Ichigo stood up once more-apparently ignoring Grimmjow was out of the question-the only way he was going to get rid of the other youth was by kicking the ass straight back to whatever hole he had climbed out of-_

"_Let me guess right now you are thinking up a way to convince that four-legged beast of yours to attack me."_

_A loud squeal/snorting noise-Ichigo was knocked flat on his ass as the 'beast' rushed passed him at blinding speed and -sending the overconfident youth flying into the next pen-then with out further warning Bonnie speared Grimmjow with her curled tusks-_

_()()_

_It would have been funny if Ichigo wanted actual bodily harm to come to his rival._

_If the boar didn't have blood smearing both its snout and tusks as it speared Grimmjow a second time-leaving a large gaping hole in the older teens' side-_

_Ichigo knew he had to get up and do something and he had to do it fast or Bonnie-chan the misunderstood boar with a bad temper was going to kill Grimmjow._

_But how could he get between the boar and the other youth with out getting injured himself?_

'_Now's not the time or place to worry about that you idiot-hurry up and do something!'_

_When all else fails let your conscience be your guide._

_()()_

"_Okay that's enough he's learned his lesson."_

'_And then some.' _

_Of course Ichigo didn't expect the boar to listen to him on the first try. SO he gave it another go. This time calling out to the boar in a commanding tone "Bonnie I said that's enough!"_

_The boar froze and then finally detached its self from its victim-Ichigo winced as more blood oozed out of Grimmjow's side as Bonnie-chan pulled out its tusks at a ridiculously slow, almost agonizing pace._

'_Well at least the hard part is over.'_

_The sigh of relief came to soon-as if she was playing some type of cruel joke the boar attacked again-flipping the blue-haired youth over and pounding on his back with its feet. _

_Ichigo felt his stomach churn, his eye brows disappeared into his hair line at the sight. He cupped his hand over his mouth-sure he had seen a lot of shit in his life-blood was nothing new-seeing his rival bleeding was nothing new-hell he and Grimmjow butted heads constantly but…._

'_That was at least fair ground…this is just-_

_The boar was making a horrible noise as she continued her assualt…it was…unlike anything else the berry had ever heard before. _

_In any other scenario, thought Ichigo, a helpless Grimmjow was rather amusing-now was not such a time._

_And speaking of his bastard rival baring the ear-splitting less than masculine howling he had heard at the beginning of the attack Grimmjow hadn't said much._

_This concerned Ichigo-a hell of a lot more than he would admit out loud if asked._

_But surely bold cockiness aside anyone with a giant hole in their stomach should be bitching up a storm at the very least-_

_Ichigo shook his head. Now was not the time. Moving as quickly as the mud would allow him to the orange haired youth reached for the boar-half questioning his own sanity he leapt and climbed aboard the boar._

_Just because Ganju and on occasion Kukaku could ride a boar with out breaking a sweat didn't mean that Ichigo could-_

_None of this mattered._

'_I need to draw her attention away from him. I need to get her off of him somehow and if this is the only way then so be it!'_

_Easier said then done._

_The boar released that god awful unnatural noise once more and before Ichigo could even blink he was thrown off the creatures back-had more than just the wind knocked out of him._

_()()_

_Pitch black. Ichigo was quite accustomed to it-so much in fact that he almost welcomed it like a security blanket._

_()()_

_Could have been hours-quite possibly days or even weeks until the light graced Ichigo with its presence once more. And it seemed to be accompanied by a cool pail of water…_

'_Wait! Water?'_

_Ichigo slowly opened his eyes to a new day or at least he was pretty sure it was a new day but the large flesh-toned melons were throwing him off a bit._

_The berry moved to sit up only to be pushed back down by a pair of hands._

_It took Ichigo a few minutes to realize that Kukaku had returned._

_In short she didn't look the least bit pleased._

"_Dumbass! I can't even leave you alone for a couple of hours."_

_Hours. The woman had clearly said hours so that meant he hadn't been in a coma but merely knocked unconscious._

"_You should count yourself lucky that that equally idiotic brother of mine taught Bonnie-chan how to hold back or we'd be sending both you and that shit ass companion of yours to the morgue."_

_Ignoring the way the room was still slightly spinning Ichigo bolted upright at the mention of his rival, flew out of the bed and raced down the hall-completely ignoring his aunts bellowing command to "GET BACK HERE!"_

_He didn't care about any of that._

_Kukaku could scold him later. Right now he had to check on Grimmjow. Make sure the bastard wasn't in a coma or crippled for life or something._

_()()_

_Ichigo hesitated outside the door-mentally preparing himself for the worst before stepping inside._

_()()_

_He couldn't decide if he should scowl or let his lips curl upwards at the sight of Grimmjow sitting on the edge of the bed battered, bruised and tightly bandaged yet still managing to look as arrogant as ever- hair coiffed and gelled and slightly damp with perspiration, toffee tinted lips smirking around that damn cancer stick, creating silver-blue smoke rings with each puff- beloved leather jacket loosely draping off his wide and well-muscled shoulders-_

_Ichigo cemented this moment-this image in his mind and then cleared his throat and came out and say what needed to be said,_

"_You survived."_

_A snort, "Tch come on princess, you should know by now its going to take a hell of a lot more than some dumb pig to put me down." _

"_She's a boar and you shouldn't have insulted her."_

_Grimmjow sneered, "Boar, pig don't make no damn difference to me. Crazy bitch should be put down."_

_Ichigo scowled. "She's just an animal. She probably didn't even realize what she was-_

_Grimmjow cut him off- "Yeah, whatever listen princess since you're here and all why don't you sit and stay for awhile. Seeing as I'm wounded and all I deserve a lil' __**therapeutic healing,**__ wouldn't you agree?" He patted the empty spot on the bed and leered-_

_The words therapeutic and healing did not have perverse meanings….except for when his rival said them that is._

_Ichigo rolled his eyes and turned to leave-_

"_Hey Kurosaki wait a minute!"_

_It had been a long and tiring affair. That was the one and only reason Ichigo turned back around and raised a brow in question."_

_Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his jaw. Seems like he was having a bit of difficulty saying whatever it was he wished to say. _

_Minutes passed…Fierce browns met electric blues and some how some way both rivals were locked into a staring contest._

_In fact Ichigo was so deeply locked into the staring contest he almost missed the murmured,_

"_Thanks."_

_()()_

He'd gotten lucky last time…didn't mean he should tempt fate a second time…especially since someone else's life wasn't on the line.

Besides he didn't think it would be considered sexy to show up in a body cast on the night of his big coming out party.

Then again the rare person or two might-Ichigo shook his head-not even bothering to complete the thought and forced him self to relax and focus.

'_I will not let this tiger get the better of me!'_

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow knew he was risking the chance of seeing his former rival for the first time in a good long time if he moved out from his hiding place but when a mans' gotta piss he's gotta piss!

()()

TBC

SIDE C teaser…

Fists curled-ripping open the skin of his palms. Grimmjow ignored the blood pooling around his feet and continued to dig his blunt finger-nails into his flesh, snarling, growling and hissing like any pissed off creature would.

How the fuck had Kaze found out about it _his _orange berry?

THANKS FOR READING


	14. Chapter SEVEN C

Disclaimer: Nothing has changed I do not own Ichi-berry or his berry berry bleach comrades! I do own a seahorse printed back- pack though, lol and yes I know I'm a dork.

A/N Ridiculously short chapter. Yes but the next one won't be.

What's to happen next…that for SLY to know and for you to find out right Ane-rainbow?

THANK YOU TO ALL WHO STILL FAITHFULLY FOLLOW THE RANDOMNESS THAT IS SLY AND HER WORKS!

GrimmIchi, others, AU, Punctuation, Grammar, Run-Ons, Flashbacks, etc and yeah…

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

7C

(Ichigo)

Some hours later…

Up until now Ichgo always thought that when couples fall all over each other after a couple of drinks that it was clearly exaggerated because said couple enjoyed getting attention. Hollywood glam and what not.

However now as he was living a very familiar-practically dead ringer moment in his life Ichigo realized that he might have to rethink his previous thought because while Kazeshini was certainly not his lover the berry couldn't exactly find reason to complain when the other man toppled over him.

The delightful buzz in his brain was telling him to just go with it!

So rather than giving Kazeshini a black eye Ichigo welcomed the other mans' touch-slightly cool hands trailing along his skin.

Even though he personally didn't think there was anything particularly special or sexy about the human ribcage, breastbone or waistline the escorts' opinion seemed to differ.

Kazeshini insisted on touching Ichigo every where and where the man didn't touch with his hands he touched with his tongue-leaving a hot and sticky trail along the orange berrys' neck and face-baring all but the lips of course.

Not that he hadn't tried that route for he most certainly had but Ichigo had not permitted entry-for yes even in his current intoxicated state kissing Kazeshini or letting Kazeshini kiss him felt wrong.

The fact that they were still in plain view of the public didn't help matters.

"I can tell that you're new to this sort of thing Ichi so I'm gonna come out and ask you now, how far will ya let me take this?"

Apparently when horny, Kazeshini's vocabulary level dropped and started sounded a lot like Shiro-a little too much like Shiro actually-not that there was anything wrong with the way his powdered cousin spoke but-

Ichigo shook his head-mentally scolding himself for thinking of his perverted cousin at a time like this.

'_What the hell is the matter with me?'_

Something was palming his crotch now-blame it on the alcohol or his bad habit of drifting off at the most opportune moments but it took Ichigo a moment to realize that it was Kazeshini's hand boldly palming-kneading his over-sensitized flesh through his jeans.

_Bastard!_

A mild curse. One that never made its way past Ichigo's lips for try as he might to deny it-deny what his body desired he could not-would not-refused to-not this time!

Why fight human nature? Why resist temptation? Why not just let go and touch back-feel-explore-get lost in the hmmm pleasure.

Instinct was guiding Ichigo now-commanding that he hold on to something-the wall didn't seem like a very good option-not nearly solid enough-where as a body on the other hand-a hard solid well muscled masculine body was a much better choice.

Wrapping both his arms and his legs around Kazeshini-pulling the man closer. Ichigo mirrors/mimics the escorts earlier moves-lacking that certain amount of finesse-he's clumsy-a bit unsure but determined.

Ichigo refuses to embarrass him self completely.

A sound of a ding signals that Ichigo and his date (still sounds weird) have made their way into an elevator.

()()

He wouldn't really be considered a tease-a liar-a hypocrite if he ventured closer to Kaze's mouth (yes Kaze-its so much easier to remember and sounds that much sexier hmm yes.) Ichigo has always been a fan of the jaw line-the lips-yes that's it just a move in a little more for a closer inspection.

So what if his tongue slips inside Kaze's mouth a few times-instead of tasting high cheek bones Ichigo tastes the man's upper lip-it is smooth and rough at the same time-still it is not a big deal for it is the bottom lip that is considered more sensitive-more sensual was it not?

If Ichigo didn't have alcohol in his system right now he would surely berate himself for acting like a fool and thinking such nonsensical thoughts. Trying to justify this moment. This night.

Mouth action was mouth action there was no sugar coating it.

'_But why would I want to sugar coat this anyway?'_

Ichigo asks himself this question just a minute later-no less than a minute.

'_I'm not tied down to anyone-and despite those stupid trips down memory lane lately I-_

Ichigo is free to do what ever he wishes to do and right now Kaze's cherry flavored tongue and lips were calling out to him-too delicious to pass up.

There was one thing-one compliment-one nice thing Cirucci ever said about Ichigo during their time together-she had said that she loved his kisses. Not so much the skill but the passion-the amount of passion Ichigo put into kissing her-pleasing her.

Not that Ichigo aimed to please Kaze on this night exactly but he felt that at the very least he owed the escort a little bit of something.

After all the man had earned it right?

()()

(Grimmjow)

What would he do if he saw his rival making out with another person? Passionately making out with another person?

The thought had never really crossed Grimmjow's mind. Sure Kurosaki had that fling or whatever the hell it was with Kuchiki and as annoying, flirtatious, shameless as the girl (now woman) could be he'd never really considered her to be much of a threat.

Especially since it was so blatantly obvious to anyone with half a brain that the orange berry-_his_ orange berry never carried any real interest in the fairer sex.

()()

_FLASH_

"_And that makes it 475 for me and 33 for you-ah its good to be King."_

"_Just because you can shove your tongue down half a dozen throats without feeling anything doesn't make you a King, Grimmjow."_

_Keeping Tally. Keeping Score. Normally Grimmjow didn't give a damn about numbers except for when it came to besting his rival at something-this time around it was a kissing booth competition at a weekend fair._

_Kurosaki's fierce/pouty looking face didn't change facts. He was losing and not happy about it._

"_No reason to be jealous Kurosaki," a leer and a purr "I'd be more than happy to give you a couple of pointers."_

_Predictable scowl. Predictable blush. Followed up by a vicious snarl._

_Grimmjow would never expect anything less out of his strawberry princess._

"_Shut the hell up you bastard! Even if I was a girl I wouldn't want your lips anywhere near mine," a sneer "No telling where they've been."_

_The wide grin that Grimmjow had been wearing all afternoon slipped from his face._

_()()_

It was probably more out of obligation then anything else-when put under pressure Kurosaki would cave-it had always bee one of his major faults.

Then again (Grimmjow's electric blues flashed and narrowed as he moved in to get a closer look) based on Kurosaki's flushed cheeks and harsh panting-the soft moaning-wandering-questing fingers and tongues-freely, eagerly, openly exploring and being explored-

Grimmjow sneered

'_Looks like you've been busy during these past few years eh princess? Mastered all the tricks of the trade? Spreading yourself like good little whore eh?'_

It was jealousy talking. Jealousy and anger. And something Grimmjow refused to say out loud or at the moment even in his own mind. A jumbled mix of emotions clouding his judgment-fogging his brain

Wait a minute though! Something didn't quite add up here.

_This_-(Grimmjow's lip curled in disgust as he continued watching the 'show')

This didn't seem like Kurosaki at all. It was totally and completely out of character.

Grimmjow was quite convinced that his rival was more a bubble baths vs beach houses type, preferred plants and picnics over pillows and porno, fine leather not cheap latex!

Electric blues widened and then narrowed to needle point slits-

Wait a minute! Wait one fuckin' minute here!

Grimmjow moved in even more in order to confirm what he was now suspecting-

There was no mistaking it!

Fists curled-ripping open the skin of his palms.

Grimmjow ignored the blood pooling around his feet and continued to dig his blunt finger-nails into his flesh, snarling, growling and hissing like any pissed off creature would.

That slimy bastard!

How the fuck had Kaze found out about the-_**HIS**_-orange berry?

Even by rummaging through his mail no first name had been given. Snarling and hissing continued Grimmjow didn't blink or wince as his curled fist met the concrete wall-imbedding itself deeply.

The wheels in his head started spinning-things began to click-everything came into focus.

This wasn't a just some _**GD**_ coincidence!

Halibel or Kuchiki or Masaki or that powdered bastard Shiro-anyone one of them had to be behind this. Hell maybe the entire group was behind this-out to make a fucking fool out of him!

Not that it mattered. No it didn't fucking matter because _**NOTHING**_-not even this would stop Grimmjow from claiming what was rightfully his!

TBC

()()

Next time: Yes final-freakingly we get to the coming out party…keep your eyes peeled ladies and gents…its gonna be a looooooooong one!


	15. Chapter 7 INTERMISSION 2 RENJI

**Disclaimer: Bright berries in the rainbow ground…they tell me things…whisper…SLY YOU DO NOT OWN BLEACH, all rights go to KUBO-SENSEI!**

A/N What's this? What's this can it be an update? Is it the loooong-tastic chapter you have promised us…it's not wow SLY you're such a b-itch…how much longer are you going to make us wait? Well ladies/gents …I may not come baring a new chapter but I do come baring a gift….

AU, OOC, First POV, Many pairings, spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc…

Drunken Seahorse Intermission #2

_A Look Into Renji's Present and Past…_

_**It has been brought to my attention that some of you are rooting for me while others would prefer it if I didn't play any part in this story at all. I should just let it go and let Ichigo live happily ever after with Grimmjow right?**_

_**Hell some of you (probably most) are having a difficult time wrapping your brains around my sudden improvement in vocabulary thinking there's no way this guy can be Abarai Renji-it's just not possible. Ain't you ever heard the expression 'It's better to play dumb when you're surrounded by idiots?'**_

_**You haven't? Well then you've come to the right place. From this moment on I don't want you to think of me as Renji the tattooed redhead who wears his heart on his sleeve I want you to think of me as Renji, the informer.**_

_(((KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK))_

"_**Ren-kun you know I don't like it when you bathe without me, come on open the door and we can finish together."**_

_**Ignore my idiotic lover. Szayel's favorite past time is crying out for attention. I think it has something to do with being abandoned at a young age. Guy has some "mumsy" issues-reverting back to childish like behavior ever now and then. Fucking annoying for real sometimes.**_

_**From the way I'm making things sound you're probably asking yourselves 'why choose to be with Szayel?' if you clearly can't stand the guy? Well here's the thing being with Szayel wasn't a choice-at least not in the very beginning. Hell I couldn't stand the pepto-haired bastard.**_

_**At least my shade of red existed on the color wheel-and at least I didn't stick my big nose where it didn't belong-okay okay technically Szayel didn't have a big nose-the only thing big about him is the cobra he keeps in his pants but this isn't a porno so there's no need to get into our sex life. No need to preach it across the globe. Yeah okay so maybe I like it doggy-style best. Maybe I like being his bitch behind the closed doors of our cozy little 2 flat. S'long as the rest of the world thinks I'm the one calling the shots-running the show-it's all gravy.**_

_**Not to say that Szayel doesn't have his occasional lazy day/night where he expects me to do all of the work. Expects me to fuck him good and proper-course there ain't anything proper in what we do but…**_

"_**Ren I'm getting upset and you know what happens when I become upset. Please open the door."**_

_**Szayel isn't the type to bang, pound, break doors. He's the type to lie outside the door like an obedient dog-belly exposed and all. I wasn't ready to come out of the bathroom anytime soon. Probably not for another good half hour or so. Damn burrito bowl!**_

_**Okay too much information-right then right on to what matters-since all this time I've been doing is talk about pointless shit let's focus-zone in on the real reason you're tuning in shall we?**_

()()

FLASH TO THE PAST

_It was during my final year of high school when Szayel (back then I referred to him as Grantz) so in order to stick with the flow I'm gonna call him Grantz while I'm telling you my story…_

_Right so where was I? Grantz came to me with a proposition, one he was oh so sure I couldn't/wouldn't resist. I opted to spend my lunch period on top of the school roof-wasn't in the mood to socialize-wanted peace, quiet, a place to clear my head and gather my thoughts._

_No one really came up to the rooftops except for the manga geeks (who actually believed they had powers) but I paid no mind to them even though their ring leader coincidentally happened to be the twin brother to my best friend-the same best-friend I was crushing hard core on at the time._

_Sis hadn't packed me a lunch that morning so I settled for making myself a good ole PB and J-don't mock me for my love of western style foods!_

_There I was up on the roof minding my own business-munching away on my sandwich when I heard the squeal of a door being opened, followed by a familiar set of clicking heels-I knew who it was even with out turning around-only a spaz like Grantz actually followed the dress code and wore dress shoes instead of sneakers, boots and tennis shoes like normal teenage guys did._

_Not really in the mood for the pepto princes' bullshit I pulled the hood of my jacket up and abandoned my sandwich in favor of crossing my arms-I was bored and browsing through 'Sis' girly magazine one day and I remember skimming through this article about body language-crossing ones arm was an obvious back the fuck up-don't bother me signal! _

_Glaring out at the world I cursed it as a whole-for ruining my damn life. Anyone with a brain could see that I was purposely trying to blockade myself-_

"_I thought I'd find you up here."_

_Grantz had one of those voices that really got under my skin and not in a good way either. It was a combination of pompous, nasally and perverted-he could be talking about something as simple as lawn sprinkles and somehow manage to make it sound like something sexual. Made my stomach churn-again I stress NOT IN A GOOD WAY._

_I stiffened when the bastard welcomed himself into my space and placed a soft hand on my shoulder (how did I know it was soft-well Grantz spent so much damn time dousing himself in lotions and creams it was kinda given that it would be smoother then a chicks creamy thigh)-no other reason-nope no other reason at all _

_(…whistles…) _

"_Hiding will not make Kurosaki fall in love with you, Abarai-kun."_

_When I paid no mind to Grantz outside of flinching he continued on in that annoying nasal-drip tone of his, "I want to help you Abarai-kun. I can not express how much it pains me to see you looking so lost all of the time."_

_My lip curled and I snarled out "Back off Grantz! I'm in no mood for your games today!"_

_It was annoying. He was annoying. Constantly poking-prodding, reminding me on the daily of my failures. _

_Grantz shrunk back a little "Eeek, such a scary expression, such hostility."_

_When I chose not to comment Grantz grinned and invaded my space once more-acting as though he had never shrunk back in the first place-my brow twitched as he brushed his lips against the side of my temple and murmured. "Did I overdue it last night?"_

_An angry blush crept up on to my face. Quickly rising I blew up like hot lava, lashing out at the pervert "SHUT THE HELL UP YOU-I'm not you're damn pony-boy!" When he grinned wider I decked him in the face-my fist colliding with his perfert cheek bone dead on. He stumbled a bit and rubbed the area-it would surely be black and blue in a few hours-not that I gave a shit –and apparently neither did he as he puckered his lips much to my irritation-so I struck him again and this time he hit the ground with a thud._

_Grantz looked up at me not with annoyance or surprise (never surprise since I smacked or punched him on the daily) but with understanding, sympathy and something I refused to acknowledge. It pissed me the fuck off! Grantz didn't allow me to be pissed off for long as he yanked me down on to of him while I was still seething with anger and pressed his mouth against mine. _

_When I refused to open my mouth for entry and struggled to get off him Grantz hooked his fingers under the loops of my studded belt and held me there. Sure I probably could have broken the hold since I had a good 3-4 inches on him in terms of height and outweighed the guy by 15 or 20 pounds-sure I could have-_

_But I chose not to and why? Well as perverted, annoying and overly flamboyant as Grantz was it was kind of hard (make it damn near impossible) to resist the guy entirely-especially when he did those delightful little tricks with his tongue-made me a little light headed-and I would agree to things I normally wouldn't agree to doing in a clear state of mind._

"_Let me help you, Abarai-kun."_

_I glared at Grantz-both for breaking the kiss and also for bringing up my painful one-sided love for Ichigo yet again-_

"_How the hell is this helping?"_

_Grantz smiled-a tender smile-a sickeningly sweet tender smile that really shouldn't exist on the face of a guy-it just wasn't natural._

_His fingers traced the tattoos above my brow, "I love your face. It's so simple yet the expressions you make speak volumes. I do believe you might just be my sweet death, Abarai-kun."_

_Dumbass! What the hell was he-what the fuck-constantly babbling bullshit like like-making me-treating me like some damn chick!_

_The hell I was a chick. His face was ten times more girly then mine!_

"_And it is because of the love I have for you that I will make your greatest wish come true. But before we can do this you will have to accompany somewhere."_

_I wasn't born yesterday. Grantz had another fucking thing coming if he honestly though I would just follow him somewhere blindly-_

_I shifted my position just slightly so I wasn't resting all of my weight on top of him-hey he might be an egotistical pompous asshole but I didn't want to kill him._

_Redheads look horrible in orange you know._

"_No matter how many times I let you blow me it won't change facts and fact is I don't like you."_

_I don't sugarcoat my feelings. Anyone who told you I did is dead wrong._

_There was a flash of a foreign emotion in behind Grantz' designer lenses but it happened much too fast for me to decipher. And then Grantz' hands were down my pants-_

_Scene break_

_()()_

_Because I told you before my story ain't a damn porno!_

_So after a bit of nagging on my end, Grantz relented and announced that I would be accompanying him to Grimmjow's or Jaegerass as I preferred calling the guy back then._

_()()_

"_Here's the plan: Once we're inside you are going to ask Grimmjow to give you some tips on how to be a confident lover. He won't agree right off the bat, we both know this and so in exchange for his help you'll give him these," _

_Grantz paused in order to pull out a stack of photographs. Not just any photographs but photographs of Ichigo. Photographs of Ichigo that I had secretly taken (without his knowledge) and kept hidden underneath the loose floor boards inside my closet._

_I thought-I had been so sure to not tell anyone about them. _

_I grabbed Grantz by the collar of his shirt and snarled in his face (ignoring that he enjoyed my snarls along with everything else I did-fucking weirdo for real)- "Bastard who the hell said you could go rummaging through my closet?"_

_He broke guy code. Teenage guys don't rummage through each others belongings. Leave it to Grantz to break stereotypes-with another angry snarl I snatched the photos from his grasp and hurriedly shoved em' into my back pack._

_Grantz let out a sigh, "I had a feeling you would do this which is why is I always come with a back up plan."_

_At my raised brow he pulled out a wig, heel and mini dress from his own back pack._

"_How is seeing you in a wig and heels gonna convince Jeagerass to teach me the tricks and trades of being a-_

"_A sex god?" Grantz supplied with a bright grin._

_I scowled not liking the term in the least. "Yeah, whatever-why would he-_

_Grantz silenced the rest of my words with his finger tips and pressed our foreheads together "Silly Abarai-kun, you don't really think this is just about you do you?"_

_()()_

_I ignored the way the smoke from Jeargerass' cigarette irritated my eyes and came right out and said what needed to be said. "I need your help."_

_He sneered, not that I expected anything less. "What makes you think I'll teach you my master techniques, eh Abarai?"_

_Jaegerass was too damn cocky for his own good. I'd always thought so. Think it had something to do with his blood-now I'm not trying to come of sounding like some sort of ignorant prejudice punkass but I never really warmed to the idea of foreigners crashing my home territory-least of all a blue haired douche bag with an extra puffed out chest looking for all the world like he really was some kinda ethereal being._

_What the hell did Ichigo see in this guy?_

"_Glaring won't win you brownie points, Abarai. Lose the tude or get the fuck out!" _

_Face blazing hot with anger and irritation I ignored as my lungs filled with second hand smoke and lunged for the half Canadian-unfortunately Jaegerass saw me coming and side stepped and sent me crashing into the dresser._

"_Grimmjow that wasn't necessary." Grantz scolded in a tone that was so damn motherly it was almost painful to my ears. _

_Popping my shoulder back in place I released an angry hiss and tried to lunge for Jeager again but Grantz held me back-so then I turned my angry hiss on him (not that it had any real effect-) big surprise-._

"_Get off!"_

_Naturally he didn't budge. Never did. On top of which no one ever listened to me-still it only encouraged me to struggle hiss and snarl even more. _

"_You need to calm yourself, Abarai-kun."_

"_Let me go damn you! I don't want no damn part of this-whatever the hell this is supposed to be-don't know what I was thinking coming to two freaks like you in the first place but I don't need you. I can win Ichigo on my own." Feeling my confidence level boost when neither had nothing to say I continued on, "I've been told my clumsy aloof like nature can be considered rather endearing-hell if I wanted to I could probably charm the pants right off Ichigo and keep his boxers as a souvenir."_

_I wouldn't really do such anything. Since come on man keeping someone elses undergarments is fucking beyond weird-but that's not the point-point was-_

_Grantz and Jeagerass just looked at me for a minutes-silence-nothing but silence on their ends. _

_I almost felt like doing a victory dance (well if I had been alone I woulda done a victory dance but…)_

_Loud guffaws and soft snickering put my inner celebrations on a halt-_

"_Abarai you poor, stupid, pathetic bastard."_

_What? What'd I say? My declaration wasn't any more ridiculous than the ones these two assholes spewed on a daily basis._

"_You know you don't honestly believe any of that Abarai-kun. If you did then you wouldn't have come to me last year and several times this year-_

_Bastard! Damn Grantz to the firey pits of hell!_

_What happened last year was last year. I only followed him home because well…it didn't fucking matter. Alls' youse got to know is I'm not the kind of guy who just pumps and dumps my seed into some brainless cheerleader on a whim-wasn't ready to be some kinda teenage father so I figured fooling around with Grantz was the lesser of two evils. It was a way to take the edge off-clean the pipes-you get the picture._

"_Riiiight," came Jeagerass' mocking drawl, "Let's move on."_

"_Move on to what?"_

_Stupid question. Seriously stupid question but no sense in dwelling on the past when you can't change it…its like-_

"_Let me put this into words that even a simpleton like you will understand okay, Abarai."_

_It wasn't really a question so I didn't give a response. Just listened as the blue-haired fucker spewed more shit-_

"_You want Kurosaki-everyone knows this! Hell half the fuckers at school wish for the same and yet no one has managed to capture the strawberry."_

_I rubbed the invisible ache in my chest. The wound was still plenty fresh even though more than a year had passed since my confession and yet it didn't make it any easier._

_When Ichigo rejected me and unknowingly battered my school boy heart like a fucking piñata Grantz swept in and picked up the pieces-or more accurately Grantz had been there to cop a feel but same damn difference-no really! _

"_Wanna know why?"_

_I snorted, "Spouse you're gonna tell me?"_

"_Got it in one pineapple boy. You see a guy like Kurosaki needs someone who can put him in his place, someone who will challenge him head on, someone who knows exactly what to say/do in order to get Kurosaki to drop his guards. A guy like Kurosaki is a type B meaning he's naturally looking for a type A-you are a type O-which technically means that you can be with either a type B or A which essentially means all parties will go home happy. But even when type B-that's Kurosaki-goes home happy he'll never be fully satisfied and why is this?_

_Because as a type O you care too much about results-your focus is centered around getting to the grand finale rather than creating a slow buildup ergo you leave type B-Kurosaki-always wanting more. Still confused? Let me break it down for you even more."_

_Jeagerass held up three fingers. "Height, body build, personality-these three things is what it takes-set em' aside and you're left with well __**you**__._

"_What the hell is that supposed to mean?"_

"_It means __**dumbass **__that you're just not cut out to be a top of the line Seme to a natural all-star Uke like Kurosaki-at best you'll be a-_

"_I think that is quite enough, Grimmjow." Grantz cut in just then and offered me a sympathetic smile, "Another round of this and you'll send Abarai-kun to the nearest exit. And that won't help anyone."_

_Jeagerass sneered as if he didn't give two shits any how._

_An unspoken glaring contest was issued between me and Jeager while Grantz got dressed for his upcoming performance._

_()()_

_FLASH FORWARD…_

"_The overall goal here is to ween Abarai of his pansy ass ways. _

_Jeagerass spoke of me as though I wasn't still sitting inside the room with him and Grantz. _

_Asshole._

_I grumbled under my breath but neither Jeager nor Grantz seemed to care not that I wanted em' to care but-_

"_This ain't gradeschool so we'll skip all the holding hands and love notes bullshit and move right into kissing."_

_Kissing? Wait! What?_

"_I will demonstrate how a real kiss is done then you will show us how you kiss if you can manage that much?"_

_You can imagine how I felt at that moment. Grantz had never complained about my kissing skills but maybe that was because he was so drunk with lust over me that my lack of tongue finesse didn't matter. Whatever the reason I wasn't sure how I felt about Grantz kissing Jeager, Jeager kissing Grantz, Jeager kissing me. Could I really stomach it?_

_I couldn't think of any reason as to why Jeagerass would be okay with kissing Grantz. Sure they were friends but as far as I know there was no romantic interest there unless…had it been there and I never noticed it before?_

_I asked myself these questions as I watched the blue-haired jackass grab Grantz by the hair (or wig in this case) and crush their mouths together. There was force put behind the kiss-Jeager was the dominant aggressor in everyway. _

_A moment later the kiss was broken and Grantz wiped a thin strand of saliva from his lips, his amber eyes glittering behind his lenses as he smirked at Jeager and teased, "Hungry today are you?"_

_Jeager lit up another cigarette and sneered at Grantz "In your dreams Polly Pocky." (1)_

_What the hell or who the hell was Polly Pocky? Not that it really mattered but I hated feeling lost in a conversation not that what was taking place between Jeager and Grantz was a conversation per se but…_

"_Stop zoning out and get your ass over here, Abarai!"_

_I ground my teeth together and walked over to the pair of them. Grantz looked at me with …I wasn't sure what the hell and Jeager grinned nastily, "Let's see what you can do."_

_Taking that as my cue I grabbed Jeager much in the same fashion he had grabbed Grantz and kissed him-there wasn't anything particular special in the kiss-hell I didn't even attempt to use tongue-good thing too because-_

"_You don't really kiss like that do you?" A scoff and an eye roll "You're never gonna get a guy like Kurosaki at this rate."_

_I had pride first and above all else and I already let this asshole get away with insulting me several times with in the past half hour I wasn't gonna take it lying down any more "It wasn't that bad!"_

"_It was __**BAD.**__ I actually- shit Szayel what the hell do you see in this guy anyway?"_

_Grantz clucked his tongue in a disapproving manner (it was nice to know that he didn't agree with Jeager on everything) smoothed out his dress, stood up and walked over to me and touched my cheek, "Don't listen to him Abarai-kun you are perfectly fine just the way you are," His thumb brushed my bottom lip "I told you these things take time, stick with me and you'll be an oral master in no time."_

_Jeager snorted but Grantz ignored him and coaxed me into opening my mouth for a kiss. _

_()()_

"_Are you about done? Shit make out on your own damn time or get the fuck out! Simple as that."_

_Grantz wasn't really the growling type so it surprised me a bit when he did-ripping away from my lips and-_

"_What the hell is your problem Grimmjow? Aside from the obvious I mean,:" a sneer "Are you still sulking about last Tuesday? Did you honestly think Kur-_

"_**Shut up Grantz or I'll throw you off the nearest balcony**__."_

_Jeagerass' angry hiss was more threatening then ever and his electric blues narrowed to slits-whatever Grantz was talking about sure seemed to be a sore subject. I couldn't help but grin a little. Maybe this afternoon wouldn't be such a waste after all._

_()()_

"_When you kiss someone you have to think of it like a massage. Warm. Soothing. Sensual. Not like a metal instrument used at a dentist office. Cold. Hard. Rushed. You need to learn how to put force into a kiss without restraining your 'partner' from moving their mouth. And that's another thing kissing properly isn't just about using your tongue you need to use your entire mouth."_

"_Yeah, yeah I get it geez can we just get on with the next-_

_Electric blues flashed dangerously, "Sure if you wanna do things half ass we can move right to the next part. Or you can shut your pie hole, sit down and listen."_

_I flushed an angry red and grumbled something nasty under my breath. Jeagerass just grinned._

_()_

"_So your kissing pretty much sucks-let's see how you are with touching. Once again Szayel and I will demonstrate and then you will follow suit."_

_With a snap of Jeagers' fingers Grantz stood up and sashayed over. I took a seat in a chair next to the window and leaned forward so I wouldn't miss a single moment. Bitching aside I was learning something. _

"_So this is how lesson 2 will play out…we're going to pretend that I'm watching a sports game on TV and my girlfriend, Szayel, wants to get my attention…"_

_I really had no desire to watch Grantz straddle Jeagerass but once it started I couldn't peel my eyes away from the scene if I tried. Figured I could just block out their faces and voices and focus on the way their bodies moved-well at the moment Jeager wasn't doing anything but Grantz…_

_Lightly twisted and curled his fingers in his 'boyfriends' blue locks-I amused myself with a random thought-what if a few chunks of hair came out when Grantz went to unwind his fingers? Hell Jeager put so many damn products in his hair that it was a miracle it hadn't caught fire._

_()_

_Grantz kissed Jeagers' exposed collar bone-leaving little nips and licks along his skin-Jeager (as arrogant as ever) showed no sign of response-bastard didn't even raise a brow-hell he didn't even spare his 'girlfriend' a glimpse-_

_I raised a brow wondering if this was an angle that the dominant male plays or if Jeagerass was simply bored with his own made up scenario? _

_I felt blood rush to my nose as Grantz hiked up his dress and flashed his panties-_

_I didn't really understand how any of this would up my chances of winning Ichigo over but…well on the plus side at least I managed to keep my hormones in check. And my fantasies tightly concealed in the deep recesses of my mind. Not that I fantasized about either asshole well with the exception of that one time when I was Bond and Grantz was my bond girl-but that was only because I had watched back to back marathons with Keigo and-fine you got me. I'll admit it arrogance and flamboyant tendencies aside Grantz could be pretty sexy. I was reminded of this as he continuously rubbed his body up and down Jeagers'-_

_If Grantz had been a chick his panties would be soaked with sweet juices by now but Grantz wasn't a chick he was a guy which in the long run was much better-he ripped of the silky panties and released his jizz right on Jeagers' chest-served the bastard right for walking around half naked even when he had company over._

_I mean who the hell does that anyway?_

_Not that I cared one way or another._

_(whistles)_

_()()_

_At last, at last Jeagerass looked away from the screen and I sat up a little (ignoring the tent in my pants) figured this had to be the moment-I was about to witness something unforgettable._

_Jeagers' turned weird, out of character, his voice now carried a growling purr type of sound-jungle cat would be the best way to describe it or at least that's how I interpreted it. He curled a finger around one of Szayels' fake locks of hair and pulled him forwards and…"Starved for attention are we?" Amusement colored his tone._

_Grantz licked his lips no sign of shame on his face or in his voice, "I had to do something," a pout (a pout that he must have rehearsed countless times because it was damn near flawless) "You were ignoring me and you know how I hate that."_

_()()_

_For a second just for a split second I forgot that it was Grantz I was watching-the wig was still securely on his head but his glasses were askew and slightly fogged-Jeagers' grin was lecherous-predatory-in a flash he had Grantz pinned beneath him-entirely at his mercy-fisting and pumping and rubbing their swollen organs together with his large hands-the bed creaked and aside from being turned on (not entirely against my will) I felt baffled once again questioning how a hot and heavy petting session would make Ichigo fall in love with me. _

_Grantz and Jeager must have sensed my confusion because just abruptly as it had started it stopped._

_Jeager moved off of Grantz. Grantz straightened out his clothes. Grantz moved off the bed and Jeager lit another cigarette _

"_That's how it's done. Think you can top it Abarai?"_

_()()_

_It went on like that for the rest of the afternoon and well into late evening. Let's just say that my teasing and fondling techniques triumphed over my kissing skills and leave it at that._

"_As amusing as this has all been I think its time for you to get your ass home Abarai or better yet Szayel'll do it for you."_

_()()_

_One good thing had come out of this sex-god crash course or whatever I felt confident that when I next saw Ichigo I could squeeze him and fondle him just enough to make him squirm and be hungry for more-it would be lust talking at first-but that would change down the line-my best friend would fall in love with me. I was sure of it._

_()()_

_**Or so I had wished/dreamed of but sadly it did not play out like that.**_

_**And why am I not holding Ichigo in my arms right now? Why are we not sitting in the hammock thinking up baby names for our adopted twin sons and daughters? Why aren't we clinking our wine glasses in celebration of my new job promotion? Planning our summer vacation to the Alps?**_

_**Because the lessons-the practice sessions with Grantz and Jeager go way out of hand.**_

_**Bad things happen when you mix alcohol with raging emotions.**_

_**In my defense it had been Grantz' idea.**_

_**()()**_

_**Resume flash**_

"_There's a difference between what you feel for Kurosaki and what Grimmjow feels for Kurosaki. Grimmjow feels obsession and you feel love. Grimmjow has become so obsessed with Kurosaki that he's taken to flirting and dating anyone with red hair and brown eyes-well not exactly dating since that would require actual real human emotion where he is forced to give a shit-point I'm getting at here is this: I'm not going to bore you with Grimmjow's sex-capades Abarai-kun I'm tell-"_

"_What are you trying to tell me?" I asked Grantz as he led me though the double doors of the supermarket-don't ask me why I agreed to run errands with the guy-I couldn't tell you._

"_Kurosaki, the poor love sick sap actually feels something for Grimmjow."_

"_I really don't need to hear this Gra-_

"_Shh Abarai-kun just listen."_

_I let out a sigh and grabbed one of the sample cups the market was offering. It didn't smell or look very appetizing but sometimes eating curbed my anger._

_Grantz picked up a basket and filled it half way with boxes of-well I wasn't really sure what it was but it looked a little like nutrigrain bars and continued on with, "Kurosaki actually thinks Grimmjow would solely devote his time to him and only him. He is quite obviously delusional and so you and I are going to show him the truth."_

_We reached the end of the isle (not that we spent much time in the first isle to begin with) and Grantz turned to me, cereal box in hand, "Have you tried these?"_

"_Zanny puffs? I've never even heard of that?" He put the puffs back on the shelf and we continued on to the next isle-_

"_It won't be easy since Kurosaki is stubborn but-_

"_How exactly are we going to show Ichigo that Jeagerass is just that, an ass?" _

_Grantz picked up a bag of cherries examined it and then placed it inside the basket as he answered, "There will be a huge party. Not just any party but a party filled with redheads-redheads stationed in every nook and cranny of the house. Some of these redheads have played with Grimmjow while others have never even met him. _

_None of that matters. The only thing that matters is-"_

_I didn't really understand what inviting a bunch of redheads to some party was supposed to accomplish. "What does any of this have to do with me or Ichigo for that matter?"_

_Amber eyes glittered, "In the very center of redhead paradise will be you Abarai-kun."_

_Why didn't I like where this was heading._

"_The time has come for you to put all your lessons to good use. The time has come for you to give Grimmjow top of the line service. I will be hidden in the next room over with a camera. From the angle I shoot the video it will look like you are being forced into blowing him rather than performing the act willingly. Minutes before things really shift into high gear and you have Grimmjow right where you want him-you will slip your hands inside the pocket of your pants and dial Kurosaki's number. Text him to come and pick you up because you've obviously had too much to drink and have no way of getting home. _

"_Only one problem with that, I don't drink."_

"_Oh but you will. Trust me you'll want to drink. Everyone will."_

"_I-_

"_Kurosaki, being the kind of guy he is, will rush to your aid no questions asked. The instant he catches Grimmjow raping your m-_

"_Do you have to make it sound so obscene?"_

_Grantz smirked and patted my head like I was some pathetic puppy. _

"_The rest will all play out accordingly."_

"_Wait! Just stop okay? I-I won't-I'm not going to-Ichigo and gah-no-just no-my answer is NO!"_

"_Abarai-kun you really s-_

"_NO! The way you're making this scenario sound I-damn it how many times do I have to say it? I'm not a damn woman! I don't need nobody rescuing me-and what the hell are you staring at HUH? You never seen two guys shop together before-stupid judgmental senile decre-_

_No I wasn't having some type of insane breakdown, this elderly couple had passed us mid rant and threw me the filthiest look-_

"_Abarai-kun there is no need for you to cause a scene."_

_Pfft! Damn Grantz being all casual and unaffected. Like what the fuck? It didn't even faze him? Did anything faze this asshole?"_

"_I'm not a b-_

"_You really must stop getting so hung up on titles and labels. Just because Kurosaki was born to protect doesn't mean-_

_I stuck my fingers in my ears and started singing nonsense at an obnoxious volume-hoping to shut Grantz up 'We all come together-we know what to do-we all come t-_

"_Abarai-kun this isn't open for discussion."_

_It didn't work._

_Damn. Damn. DAMN IT ALL!_

_We headed for the dairy isle and I was 3 seconds away from grabbing a milk carton and launching it at Grantz' head!_

"_Why the hell am I still here with __**you **__anyway? I should be with __my__ best friend at __his__ sisters championship soccer game. I should be planning a road trip in celebration of making it through sen-_

_Grantz dropped the low fat lemon yogurt and a dark shadow fell over his eyes as he turned to me, "Abarai-kun road trips and soccer games are not the answer to winning Kurosaki over. If you're going to be stubborn and fight me on this I'll be forced to something very unpleasant," his voice dropped an octave or two lower-a sudden chill came over me and it was not because I was standing right next to the ice cream._

"_What do you mean?" I ignored the slight tremble in my own voice and pressed him to elaborate._

"_It's quite simple Abarai-kun," Grantz voice turned soft, sweet, pleasant, non-threatening, "You either go along with my plan or I'll whip out my shiny pink 'mastadon' and rip Kurosaki's asshole wide open in front of the entire graduating class."_

_Call me an asshole. A shitty friend. But just for a moment I imagined what would happen if Ichigo were forced into such a situation-his ripened and tight firm ass raised high in the air-his back would spasm uncontrollably as he was brutally assaulted from behind-under the hot beaming lights-hundreds of gazes locked on him-blood sweat and cum would drip from his virgin hole and down his thighs and-well shit it was pretty damn hot to think about but my morals, my loyalty to Ichigo would not permit me to do such a thing._

_I shook my head and banished the shameful thoughts. Then turned to Grantz and lowered my head in defeat (much to his delight-asshole)_

"_Fine if it will spare Ichigo from humiliation and suffering I'll do it."_

_()()_

_But as my luck would have it things did not work out as smoothly as Grantz said they would._

_()()_

_**The time for drama has passed. I fucked up. Jeagerass fucked up. Ichigo hadn't spoken to either one of us in years but with this big fairy blow out right around the corner-things are gonna change.**_

_**You can count on it!**_

_**()()()**_


	16. Chapter EIGHT

**Disclaimer: WILL NEVER BE KUBO-SENSEI-NEVER EVER!**

**ANE-RAINBOW IF THIS DOESN'T BRING YOU BACK I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL!**

**A/N At the end of this those of you reading will be saying…did you really have to go there SLY? And I'll respond…yes, yes I did. GRINS.**

AU, OOC, spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-ons, ETC

Pairings a many, Pairings a plenty…

DRUNKEN SEAHORSE

CHAPTER 8

(Grimmjow)

_Our eyes meet and they each seem to say_

_"In the end, I will win"_

_And you go forth with the same unexpected speed_

_How far do you need to run to be satisfied?_

_Your pride flares and you glare at me in anger_

_With our hearts' blood pumping through our veins_

_In this world of ice I'll show you our fire_

_This dream is now set into certain stone_

_Because I know you more than anyone, my eternal rival_

_So let's go forth into tomorrow_

_I'm thrilled with a touch of ecstasy_

_Finally a game I can play seriously_

_It's not just the same puzzle again and again_

_We're always outdoing ourselves_

_In so much black and white we each have to win_

_With our hearts raging in an unending battle_

_In this world of ice I'll show you our path and destination_

_This dream is now set as inevitable goal_

_Because I watch you more than anyone, my destined rival_

_So let's go forth into the future_

_In a moment brilliance becomes energy_

_With our hearts finally wearing out in this beautiful battle_

_In this world of ice I'll show you our fire_

_This dream is now set into certain stone_

_Because I know you more than anyone, my eternal rival_

_So let's go forth into tomorrow (1)_

()()

Aggression should be put to use in a positive way. This meant restraining himself from breaking down the door, beating the shit out of Kazeshini and dragging Kurosaki out by his hair.

It meant that any thoughts of burying Kaze six feet under would have to wait. Meant sexually assaulting his former rival would have to wait only hopefully by the time that rolled around it wouldn't be considered assault but playful wrestling.

Grimmjow hadn't gone through years of therapy just so he could fuck it up now. Losing control would mean he was letting everyone else win and that was unacceptable.

So time to change course. Head home. Construct a new plan.

And this time Grimmjow was going to do so with out the meddling or assistance of someone else (or make that the meddling of someone from Kurosaki's inner circle) he was through playing with that bunch.

Not that it had ever been his choice in the first place.

()()

(Ichigo)

Once the door was shut and locked there was no turning back but Ichigo didn't want to turn back. In fact that King size bed in the center of the suite looked like the perfect place to fall.

Kazeshini was making it rather difficult though-he seemed to have something else in mind and since Ichgo still had his legs wrapped around the taller males' waist, wasn't sober enough to walk on his own he'd just have to continue going along with it. And pray, hope that Kazeshini wouldn't force him into doing something he wasn't ready to do.

His prayers were answered as Kazeshini set him on his feet.

"Forced sex is overrated besides you're too innocent to properly appreciate my talents so instead we're going to paint each others' toe-nails, pig out on finger foods and watch porn."

Even with these words Kazeshini didn't move away from Ichigo right away-his hands were still in the process of caressing the berry.

Ichigo found it difficult to issue a proper response. His mind was spinning wildly as images of the past couple of hours flashed and then shifted into more memories from his past…

()()

FLASHBACK

_Ichigo just didn't have it in him to say no when someone asked him for a favor. Although at times he wished he wasn't such a nice guy-wished he hadn't agreed with out even asking what said favor was. _

_This was one of those times….earlier that same day when Nel had asked him to cover her shift at the dry cleaners because a family crisis had suddenly come up Ichigo agreed-foolishly thought 'How bad it could it be?'_

_Well it was bad. _

_Not only was the owner of the shop a grouchy old hag her customers were either rude and snobbish with ridiculous requests or sleazy and perverse. _

_Contrary to popular opinion Ichigo did not like to attract unnecessary attention. He just wanted to label what needed labeling-clean with needed cleaning and enjoy his 15 minute break in peace-with his chocolate mint candy bar and his novel as his only company._

_Wish in one pot and crap in another._

_Ichigo let out a groan of frustration as the little bell above the door chimed and a familiar head of blue hair came into his line of vision._

_Really? Really!_

_There were like 6 or 7 other dry cleaners in Karakura Town and 3 in the next town over why the hell did his rival have come here?_

_Ichigo could hide in the back but that would be childish and cowardly._

_Not to mention if he disappeared now he wouldn't be able to get a good read off Grimmjow's latest piece of ass-normally Ichigo wouldn't refer to a girl in such a crude manner but he couldn't help it-not when the dumb twit clung to his rival like a fucking leech._

_Why did Ichigo care?_

_Well he didn't. Not really. He just wished to understand his rival a little better. _

_Figured if he could understand why Grimmjow did the things that he did (like hook up with floosies) then maybe, just maybe he would be able to turn their rivalry into some type of friendship._

_Yes this all made sense in Ichigo's mind._

_Well that and maybe when he became Grimmjow's friend he could introduce the blue-haired teen to a nice well-mannered girl who didn't choose to spend every waking moment looking at her reflection in the mirror._

_Maybe if and when (because Ichigo did prefer to think positively instead of negatively) he and Grimmjow became friends the physical attraction he felt towards the other boy would cease and desist._

_Lust long gone and forgotten and never to resurface again. How grand that would be._

_Who knows maybe his rival/soon to be friend would even agree to double dating-even though Ichigo didn't have a clue who he would ask out. None of the girls at school really interested him in any way-ah well no point in thinking about it now._

_One step at a time._

_The first was greeting Grimmjow with a smile and a cheery and enthusiastic "Afternoon, how are you today?"_

_Ichigo felt his beaming smile slip a little when Grimmjow just narrowed his electric blues and then looked at him as though he had grown a tail overnight._

_Whispering something in his 'girlfriends' ear-sending the wench into a fit of giggles-the duo no doubt mocking and insulting Ichigo._

_Ichigo bit the inside of his cheek ignoring the slight pang in his chest and forced down the bile that was threatening to come up and continued on as though nothing had happened-more importantly treating the blue-haired teen like any other customer. "So what do you want?"_

_Not exactly the proper way to er…handle a customer but it would do. _

_Grimmjow didn't seem to care one way or another-so entranced in his 'minx on morphine' and all-practically dry-humping the dumb broad right inside the shop._

_To make him self feel a little bit better about this current situation Ichigo picked up the phone (intended/strictly meant for business or emergencies-not that the berry gave two shits about that at the moment-) and dialed a number._

_If Grimmjow was going to be a shameless man whore then Ichigo was going to play the same game…well sort of …okay not really...not even close but…oh whatever making the call was better than not doing anything._

_He'd have to be loud-uncensored-possibly crude-luckily the one he was calling (Shiro) wasn't fazed by anything and so the bino wouldn't even raise a brow when he listened to the message Ichigo was leaving on his voice mail later on that day._

_Actually knowing Shiro he'd probably be amused by the entire thing._

_If Ichigo was going to pull this off then he would have to abandon who he was-otherwise it wouldn't work-clearing his throat Ichigo deepened his voice from its usual raspy tenor and…_

"_**Hey baby its me. Can't wait for tonight. Looking forward to seeing you in that tiny little black thong I picked out for your birthday. Are you getting yourself all nice and wet for me? I bet you are you dirty girl-Bet you're listening to this message right now-your tight little body all covered in soap suds as you run your razor over those sexy ass legs that I love so much-the water stings just a bit-just the way you like it right baby? **_

_**Hearing the sound of my voice is turning you on-driving you wild-go ahead and tease your breasts for me-pinch those sweet cherry nubs just like I do to you when we're together-I love your titties-they remind me of gum drops-my mama always said I had an oral fixation as a child-but your so much better than my mama baby-oooh and I bet right now your breathing harshly-gasping-crying out-you drop the razor-luckily you're a smart girl and drop it outside of the tub and don't cut yourself. If you did cut yourself I'd be there to lick every last drop of crimson off your-**_

_Ichigo could feel his face becoming flushed with each word that spilled past his lips-it wasn't-his little attempt at one upping his rival was having the opposite effect because he was being effected-not like he did it on purpose. _

_Honestly he had just been spilling out some crap that he'd heard Keigo and some of the others guys say at summer camp a few years ago-the dumbasses probably didn't even know what half the damn words meant but Ichigo did and it was what came to mind when he started this but…but _

_He was not a chick. Would never be a chick. Only he kind of wanted to be the chick listening on the other end just then-Not an actual chick by physical means but he wanted someone to talk dirty to him. Someone to tease him through the phone. _

_Was that weird? Sure it was? But then again he'd always been weird-weirder yet even though he was saying the words-in Ichigo's mind it was someone else-not just anyone but…_

"_Hate to interrupt your little __**phone **__session Kurosaki but the last time I checked you were sitting behind that desk and the only kind of service that should be on your mind is customer __**service**__," his rival practically spat the words out like poison, "SO if you'd be so kind as to get my jacket I'd __**greatly**__ appreciate it."_

_When had Grimmjow stopped pawing his 'bitch in heels?'_

_When had said bitch left? Why should Ichigo care?_

_Grimmjow was giving him his full attention now (which is what Ichigo had wanted all along so-) granted he was being a jackass but Ichigo could ignore or that._

_Chose to ignore his rivals' less than friendly tone and instead focus his attention on how damn good Grimmjow looked in silky white button down-even with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows-as per his usual style-could focus his attention on how bright blue locks were free from gel and mousse products today-drown a little bit in the new scent coming off the older teen in waves._

_Ichigo furrowed his brows. Was Grimmjow going to some fancy-pants gala or something? He didn't seem like the type-most likely he'd been forced into it._

"_Earth to Kurosaki!"_

_Huh? Oh yeah Grimmjow wanted his jacket. It was the whole reason for his rival coming to the cleaners today. Ichigo could ask for the slip, he could give Grimmjow exactly what he wanted or he could be difficult._

_A slight smirk on his lips, "Last time I checked leather jackets weren't considered formal attire. If I hand your jacket to you you'd only be attracting unwanted attention and sticking out at the party like a sore thumb."_

"_Oh is that so?"_

_In the blink of an eye Grimmmjow was in Ichigo's personal space-damn near nose to nose and the berry knew the other teen was doing it on purpose which is why he did not react-refused to jump and show any sign of nervousness. He was stronger than that._

_Ichigo's smirk widened, "Yes."_

_A hand slammed on top of the desk and Grimmjow's tone turned dark-threatening-a damn near hiss as he grabbed Ichigo by the hood of his sweater and…_

"_This isn't a game Kurosaki. Go and fetch my damn jacket or I'll climb over that desk and I'll make you do it," he trailed off and a grin (far from friendly) stretched over his lips, "And trust me when I say you won't like it."_

_Determined not to be intimidated Ichigo narrowed his cinnamon and coffee brown eyes and detached his rivals' fingers from his hood and shoved Grimmjow_

_And then show down began-for all of two minutes-_

_The chiming of the little bell above the door canceled any thoughts of bloody war-probably for the best too._

_A mother entered with her two twin daughters. It wasn't rocket science-any one with half a brain knew to be on their best behavior when in the presence of the fairer sex._

"_Look Kurosaki we don't have to turn this into some sort of contest of whose the better, tougher man. Just take the ticket, get my jacket and I'll be on my way."_

_Ichigo let out a sigh and accepted the ticket-ignoring how Grimmjow unnecessarily touched the inside of his palm during the pass and went into the back to retrieve the jacket._

_()()_

"Why don't you get washed up and I'll order room service?"

Ichigo blinked. And then nodded truthfully not really caring one way or another about much of anything-but a bath or a shower would be a good way to clear his head, "Yeah, sure sounds good."

()()

And with the exception of ruffling his damp orange locks, planting kisses on his neck, forehead and cheeks Kazeshini stayed true to his word and didn't put his hands or lips anywhere on Ichigo for the rest of the night.

All and all, thought Ichigo, it was a lot like a sleep-over-well baring the cucumber eye masks and pillow fights that is. But then again he and Kaze were not chicks.

()()

(Grimmjow)

No one should show up to a party empty handed. That's just in bad taste.

There was going to be 300 hundred guests-hell possibly more than 300 hundred guests at the Drunken Seahorse tomorrow night. And although Kurosaki had never had a problem spotting him in a large crowd in the past, Grimmjow did not want to take any chances.

He wanted his strawberry princess' attention focused entirely on him. Would not settle for less.

The afternoon when he went to the café with Masaki…after a series of lectures and what not the woman had told Grimmjow a little bit about what to expect a the party…

_**()()**_

_**FLASHBACK**_

"_**We've hired several entertainers/performers for the party ranging from professionals to Ichigo's child hood friends and school mates. As his rival and potential love interest have you given any thought as to what you might like to do for my son?"**_

_**Grimmjow wasn't sure how to respond to Masaki's question. But he couldn't avoid it entirely-not a chance he could ignore the 'hawk's eye' –**_

"_**What do you mean by do exactly?"**_

_**Masaki smirked into her golden teacup "Surely you must have some sort of special talent. I mean you don't honestly think you can win Ichigo's heart based on your bad boy charm and looks alone, hmm?"**_

"…"

"_**Surely there must be some sort of talent you possess isn't there?"**_

_**Sure Grimmjow had "talents". He just didn't think they would be appropriate to discuss or joke about with Kurosaki's mother.**_

"_**If you mean like performing magic tricks or singing some song-**_

"_**Singing, yes let's run with that for a moment." The woman rested her flawless chin in the palm of her hand and studied him from across the table, "Everyone is a fan of music and I'm sure with a bit of practice you could-**_

_**Not good. Not good. Grimmjow had to cut Masaki off right there.**_

"_**Uh no offense Masaki-san but that ain't gonna happen"**_

_**Not a chance in hell. He'd already been forced/conned into making an ass of himself back in highschool-he'd be damned if he let it happen again.**_

_**Masaki studied Grimmjow for a minute. Seemed to be considering something-there was a certain twinkle in her eye- what ever was going on in the woman's mind-she did not share but instead, "Don't forget we are shutting the doors at seven-thirty. If you aren't inside well then," a light smirk, "I guess you won't be seeing Ichigo."**_

_**The smirk was fitting and Grimmjow found that he was slowly starting to like this woman.**_

_**He flashed her a charming smile "You have nothing to worry about Masaki-san I wouldn't miss it even if my own mother crawled up from out of her grave and knocked on my front door."**_

_**And that was saying something because even after all the time that had passed Grimmjow felt a deep connection to his deceased mother-had not taken her death lightly.**_

_**Masaki's eyes widened just the slightest bit, the smirk leaving her face completely.**_

_**Grimmjow did not want this woman feeling sorry for him. Didn't want anyone pitying him. "It's old news no need to get so," he trailed off and shifted uncomfortably in his seat when the woman steadied his hands with hers- "Listen Masaki its really no big deal-I'm just telling you that Kuro-Ichigo means something to me. That's all."**_

_**She released his hands and smiled at him. A true genuine smile, "Whether she is seated right next to you or is beneath many layers of soil remember this: A mother's love for her son is never extinguished."**_

_**Grimmjow could only take that as a sign that he was winning the woman's trust-a first step-and a grand one at that.**_

"_**You will of course make your feelings known to my son with both actions and words, yes?"**_

_**Like he really had much of a choice in the matter. **_

"_**Are you saying I should write him some kind of love letter or something?"**_

_**The twinkle returned to her eyes, "Only you can answer that, Grimmjow."**_

_**()()**_

Grimmjow fully intended to stand by what he had told Masaki. He would not be singing or dancing and making a complete ass of himself on stage.

But just because performing wasn't in the cards that didn't mean he wouldn't plan a little something in celebration of Kurosaki finally coming out of the damn closet!

Nothing over the top or extravagant but something unexpected.

As the wheels turned in Grimmjow's head the disgust, irritation he felt towards his former rival and the bastard Kaze who assaulted Kurosaki in the hallway of the hotel simmered down.

Move forward. More important things to do. Take care of.

And he was going to start by contacting a certain estranged half brother that was considered a King when it came to 'SUPRISES.'

Grimmjow made it a rule to never throw away anything that might be of use to him at some point in time.

Fishing around inside the second shelf on his nightstand for a slip of paper-baring said half-brothers' name and number on the front-the words-

'_**If there should ever come a time when you are in need of some assistance. Ore-sama will be there. Be awed by my most gracious offer' ~A.K~ (2)**_

Grimmjow had only met Atobe a hand full of times so he knew it was a bit presumptuous of him to contact the guy and ask for a favor on such short notice but…well the note read 'anytime" so…

()()

After smoking a half a pack of cigarettes, Grimmjow made the call, Atobe agreed and the countdown to tomorrow had officially begun.

()()

(Ichigo)

The following morning…

**FRIIIIIIIIDAAAAAAAAY…..**

Ichigo awakes and finds Kazeshini's legs and arms are draped around him-he's going to ignore the obvious bulge pressing into him from behind, knock the snoring man to the side and then head for the bathroom.

()()

Looking at his reflection in the mirror Ichigo realizes this is it. Friday. By the time nightfall rolls around life as he knew it could possibly be very, very different.

Nervous? Sure but also excited. Yes Ichigo was excited about seeing Grimmjow after all the time that had passed.

In a way Ichigo had been trying to avoid any and all thoughts about his coming out party but that time has now passed.

It is at this moment when Ichigo realizes that he doesn't have anything to wear. He can't just show up to a life altering bash in a standard T-shirt and jeans-hell not even a dress shirt and simple slacks will cut it.

No he needed to wow the pants off of everyone-especially Grimmjow.

And why?

Why the hell not!

()()

(Grimmjow)

"Well, well look who decided to bring his ass into work this morning." –the bout time was left unsaid but Grimmjow already knew. Thing was he didn't give a shit.

He sneered a Barragan-not the least bit intimidated by the tiered ass bastard-man thought he was something special as he stood in the doorway in a tacky yellow and purple striped suit-giving him the appearance of a dried up and diseased prune left on the window-sill.

Huffing and puffing-tobacco spit flying out of his mouth as he coughed like a person who had a severe case of Bronchitis. Disgusting.

Grimmjow was reminded of why he had skipped out on work for the past two weeks. Wished the old man would just hurry the hell up and kick the damn bucket already so his niece, Annaliyn could step in and take over.

Not that Grimmjow had ever actually seen the little lady-hell none of the guys at Death King's Auto had seen her. Figured it was probably some bullshit tall-tale Barragan spun in order to gain sympathy.

"Listen here you crusted up worthless turd I'm the best thing you got going 'round here-without me this dump would crumble down to nothing." –so get off my ass-went with out saying.

Grimmjow shoved passed his boss and set off towards the locker room in order to change out of his street clothes.

()()

Working on cars was something that had come naturally to Grimmjow. He figured his old man must have passed it down to him-the only good thing the worthless bastard ever did.

Getting oil on his face and hands was truly the only downside to working on cars. Although he wasn't all that fond of the scent of gasoline either. But back to the black oil-it was an absolute bitch-damn near impossible to remove-staining his fingers and clothes/

Heh. If Kurosaki could hear him now-the strawberry princess would no doubt respond with something along the lines of 'Yeah but blood stains are nearly impossible to remove and yet that doesn't seem to faze you in the least.'

Sometimes when it was quiet (well as quiet as an autoshop could be anyway) Grimmjow would shut his eyes and imagine that his strawberry princess was right next to him-yes even in a cramped space like the underbody of a car with a 300 ton weight.

Not that they would be able to do much-then again rumor had it Kurosaki was pretty flexible so…

The sound of footsteps reached Grimmjow's ears almost instantly crushing out visions of his rival doing non-kosher things.

The footsteps drew nearer and nearer before stopping. Grimmjow slid out from under the car, figuring it was another moronic customer who didn't know a carburetor from a fuse box.

Reached into the pocket of his dark grey coveralls, pulled out a relatively clean cloth and wiped his hands. Then stood up to face a dark haired man with equally deep dark eyes. Dressed in a jacket that was heavily decorated with pins and badges.

Grimmjow's eyes widened ever the slightest in recognition. This was no moronic customer. No he knew who this was-bastard hadn't changed a bit. Still had an obsession with all things military.

No doubt still carrying around an unlicensed gun in the glove compartment of his Mercedes.

"Mustang, to what do I owe this unexpected visit? My birthday's not for another month you know."

Mustang smirked, "Still going around with over coiffed and gelled hair I see. No wonder you're in a place like this instead of working along side the old man."

Grimmjow's brow twitched the idea of working with his grandfather did not appeal to him in the least. Deciding to draw the unwanted attention away from himself he turned the tables "Noticed your different set of wheels, Hawk finally grab you by the balls?"

Dark eyes glittered, "Not exactly."

The stare down. Followed by shaking of hands and uber manly hugging.

()()

FLASH

_Grimmjow had met Mustang shortly after senior year outside of a court house. He could tell right away that the dark-haired teen wasn't from Karakura Town with round eyes and a square jaw. Been awhile since Grimmjow last saw anyone interesting. Maybe it was the way the kid was resting of the back of his right heel against the side of the building. Maybe it was the messenger back slung over a meaty shoulder or perhaps it was the way held his cigarette. (3)_

_Whatever the reason Grimmjow walked over to strike up a conversation. _

_Mustang was rather guarded and tight lipped at first-didn't do much more then a nod or 'hn'… -but by the time Grimmjow stopped rambling about pointless bullshit and talked about what was really on his mind…he had Mustang's full attention._

"_Judicial system my ass! Instead of catching and fining the real crooks those hog bastards rather sit around stuffing their faces with chicken pot pies and greasy donuts-waste their time decorating my car with stupid little pink slips and ugly yellow boots. And for what? Forgetting to signal? Parking next to a fire hydrant? Going 15 miles over the speed limit? Bullshit system-bullshit, all of it bullshit."_

"_You know its not you their targeting," Mustang began as he shifted from one foot to another, now resting his left heel against the building, "They don't give a shit about you-it's the gas guzzler you're oh so proud of-hotter the rocket-higher the bill. But since you seem like a pretty decent guy I'm gonna help you out."_

_Mustang reached into one of the many pockets of his jacket and pulled out a card. Grimmjow raised a brow, "What am I supposed to do with this?"_

"_Next time the cops try and give you trouble, call the number on this card, ask for Hughes, he's…well he'll help you out."_

_And from that moment on it was just…_

_Well Grimmjow wouldn't so far as to call his connection with Mustang a bromance but…they did become pretty close that summer._

_Wound up having a lot in common._

_Like settling or hooking up with someone else because they couldn't have the one they really wanted._

_Mustang liked to torture himself by staying with a girlfriend of three years because the real blond he had set his sights on was underage-on top of which the Elric kid wanted nothing to do with him. At first Grimmjow thought Mustang was probably exaggerating but then he tagged along on one of Mustang's little 'afternoon stalking sessions' one day and…_

_While the Elric boy was running his deliveries Mustang would trail the runt in his car-looking like every bit the creeper the boy accused him of being-especially when he rolled down the window and purred out, "I couldn't help but notice you were struggling a bit with all of those boxes, how 'bout a ride."_

"_Who the hell are you calling so short that he can't reach the pedals __**HUH?"**_

_Mustang chuckled, "Such fire for a little runt, how old are you again?"_

_Red faced with anger, embarrassment, his long golden braid whipping violently over a slim shoulder, Elric shouted out a string of obscenities and made angry hand gestures at the same time he was trying to steer his bicycle and not veer off and crash into a tree or a mail box or a cat. (4)_

"_Fucking bastard colonel, stop following me!"_

"_Colonel, heh, I like it."_

_Grimmjow snorted and flicked a cigarette ash out the window. "You would. You freaking masochist."_

_()()_

"So what brings you here anyway? Hawk threaten to dump you and run off with some rich Irish bloke? Need a shoulder to cry on?"

Mustang snorted, "In your dreams. No actually the left rear tire is a little flat, was in the area figured you could take a look at it."

Grimmjow opened up his mouth to say something in response but was drowned out by an obnoxious honking sound-sounded like the dumbass was elbowing the horn-for a good 5 minutes and then…

"Hurry it up already! We don't have all damn day-Winry expected us to meet her at 3' o clock and instead of asking the mechanic if he can put some air in the tire you're too busy playing around with him-fucking bastard-don't know why I put up with you."

That voice there was no mistaking that voice. Grimmjow turned around and confirmed what his ears were already telling-same golden locks-same angry scowl-same impatient gripe-although maybe an octave or two lower in pitch.

The Elric kid. Although not so much of a kid any more. Obviously legal or he wouldn't have been hiding in Mustang's back seat-hmm maybe he hadn't been hiding but sleeping. Grimmjow shrugged not really giving a damn either way.

He was amused. And maybe a tad bit jealous-course he wasn't going to let Mustang know it.

"Heh, so he finally gave into your charm, eh?"

Elric made angry hand gestures and glared at the two of them. Mustang only grinned like a fool-yeah a fool in love. "What can I say? It's a gift."

"Oi, oi who are you calling so short that he can't see over the steering wheel!"

The Elric shrimp was a little weird. Grimmjow had always thought so.

"Never did quite get over his stature complex I see."

Mustang nodded, "Edward's always been a bit sensitive about his height-got a brother-kid is nearly 6 feet tall and everyone else in his family is tall-guessed it must have skipped him-not that it matters. He's perfect just the way he is."

Gods Mustang sounded like such a dork. Even when Grimmjow had Kurosaki right where he wanted him-he vowed to not come off sounding like such a sap happy idiot.

()()

(Ichigo)

Ichigo returned home to find it empty-where had everyone gone he did not know but he could guess.

The sound of footsteps could be heard.

Correction the house wasn't entirely empty.

()()

He could hear sounds coming from behind Kon's bedroom door. Not exactly who he wanted to see but maybe his moronic brother could tell him the whereabouts of everyone else. He knocked because not only was it the right thing to do but Ichigo rather not catch his twin with his pants down-once had been bad enough.

"Kon can I come in?"

"Just a minute," came Kon's ear-grating grumble.

Ichigo tapped his foot impatiently ignoring how his stomach started to growl with hunger. He really should have taken Kaze up on his offer to share some breakfast together but Ichigo felt if he agreed it would give Kaze the wrong idea and…he had enough to deal with and really didn't fancy any more drama then necessary.

Kaze had been a cool guy-pretty relaxed and down to earth for the most part. Ichigo wouldn't mind seeing him again but…

The knob turned and Kon opened the door looking a little flushed in the face and slightly out of breath. He had a reddish-blond 5' o clock shadow on his face even though it hadn't even reached noon. Wearing nothing but white tube socks, a stained t-shirt and sea-green colored boxer shorts.

"Did you just wake up?"

Wouldn't be the first time Kon went to bed with the lights on and tv blaring.

Kon's eyes darted around the room, the apricot-blond looking everywhere but at Ichigo. "N-no why would Kon-sama sleep the day away when his lovely ladies are anxiously awaiting to be loved and entertained? Haha you are such an idiot Ichigo."

Hmm…almost convincing but not quite.

Ichigo stepped into the room and scanned the area and then narrowed his eyes at his brother, "What are you hiding Kon? And don't bother to try and lie because I can always tell."

Kon raked his hands through his floppy mop of hair and started to close the door as he hurried to answer Ichigo and push him out of the room, "Never mind that. Everyone is at the Drunken Seahorse so go harass them. I'll see you later."

**(SLAM)**

Ichigo glared at the closed door.

**()()**

A short while later…

(PHONE CONVERSATION)

(((

"**Ichi, knew ya'd call. So what can I do for you?"**

**)))**

As always Shiro sounded alive, alert and all too happy to hear from him. Though Ichigo was a bit surprised that his cousin was still at home-figured Shiro and Ulquiorra would be out and about enjoying the sunshine and picking up a new boy to play with.

"Well…it dawned on me that I have nothing to wear to the party tonight so I was kind of hoping for a few pointers but if you're b-

"**Say no more Ichi, Quiorra just jumped in the shower but I'm out here on deck enjoying an iced latte and some muffins so why don't ya just hop on over and we'll discuss ya outfit.**

"Before I do please just promise me one thing."

He could hear the grin in Shiro's voice. Wasn't exactly convincing when his cousin said**, "Anythin' for you Ichi."**

"I'm serious Shiro nothing over the top or ridiculously flamboyant."

"**Not to worry Queen, heels are only meant for special occasion. We're not lookin' ta doll ya up all nice and pretty. Our goal or should I say MY goal is to enhance what ya already are."**

What he already is? What the hell is that supposed to mean.

"**Some glitter around the eyes, a few extensions hmmm its too hot for leather not to mention not 'xactly original- ya should definitely wear a color that will being out ya eyes!"**

"What about blue?"

**He could hear Shiro snickering.**

"**Nah unh half ya damn wardrobe is blue and I know why but just no Ichi. Ya need soemthin' new and different and exciting. How do ya feel 'bout silver or platinum?"**

Ichigo thought about it for a minute. "It's alright I guess."

"**Nah, alright ain't gonnna cut it Ichi. Maybe we should put ya in red for some reason I could never wrap my brain 'round ya've always pulled that color off quite well."**

Red? It was a nice color but Ichigo didn't think it was the right choice. "What about stripes or-

"**Stripes?" He could almost hear the sneer in Shiro's tone, "Stripes don't scream "FUCK ME" Ichi-ya need somethin' else-how ya feel 'bout Velcro?"**

**The conversation continued on this way for the next 20 minutes or so. Shiro throwing out ideas and Ichigo shooting them down.**

"**Listen Ichi, Quiorra's outta the shower now so why don't ya just get in ya car and come here and the three of us will figure it out together."**

"Okay. Alright. See you in ten."

()()

Shiro and Ulquiorra were the only guys with naturally pale skin who could pull off an all white ensemble with out looking like sickly ghosts. Ichigo found the couple up on the sundeck of their loft wearing matching silky white bathrobes and slippers and sipping iced lattes and eating non-fat yogurt filled muffins just as Shiro had said.

Ichigo wetted his lips with his tongue. He could use a drink too. Although he'd rather have juice or tea.

"Kurosaki, nice of you to join us," Ulquiorra pulled out a chair, "Have a seat." 

Ichigo sat down and rested his chin in the palm of his hand.

Shiro slipped his straw out of his mouth and grinned, 'So Ichi, what do ya think of alligators?"

Orange brows furrowed. "Alligators? Er I don't want to come across one or anything but their cool from a distance I guess."

Shiro shared a look with Ulquiorra. The duo snickered lightly. Ichigo found this irritating.

"Are you going to waste time asking pointless questions and trying to embarrass and annoy the hell out of me or are you actually going to help me out here?"

"Calm down Ichi, have a muffin," Shiro pushed a plate of blueberry and yogurt filled muffins towards him. Try as he might Ichigo could not resist.

Shiro and Ulquiorra shared another look before explaining what the bino meant by alligator.

"Leopard, cheetah, zebra, tiger its all been done. Far too many times-that's why Quiorra and I are thinkin' gator-not exactly easy to find but its eye catchin' and that's what we want."

Ulquiorra nodded and then added, "A second option would be something plant like-the outfit would wind itself around your body, the only down side is you wouldn't be able to move around much so instead," a snap of the fingers "Snake skin!"

"Snake skin?"

"Mmm hmm snake skin, white snake skin."

"Ya are so right Quiorra, don't know why I didn't think of it."

Errr snake skin? Really?

Gold eyes glittered, "It'll be hot! Don't ya agree Ichi?"

Ichigo wasn't sure he could imagine himself in snake skin.

"Won't it make my skin look er…washed out or something?"

He took a bite out of his muffin while he awaited a response.

"Trust us, we know what we're talking about." The powdered duo chimed in unison.

()()

"Forget it Shiro I'm not going to show off my midriff in front of my family."

Truthfully the white snake skin tank only showed off a small strip of flesh but Ichigo still didn't feel comfortable.

Just because he was ready to show the world-show Grimmjow that he was ready to embrace the gayness that had been there all along didn't mean he was going to wear something so scandalous no matter how "hot" Shiro and Ulquiorra claimed it was.

Shiro combed his fingers through his white bangs, "Fine Ichi, we'll go with the snake skin vest instead, will that make ya happy?"

Ichigo wasn't really a fan of vests but it was the lesser of two evil so…

"What about a shirt underneath?"

Ulquiorra who had been modeling an outfit in one of the opposite mirrors looked over his shoulder and at the orange berry, "This isn't a casual dinner party Kurosaki-it's a celebration-a rainbow-tastic extravaganza. You honestly believe anyone is going to give a fuck about whether or not you're wearing something underneath your vest. Skin is in. Chest. Abs. Ass. It's all that matters."

Ichigo did not agree with this. "Physical appearances aren't the only thing that matters to me. What about brains? Personality?"

Ulquiorra and Shiro snorted and Ichigo felt his irritation rising yet again.

"Well if that's all anyone cares about maybe I won't go to this stupid party at all!"

Ulquiorra clucked his tongue in disapproval, green eyes rolling, "Honestly Kurosaki this isn't the time for dramatics. Of course there's more to life and love then just looks but you need to remember that this isn't just a party-it's a party with hundreds of hot and horny gay men. There will be music, alcohol and lots and lots of skin. You don't like it? Well maybe you should have stayed inside the closet."

Ichigo glared daggers Ulquiorra but naturally the green-eyed male wasn't fazed in the least.

"Ya two need to calm your asses down-there's no need to get so angry. Quiorra why don't you go try on some shoes and I'll finish up with Ichi?"

Ulquiorra nodded albeit a bit reluctantly.

And now it was just Ichigo and Shiro.

Ichigo slumped down on one of the benches inside the department store-thankful that the 3rd floor was basically deserted-meant if he was about to have a break down only Shiro would be around to witness it.

"Why is it always about sex? Doesn't anyone give a damn about forming a connection-creating a bond anymore? I mean why can't I just go to the Drunken Seahorse in my pajamas and a tank or something? Who cares about comfort so long as its sexy isn't that right? If you ask me I think its bulllshit!" Ichigo clenched and unclenched his fists, "Why am I always made to feel and look like an idiot? The butt of everyone's joke? Why does everyone have to treat me like-

The cushioned bench sunk just a little bit when Shiro sat down "Ichi listen to me ya can't keep doing this to ya self. It isn't healthy."

Ichigo snorted not really giving a damn-didn't care to hear more lectures from his shameless cousin.

None of this shit would have ever happened if he had just made a move-ignored the feelings of jealousy and betrayal and just…made a damn move.

Not to say that he wouldn't have delivered a solid right hook cracking that beautiful chiseled cheek bone-not to say he wouldn't have…

"Ichi I know ya can hear me."

Yeah he could hear Shiro. Crystal fucking clear. Wished the bino would shut up. Seriously.

Ichigo glared at the floor-

"Come on Ichi buck up it's not so bad."

Easy for Shiro to say. He wasn't living in Ichigo's head right now.

"…"

"Alright Queen ya've given me no other choice. Let's try a compromise?"

Ichigo banished thoughts of Grimmjow in favor of giving Shiro his complete attention. "When you say compromise you mean-?"

"I mean no make up-no hair extensions-no boots and a different pair of pants-something closer to your typical style but more high-end. Keep the snake-skin vest and the matching belt and change everything else."

Compromise. Best thing Ichigo had heard all day.

"Deal."

()()

After Ulquiorra had apologized, Ichigo accepted and Shiro pulled both of them into a group hug the powdered duo dropped the berry off by his car.

"Shiro and I will come for you and get you suited for the party about an hour or two before it starts but for now we will part here because I have errands to run and-

"Ya need to get ya butt over to the Drunken Seahorse ASAP Ichi, Karin and Yuzu tried to stop it but ya old man is at again."

Bottle green eyes flashed and narrowed "Shiro what have I told _you_ about interrupting me?"

The golden-eyed male just grinned and planted a big wet kiss on his lovers cheek and then turned back to Ichigo "Get movin' Ichi, time waits for no man as they say."

()()

Ichigo could feel the beginning of a headache coming on as he drove towards the Drunken Seahorse. Not sure what the hell to expect but wishing-hoping that it wasn't to late to stop goat faces' madness.

()()

While he searched for parking Ichigo mentally rehearsed what he was going to say when he saw his rival later on that night. His number one goal was to be clear, direct and say exactly what he felt without hesitation.

Not right away. In front of a large crowd with all of those eyes watching them. But after most of the guests had cleared out and went home,

Before that moment came Ichigo was also determined to keep things casual, friendly hoping it wouldn't throw his former rival off. The last thing he wished for was to be viewed as some kind of tease who played games and sent mixed signals.

But Ichigo also knew he couldn't just jump into Grimmjow's arms-couldn't just kiss the half Canadian senseless like a love-sick twit from one of those chick flicks.

After all there was a lot of history between him and Grimmjow. Lots to discuss. Ichigo still hadn't entirely forgiven the other male-still felt hurt, confused, angered, bitter, irritated.

It wasn't Ichigo's intention to dwell on the past but he wanted-needed to make everything crystal fucking clear-he would not be toyed with! And in return he'd listen to Grimmjow's side of things-treat the other the way he wished to be treated.

The two of them were no longer teenagers so acting like fools was out of the question.

The night seemed so far away and yet at the same time it seemed like it was flying towards Ichigo like a speeding bullet.

()()

Ichigo climbed the many flights of stairs leading into the Drunken Seahorse passing several men and women dressed in aquamarine and black coats along the way. One group carried a humongous 3 latyr vanilla and mint chocolate ice cream swirl cake. Another group winked, blew him kisses and whistled in appreciation.

Ichigo rolled his eyes and continued up the stairs not quite looking where he was going he nearly crashed into-

"Yuzu?!"

His sister jumped a bit in surprise, her chef's hat falling off her sandy blonde head and at Ichigo's feet. Yuzu beamed up at Ichigo before bending down to pick up her hat, dust it off and place it back on her head.

"Onii-chan you weren't supposed to see me-it was supposed to be a surprise." She looked a little miffed. Well as miffed as a girl like Yuzu could look anyway.

"Gomen Yuzu, would it make you feel better if I pretended I never saw you?"

Yuzu shook her head, "Karin-chan told Shiro to keep you distracted while we oh never mind, you're here now so might as well get on with it." She took hold of Ichigo's hand and encouraged him to follow her down the hall continuing the conversation while they walked.

"Wait til' you see what Karin-chan and Toshiro-kun have set up. You're going to die Onii-chan, just die!"

He could hear the excitement in Yuzu's voice but wasn't sure he could share her enthusiasm.

"Sorry I haven't been around much this week Onii-chan but I've been working really hard along side Ruki-nee and Hime-san and everyone to make sure your big night is a hit! Kaa-chan was with us earlier but she had to leave to pick up something-or someone-even though I begged and begged she wouldn't tell me the details," a shrug, "Guess it doesn't really matter though we'll all find out in a few hours anyway."

Yuzu stopped walking just then and Ichigo looked at her "Something wrong Yuzu?"

The teen girl looked thoughtful for a moment as she studied Ichigo with her big eyes, "Not wrong exactly but something seems different," a pause "Did something happen to you Onii-chan?"

Ichigo felt his face grow a little warm which was ridiculous since Yuzu's question was perfectly innocent. Still…Yuzu couldn't have figured out where he was last night could she have? She'd always been perceptive and wise beyond her years-her and Karin both actually but Yuzu was usually less vocal and maybe she was asking because she could still smell the alcohol on his breath?

"Onii-chan?"

Ichigo shook his head. No that wasn't possible. He made sure to brush and floss before he left-hell he didn't even have a hangover so there was no way Yuzu could-

"Onii-chan are you sure you're-

"I'm fine Yuzu," he flashed his sister a reassuring smile. "Tell me more about what you and Karin have been up to this week."

()()

The Drunken Seahorse wasn't an average hotel. Far from it.

In fact although Ichigo was no where near an expert when it came to architecture and interior design but it almost seemed like the hotel had once been a mansion or something-he would discover that he was not far off in his thinking as Yuzu explained,

"The architect who originally built this place had a lot of time on his hands. There are 18 floors, well over 300 hundred bedrooms-not including the master suites. The Drunken Seahorse is so much more than just a 5 star hotel it also serves as a restaurant and sports arena. At one time it even served as rehabilitation center. Half of the doors and windows around here are purely made for show. He was a bit of a dreamer-an artist really.

Didn't care much for logic or reason. He looked at building structures as a way to empty his mind. The ceilings are made entirely out of white oak and are high arched and dome shaped-it seemed like he didn't quite know what theme to run with so he did a little bit of everything blending Western with European styles-his wife had a fondness for stained glass so he built the grand hall with her in mind. We're heading there now."

()()

There was a lot of commotion coming from behind the stained double glass doors-

"What's going on in there Yuzu?"

Yuzu did not answer but pulled one of the handles and stepped inside expecting Ichigo to follow. He did.

()()

Wishing he hadn't when he spotted several familiar looking faces. "Uh Yuzu why are all of these pe-

"This is a special occasion Onii-chan. We were going to keep it between close family and friends- originally planned to just mail the invitations out to everyone you knew but some where along the way some of your former classmates decided that they wanted to help in the planning and well…Kaa-chan and Tou-chan thought it would be a good idea to have a few extra hands and-

Ichigo didn't want to come off as rude or ungrateful so he nodded his head and smiled at his sister, "Thanks, Yuzu."

()()

Karin had always been a natural leader and so it came as no real surprise to find her bossing around men who were twice her size, barking out orders and snapping her fingers when the men wouldn't move fast enough. At her side, stood Toshiro, with arms crossed and icicle blues sharp as daggers pinning the hopeless bastards with the kind of stare that could chase a cheetah up a tree.

Ichigo couldn't help but chuckle a bit. All this for a coming out party?

Yuzu tugged on his sleeve and whispered in his ear, "I know it might seem a bit over the top to you Onii-chan but Karin-chan only wants to give you the best," a smile, "As do I."

Ichigo didn't know the first thing about lighting or stage production no matter how many school plays he had been in but he was impressed.

"Karin-chan is determined to have the spotlight shine on you at all times."

Ichigo bit back a groan. He was afraid of something like that.

"I hope you won't hate me too much if I leave you now Onii-chan but I really need to get back to the kitchens. While I trust Hanatarou-kun is doing a good job he tends to get a bit frazzled when left alone for too long but I'll see you later," she squeezed his hand and then disappeared behind a different set of doors.

/CRASH/

Ichigo winced. That chandelier looked quite expensive.

"YOU IDIOTS! WHAT THE HELL DID I TELL YOU ABOUT RUNNING?!"

Ichigo watched for awhile as Karin and Toshiro took turns chewing out one incompetent worker after another before making his way over to the duo.

()()

"Ichi-nii!"

"Hi, Karin."

"Kurosaki."

Ichigo rolled his eyes, "Really Toshiro you've been dating my little sister for 2 and a half years now I think you can call me by my first name."

Toshiro grumbled something under his breath but Ichigo didn't quite catch it.

"Anyway," Karin stepped away from the stage in order to greet Ichigo properly.

Their hugs were never long but Ichigo cherished the moment all the same.

"Minus the idiots around here everything is running right on schedule."

"Karin I appreciate all that you have done but you don't have to run yourself ragged for some dumb party."

Her dark eyes flashed and Ichigo realized it was the wrong thing to say.

"It's NOT A DUMB PARTY! It's your party Ichi-nii-YOUR COMING OUT PARTY even though I've always known the rest of the world hasn't and so it is my JOB-MY MISSION to show you in the best light and YOU WILL EMBRACE IT!"

Ichigo flinched. And yet at the same time he felt proud. Karin had always been a bit of spitfire but the older she became the more impressed he was. She had grown up so fast-it seemed like only yesterday he was helping Kaa-san rock her to sleep and now-

"Why are you looking at me like that?" the dark haired teen snapped.

"No reason."

Karin did not look convinced, her left brow twitching.

Ichigo did not know what else to do but apologize.

"Will you forgive your older brother for sounding ungrateful?"

Dark brown eyes rolled. "Of course I can't stay mad at you Ichi-nii since I know you and I know you didn't even want a party in the first place I just thought-

"You don't have to explain anything Karin. I was being an ass and I apologize. I promise I will be a better brother from here on out."

Because Ichigo prided himself on being a good brother-he'd give Karin and Yuzu the world if he could.

"…"

"So I originally came here because Shiro said goat face was up to his old tricks again."

"Oh! Oh yeah how could I have forgotten something like that," Karin shook her head, "Yeah he's up to his old tricks again is right. Yuzu, Kaa-chan and I tried to reason with him but you know how he is."

Sadly. Yes. Ichigo did know how his father was.

"It all started when Kaa-chan suggested that there should be some type of professional dancers for the party-flamenco dancers to be exact but then goat face, the big idiot, turns around and has 50 flamingos shipped here from overseas," eye roll, "Then with the help of his work buddies he piled all of the flamingos into a giant moving truck and some how don't ask me how managed to dress the flamingos in white tutus and slippers. It would almost be impressive and entertaining if…it wasn't illegal."

Flamingos? Really? And in tutus? Not for the first time Ichigo found himself questioning whether or not his father was actually a pod person?

"Where are they now Karin?"

"Goat face is just behind the Seahorse and well…nobody knows where Kaa-chan went but she'll be back before your party starts."

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow liked tea as well as the next guy-consumed quite a lot of it during his childhood but now wasn't the time for a leisurely tea and crumpet hour.

Atobe had flown in from England so naturally at the very least he could offer his estranged half brother a cup of tea and perhaps a biscuit or two but this wasn't his reason for calling him out here.

"Are you almost done?"

Atobe raised an elegant mauve colored brow and his midnight navy blue eyes flashed, "Ore-sama will finish drinking his tea at Ore-sama's preferred pace. He will rush for anyone."

Really? Really?! The whole speaking in third person thing was getting on Grimmjow's nerves. He found it hard to believe that he was related to such an egotistical diva. (5)

He drummed his fingers on the table impatiently as Atobe continued eating and drinking at a leisurely pace.

Grimmjow was beginning to regret this whole thing-one of his worst ideas to date.

Atobe was so into himself that they hadn't even discussed the reason for his being here. Hadn't even come up with a plan.

Sure Grimmjow had the 3 pieces of parchment he'd written as Masaki instructed/suggested but he wanted to do something more. Something to make it crystal fucking clear that Kurosaki was his-would always be his-had always been his even though they had never been together officially.

But all Grimmjow had come up with was a not so original scenario that involved dragging Kurosaki out of the party by his hair and carrying his strawberry princess back to his den-well assuming they made it out of the parking lot.

()()

(Ichigo)

Ichigo let out a defeated sigh as he examined himself in the mirror. At the last minute Shiro and Ulquiorra had decided to 86 the white snake-skin and presented a vest made entirely out of golden bird feathers instead. Though Ichigo doubted they were real he wasn't a fan of feathers.

Shiro finished zipping up his mango orange boots and grinned at Ichigo "Ya look great Ichi!"

"I look like a jackass."

Ulquiorra finished outlining his lower lip with a thin red pencil and turned to him, a disapproving scowl on his mannequin like face, "I'll have you know that I wore something very similar on my 18th birthday. To say that you look like a donkey implies that I look like a donkey, are you calling me a donkey Kurosaki?"

()()

(Grimmjow)

"So this young man you're attracted to, is he aware of your feelings towards him?"

"Kind of."

Grimmjow really didn't feel comfortable giving details to others-call him paranoid or whatever but he some how felt that explaining his deepest feelings and thoughts in regards to his rival it would some how back fire and the universe would make it impossible for him to have Kurosaki at all.

"Kind of?"

Grimmjow could hear the impatience in Atobe's voice. It was weird. Seemed when the older make was angry or irritated his tone would drop-damn near a dead ringer for Grimmjow's own

()

Must be a genetic thing.

"…"

"Ore-sama asked you a question."

"…"

"And Ore-sama expects an answer."

"Yeah he does," here Grimmjow flashed his half sibling a Cheshire cat like grin," He just needs an extra reminder. That's why I've asked you to come here. I want to give him flowers but I don't want to just hand them or have them delivered to him-I want to do something di-

Atobe held up his perfectly manicured hand silencing Grimmjow "There isn't a need to go any further Ore-sama knows exactly what to do."

()()

(Ichigo)

Well he'd ridden a wild boar and a white tiger and hadn't died yet so why not top it off and ride atop a mechanical peacock?

"It's not as complicated as if might look son, a lot like mounting a horse really. These tiny pegs near the peacocks' thighs is where you plant your feet and right below the neck two more, these ones have a slight curve to them but anyway that is where you will place your hands. Would you like me to demonstrate?"

Ichigo glared at his moronic old man. "No thanks, I think I can figure it out."

Isshin slapped him on his back, "Ha-ha that's the spirit!"

Why Ichigo had agreed to go a long with his father's lame brained idea he couldn't say but he was and there was no backing out now. The hall was already filling up with people and his family members were expecting him to shine.

So rather reluctantly Ichigo climbed atop the mechanical peacock and waited for further instruction-

He looked up at the sound of hurried footsteps-a blur of coral pink and white was rushing towards him-

"Kurosaki-kun!"

It was Inoue. Although slightly out of breath from running she looked as radiant as her name suggested even as she nearly tripped over her cranberry spiked heels and passed a decorative headpiece to him "I almost for got to give you this when we were in the dressing room earlier but Ruki-bunny reminded me."

Gee. Thanks Rukia. However will I repay you?

Ichigo forced himself to smile. "Thanks, Inoue."

The buxom brunette beamed at him, "Anything for you, Kurosaki-kun. Oh! Isshin-san I didn't notice you there, how are things?"

While Isshin rambled Inoue's ear off Ichigo scanned the back stage for his mother.

()()

Ichigo tried to ignore how much he hated every minute of the night so far (never mind that it had barely even started) and opted to look at the bright side of things. At least his Kaa-san had been kind/sensible enough to give him some normal clothing.

"_Smile, let them take a few pictures and then you can change into this."_

_She held up shirt no not just a shirt but a nice ¾ sleeve shirt made out of a material that was softer than cotton and in a soft periwinkle blue color and one of his favorite pairs of jeans. _

_Okay so maybe it was a little weird to have his mother shop for him or go through his closet but…that aside…it was the thought that counted. And Ichigo was grateful._

And at least he wasn't expected to give some long speech like the guy on stage

Barely 5'6 with spiky brown hair and large brown eyes, not exactly scrawny per se but slimmer than Ishida and looking like he'd rather be anywhere but on stage at the Drunken Seahorse.

Voice trembling, the microphone shaking in his hand-

"T-Tonight we we-

Ichigo shook his head. This guy was clearly uncomfortable-any one with half of brain could see it so why the hell-

"Nobody needs an introduction fucking-chibi!"

"Hieeeeee!"

Bullets fired from out of nowhere-Ichigo looked around and then spotted the shooter-a tall demonic cackling blond was peeking out from one of the curtains in one of the top balconies on the other side of the hall-

"YA-HAAAA!" (6)

If Ichigo wasn't currently in a stupid costume and sitting at the table with his family he would have rushed to the brunets' defense because it was the right thing to do-said brunet although no doubt shitting himself-managed to some how dodge and duck out of the way-the shooter took this zx some sort of challenge and more bullets were fired-but again (luckily/miraculously) the small brunet dodged and dived out of harms way-

"Hiiiiiiieeeeeeeee Hiruuuuuma-saaaaaaan!"

WTF?

This poor fool actually knew the devil up in the balcony?

Ichigo looked at his family expecting some type of explanation.

Masaki was the one to answer as she leaned over and-

"I know it seems a bit over the tip but Hiruma Youichi is the best at what he does."

Ichigo did not understand. Why was his Kaa-san praising a madman?

"What exactly is it that this Hiruma specializes in? I mean aside from scaring the crap out of the announcer that is?"

Masaki's eyes twinkled and she giggled behind her hand. "Just watch."

Watch? Watch what exactly? Ichigo did not understand. What did any of this have to do with his announcement to the world that he was gay?

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow was going to murder Atobe. 30 minutes. 30 fucking minutes late to the party. To Kurosaki's coming out party. And why? Because the diva had to stop in a mall and buy a new scarf and dress shoes for the occasion-never mind that he wasn't going to make much more than a cameo appearance if even that much. Bastard hadn't even been invited. Didn't even know who Kurosaki was.

Grimmjow was fucking irritated, pissed, all of the above. The last thing he needed was some estranged older half brother to steal his spotlight!

()()

(Ichigo)

The canon went off but it wasn't a ball that shot out of it but a giant air balloon in the shape of rainbow striped seahorse and much to Ichigo's surprise/disbelief the brunet managed to get on top of it when it hovered and flew around on stage. Clearly it was a special air balloon strong enough to hold human weight.

"Sure beats your average magic show, doesn't it?"

"Kaa-san?"

Masaki planted a kiss on Ichigo's make up covered cheek "Happy Coming Out, Ichigo!"

"Erm thanks I guess."

()()

Ichigo felt annoyed. No scratch that he felt fucking pissed. An hour and 50 minutes into this damn coming out party and he hadn't seen hide nor hair of his former rival.

He'd seen just about every other familiar face in Karakura Town-had sat through and listened to several speeches, poems and songs about romance and staying true to your 'true self' about happily ever after and how 'children of the rainbow' make the world a better place.

Then came 15 minute comedy sketch with several jocks on soccer team dressed in mini skirts and tank tops. It went on and on…Karin and Yuzu and his mother presented a slide show-it was by sheer will alone that Ichigo didn't turn redder than Renji's hair and flee to the nearest exit doors.

The icing on the cake though was when goat face got up and gave a long winded speech about 'how he had always known he'd have at least one gay son'…'how oh so proud he was' and 'how one time many many moons ago when he was a young lad of 14 he fooled around with his best friend behind the bleachers-luckily he hadn't been able to finish 'his oh so detailed-way too much damn detail speech" as Masaki dragged him off the stage by his ear.

Shiro cackling loudly didn't help matters.

Still…all of this "horror" would be totally and completely worth it if a certain blue haired bastard had come.

But no. Grimmjow hadn't come and Ichigo felt like he'd been stabbed in the chest all over again.

So yeah he was fucking PISSED!

Watching all of the happy couples both gay and straight alike, mingle and dance and whisper and murmur sweet nothings didn't help matters.

Damn Grimmjow. Damn him to the 7 gates of hell and beyond!

()()

(Grimmjow)

"Can't you fly this thing any damn faster?"

"What has Ore-sama told out about snapping out demands," eyes flashing, "We do this my way or we don't do it at all."

Oh that was fucking it!

Grimmjow didn't give a damn about morals-not that he ever had in the first place!

Why should he?

On an important night such as this one he had zero patience. Hell if he'd miss his chance to make things right with Kurosaki!

Grimmjow unbuckled his seat belt, not caring in the least about how stupid and dangerous it was, and elbowed Atobe to the side.

Bad move.

The helicopter swerved and Atobe's fingers slipped-

"You idiot! What the hell do you think you're doing? Let go before you kill us!"

()()

(Ichigo)

"Something wrong, Ichigo-chan?"

The question came from a guy with a natural silver colored perm and fish lidded red eyes, he was seated at the next table over and had abandoned his sweet cake in order to talk to the berry.

But Ichigo wasn't in the mood for conversation.

Silver-perm wasn't the type of guy to back down as he walked over to the berry a few minutes later. Ichigo's brow twitched in irritation but the other guy just sat down and continued, "This is supposed to be a celebration and yet you aren't celebrating."

"…"

"Could it be you're waiting for some one?"

Ichigo's head shot up but he still said nothing although upon a closer look he did recognize the guy with the silver perm.

Sakata Gintoki, yeah this guy was a junior when he was a freshman and he was also a student at Uncle Kaien's dojo-one of the top students if memory served correct.

As the memories of a silver-headed boy with fish lidded eyes continued to resurface Ichigo dimly remembered another youth-complete opposite of Gintoki. Dark hair, dark eyes, smoked like a chimney, had an abnormal obsession for all things mayo-the two often clashed even though they were equally matched in the martial arts department. (6)

"You here with Hijikata?"

()()

(Grimmjow)

The two half brothers struggled for control over the helicopter-abandoning any and all pleasantries or tolerance-damn near trying to rip each other's faces off!

Grimmjow snarled angrily as Atobe's overpriced gawdy ring cut the side of his jaw-with out blinking he retaliated and damn near gouged out Atobe's left eye-the helicopter continued to swerve and spin out of control-to a casual observer passing by it might look like the opening scene in an action movie but it was anything but.

Grimmjow knew he needed to calm down. If he didn't get his anger under control he was not only going to crash the helicopter he and Atobe were going to die.

()()

(Ichigo)

Gintoki flushed a little bit and then cleared his throat. "This isn't about me. This is about you."

Ichigo furrowed his brows wondering why Gintoki was blushing when all he said was-oh! Oh so that's how it was. A smirk made its way on his lips-for a moment just for a moment Ichigo was enjoying himself again-he turned to Gintoki and pressed the older male for more information-

"So you _are_ here with Hijikata then. Interesting. So if you don't mind my asking which one of you made the first move?"

Gintoki sputtered and Ichigo chuckled.

It was a nice change. To be the one teasing instead of being teased.

"Oi, oi let's not get off subject here you're the one whose the star here so let's talk about you Ichigo-chan," Gintoki leaned in and looked at Ichigo expectantly, "Who stole your heart and refused to give it back?"

()()

(Grimmjow)

"Get off me you uncouth plebeian!"

"Dream on diva-boy!"

"This is Ore-sama's helicopter-you-

Grimmjow sneered and snarled out "I don't give a flying fuck. I'm not going to let you ruin my chance to make things right-now get off!"

A particularly harsh shove and Atobe nearly flew out the helicopter door-quick reflexes always being one of Grimmjow's greatest skills, he managed to catch the diva before things went from bad to worse.

Atobe looked shocked and relieved at the same time although rather than express his gratitude like a proper human being he…

"But of course you caught me for the world would not be the same if Ore-sama were not in it. Be awed by my-

"Yeah, yeah shut up already and just sit down."

Atobe let out an indignant huff and Grimmjow wiped his bleeding chin and chuckled.

()()

(Ichigo)

Ichigo's spirits had been lifted after his conversation with Gintoki. The silver-haired man had given him hope.

"_So long as the night isn't over there is still a chance."_

Maybe Grimmjow was coming but was simply running late-after all back when they were school boys his rival had hardly ever been on time for anything.

He glanced at one the clocks and made a decision. He was going to leave the main hall for a short while and then when he returned everything would be just the way it should be.

()()

(Grimmjow)

The helicopter hadn't crashed it had run out of fuel and so the land wasn't as smooth as Grimmjow would have liked. But then again nothing ever went quite as he planned.

()()

His shirt was ripped and splattered with blood and grass stains in various places. His hair was a complete mess and half of the flowers that had been tightly held in his grasp had been crushed during his scuffle with Atobe.

Definitely not the way Grimmjow had wished things to play out but he'd have to find a way to deal with it.

Hopefully Masaki wouldn't make good on her threat and keep him locked outside of the party. Hopefully Kurosaki would appreciate that he at least made an effort to do something nice for him and forget about tiny little things like his current lack of shoes.

Hopefully his strawberry princess would look past all of Grimmjow's faults and just-

"Where do you think you're going dressed like some plebian in a flea market?"

What was Atobe still doing here? He was sure the diva had already taken off and yet here he stood looking at Grimmjow expectantly.

Probably wanted to be refunded for his flight out here or whatever.

"Look if it means that damn much to you I'll reimburse you for the flight and pay for the damages done to the copter."

Atobe flicked a mauve colored bang out of his eyes, "Ore-sama is not concerned with such trifle matters. He can acquire plenty of helicopters or jets at any time for he is Ore-sama after all."

Grimmjow snorted. Once again having a difficult time grasping that he and this 'guy' had come out of the same womb.

Even with his mauve colored hair in complete disarray, his left eye swollen and dried with blood, the sleeves on his designer dress shirt ripped and a hole near the crotch of his pants, standing barefoot on the freshly mowed lawn, Atobe some how managed to look as pompous and royal as ever.

Leather patent shoes in hand but not for long-it appeared as though he was passing his shoes to Grimmjow.

A raised brow, "What do you expect me to do with your shoes?"

A smirk, "Consider it an engagement gift. Ore-sama can appreciate a good love story as well as any other. Now go and get your boy!"

Grimmjow frowned down at the shoes. Not really his style but…

Atobe tapped his stocking foot impatiently "You are wasting more time."

Yes he was wasting time. Had been wasting time. But so what-what was a few more minutes…

"You never did tell me your grand idea."

Atobe' eyes flashed.

()()

(Ichigo)

For the sake of his sanity it was best to remain calm and not violently attack the former pepto prince but to wait until Szayel exited the scene and it was just Renji left sitting at the table. Ichigo walked over and sat down,

"Renji you look happy, are you?"

It was an awkward way to start a conversation especially since not too long ago the redhead had been one of Ichigo's best friends.

Ichigo shook his head deciding it didn't matter since the only reason he and Renji had had a falling out in the first place was because of Grimmjow and Grantz.

Ichigo ignored the fact that Renji was apparently still in some sort of weird relationship with Grantz and just tried to focus on mending their friendship.

Renji seemed a bit hesitant to say anything at first, his eyes not quite meeting Ichigo's as he twirled his drink with his straw.

"…"

Not receiving an answer Ichigo tried a some what different approach. "So what made you come tonight other than the free food?"

It was a joke-meant to lighten the mood-make it less tense and weird.

And it worked

Once Renji got started he barely took a breather in between each sentence-his tattooed head bolting upwards-

"Hey! I didn't just come here for the free food I came here to see you too! Had to beg Rukia for an invitation since I never received one in the mail-not that I expected nor should I have expected anything from you," he rushed to say "But well to be honest I'm pissed that the silence has continued on this long-it's not like you to hold a grudge even though I know I was an idiot but you knew that and decided to become friends with me anyway.

And I know saying "sorry" now seems rather pointless but I am sorry Ichigo-sorry for being weak-getting caught up in that bastard's plot-noticed he didn't show up to night-chicken shit fucker and he lectures me-damn hypocrite of hypocrites I swear !" The redhead slammed a fist on the table "Still that ain't a reason to screw him and his-well anyway all we can do is move forward and start over…can't we Ichigo?"

If Ichigo were cruel he would have flat out said, "No we can not move forward" but that wasn't the kind of guy Ichigo was.

"I don't know what happened between you and-what happened back then-not all the details and in a way I think its better that way because if I learned them now I can't promise that I would be able to continue to sit here calmly and not punch your face in."

Renji flinched, "Yeah well if you did I would take it since I know I kinda deserve it."

"Yeah."

"…Yeah."

Renji fiddled with his braided pony tail for a moment, "So uh I know you're probably wondering why I'm here with Gran-Szayel and the reason is and don't hate me for saying this but he just-look I know he and Jaegerass were like best buddies or whatever and I know the two of them made your life and mine hell at times but-

"But?" Ichigo encouraged his friend to keep speaking because even though he said he wouldn't be able to handle Renji's side of the story-even though he was currently clenching and unclenching his fists under the table he needed to know. Needed to understand.

"But Szayel he just he gets me you know? Well no maybe you don't know how could you since I never really told you how he-how we and-look its like this he was/is an entirely different person when its just me and him and somewhere along the way I-shit Ichigo why do you have to keep looking at me like that? You know this isn't easy for me to say!"

Ichigo remained calm although he was getting a bit irritated that Renji was practically barking at him now.

Renji fell silent-eyes landing to the floor.

After a moment or two…

"You think any of this is easy for me?" Ichigo countered letting some of his irritation slip into his tone but still not going off the deep end.

Renji's head shot up again "No! I never said that don't put words into my mouth! You know I hate that Ichigo."

"And I hate liars but alas the world is an imperfect place and we are just two guys-two former best friends living in it."

"I didn't lie to you!" Renji came off sounding more defensive rather than outraged.

Ichigo quirked a brow, "What do you call it then?"

"I uh-omitting details-yeah I omitted a few details like how I wound up with my head between Jeagerass crotch and-

Ichigo willed himself not to explode at the reminder of what had transpired between his former rival and his former best friend that night. "I'm not talking about that and you know it Renji."

"Well yeah but I figured we should-I mean you need to understand Ichigo when I went to Jeager I was a desperate love sick school boy willing to do just about anything to-," Renji trailed off and mumbled something unintelligible under his breath.

Under any other circumstance it would have been amusing. Since back in their school days the tattooed redhead had always been a bit of an odd ball-it's what gave him personality but right now Ichigo wasn't amused.

"Renji I didn't come over here to start another fight with you."

"Then why did you come over here?"

"…To understand."

"Understand what exactly?"

Ichigo struggled to find the right words, "Understand why-if you hated Grimmjow so much why you would subject yourself to-no forget it I said we weren't going to talk about that. I want to understand why even when I tried to make peace with you by sending you that holiday steak I never got a response."

Renji looked baffled, "Steak?"

Ichigo resisted the urge to roll his eyes remembering that the redhead tended to be forgetful at times.

"Never-mind. The point I'm trying to make-what I'm trying to accomplish here is-

Accomplish? No that wasn't the right word. Ichigo wasn't trying to accomplish something.

"Yeah?"

Ichigo shook his head. "Forget it."

"No tell me! It's been so long since you-don't shut me out Ichigo I don't care if it makes me sound like a chick I missed you and I don't want this night to end with you still being mad at me! Not that you're not allowed to be mad at me but can you do it with out the silence? Can't we just-

But the redhead never got to finish his sentence/question…a loud whirring noise-almost sounding like a jet engine or something drowned out every other sound-

Renji looked at Ichigo. Ichigo looked back at Renji. Fingers plugged in his ears the redhead mouthed, "What's going on?"

Ichigo shrugged and mouthed back, "I don't know."

The whirring sound became louder and louder-damn near deafening and then a moment later it died out and a voice from the outside came through the speakers-

"**For your immediate safety calmly move to the opposite end of the hall."**

Ichigo did not recognize the voice and taking one glance at Renji told him the redhead didn't recognize the voice either. He looked around the room noticing that his family, friends and former classmates seemed just as clueless.

"What's going on?"

"Who is that?"

"What's happening?"

"**I repeat, for your immediate safely calmly move to the opposite end of the hall. It is not our goal to injure or harm any one."**

"He said our like there's more than one of them-what's going on? Whose up there?"

Up there meaning the stained glass sky light roof of the building.

It wasn't a great surprise when many of the guests started to panic and try and flee for the exit doors-nearly knocking one another over in the process.

"Everyone please stay calm I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for all of this. Do not leave the party." The owner of the Drunken Seahorse, Urahara, didn't sound nearly as calm as he was pretending to be-his gray eyes darting like a startled bird from underneath his striped hat. His girlfriend, Haineko, had a steel grip on his arm, her bottom lip trembling.

And she wasn't the only woman looking uneasy and worried…many of the women in the room looked like they would rather be any where but the Drunken Seahorse right now.

Ichigo sighed. Go figure something like this would happen on the night of his coming out party. Such was the story of his life.

"**Enough with the pleasantries-ORE-SAMA TOLD YOU TO MOVE!"**

"Ore-sama? Who the hell-? Ichigo I know I haven't seen you in a couple of years but just what kind of people do you hang around these days."

What the hell was Renji talking about/accusing him of? He didn't know who the hell was outside-

Several hurried footsteps…

"Ichigooooo!"

"Kurosaki-kun."

"Ichigo."

"Kurosaki."

"Ichigo."

Just like the old days…Keigo, Inoue, Rukia, Ishida and Chado would come rushing to his side expecting him to do something about the disruption or offering to assist him.

Ichigo didn't plan on doing anything since the guy or guys out side didn't seem threatening just impatient.

Still…something told him this night was about to get a whole lot wilder.

And then over the course of the next few minutes the sounds of everyone's voices became muted and Ichigo found himself staring up at the stained glass sky roof-could not tear his gaze away-did not move even though he could feel some one tugging his arm-

Everything slowed to a grinding halt…or at least it seemed this way to Ichigo-

The helicopter disappeared from view and something smashed into the window-shattered the glass into teeny tiny pieces-

Hundreds and hundreds of roses and rose petals rained down…decorating the dance floor-giving it the appearance of a perfect garden scene in summer time.

A moment later a figure dropped in, wearing a striped cat mask and carrying more roses. Tall, muscular and quite obviously male. Careful to step around the glass the masked figure made his way towards the stairs, bounding each step with purpose-

Ichigo could hear excited chattering and curious murmurs and once again he wondered what everyone else wondered-just what the hell was going on and who was this party crasher?

A sudden chill came over Ichigo but it wasn't an unpleasant one. More like…familiar. Cinnamon and coffee brown eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, his mouth dropped open like a cod-fish as the masked party crasher unveiled himself-

Wide Cheshire cat like grin stretching across his chiseled features-he flung the mask to the side and grabbed hold of the microphone-addressed the crowd-no not the crowd but him-

Electric blues locked on Ichigo and Ichigo alone

"Better later than never ain't that right _**Kurosaki?"**_

Ichigo swallowed the invisible lump that had suddenly formed in his throat.

'_**Grimmjow.'**_

TBC

It's the rough translation to a song called "Rival" performed by (Suwabe Junichi/Atobe Keigo) …Tenipuri reference number 1

Cross-over character…Tenipuri's very own Atobe Keigo…why make him Grimm's half brother? Shrugs because I felt like it…LOL reference 2

_Grimmjow had met Mustang shortly after senior year outside of a court house. He could tell right away that the dark-haired teen wasn't from Karakura Town with round eyes and a square jaw. Been awhile since Grimmjow last saw anyone interesting. Maybe it was the way the kid was resting of the back of his right heel against the side of the building. Maybe it was the messenger back slung over a meaty shoulder or perhaps it was the way he held his cigarette. _

_Red faced with anger, embarrassment, his long golden braid whipping violently over a slim shoulder, Elric shouted out a string of obscenities and made angry hand gestures at the same time he was trying to steer his bicycle and not veer off and crash into a tree or a mail box or a cat. (4_

_(4) Not the first time I'm making a cross-over reference to FMA characters…this time around it was Colonel Roy Mustang and Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric_

5 A large number of the Tenipuri fandom have referred to Atobe as a DIVA. And earlier in the beginning of this story I made mention that Grimmjow had a DIVA side…that's all. GRINS.

(6) EYESHIELD21 reference Hiruma and Sena…it just…it just fit the mood I was in. YA-HA!

7 Hijikata and Gintoki…characters from the manga/anime series Gintama…I'm a HijiGin shipper…that's pretty much my only excuse. SMIRKS.

**It took a while but Sly has presented a long chapter to you…so please show Grimm, Berry and Co some love and drop a review!**

THANK YOU FOR READING!


	17. Chapter NINE

Disclaimer: Get well soon Kubo-sensei!

A/N Another chapter of Seahorse….YAY!….truthfully this should have been done weeks ago but, shrugs, things happen.

AU, OOC, spelling, grammar, punctuation, uber flashbacks, etc.

**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**

**CHAPTER NINE**

(ICHIGO)

Electric blues locked on Ichigo and Ichigo alone

"Better later than never ain't that right Kurosaki?"

Ichigo swallowed the invisible lump that had suddenly formed in his throat.

_**'Grimmjow.'**_

_**()()**_

FLASHBACK

(_**Highschool days…)**_

_It was the single most important track meet of the season and Ichigo was most likely definitely going to miss it. And why? Because Kukaku was getting married and she threatened to castrate him in his sleep if he dared not to show up for the ceremony._

_His aunt did not make empty threats._

_So instead of lacing up his track shoes and zipping up his warm up jacket Ichigo was tugging at the collar of his shirt and fixing his tie while he waited forever and a day for his bastard rival to answer the damn phone. _

_Probably had his tongue down some brainless twits coochie. '__**Asshole pickup the fucking phone.'**_

_After the sixth ring the arrogant growling rasp that Ichigo could only associate as his rivals' voice reached his ear __**"Kurosaki how the hell did you get this number?"**_

'_**Dumbass you slipped it to me 2 nights ago at the bowling alley.'**__ –Course Ichigo had no intention of stating this out loud since Grimmjow had been uber shit-faced that night and all, came as no real surprise that the other teen didn't remember._

"_Never mind that. Listen I need you to do me a favor."_

"_**A favor eh? What pray tell does my strawberry princess want from me?"**_

"_I'm not a princess damn you! And for the last time my name doesn't mean strawberry!"_

_Loud guffawing that carried on for a good 5 minutes or so-_

_Ichigo glared down at his borrowed Rolex-he didn't have time to play around today._

"_**Sure it doesn't and my middle name ain't Johan."**_

"_Joh-wait! What? No never mind I don't even want to know," aggravated sigh, "Listen I need a favor from you normally I wouldn't ask but-_

"_**Just spit it out Kurosaki! Got places to do-people to screw."**_

_As if on a cue a girlish squeal could be heard in the back round. Ichigo felt his face flush-it was exactly what he'd been expecting but still-_

"_Grimmjow!"_

"_**What?! I can hear you loud and clear Kurosaki so go ahead and say whatcha gotta say-Aa-chan here know when do be quiet don't you Aa-chan?"**_

_Giggling. Sickeningly girlish ear grating giggling could be heard crystal fucking clear. And who the fuck was Aa-chan anyway? If Ichigo had been the type of guy who didn't know his own strength he would have snapped his phone in half just then._

"_**Okie-dokie no worry Aa-chan will be a good girl ya."**_

"_**Heh, I know you will now do me a favor and say hi!"**_

_**What**__? Ichigo had no desire to say high to Grimmjow's current skank of the week. None whatsoever._

_More giggling and then "Hellooooo there Ichi-chan. Wanna come over?"_

_The fuck? No Ichigo did not want to come over-the hell was Grimmjow telling this girl?_

_And god was her voice squeaky and loud-worse than the chicks on those uber annoying shojo animes that Keigo was so obsessed with. What the hell did Grimmjow see in such a-?_

"_Uh Aa-chan was it?"_

"_**Yep, yep so you wanna play Ichi?"**_

"_Uh no I don't."_

"_**Hmm…well okie dokie, bye bye."**_

_Thankfully the silly twat passed the phone back to Grimmjow or Grimmjow grabbed it back from her-which ever it was Ichigo was grateful…well sort of._

"_What the hell__** Grimmjow?!"**_

_**Loud boisterous laughter, "Sorry Kurosaki but I had to do it-I know how shy you are around the ladies and all."**_

"_Tee-hee you called Aa-chan a lady."_

_Growling could be heard-then more high pitched squealing…_

"…"

_Seriously? WTF?_

_**A combination of giggling, moaning and sighing could be heard-Ichigo felt his face turning even brighter-**_

"_Bastard! Stop fucking around! I don't have a lot of time and I told you-_

_There was a knock on the door stopping Ichigo mid sentence._

"_Ichi-nii, Kaa-chan says we're leaving now."_

"_Ah I'll be right down Karin."_

_Ichigo held the phone close to his chest hoping to muffle the noises on the other end. He didn't know how and he didn't know when but he would find a way to get Grimmjow back for this latest shameless stunt._

_Rather than heading back down the stairs Karin opened the door and came inside. _

"_Ichi-nii is something wrong?"_

_No there was nothing wrong-nothing new either just his rival being his typical jackass self. "I'm fine Karin," Ichigo lied through his teeth, "Just on the phone with one of the guys from the team-explaining why I'm not going to make it to the meet today. Anyway could you uh tell Kaa-san that I'll join you guys in like 5 minutes?"_

_Karin narrowed her deep brown eyes "Are you sure?"_

_A particular high-pitched moan nearly gave Ichigo a nosebleed. _

_No he wasn't a pervert he was an average hormonal teenage boy-he couldn't help it if he tried. Though he forced himself to smile at his younger sister and ignore the two shameless whores on the other end, "I'm fine Karin, honest. We just uh got to find someone to replace me on the field since you know today is the championship and all."_

_Although Karin didn't look the least bit convinced she let it drop and turned to leave but not before adding, "I'll tell Kaa-chan that you're going to ride with Ganju and Kaien instead."_

"_Thanks, Karin."_

"_Anytime Ichi-nii."_

_The girl shut the door softly behind her and Ichigo brought the phone up to his ear once more._

"_**Aww ain't that sweet? Even your lil' sis is covering for you."**_

_Ichigo glared at the framed picture sitting on top of his dresser and snarled into the phone "Shut up you bastard! Don't talk about my sister!"_

"_**My aren't we a bit touchy today, heh want me to ask Aa-chan if she'd be willing t-**_

"_HELL NO!" Ichigo cut Grimmjow off having no desire whatsoever to hear his rival finish that sentence. "Listen bottom line is I have a wedding to go to so-_

"_**So?" **_

"_So the wedding takes place at the same time as the meet-_

"_**And?"**_

"_Well obviously I can't be in two places as once so I was hoping you wou-_

"_**You're hoping I would what exactly? Go out and buy and orange wig and pretend to be Karakura's favorite golden runner?"**_

"_No! And don't call me that!"_

_**A snort, "Whatever you say strawberry princess-listen if I agree to do this and that's a very big IF not quite as big as my d-**_

_Ichigo ignored how his face continued to burn hotly with more than just anger and snapped out, "I don't care to hear about your gigantic Canadian penis Grimmjow! Just get over your own ego for one day and do something for the good of the team."_

"_**Heh, good of the team? Don't you mean good for **__**you**__** cause that's what it is right a favor for you. You're expectin' me to bring the team to victory while you dance the day away with Cunt-erella and her fairy god daughter."**_

_THE FUCK?_

"_I'm not dancing at all asshole! I-argggg Grimmjow I wouldn't have called you if I knew you were going to be such a jackass about all of this-_

"_**WRONG! You secretly love the fact that I'm a jackass-fact it gets you all hot and bothered don't Kurosaki?"**_

_**To a certain degree yes this was true however-**_

"_SHUT THE HELL UP! I don't have time for this."_

"_**Aww you're breaking my heart princess."**_

"_I'll do more than break your heart I'll break your-_

"_**Ah uhn careful now don't say something nasty or I might just have to hang up on you."**_

_Ichigo cursed inwardly and outwardly. Then released a tiered sigh__**, "**__Alright Grimmjow bullshit aside what will it take for me to convince you to go to the meet and win one for the team?"_

"_**What will it take hmm? Now that is a very good question…"**_

_Ichigo rolled his eyes easily picturing what his rival was doing right then. Bastard was probably sitting up in his king size bed with a wild and lecherous grin on his face-most likely rubbing his hairless sharp pointed chin as he thought of ways in which he could be repaid- nothing but a thin bed sheet concealing the bottom half of his well sculpted b-Ichigo shook his head-Damn gutter brain!_

"_**A favor from me sure as hell won't come cheap."**_

_Ichigo knew he would probably regret it later but he didn't have time think about that when time was wasting. He released another sigh, "Name your price."_

"_**My price?" Dramatic pause "…Shave all the hair on your body including your brows."**_

_Wow. Well that was…unexpected…Ichigo had been expecting something much, much worse-not that he was tickled pink with the idea of being completely hairless but-_

"_When?"_

"_**When you ask?" Another pause and Ichigo guessed his rival was probably pulling out a cigarette and a lighter, "Next Saturday since you're all tied up today and all."**_

_Shit! Well a deal was a deal._

"_Fine."_

"_**Not so fast to make sure you don't go out and buy a costume bald cap or something you're going to shave your hair off at my house. Gramps is over seas so it'll just be the two of us."**_

_Ichigo touched his unruly orange locks subconsciously and let out a final sigh, "Got it. I'll be there. Now you get your ass over to the track meet."_

"_**Are you really going to be okay with this, princess?"**_

_Feeling his mild irritation shift into full on annoyance once more Ichigo barked out, "It s just hair!" Even though it was more than just hair. "It'll grow back-you just keep up your end of the deal and I'll keep up mine."_

"_**Shame-such a shame."**_

_**What the hell was Grimmjow going on about now?**_

"_Arggh whatever I'm hanging up."_

_And Ichigo did. Throwing his cell phone a good few feet away from him and on to the carpet-he had no intention of taking it with him. _

_Just as he started making his way downstairs the phone went off and against his better judgment/sanity Ichigo raced to pick it up. _

"_Hello?"_

"_**Bad manners strawberry princess, you didn't even say good bye or wish me luck!"**_

_Eye roll. "Good luck and thanks."_

_Maybe Ichigo wouldn't have to shave his hair if he made it to the stadium before the race ended-it was a nice maybe to consider._

_()()_

_Perhaps it was the wedding bells-maybe it was the love doves or the violins-Ichigo did not know what the reason for his sudden little day dream scenario but once it surfaced there was nothing left for him to do but let it play out. _

_**First he pictured himself in the grooms' shoes, waiting at the alter with bated breath, family and friends all around him beaming with pride and joy. His best man, Chado or maybe Renji no Chado no Renji-ah fuck it-fuck clichés and tradition since he couldn't choose between his best buds he would give Rukia the title as best woman. Yes that was the best choice.**_

_**As for the bride herself-with or without the veil she had no distinct features, eye color, hair color- neither tall or short, flat chested or big breasted-more of a shadow figure with a feminine shape really-reason for this he wasn't quite sure who is ideal dream girl/bride would be. **_

_**Well okay that wasn't entirely true for it would be all too easy to put a face on the bride-give her an identity-a little softer-more lynx like than panther-eyes still as striking as ever but perhaps a little wider-skin a shade paler-mouth a shade darker-bottom lip a little fuller-yes it would be all too easy to create the female version of Grimmjow-all too easy to-**_

_NO! It would be best for Ichigo to snap the hell out of it-stop spacing out and focus on the real wedding-yes yes focus!_

_()_

_Ichigo wasn't sure whether to laugh or not when Kaien and Ganju sobbed as Kukaku exchanged her vows with the groom. Who the groom was? No one knew. It was a total and complete mystery-the bottom half of the "man's" face was shrouded by a long silky scarf and rather than donning a tux or formal robes he was wearing (Ichigo raised a brow) a monk's cloak?_

_Since when do monks marry?_

_Never mind he was better off not knowing. _

_The groom (although a little strange) wasn't bad looking from what little bit that Ichigo could see-long flowing deep purple locks, slanted golden eyes-smooth desert kissed mocha toned skin. His fingers were slimmer than Kukaku's, Ichigo briefly noted, before he fell into yet another dream daze of sorts._

_**Only this time there was no mystery-question or doubt. No denying who he was standing next to at the alter-rather than being the groom he was the bride-a happy blushing bride, which was just fine-made more sense to Ichigo in the long wrong (not that he'd share this with anyone-not a chance in hell!) **_

_**But yes he was a blushing bride all decked out in sparkly open toed heels and a hot pink wedding dress-wait a damn minute here! PINK? Why the hell in the privacy of his own overactive imagination was he wearing pink of all things? **_

"_**Think about it princess do I look like the kinda guy who would tie myself down to an unripened berry?"**_

_**In short…it just wasn't fair. That the groom, that Grimmjow could look way too damn good in a white leather jacket, cheetah printed dress shirt and black slacks-at the moment even though Ichigo had no one but his own bizarre "brain" to blame the urge to punch the other was stronger than ever-**_

_**And of course the bastard was all Cheshire cat grin and blazing eyes-humiliating the shit out of Ichigo was Grimmjow's favorite past time after all.**_

"_**No scowling strawberry princess, this is supposed to be the happiest day of your life."**_

_**Tch. Yeah right. My ass.**_

_**But of course Ichigo-in-a-dress could not say such foul things so he simply stomped on his grooms' foot with the heel of his stiletto.**_

_**In retaliation said groom did the not quite unexpected…**_

"_**Bastard! Did you really just grab my ass?" A low hiss since they were in a sacred house and all.**_

_**Wide smirk and a leer, "I'll be grabbing a hell of a lot more once I carry you over the threshold princess," electric blues flashing wildly, "Unless you'd rather I just take you right in the limo."**_

_**WTF?**_

_**Seriously Ichigo has had some realistic daydreams but this was just…it took the cake…no pun intended.**_

"_**I now pronounce you married. Hurry up and seal it with a kiss its almost sake hour."**_

_**Only in a dream…only in a bizarre daydream would the minister be a drunk-**_

_The loud applause pulled Ichigo back to reality. He stood up and clapped along with the rest of the wedding party._

_()()_

"_You keep glancing at your watch. What, you got somewhere to be?"_

_Ichigo had been forcing himself to eat the last bite of the uber sugary wedding cake when Kukaku's shadow fell over him. He swallowed, lifted his head and looked the woman in the eye, an easy lie rolling off his tongue, "No I was just glancing at my watch because I heard it might rain."_

"_You heard it might rain did you?"_

_When his aunt smiled it usually wasn't a good sign._

_Ichigo did not let his sudden uneasiness show on his face. "Yeah."_

_There was a pause and then…_

"_DON'T LIE TO ME! YOU SUCK AT LYING! I'VE TOLD YOU SEVERAL TIMES BEFORE HAVEN'T I?"_

_The vein above Kukaku's brow was throbbing. Definitely not a good sign-not at all. Ichigo braced himself for the whomping of the century. _

_But it never came; instead Kukaku smiled down at him and ruffled his hair. "Get out of here brat, before I change my mind."_

_()()_

_By the time Ichigo arrived a the stadium the race was almost over-Grimmjow was just split seconds away from the finish line-the leading track star from the rival school not far behind. Not because the other guy was on par with his rival but more so because Grimmjow simply didn't care enough to go all out and give his best. In other words he was only running at half speed for Ichigo knew better than anyone that other youth was much faster. Ah well…least he kept his promise and was going to win won for the team. For this Ichigo could be happy._

_Rather than rushing over to his coach and the rest of his teammates and apologize profusely Ichigo took a moment a moment to just admire Grimmjow from a spectators view point-took a moment to watch each and every muscle-watch each and every single bead of sweat roll down the other boys' sharp angle and-_

_Actually that wasn't such a good idea-yes no it would be much better for Ichigo to look away before a cherry fountain sprayed out of his nose-_

_In less than a blink the race was over and the very same guy that Ichigo had not-so-subtly been drooling over was in his face, making him chuck all abnormal thoughts from his mind and grin._

"_You're late Kurosaki."_

_Ichigo tossed Grimmjow a towel and grinned even wide, "Better late than never, right?"_

_**FLASHBACK END**_

_**()()**_

"Where the hell does one begin? Well without coming off like a complete and total idiot that is-" there was a momentary break while Grimmjow fished in the back pocket of his pants.

"What is he doing?"

"Looks like he's going to read or recite something."

"Okay I gathered that much. But why?"

"Shhh…This is a rare moment and all of you owe it to Ichigo to keep quiet."

"But Masaki-san he's-

"Shhh!"

Ichigo as per usual didn't really understand what was going on. Had no clue as to why his mother was hushing all of his friends-why eyes very much like his own yet volumes different were shining with mischief-as if the woman were saying 'I know something you don't know.'

It wasn't out of character per se but…with one eye still trained on Grimmjow, Ichigo turned to address his mother, "Kaa-san is there something you're not telling me?"

She smiled, a smile that Ichigo knew and loved all too much, "Trust me its better if I don't tell you. The element of surprise is key after all."

Orange brows furrowed. Element of surprise? What exactly was Grimmjow planning to do?

"**Punch. Drunk. Love. Well neither of us was drunk at the time but plenty of punches were thrown and as for the L word it was just that and nothing more. We were hormonal teenage guys what the hell did we know about love?**

**And even on the rare occasion when we weren't at each other's throats I spent more time wanting to strangle you than anything else. Truth of the matter was you were an eyesore-an annoying little buzzard that wouldn't shut up-an itch that I couldn't quite scratch-not like I didn't try! Blood under my fingernails-image of your face burned into my brain-defeated-depressed-triumphant-thoughtful-clueless-cocky.**

**Bruises under my clothing-some self inflicted-some not. Toss and turn-toss and turn-the damn clock won't stop its tic-tic-ticking. I shut my eyes and there you were. I open my eyes and there you were. This I guy-this strange guy that I had absolutely nothing in common with and yet at the same time was exactly as me.**

Free verse poetry? Not exactly-Ichigo wasn't sure what to call whatever Grimmjow was doing-but it wasn't just a growling ramble0there was emotion both in the tone of his voice and on his face-it was a lot to take in and even though it was…odd Ichigo was anxious to hear more-Grimmjow did not disappoint.

"**Ying Yang. Fire. Water. Light VS Shadow. Shadow Vs Light. They said I should seek help. Find someone to cure me. I'm a stubborn bastard-always been a stubborn bastard-insisted everything was fine-I didn't need their damn help! Love. Hate. The thinnest of lines. Like a festering wound that grows and grows and never clogs no matter how much bandages and gauze you apply.**

**Like a never ending whirlwind or tidal wave-you get swept up and dragged away-carried out to sea-you're drowning-you're dying and-AH FUCK IT! Like hell I need a bunch of cliff notes to tell you how I feel. You know reciting love sonnets and quoting verses and crap ain't my style so why bother?"**

That said Grimmjow ripped the note cards up in to teeny tiny pieces and sprinkled them like confetti on the stage, then he loosened his already loose tie and gripped the mirocphone more firmly-

Lashes fell over electric blues and then snapped open-blazing-searing their way into Ichigo's soul, Grimmjow's Cheshire ct like grin back in place-

"You know I hate repeating myself so listen and listen good, Kurosaki," dramatic pause…

Ichigo counted it lasted a whole 5 minutes-

"**As I stand before you on this night under the cheap fluorescent lights with a mic in one hand and flowers in the other-I know you woulda preferred daffodils or lilacs because that's the kinda guy you are but it's the gesture that counts-you're the one who taught me this Kurosaki. **

**The past. The present. The future. It all traces back to you-only ****YOU ****can give me a hard on the size of rocket and balls bluer than the ocean and the sky combined just by looking at me with that dumbfounded expression."**

WTF?

Hold the fuck up. Slow the fuck down and Rewind!

**Play again.**

Grimmjow did not really. This over-coiffed-overconfident-sexy bastard did not really just say that out loud?

Ichigp pinched himself hoping/praying it was another stupid dream daze-slapped his hand over his face when he realized this was in fact REALITY.

Grimmjow was indeed on stage spouting embarrassing ass shit-grinning wider than ever-Ichigo's family and friends were indeed seated next to him the grand hall-this was in fact his coming out party and-

OMG!

Speaking freely and opening was one thing but this? For heaven-sakes there were-Ichigo felt like banging his head on the table and fleeing to the nearest exit at the same time.

"Oh my he certainly has a way with words."

That was putting it way too damn lightly.

Ichigo glanced over at his mother. He couldn't believe she was so…so calm. Grimmjow had basically just…Ichigo couldn't even repeat it in his own head.

He glanced over at his moronic gather thinking surely the man would be bawling his fists-that his goat like face would be red with anger and he marched towards the stage and pummeled his former rival into next season.

But Isshin proved to be as useless as ever a he chuckled and clinked glasses with Masaki, " I might just warm up to this kid after all."

What the hell did that mean?

Ichigo shook his head. He could worry about it later.

Uproaring almost deafening laughter filled the entire hall a few minutes later-even Byakuya-stone faced pinstripe suit-fancy law attorney Byakuya had a slight smirk on his face.

"Hmm seems that night wasn't a total waste after all."

Ichigo craned his neck around so fast he was sure he must have pulled a muscle. Rukia made the comment in between the several glasses of sherry she was guzzling-Inoue, who was resting her head in the shorter womans' lap hummed in content.

Night? What night?

What the hell. Nevermind. Ichigo needed to focus. He needed to-rescue his sisters. Poor Karin and Yuzu never should have been subjected to hearing such trash.

He scanned the hall searching for his twin sisters and their respected boyfriends. Hanatarou was four shades crimson and trying in vain to cover both Yuzu's and his own ears-not an easy task. Toshiro was whispering something in Karin's ear-clearing trying to distract her. Ichigo was grateful but it wasn't enough.

And so he signaled to Toshiro and once he had the snow-haired teens' attention he mouthed the words _"Take Karin and Yuzu home."_

Toshiro nodded and Ichigo breathed a sigh of relief as the two young couples quietly but quickly made their exit.

Next order of business. Kick Grimmjow's ass off the stage before he spouted more embarrassing ass shit!

Sadly for Ichigo plans hardly ever went the way he intended to-

"Easy pet the party's almost over and ya haven't even said hello."

Ichigo didn't want to be rude especially since Nnoitra hadn't done anything to him but he wans't in the mood to be petted like some animal in a zoo. And so calmly, carefully he took his hand back and politely turned the other man down. "Sorry but I'm not interested-Shiro's around here though and he's always ready to play."

Nnoitra frowned, "Ya disappointment pet and here I even put on a dress shirt just for the occasion and all."

"Sorry."

Although Ichigo wasn't sorry at all. He hadn't promised this man anything. Didn't owe him anything no matter what Shiro or Ulquiorra might had said.

Mismatched eyes studied him for a moment. "I don't believe ya but no sense in chasin' someone who don't wish ta be chased."

Ichigo didn't really know how to respond so he said nothing further.

"If ya should change ya mind-come find me at the Hueco Plaza Hotel and Casino."Nnoitra took his leave but not before grabbing Ichigo's ass.

That out of the way Ichigo could re-focus his attention back on Grimmjow. He still had each and every intention to-

"_**Are you really that desperate for attention these days or are you just trying to piss me off, Kurosaki?"**_

()()

TBC


	18. Chapter TEN

**Disclaimer: Kubo-sensei, Kubo-sensei the amazing mangaka-tier!**

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, WIP, Language, Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling, warring emotions, etc…

**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**

Chapter 10

()()

(Grimmjow)

The speech had been better received than Grimmjow thought it might. He knew going in to it that he was taking a bit of a risk being completely uncensored and all but it was something that had always come natural to him.

So yeah Grimmjow could consider this moment to be a win even though his berry looked beyond furious and embarrassed.

Understandable if Grimmjow were in Kurosaki's shoes he'd probably feel embarrassed too.

The only thing left to do now was apologize.

That part would be a little more difficult. Grimmjow didn't really fancy admitting his past faults in front of a crowd. So yeah it was time to get off stage, grab Kurosaki and drag the other male to a more secluded location.

Simple enough except Kurosaki apparently wanted no further part in this night and was quickly hightailing it to the exit.

'_**Heh so you wanna play this game do ya Kurosaki?'**_

Electric blues narrowed to sharp pointed slits and Grimmjow mentally mapped out the quickest route to his strawberry on the run.

Well okay the guy wasn't actually running-hell he wasn't even jogging but details, minor insignificant details. Fast or slow an escape/retreat was an escape retreat-that's all.

Or not all. Who the fuck was the spindly overgrown bastard preying on his strawberry princess? What right did this wide mouthed fucktard have to grab his rival like that?

Grimmjow didn't come to the Drunken Seahorse looking to pick a fight but if Kurosaki thought he was just going to stand by and watch, the berry was gravely mistaken.

()()

(Ichigo)

"Are you really that desperate for attention these days or are you just trying to piss me off, Kurosaki?"

Ichigo jumped. As always someone up in the heavens was laughing at him. How did? When did-? Although Grimmjow was multitalented how did he always manage to-?

Ichigo whirled around and glared up at his rival for the first time in years. He was too worked up to properly appreciate how even more delicious the blue-haired half Canadian had become.

"Piss you off? Piss you off!" Brown eyes flashed furiously and the berry snarled out, "What the hell was up with that speech just now you asshole? Haven't you heard of tact? Haven't you heard of argghhh-"?

Ichigo angrily raked a hand through his heavily gelled hair "Forget I-I don't even have the energy to fight you Grimmjow."

Not exactly true. If Ichigo truly desired to inflict bodily harm on the other man he could do so.

Fact of the matter was he didn't want to because even though almost every single word Grimmjow had spoken on stage was highly inappropriate there was a hidden message/meaning in between each line and Ichigo would have to be a damn fool to ignore it.

Feeling his anger subside once he thought things through logically Ichigo willed himself to crack a grin "Bastard, took you long enough." –'_**Another hour and I might have just taken one of these guys up on their offer.'**_

Of course the berry wouldn't voice that last part out loud. Last thing he wanted to do was cause unnecessary drama.

Ichigo wanted to move forward with his rival. Giving the other a reason to be jealous wouldn't be a smart route to take.

"I like your tie."

I like your tie? Seriously? That was the best he could come up?

Ichigo wanted to slap himself but refrained and added teasingly, "-Though I'd never thought the day would come when you'd willing wear sequins."

Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his jaw.

Ichigo felt his grin widen. Ah just like ole' times.

"Wasn't my idea or my first choice, believe me."

"Believe you? Should I?"

Sort of a loaded question but Ichigo didn't want the other man to think for one second that their long and complicated history could be brushed under the rug just like that.

"Have I given you a reason not to trust me Kurosaki?"

"Well yeah actually you have but-

Ichigo trailed off suddenly feeling like an idiot. Well a bigger idiot than he already felt like. Yes he and Grimmjow had things to discuss-many thing but couldn't he just pretend for 15 minutes or so that he was happy to see his rival?

Couldn't he just admit that he was both equally flattered and embarrassed by Grimmjow's comments?

It wasn't that simple. It never was.

"You've given me plenty of reasons to never trust you again but I'm uh I'd like to move past it."

A non-committal shrug was Grimmjow's way of response.

Typical. And infuriating as all hell. Damn him.

"The ball is in your court, strawberry princess," Another shrug, "I said my piece so where things go from here is entirely up to you."

Yes he was irritated but yet at the same time Ichigo couldn't blame Grimmjow for being well…Grimmjow.

Giving that speech in front of a room full of people-pouring his heart out must have been…

()()

(Grimmjow)

Telling Kurosaki that the ball was in court-that everything that happened from here on out was entirely up to the strawberry princess-that he would happily go along with whatever his rival decided no questions-no protests-wasn't entirely true.

Truth was there was still a hell of a lot more Grimmjow wished to tell the orange-haired male. A lot more he NEEDED to say. But he wasn't going to bleed his heart-lay his soul bare without getting something in return.

Grimmjow needed to know that he wasn't the only one still harboring feelings.

Baring what Kuchiki, Masaki and several others had claimed, it wasn't enough for Grimmjow. He wanted-needed to hear the words pass from Kurosaki's peach ripened pouty lips.

The very same lips Grimmjow had wished and dreamt of kissing and suckling day in and day out. The same lips he had secretly vowed to claim before this night drew to a close.

Grimmjow needed to know for a fact that Kurosaki felt something more-something much greater than lust blended with disgust and regret for him.

He wouldn't-refused to let anyone make a full out of him-that included his strawberry princess-no especially his strawberry princess.

Kurosaki wasn't speechless exactly more like the other man was trying to figure out what he wished to say next.

Tempting, as it would be to taunt/demand it out of the other-old habits did die-hard after all-Grimmjow would do his best to be patient. Do his best not to push to hard for that would only irritate the berry more.

However long it might take didn't matter…he was no leaving until something changed.

Thankfully Kurosaki wasn't cruel. Then again the guy never had been.

Orange lashes partially shielded expressive brown eyes from view, Kurosaki spoke above a whisper, "Did you mean what you said up there?"

Fair question? Yeah it was but at the same time…

If Kurosaki was going to doubt him at this stage in the game-after their complex history then Grimmjow was going to give back as good as he got.

Counter the question with a question of his own "You tell me ask yourself Kurosaki, would I really go through all of this (he gestured to his disheveled appearance) and make an ass of myself on stage if this was just some joke?"

Yes Grimmjow did let some bite slip into his tone.

Couldn't help it if he tried. Even now Kurosaki got his blood boiling like no other. And truthfully the other male hadn't even really said or done anything.

That was part of the problem.

If they could kindly move past the bullshit and drama and move forward and on to the next step-a better step-that would be fucking grand.

Grimmjow wouldn't expect sex on the rooftop or anything crazy and wild off the bat but how about a kiss or a long-lasting groping session?

He wouldn't be picky. He would try his best to keep it in his pants and not ask or demand anything that the other male was not ready or willing to give.

Grimmjow felt his chest tighten as his rival locked eyes with him for the third time that night.

Kurosaki moved his mouth but no official sounds or words made it past his lips.

Grimmjow didn't notice it before what with being all in a love/lust daze and all but now-now during this moment of silence he noticed that his strawberry wasn't the same guy he knew back in high school. The other male had-

"You've changed."

Kurosaki was no longer an open book.

In the past Grimmjow could just take note of the way his rivals' muscles twitched or the way his thin orange brows furrowed or the way his eyes blazed and could pretty much be able to figure out what the strawberry was thinking/feeling but now-

Now that wasn't the case.

()()

(Ichigo)

Changed? It was said in a low murmur barely above a whisper but with less than a good foot of space between them Ichigo had heard Grimmjow crystal clear.

Yes he supposed he had changed but then again so had Grimmjow.

_**When the hell had that happened?**_

()()

(Grimmjow)

Almost as though something or someone had flipped his switch, Kurosaki's guarded stance shifted into a more relaxed one.

Grimmjow chose to interpret the change as a sign of good things to come.

Kurosaki's lips moved again but still not a single sound or sentence passed. Perhaps, Grimmjow reasoned, the strawberry princess was lost in a jungle of thoughts?

Grimmjow could relate for he thoughts were also spinning wildly.

What the past and present could spell for their future was yet to be determined.

Dare he open a can of worms and bring up the past? Dare Grimmjow suggest that he and Kurosaki should explore and discuss their memories together?

It was like asking himself: _**Should I willingly jump into a tank filled with hungry sharks?**_

The answer was a big fat NO.

But being logical was kind of overrated and playing it safe was just too effing boring for words and when it came to Kurosaki and matters of the heart well…logic might as well have been a second language to Grimmjow.

"So Kurosaki I think we should-

"Why Renji?"

Grimmjow blinked. Suddenly he lost complete track of what he had wished to ask the other as Kurosaki beat him to it and fired off his own question.

A question that Grimmjow had been expecting sooner rather than later but had been holding on to the hope that it would be much later.

_**Damn it Kurosaki! Of all the things do you really have to bring of the Abarai thing first?**_

Grimmjow felt like punching his fist through another wall but he didn't think that would go over to well with Kurosaki or the owners of the Drunken Seahorse.

So he opted to say nothing.

"…"

Not that it had any real affect because Kurosaki continued on, this time his voice rose in volume, "You could have had," clenching fist, furrowed brow, gnawing on lips.

"You could have had anyone-hell you did have anyone and everyone whenever and whenever you wanted to so why-? Voice cracking, eyes not quite welling up with tears but definitely near it, "Why did you have you have to go and pick Renji?"

Fuck. There really was no way of getting out of this was there?

"Why him you ask?"

_**Play it casual. Perhaps Kurosaki will grow bored with pointless questions. And it was pretty pointless since the whole episode with Abarai was all of Szayel's fucking doing in the first place anyway!**_

Not that it necessarily made it better but-

"Yes, why him?"

Kurosaki suddenly sounded like he had the wind knocked out of him or something, he sounded like a wounded pip-it was pathetic-it was painful-it was…Grimmjow wasn't sure he could stand another minute of it.

But he had to.

If he wanted to live out happily ever after with his number one rival then he had to start somewhere.

Kurosaki let out a sigh, sounding like a cross between aggravated and anxious/desperate.

He raked his hand through his orange locks a second time and for a moment-just for a moment but a disturbing moment it looked like he might actually be trying to rip some chunks of it out.

Luckily he managed to calm down after taking a few measured and deep breaths.

"Grimmjow," he tried again "Before we-before I can-before I tell you anything I need to understand."

Pleading. Begging. Yes begging for an answer-for an explanation. If this continued to drag out the damn fool probably wouldn't be able to fight back his angry tears anymore.

Tears. Ugh. Just the thought. Grimmjow couldn't really stomach the sight of Kurosaki's tears.

()()

Cigarette. He needed a cigarette. And he figured his rival could probably use some fresh air. "Let's continue this outside Kurosaki."

It wasn't a request. But it wasn't a demand either. And the two were no longer teenagers but adults.

Grimmjow felt pretty damn confident that Kurosaki wouldn't try to fight him on this.

"Answer my question and then I'll go anywhere you want to go."

Then again.

**FUCK MY LIFE SERIOUSLY!**

Stubborn bastard. Ah well Grimmjow wouldn't have his strawberry princess any other way.

"Why should I answer your question when you haven't even answered any of mine, eh **Ichigo?"**

"Wha-What did you just-?

Kurosaki blinked once. Twice. Three times. "Did you jus-?" Orange brows furrowed together and if Grimmjow had known that his rival would look so damn delicious when he was uber baffled (which was ten leaps up from his regular baffled expression) then he would have called the other male by his first name a long time ago.

Nah probably not since he got a kick out of pissing the berry off.

Cheshire like cat grin firmly in place, "Don't act so shocked princess after all who better to you call you by your first name than me? Sides a lot of time has passed and we both matured so I figured I might as well-

And suddenly or not quite suddenly Kurosaki was reaching for his neck and Grimmjow grinned and teased "Hey now what's this you're not gonna get much out of me when you're trying to strangle m-mmmph!

'_**Heh that's pretty nice.'**_

TBC


	19. Chapter ELEVEN

**Disclaimer: The year is 2013 which means its time for more Grimm and Berry. As well as time to announce the obvious…I still am not nor shall I ever be Kubo-sensei!**

A/N I've been doing a lot of reading lately hence the lack of writing updates …anyway the good thing is all the reading put SLY back in the writing groove. I'm baaaaack!

THANK YOU TO ALL WHO ARE STILL SUPPORTING THE RANDOM NESS THAT IS DRUNKEN SEAHORSE!

**Warnings: GRIMMxICHI, AU, OOC-ness, spelling, grammar, punctuation, emotions, , flashbacks, many pairings, eventual citrus treats etc.**

_DRUNKEN SEAHORSE_

**CHAPTER 11**

**()()**

(Grimmjow)

And suddenly or not quite suddenly Kurosaki was reaching for his neck and Grimmjow grinned and teased "Hey now what's this you're not gonna get much out of me when you're trying to strangle m-mmmph!

_**'Heh that's pretty nice.'**_

Kurosaki had made it crystal clear he was not a fan of PDA and never would be. Yet here they were heavily entwined in front of hundreds of people and his berry was anything but shy.

It was just another reminder that things had changed-back in high school his rival would have never put the moves on him-especially not with hundreds of witnesses in the room.

FLASHBACK

(_**School boys)**_

_After several restless night of tossing and turning. Thoughts of a certain orange-haired rival dominating his every thought, Grimmjow decided that enough was enough! _

_This had to stop. Kurosaki had to…well not die because then he'd miss the bastard too much. But Kurosaki had to go-flee-leave his mind forevermore._

_Or at least until Grimmjow got a better hold on his shitty and tiresome teenage hormones._

_The only real way to get the strawberry princess out of his system was by making sure he had his fill. SSD. Sample. Savor. Discard. Grimmjow's new theory-the surefire method that would not fail._

_Szayel and Ilfort didn't share his confidence in the plan-the duo said as much when Grimmjow brought it up the following day inside the cafeteria at lunch. _

"_Get serious Grimmjow, its not going to work," Szayel wiped a grease stain off of his designer lenses and continued, "It won't solve anything. The only thing you'll accomplish with this asinine plan of yours is a black eye and one seriously pissed off strawberry princess."_

_Grimmjow snarled and smacked Szayel up side his pink-head "Don't call him that! Only I can call him that."_

_Szayel snorted and then smoothed out his hair._

_Electric blues rolled at the diva like behavior and Grimmjow turned to Ilfort, thinking surely the blond Grantz would back him on his plan._

_Ilfort was, as always, fiddling around with his phone and hadn't so much as bothered to even touch his meatball sandwich or cheesy fries. But he wasn't entirely useless. Once Grimmjow kicked the other teen's chair, the blond had plenty to say._

"_Why don't you just give up the ship and go and write Kurosaki a love sonnet or something because quite honestly your obsession is getting way out of hand and I'm tiered of hearing about it."_

_Grimmjow narrowed his eyes at the blond, not that Ilfort was even paying attention anymore-shitty bastard._

"_Don't take it personally Grimmjow, he's just sour about his own non-existent relationship with lil' Miss Miyu."_

_Miss Miyu? Grimmjow shuddered at the thought of the zombie like looking goth girl in English lit. "What the hell does he see in that?"_

_Szayel shrugged and reached across the table, stealing a handful of fries from his disinterested twin. "Haven't the slightest idea but let's get back to you and this moronic plan of yours shall we?" A grin._

"_It's not moronic," Grimmjow sneered before snatching up the rest of Ilfort's fries. "It's gonna work, just wait and see."_

"_Hmm," Szayel hummed and then took a few sips from his pineapple juice._

_Grimmjow chucked the wrapping that had previously contained a king size sub in the garbage and stood up. He had five minutes before the next bell. Just enough time for a quick smoke._

"_You leaving?" Szayel asked more out of habit not because the guy actually gave a damn one way or another._

_Grimmjow zipped up his leather jacket "Yeah," and left the lunchroom._

_()()_

_As the day rolled on and it neared closer and closer to show time Grimmjow felt his excitement sky rocket and practically skipped his way to gym class-in a totally non-gay completely uber MASCULINE way of course._

_Riiiight._

_()_

_Whistling a tuneless song wasn't really Grimmjow's style-well whistling in general wasn't really his style but he didn't really care about what or what wasn't his style at the moment._

_The locker room was more or less deserted save Kurosaki and that pencil neck class president Ishida. But it seemed like the spectacled youth was far more interested in his sewing than anything the orange haired teen was talking about._

_Only the briefest of nods, the occasional hmm or random brow lift showed Ishida was even paying attention._

_Kurosaki apparently was used to the dark-haired teen's behavior, since he continued on with the one-sided conversation with little break in between._

_The two (or Kurosaki rather) was talking about some sort of strange and embarrassing incident that had recently occurred with the big breasted head-cheerleader-something about a lodge cabin and a power outage and-truthfully Grimmjow didn't give enough of a damn to pay attention to the details. _

_Far as he was concerned the princess proved to be about just as much of an eyesore as that lil' raven bitch Kuchiki._

_He fiddled with his combination lock for a good few minutes, giving it a good solid pinch because it usually refused to budge on the first pull and pulled out his gym clothes and sat down on the bench, back turned but ears perked._

_At that exact moment Kurosaki stopped mid-sentence and Grimmjow used the opportunity to start whistling again. _

_He could only imagination the irritated expression on his rivals' face as the other snapped out a _

"_Yes Grimmjow we know you're here, the question is what do you want?"_

_Grimmjow grinned but did not answer right away. Instead he continued whistling and pulled his t-shirt up and over his head, fiddled with the belt on his pants and acted as though he didn't have a care in the world._

_He imagined the berry was probably torn between glaring and gawking at his naked back-poor bastard._

"_Just ignore him Kurosaki, he's not worth it."_

_Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his fists, half wishing to wring the bespectacled class president by his neck, squeeze and squeeze until it turned a lovely shade of purple. _

_Not that Kurosaki would let him get that far if he did attempt to choke Ishida._

"_Kurosaki!"_

"_Yeah, I know, I know already get off my back Ishida."-the 'I can handle myself' was left unsaid._

_The sound of a zipper being opened or closed followed and then, "I shouldn't even waste my breath on pointlessly lecturing you because you never listen to me," a sigh, "Honestly it still baffles me."_

"_What still baffles you?'_

"_I-nothing, never mind look we should have been outside on the field with the others 20 minutes ago." Another sound of zipper being opened or closed "What is taking you so long anyway Kurosaki?"_

"_Nothing!"_

_It was said much too quickly-rushed-hurried-almost defensive. "I mean I'm not taking THAT long-you-you're just always in a rush to go everywhere."_

"_Being on time is the key to any successful man's future. Perhaps you should start now." Ishida recited_

"_Thanks for the tip Ishida, really we should have these heart to hearts more often."_

_Ah sarcasm. The strawberry was getting better and better at it with each passing day._

"_Suit yourself Kurosaki, do what you want. Come to class or don't come to class. One day you'll wake up and realize it soon enough." _

_Closing of a locker door, slight squeaking of tennis shoes, a muttered curse. _

"_Don't forget that dinner is at 8 o' clock sharp and although I don't expect you to show up wearing an actual suit, I do hope you can find something more appropriate to wear rather than jeans and a fitted tee."_

_A sigh. This one definitely aggravated/impatient "Are you finished Ishida or do you plan on giving me tips on how to style my hair too?"_

_A scoff, "Let's not be thick Kurosaki, hair like yours is impossible to style."_

_And with that Ishida left._

_Perfect. Showtime!_

_Grimmjow turned back around "So got a hot date tonight with the class president eh Kurosaki?"_

_As if on cue (really sometimes Grimmjow couldn't get over just how predictable the other teen was) Kurosaki looked over at him with a raised brow, the small vein in his neck twitching the slightest bit. "Not that's its really any of your business but my family is joining his family for dinner tonight, yes."_

'_**The hell it ain't! Everything is my business.'**_

_Grimmjow wasn't going to voice his inner growls out loud-why ruin the good mood he was in._

"_You?"_

"_Me what?"_

_An eye roll, "The correct response is 'I' not Me."_

"_Huh?"_

_Shaking of head, "Never mind, you're in a good mood anyone can see that." a pause _

"_You could say that princess."_

_Kurosaki scowled at the "princess" part but continued on, "I know I'm probably going to regret asking but what are you so happy about?"_

_It was a good question. Perfect question really. A wide grin split across Grimmjow's sharp features, "You'll find out all in good time, Kurosaki."_

_Kurosaki rolled his cinnamon and coffee colored orbs, muttered a low "whatever" and finished lacing up his shoes._

"_Oi Kurosaki!"_

"_What?" Not a hiss or a growl-no the other boy's tone was almost calm._

"_I've been thinking," Grimmjow began._

"_Thinking? About what?" Kurosaki's tone sounded a bit wary now. Good he should be wary._

_Grimmjow's grin widened even more. "About you."_

_He watched as the other boys' orange brows shot up so high they practically disappeared into his hairline. Watched as a rosy blush spread on his rivals' check. Did not miss the cough/squeak of "Me?!"_

_Too cute. Too damn cute. Oh if only Grimmjow could just fast forward and skip these damn teen years and jump right into adult hood, ask the berry out on a date._

_If only things had started out differently between Kurosaki and him-perhaps if he'd been more suave, more self-assured, acted less like a bi-polar jackass-_

_If only. If only. I only._

_Fuck this was pathetic. Grimmjow sneered at his own inner weakness. _

_Maybe this would work better if he moved closer-closed the distance between them._

_As if moving on autopilot Grimmjow was practically on top of his rival before either of them even realized what he was doing._

_Brown eyes blown wide open, with no place to go Kurosaki wound up backing himself up right into his owner locker, let loose another not-quite masculine squeak of "What the hell are you d-mmmph!"_

_Fingers pressed against the others lips-to silence-to shut out the protest-electric blues pinning brown_

_Grimmjow felt something all too familiar stirring in him but rather than beating it down-locking it up he welcomed it. _

_An all too perfect opportunity had presented itself and he be damned if he didn't take full advantage._

_Kurosaki continued to struggle of course-no doubt muffling curses as he glared fiercely_

"_Shhh, I'm about to thank you for making this so much easier for me."_

_Pinning his rival with larger, more muscular frame was nothing out of the ordinary exactly-but pressing his fingers to the others ridiculously soft lips with a firm but gentle pressure-this was something new._

_Ideally in a perfect world filled with butterflies and rainbows and gumballs and sparkling hearts, Kurosaki would only protest at first and then gradually give in._

_**It would start with a lick-that perfect pink tongue of his darting out of his equally perfect mouth-to lick-to taste Grimmjow's nicotine stained fingertips-in a perfect world a lick would became a slow dragging suck-a playful nibble-a suggestive hint for something more.**_

_Grimmjow had long since stopped believing in fairy tales. _

_A nice burst of crimson as sharp pearly whites pierced skin-course Kurosaki's bite was nothing compared to his bark-but effective all the same._

_Grimmjow jerked his finger back-ignoring how it throbbed-ignoring how dark red liquid dripped onto his white shoe laces-_

_Face flushed and wild eyed, Kurosaki wiped at his mouth roughly, shoved his uniform into his locker, zipped up his gym bag and fled._

()()

_**Present day**_

()

A part (very miniscule) part of Grimmjow felt a tinsy bit irked at the reminder that just 24 hours ago the berry had been sucking face with someone else-but it was fleeting.

And rather than sulk or growl or ruin the moment he decided to run with it.

Maybe there wouldn't have to be some long-winded explanation about his actions in the past after all.

He could give the other male the answers he was looking for/demanding with actions rather than words.

Kurosaki was eager for his tongue and Grimmjow wouldn't dream of ever denying his strawberry princess anything.

Especially not at this stage in the game.

()()

(Ichigo)

A reward. A reward for good behavior? Well that was one way to look at it. Another would be…

Ichigo had spent more than enough time scolding and lecturing himself. He was tiered of having to explain his actions-if Grimmjow didn't get it well then the other man would probably never get it.

Granted kissing his former rival would probably complicate rather than solve all the issues but…it was worth it. Definitely worth it!

Because kissing Grimmjow felt nothing short of perfect. A nicotine and saltwater taffy explosion in his mouth-then again the other man could have tasted like piss and Ichigo wouldn't have cared.

Ichigo made the first move and felt pretty damn proud of him self.

Plus the past had taught the berry a few things about his former rival-Grimmjow, was a man of action. He responded better with actions rather than words.

Yes it would be all too easy to get swept up-carried away-let his doubts and anger fade away-die out completely. It would be all too easy to drown him self in a sea full of half Canadian hotness.

Ichigo could let his fingers play with electric blue locks. Let his tongue dance along sharp chiseled cheekbones, press his entire body closer and…

But Ichigo couldn't let go completely because well for one thing they were still very much out in public and for two, there was still much to discuss.

And so Ichigo forced himself to come back down from his temporary trip to cloud nine and detached his mouth from Grimmjow's and let his hands fall back down to his side.

He ignored the urge to lick away the thin strand of saliva on Grimmjow's chin.

Ichigo felt his face grow warm just a little bit when it dawned on him a moment later-the kiss just now lacked a great deal of finesse.

Hell he might as well have been a Saint Bernard or something with the way he slobbered all over the other man.

Luckily, Grimmjow didn't seem to mind, that damn infamous Cheshire cat grin was firmly back in place as he half purred/half drawled out (something only he could pull off) "Well Kurosaki you've certainly worked up quite the appetite eh?"

If Ichigo were still a teenager back in high school he would have punched Grimmjow but…he was no longer a teenager.

Cinnamon and coffee brown eyes twinkled, "Something like that," and his tone took on a teasing lilt as he added, "Then again maybe I just thought you could use a little bit of moisture on those dry lips of yours."

Electric blues flashed and narrowed but Grimmjow was still grinning so Ichigo could tell the other was more so amused than anything else.

"Nice to see you've finally grown a pair."

An orange brow twitched, "Not that's its any of your business but I've been told I have a pretty nice pair."

"Is that so?"

Ichigo sucked in a sharp breath as Grimmjow closed the distance between them once again," a low seductive purr right at his ear, "What else have your gaggle of fan boys told you?"

Gaggle of fan boys? Who the hell said anything about fan boys?

A glare "Bastard I don't have any damn fan boys!"

An eye roll, "Fan boys? Fan girls? All the same damn thing really but whatever makes you sleep well at night, strawberry princess."

Arggh! What the hell was this? Why was Grimmjow suddenly acting such a total and complete dick all of a sudden?

After everything that had transpired up until this moment, had it really been some sort of lame joke after all?

Ichigo studied the sharp and chiseled features he never stopped loving and searched for answers to Grimmjow's sudden 180.

"Anyway Kurosaki if you're really all that concerned about what I think why don't you strip right here and now and I'll see for myself just how pretty your balls are."

WTF?

Ichigo felt heat rise to his face but determinedly stomped it down, he bawled his fists, his lips curling into a snarl, "You bast-!"

"Ah ah nuh uh princess, we're having a moment here. Why ruin the mood," blues eyes flashed with challenge, mischief and promise, "Show me yours and I'll show you mine."

Ichigo had never had a ball fetish before but he would only be lying to himself if he insisted that he wasn't the least bit curious about the Jeager-family jewels.

Still…now was not the time or place for such things!

"Stop fucking around Grimmjow! You know damn well I didn't mean it in that context."

A quirked brow, a sly smirk, "Really? Well then if sex isn't what you had in mind, why did you stick your tongue down my throat?"

It was a perfectly reasonable question.

"I-Because you-,"

Ichigo trailed off as Grimmjow touched the side of his face and purred out "Because I what, _Ichigo?"_

The second time around Ichigo heard his name pass Grimmjow's lips he nearly felt his knees buckle out from under him.

_Nearly_

Damn Grimmjow! Damn him and his stupid perfect inhuman purrs of seduction!

"I'm gonna make it real simple for you Kurosaki, we can go round and round all night asking pointless questions about things that we both know are better left off in the past, snarling at sniping when the other doesn't answer fast enough or-," fingers brushed against his bottom lip, "I can fuck you straight into the next sunrise and answer any and all questions you have over brunch tomorrow?"

Tempting. The offer was tempting. Too damn tempting. But Ichigo had to decline. If he gave in now-he'd only be letting Grimmjow get the better of him. He couldn't let that happen.

"I refuse."

The hand dropped.

Ichigo almost whined at the sudden loss but managed to control himself.

Still…

Grimmjow's face was completely blank now-void of expression-no not completely.

Was that a flash of disappointment shining in electric blue depths?

_()()_

(Grimmjow)

Of course it wouldn't be that easy. Grimmjow never really expected things to be that easy.

Kurosaki was a complex guy by nature so it was only fitting that every action or move he made was equally as complex.

Grimmjow's brain (okay more than just his brain) was still reeling from the kiss and so he really didn't have the desire to let things turned sour.

He refused to let his masculine pride get in the way of smart decision making-patience and time.

That's all it would take to get what he wanted.

His strawberry princess had questions. Wanted answers. What Kurosaki wants Kurosaki would get.

At least for now.

But first Grimmjow wanted a change of scenery.

He was sick and tiered of standing around in the crowded and stuffy ass hall. He'd had more than his fill. Had no damn desire to be under the watchful eye of Kurosaki's multiple friends and family members any longer.

"Fine, we'll do things your way but first follow me outside for a smoke."

Although the orange berry looked more than a bit wary and suspicious he agreed but not with out adding, "Don't try anything slick!"

Electric blues rolled and Grimmjow grinned, "Wouldn't dream of it strawberry princess."

Kurosaki released a low growl, "Bastard don't call me that!"

Grimmjow laughed and easily side stepped the foot meant to make him trip and fall on his face. "Can't tell you how much I've missed this, _Ichigo."_

The smaller man stopped in his tracks and heat rose to his cheeks once more. Then he scowled, quickly ran to catch up and snarled out an angry/irritated, "Stop doing that!"

With amused snort Grimmjow continued towards the exit.

The night was looking up.

()()

The staircase wasn't exactly the most comfortable of surfaces to sit on but anything was better than that overcrowded hall.

"Have a seat, this might take awhile."

Kurosaki crossed his arms and decided to be stubborn. "I'm fine standing, just talk."

Grimmjow shrugged, lit up a cigarette, took a drag and then gazed up at the stars for a few minutes. A moment to gather his thoughts.

He ignored as Kurosaki tapped his foot impatiently and took time to enjoy his cigarette.

()

And so began the long and detailed explanation about that "night" with Abarai.

Yes that night, even though Kurosaki hadn't straight out asked him about the night of house party, Grimmjow knew there was nothing else other than that incident that could have possibly affected his berry to such a degree.

"Look you ask me why I hooked up with Abarai? The answer is simple; he was the closest one to you and before you go and try to claim otherwise I'm gonna shut you down right there, princess."

A growl that only prompted a chuckle followed.

"You and Kuchiki might have known each other since you were in diapers, Yasutora might be your loyal guard dog and Asano might have lived so far up for asshole he could practically taste it for breakfast lunch and dinner but Abarai was the one, he was like the brother you always wanted but never had. Course the damn idiot thought of you as so much more than just a brother when he went and fell in love with you-course you were too dense to notice."

"If you're just going to insult me the entire time I'll leave and you can forget all about-

Out of the corner of one of his electric blues Grimmjow could see that his former rival was clenching and unclenching his fists-clearly getting pissed off.

Well too damn bad. Suck it up!

"No don't even try it Kurosaki, you want answers I'm going to give you answers-ain't gonna sugar coat things just to spare your feelings."

The orange haired male looked like he wanted to protest or argue but managed to bite his tongue.

"Like I was saying you were too dense to notice his growing affections towards you and Abarai was too chicken shit to tell it to your face-only managed to finally say it when Szayel buzzed 'round his ear but by then it was too late because you never wanted that stupid tattooed gorilla anyway."

Grimmjow lit up another cigarette, took a drag and continued, "Bastard cried 3 days straight after you brushed him off-why the hell Szayel started bringing him over to my place every afternoon," a shrug, "That's anyone's guess but anyway one thing led to another, Abarai slept over a couple of times and before you try to cut me off again (and don't think I don't see it coming) and say some shit like I seduced and molested your friend let me finish."

Kurosaki shot him a glare just then and griped out, "Don't point your finger at me, its rude."

Grimmjow chuckled, stubbed his cigarette and went to light another one, "Just making sure you're paying attention strawberry princess, you know how I hate repeating myself."

"Yeah, yeah whatever get on with it-so you say Renji slept in your bed and?"

"Woah slow your fuckin' roll and back up I never said anything about letting that bastard sleep in my bed."

A flash of something like relief flashed across Kurosaki's face just then and Grimmjow just couldn't help himself-he had to tease-had to push just a lil' but. "Look at you princess, developed quite the gutter brain over the past few years _eh_?"

An angry roar-yes roar of "**SHUT THE HELL UP GRIMMJOW!"**

All the tiny veins and muscles twitched and throbbed in the younger man's lithe and well-toned body, face was flushed with anger and embarrassment and for a moment it looked like Kurosaki might try and strike him.

Not that Grimmjow would admit it out loud but he was a bit startled just then-startled enough to the point where his cigarette slipped out of his mouth and rolled away.

A moment of silence passed.

Kurosaki began to pace back and forth back and forth like a caged animal.

No not a caged animal it would be more accurate to say the other man was pacing so much as he was getting ready to-

Hmm. Well Grimmjow would only be lying to himself if he honestly expect that there wouldn't be some sort of backlash-consequence to his behavior but there was a small part of him-miniscule really but still there-part of him that feared perhaps he'd taken it too far with the bs and the teasing and Kurosaki wasn't really and truly ready to forgive him for the past.

()

Grimmjow chose his next words a bit more carefully though he still didn't bother to sugar coat things.

"Abarai slept over a couple of times, more than a couple if you wanna be all technical,"

Brown eyes blazed and flashed in warning, Kurosaki's tone was dark/borderline threatening "You're _not _helping my mood right now."

Grimmjow lit up another cigarette and decided that there was a better way to handle this whole "confessions of our youth" hour.

He patted the empty spot beside him, kept his voice even and calm, "Come sit down _Ichigo_, you'll have plenty of opportunity to kick my ass after the story is over if you want to."

Not that he would sit there like a punching bag not in the least. But hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

Kurosaki looked reluctant, confused and irritated but beneath al that Grimmjow could see traces-glimpses of something stronger-something that he honestly hadn't thought would come.

At least not on tonight of all nights.

Shit. Damn. Fuck. It was so weird and yet so perfect and yet so everything that Grimmjow could feel his own face growing a bit warm-the berry had never looked at him with such _intensity-such-_

He felt as the other man sat down beside him-felt as Ichigo-_**his**_ Ichigo rested his head on his shoulder- and couldn't help but think WHAT THE FUCK?

Not what the fuck in a bad way but more like what the fuck is this seriously happening in a good way?

And it was happening.

Soft orange spikes tickled the side of Grimmjow's neck, a soft rasp, barely above a whisper reached his ear "I will forgive you so long as you promise not to lie to me from here on out."

**Now wait just a damn minute here! I wasn't lying. Hell I haven't even embellished anything tonight. **

Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his jaw then realized how stupid he was being and managed to calm down.

He had to look at the bright side of things. Kurosaki was alive and well and willing sat beside him. Kurosaki was willing resting his head on his shoulder.

"What good would lying do for either one of us at this point, hmm Ichigo?"

He didn't purr the name this time it came out more like a whisper, like a feathery caress against skin or a raindrop on a rose.

Woah and since when in the 7 hells of Hades did he, Grimmjow Jeagerjaques start thinking and acting like some GD poet?

Pfft only Kurosaki would turn him into such a chick!

()

It was a bit tricky to smoke with Kurosaki's head still resting on his shoulder but Grimmjow managed, "Abarai and I, we became close, developed a bond of sorts-well if you can call stuffing your face with hot pockets, snack cakes and cream soda bonding? If you can call having heated arguments, sometimes full on out brawls over who would be better suited for you."

A grin "Abarai usually lost," an eyebrow twitched a moment later, "But a few times he managed to get me in a good choke hold or headlock, tch! Sometimes we'd mess around, jerk each other off, maybe swap some spit but we usually were talking or thinking about you while it was happening.

Grimmjow felt Kurosaki stiffen beside him and squeezed the others' knee. "Don't get so worked up, you're the one who wanted to hear this."

The berry mumbled something under his breath but relaxed a moment later.

Grimmjow sighed although it sounded more like a groan-this was exhausting. "When Abarai wasn't going on and on about being madly in love with you he'd start talking about Kuchiki."

"You mean Rukia?"

A snort, "Yeah, her anyway guy was convinced-hell almost had me convinced that you and Kuchiki had a thing."

"Thing?" Orange brows furrowed for a moment and then a dawning look passed over Kurosaki's face and he scowled "Why would he-why would you-arghhh I-it wasn't like that, Rukia's like a sister to me-a really annoying sister but no-just NO!"

Grimmjow took one final drag from his cigarette and stubbed it, "Figured as much but Abarai had it in his head that Kuchiki is the real reason you turned him down."

The berry shook his head "No I never-I never saw Renji that way I mean I onl- he trailed off and looked away.

Grimmjow counted 3 minutes giving the other man time to complete his sentence. It never came. So he decided to be the one to break the silence once more.

"Even when I didn't have to hear about Abarai's latest fantasy involving you or Kuchiki and you _together_, a sneer, "I spent plenty of time having my own fantasies about you."

A low muttered, "Yeah I'll bet you did, you pervert."

Grimmjow released a low chuckle, scooted closer and then reached over and slowly, carefully pulled the smaller man back towards him and lightly carded his fingers through bright orange locks,

"Contrary to what you might think. Not all of my thoughts about you were perverse." He informed the other, "There were plenty of times when sexing you up didn't cross my mind at all."

Kurosaki snorted as if he didn't believe one damn word of what Grimmjow was telling him but there was a certain twinkle in cinnamon and coffee brown orbs as he looked up to meet his gaze.

"It's true," Grimmjow insisted, "Sometimes just laying or sitting with someone I care about (he couldn't bring himself to say LOVE yet) is better than-

"Sexing me up?" There was a smile tugging at peach ripened lips now. A sigh of content was quick to follow, "_Go on_."

Blue eyes widened and blinked rapidly.

A light infectious laugh reached Grimmjow's over sensitized ears as the berry lifted up his head to further elaborate on what he meant "I meant go on with the story."

_Riiiight. The story. Damn._

"Ha! Now's whose the one with the gutter brain?"

Touche.

Grimmjow resumed carding his fingers through soft orange locks and hummed, "Before I go on can I ask you a question?"

"…"

"It's not a bad question just something I've been wondering about for a long time."

"…"

"I'll take your silence as a yes, so I'm just gonna go ahead and ask it," brief pause, "When you came across us that night, me and Abarai I mean, why didn't you say or do anything?"

The light in brown eyes dimmed "I-it's complicated."

Kurosaki was struggling to form the words. The "answer" or the "explanation" or the "response" was there but he wasn't sure how to get it past his lips.

Grimmjow could tell and although he was trying his best to be patient …well fair was fair right? He wasn't exactly tickled pink about bringing up baggage from the past but he was doing it so…

"Kuro-Ichigo you wanted me to be honest and tell you everything and I'm doing that but you gotta give me _something_ in return."

He wasn't pleading. And he damn sure wasn't begging. Hell he wasn't even demanding-at least he was trying to demand anything.

Still…Grimmjow gnawed on the side of his cheek-Kurosaki had some explaining to do as well.

The berry stiffened and then withdrew completely and crossed his arms. Then grumbled out an almost childish sounding, "I don't have to_ give _you anything."

()()

TBC

()()

Yes the chapter is ending there. Why because the night is about to take a not-quite pleasant turn. Ooops said too much. Anyways hope you enjoyed. THANK YOU FOR READING.

~SLY~


	20. Chapter TWELVE

**Disclaimer: BLEACH DOES NOT BELONG TO SLY BUT IF IT DID… MUHAHAHAHAHAHA.**

A/N Reminder in SLY's world things usually end on a happy note.

I would also like to take a few minutes to thank those special few who are still reviewing

_Narutopokefan, Hollow Ichigo-Ichigo, __IILesGeMeAuxII and of course Ane-chan who inspired and thus I have dedicated this fic to. THANK YOU SO MUCH! LET'S CONTINUE TO WAVE OUR GRIMMICHI BANNERS/FLAGS HIGH AND PROUDLY!_

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, spelling, grammar, punctuation, flashbacks, other pairings, etc

_DRUNKEN SEAHORSE_

**CHAPTER 12**

Last time…

_"I'll take your silence as a yes, so I'm just gonna go ahead and ask it," brief pause, "When you came across us that night, me and Abarai I mean, why didn't you say or do anything?"_

_The light in brown eyes dimmed "I-it's complicated."_

_Kurosaki was struggling to form the words. The "answer" or the "explanation" or the "response" was there but he wasn't sure how to get it past his lips._

_Grimmjow could tell and although he was trying his best to be patient …well fair was fair right? He wasn't exactly tickled pink about bringing up baggage from the past but he was doing it so…_

_"Kuro-Ichigo you wanted me to be honest and tell you everything and I'm doing that but you gotta give me something in return."_

_He wasn't pleading. And he damn sure wasn't begging. Hell he wasn't even demanding-at least he wasn't trying to demand anything._

_Still…Grimmjow gnawed on the side of his cheek-Kurosaki had some explaining to do as well._

_The berry stiffened and then withdrew completely and crossed his arms. Then grumbled out an almost childish sounding, "I don't have to give you anything."_

_()()_

_**AND NOW…**_

_**(Ichigo)**_

He asked the questions and Grimmjow was giving him the answers and now Ichigo was expected to do the same in return.

Fair was Fair. So instead of acting like a child he needed to man up!

"I was-I guess I was jealous."

No not guess-he was or rather Ichigo had been equally jealous and furious at the same time. An electric blue brow lifted. Whether it was for his benefit or because Grimmjow was honestly surprised? It was a tough call.

"Jealous of what? Why?"

"Jealous of everything. Him. You. It!"

"No shit? Seriously?!"

Damn it why did the asshole have to sound so pleased?

Ichigo scowled. "Stop sounding so excited! It's not everyday a guy comes across his best-friend and uh the guy he's crushing on going at it like a couple of- he trailed off, suddenly finding the glittering white steps far more interesting than Grimmjow's face.

Well no that wasn't entirely true it just made things a little easier, well sort of.

"Like a couple of what?"

Ichigo shot Grimmjow a filthy glare. _**'Don't make me say it out loud you bastard.'**_

"_Heh," _Grimmjow rubbed his chiseled hairless chin, "What else was going on in your mind at that time I wonder."

Browns eyes flashed fiercely and Ichigo hissed, "_Shut up." through his teeth._

"Aww Ichigo don't be like that, we're bonding here, connecting, reuniting, paving the way for a better tomorrow."

Paving the way for a better tomorrow? His rival couldn't be serious? Did he know how idiotic he sounded just now? Ichigo wasn't in the mood to laugh but he couldn't help but let a small snort slip out.

Grimmjow nudged him a playful sort of manner and batted his eyelashes, "What can I say you bring out the cheese ball in me."

The amused snort turned into pure laughter and with it Ichigo felt a little bit better. No more than a little bit.

Grimmjow seemed all too pleased with himself and said, "It's good to hear you laugh, even better that I'm the reason behind your reason for laughing."

"Okay stop seriously and get back to the story!" Yet even with this not-so-friendly demand after a moment or so Ichigo returned the playful nudge.

Grimmjow shook his head and poked the berry in the nose. "Nope not until you finish answering my question."

"I just di-

"Elaborate. Tell me more. Was it just jealousy you were feeling or was there more? Even though you didn't do or say anything surely you thought about it didn't you?"

Why was Grimmjow pushing? What did it matter?

"I thought a lot of things I mean argghh this is stupid."

"No it's not."

Ichigo was becoming frustrated again.

"Come on Ichigo we both have done things in the past that we're not proud of but so what?"

Yeah easy for Grimmjow to say he's not the one who-

Ichigo grumbled unintelligibly under his breath. Could tell Grimmjow was becoming just as equally as annoyed but just couldn't bring himself to care.

After a moment or so the other man gave up

"Fine. You sit there and sulk awhile and I'll continue."

()()

"Szayel thought he was real clever at times-prided himself on being a step above the rest but I wasn't a damn fool. I knew he had to have some sort of ulterior motive when he oh-so-casually announced that the theme of the party was "RED". Plus Abarai couldn't keep a secret to save his li-

"Wait! Back up I'm confused again."

Grimmjow let out a sigh or was it a groan? It was difficult to tell.

"I always knew there was a part of Szayel that couldn't stand my ass. Don't know if its 'cuz he felt intimidated by me or what-either way he thought I needed to be knocked off my high horse," a half grin, "I've been told I'm too cocky for my own good."

"Well you can be." Ichigo pointed out in all honesty.

An electric blue brow twitched and Grimmjow growled but Ichigo knew the other man well enough by now and could tell that his rival wasn't really offended or upset.

"Anyway so Szayel'd lecture me about my bad bed hopping habits, would go on and on about how it would all back fire and bite me in the ass one day."

Ichigo didn't know if he'd be able to handle hearing the rest of Grimmjow's story but he managed, somehow.

"Not that I gave two fucks what he thought since I wasn't tied down to anyone," the half Canadian continued in low and lazy sort of drawl as he lit up another cigarette,

"Had no need for extra bullshit and baggage-things like "relationships"," camel colored lips curled into a sneer, "Didn't think much of em' which is why Abarai would then pipe in with one of his "_And that's one of the major reasons why you don't deserve Ichigo."_

Ichigo wasn't quite sure how to respond to this additional piece of information. Wasn't sure how to react. Luckily Grimmjow wasn't looking for or expecting a reaction out of him.

But he could sense that the other man was growing beyond frustrated and tiered of having to explain himself-the way Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his perfect chiseled jaw spoke volumes.

Ichigo mentally kicked himself for being momentarily distracted.

"So anyway as I was saying the theme of the party was "RED" and at the time I thought it was dumb since how in the fuck could a color of the rainbow be a theme for a party? Then I caught the look passing between Szayel and Ilfort and it dawned on me. Was so fucking obvious actually I shoulda known-shoulda figured it out a lot sooner. "RED" was in reference to you."

"What do you mean in reference to me?"

Although a part of Ichigo wasn't sure he really wanted to know. He had a few guesses but-

"You were gonna be the special guest of the night." Grimmjow informed him less than a heartbeat later.

Ichigo frowned. He wasn't a Grade A moron but he was still failing to find the connection-

"Uh my hair is orange and how many times must I tell you my name doesn't mean strawberry!"

Grimmjow smirked, pressed his forehead against Ichigo's and half murmured/half purred, "You'll always be _**my**_ _strawberry_." And then pulled away before the moment could be ruined by an angry string of curse words or something equally unpleasant-like

'_**Like my fist in his face.'**_ Thought Ichigo '_**Bastard's lucky I'm keeping my cool or else I'd really-**_

Grimmjow's smooth, self assured drawl drowned out the rest of Ichigo's inner grumblings "Like I was sayin' you were gonna be the special guest of the night-least that was the plan til' Abarai let slip Szayel's true motive."

"True motive?"

"Szayel's a tricky bastard, said as much before didn't I?"

"Yeah but he's also your friend right or at least he was back then? And Renji seems to see something in him so he can't be all that bad can he?"

"Tch, Abarai is a love sick fool simply settling. Nothing more. Nothing less."

Ichigo's frown deepened. Renji might be a bit of a dunce at times but-

"Don't talk about him like that! Renji's a good guy and he doesn't deserve to be played for a fool!" It was habit really-coming to the defense of his friend-second nature-something that Ichigo had never given up even though he hadn't spoken to the tattooed redhead in years.

"Stop getting your panties in a twist, princess. Nothing happened to Abarai that the dumb gorilla didn't want to have happen."

"I don't wear panties bastard! And what the hell is your obsession with my underwear anyway?" a cocked brow "You got some kind of fetish you wanna fill me in on Grimmjow?"

Electric blues flashed but Grimmjow did not offer a vocal response. Apparently it was left up for interpretation. Ichigo filed it away in his brain and decided to think on it at a later time.

"Fine, whatever," an eye roll, "So what exactly was I supposed to do at this house party entitled "RED" anyway? Dance around with a lampshade on my head? Play a set of bongos? Jump out of a large cake in my birthday suit?"

He was being sarcastic but noticed that it didn't stop Grimmjow from being well…Grimmjow.

Electric blues darkened and glazed over at the mention of "birthday suit"

Grimmjow leered at Ichigo. Ichigo scowled and slugged the other man none-too-gently "Get your mind out of the damn gutter and finish the story, asshole."

It took a moment. No more like 10 long minutes before the half Canadian came back down from his brief trip to fantasyland.

"Heh as you wish, princess."

"Yeah I wish. Get on with it!"

How long had they been out here anyway? Not that Ichigo was bored or anything but-

The berry's train of thoughts scattered to the western winds as Grimmjow abandoned his cigarette and then did something quite unexpected and entwined their hands together.

Ichigo could have protested. Should have protested but the act was harmless so why bother? And on the plus side Grimmjow's hand was warm-really warm. It felt kind of nice. No better than nice.

As if sharing his exact sentiments the blue haired man released a sigh of content and looked over at him just then, "This is kind of nice, eh _Ichigo?"_

Ichigo noted that his first name was rolling past Grimmjow's lips with greater ease with each passing moment.

He didn't think it was possible to fall that much harder but in that moment, the berry did.

()()

"Thing you gotta understand here is I didn't have much interest in redheads, thought even less of foreigners til' I butted heads with you. Course it was never really about what you looked like or where you were from. You just had this aura or energy or whatever the hell you wanna call it. I felt drawn to you and couldn't stay away-didn't want to stay away. Thought if crap like destiny existed than you were the walking talking definition."

Grimmjow's tone was completely serious. Not a trace of teasing or a hint of sarcasm. His speech-rant was very similar to the one he'd given back in the grand hall. Only some how _even better. _It was…Ichigo felt overwhelmed. He had a difficult time keeping his brown gaze locked on blue.

He moved his lips wanting to respond but could not find the right words. An awkward silence followed and then that familiar Cheshire cat grin stretched across Grimmjow's face once more.

"At first as you know I tried to do everything in my power to get you to hate me."

Ichigo didn't remember it going quite like that, but he wasn't going to correct Grimmjow either.

"I'd never seen any one turn so red so quickly-never met a guy who put his friends and family needs before his own."

Ichigo cut in immediately jumping in defensive mode, "If that is supposed to be an insult-

"It's not. Fact is it only me like you that much more. 'Course I couldn't let on that this was the case-wasn't ready to admit or even hint that I might be interested in another guy in "that way" ya know?"

'_**Yeah actually I do,'**_ thought Ichigo inwardly.

"Remember that day in the rain?"

Random question. Had nothing to do with what they had been discussing. Orange brows knitted together and Ichigo wracked his brain trying to recount a day in the rain spent with Grimmjow. He was drawing a bit of a blank.

"Uh is there more? I mean it rain's a lot in Karakura Town," a scowl marred Ichigo's face a moment later as he grumbled out a low, "don't care much for rain-never have."

Grimmjow looked like he was going to elaborate at first but then shook his head and decided to rapidly change subjects…well sort of.

"I snuck into my first gay bar when I was 16."

Uh er um what? Okay? And? What exactly was Ichigo supposed to say in response to that?

Grimmjow seemed to find his non-response amusing for some reason. "Never get tiered of seeing that expression on your face."

"…"

"Anyway it was during a trip to the homeland. I was seeing this college girl at the time or well to be more accurate I was fucking her in her daddy's art studio while he was away with his lil' wifey at some fancy gala or another."

Ichigo's nose scrunched n distaste. He really had no desire to hear about Grimmjow's past sexploits. "Aren't you getting off subject again?"

"Nah, not really it all adds up in the end."

Doubtful. Really doubtful.

"Cami was a real tigress if you catch my drift?"

Really and now a brow waggle?

"I really don't want to hear anymore."

"Trust me you need to hear this."

"No I don't and if you don't start taking what I say seriously I'll get up and leave!"

Not that he wanted to leave but he had to make Grimmjow understand some how some way. Threatening to leave was his best option at the moment.

"Fine we'll skip the part about Cami."

"Thank you."

Grimmjow snorted and resumed his tale "Like most teens going to the same movies, malls, clubs, food stops became fucking boring after awhile. Gotta get out and explore-find new things-meet new faces-hot wire a few cars-rob a few candy stores and when that gets old gotta get creative-take a few risks-experiment-

"So what kind of experiment did you get out of sneaking into a gay bar?"

"I don't think you really wanna know but you'll find out all in good time."

What the hell was that supposed to mean?

Was that Grimmjow's subtle way of proposing a date some time in the new future? Or was it-

Ichigo scowled. The bastard was making fun of him again wasn't he? Were they ever gonna move past that? And more importantly-?

"What does any of this "stuff" got to do with me Grimmjow?"

Another uncharacteristic waggling of brows, "Everything and nothing Ichigo, everything and nothing." Grimmjow stood up, apparently tiered of sitting down.

It was probably for the best. Ichigo was tiered of sitting down too.

"Are we continuing the conversation elsewhere?"

In other words did Grimmjow expect him to follow him somewhere.

"Nah I think I've done enough talkin' for one night don't you?"

No. Yes. No.

"Is that it then?"

Shit! Did his voice really crack just then?

Grimmjow lifted a brow, "What are you expecting strawberry princess? I've told you pretty much all there is to tell about the night of the house party and well when I started to tell you more about myself it seemed to irritate you so-a careless shrugging of shoulders, "What happens next is up to you-follow me or not follow me? Ask me to stay-not that I'll necessarily agree but you can still ask."

Before he could even come up with a proper reply Grimmjow started making his way down the steps and Ichigo felt like he'd been kicked in the chest, stomach and nads all at once.

Grimmjow was leaving. He'd said quote "all he needed to say" and now he was leaving…leaving and didn't seem to give two shits about what Ichigo thought-didn't seem to-

WTF?

He called after the other man "After all this time you still-why do you constantly find ways to torture me if you argghh!"

He was wasting his breath. Grimmjow kept on walking-didn't seem to give a rats left testicle about the night or tomorrow or the future or anything-

Ichigo felt the last cord snap and released a primal roar-the kind of sound that could shake the earth's ground if such things were possible out side of fiction-the kind of roar that could be heard three blocks over and then some.

And then he was running-racing down the stairs with the kind of speed he hadn't used since his high school days.

Caught up with his bastard rival in record time (not that Grimmjow was going particularly fast to begin with-not the point!)

And then Ichigo was pouncing-tackling the taller more muscular man to the ground-leaving them both winded for a few minutes. Only a few.

()

Ichigo ignored the way his body protested against the impact-ignored the way his fist stung when he failed to hit Grimmjow's face and wound up hitting concrete instead.

Damn bastard must have seen it coming-still had those quick reflexes-hadn't changed a bit.

Ichigo snarled viciously at the unfairness of it all and raised his burning fist fully intending to strike again-this time he would not miss! Or at least that was the plan.

Leave to Grimmjow to act all out of character (how many times had he done this tonight?) block the blow by gently grabbing hold of Ichigo's wrist and softly chastise him for his moronic move. "Idiot."

Slowly, carefully Grimmjow pressed his coffee and nicotine stained lips against Ichigo's now swollen knuckles. "Now look what you've done to yourself."

Ichigo tried to glare but he could tell by the expression on the others face that he was failing tremendously. _**'Damn it! Damn him!'**_

"Now's not a good time to tempt with those pouty lips of yours, Ichigo."

Bastard! How did he? Yes how could Grimmjow possibly know what kind of expression Ichigo was wearing at the moment when he was still busily inspecting the damage the berry had done to his own hand?

"It's called Cat's Eye. Perhaps I'll tell you about it some time." Grimmjow explained a moment later.

Cat's Eye? What the hell was that? Ichigo shook his head. This night was weird. Filled with ups and downs. He couldn't even tell the difference between when Grimmjow was joking and being serious. Everything was one big jumble. Hell he couldn't even remember why he'd lost his temper just a few minutes-more like seconds ago?

Well he could but-

"What did you say to Renji to get him to go along with it? Was it really just the alcohol or did you develop some sort of feelings for one another along the way?"

Ichigo could tell by the way the muscles twitched and rippled underneath him that Grimmjow was fed up with talking about the damn party.

Logically the berry knew he should let it drop and move on but he…he couldn't-not yet. Not until he was absolutely sure-there had to me more to it-some important fact or details was clearly missing from the story-something else had happened-surely

"Ichigo you're not being fair."

Fair? Oh that's rich!

Who the hell was Grimmjow to lecture him on being fair?

Ichigo released a bitter humorless chuckle "You want to talk to me about being fair? How the hell do you call constantly fucking with my emotions fair? How the hell is turning one of my best friends into one of your on-call whores fair? How the hell is having a secret afternoon rendezvous at a fucking tea shop with my mother fucking fair? How is anything that you've done or said back in high school and here in present day fucking fair, huh _**GRIMMJOW?!"**_

Grimmjow's upper lip curled in a nasty snarl, a dark edge now colored his tone, "First off you weren't exactly crystal clear on what you wanted back then out of me either.

Half the time you'd look at me with so much fire in your eyes and then the other half of the time you'd cower and shy away like a little kitten-sometimes you'd challenge me declaring you'd kick my ass all the way back to Canada and enjoy every second of it.

Then other times you'd try to make peace offerings and leave silly presents outside my fucking mailbox!"

"When I'd confront you on it you'd play dumb-something we both know you're not and something I can't fucking stand!

Second I'm sick of hearing about Abarai-you wanna know more about what transpired between him, me and Szayel? Go ask him on your own damn time! 'Cuz as it is I don't give two flying fucks about him or what he thinks or feels. He was a rival-a pathetic rival for your affections-I taught him a few tricks-loosened his virgin hole and sent him on his merry way."

"Did we have some good times? Sure yeah what teenage guy doesn't enjoy getting his rocks off." A snort, "You ain't exactly so innocent either Kurosaki, you wanna talk about fuckin' 'round with emotions what do you call that little sunset scene with that bitch Kuchiki at graduation eh? What do you call that little hall way grope and grab session with-nah never mind you know what I don't even care at this point!

"And as for the "secret rendezvous with mummy dearest"? Don't make me fucking gag!" A sneer, "I wouldn't touch your mother with a ten foot pole! You wanna know what really happened that afternoon? I'll tell you.

She found me nosing around in your backyard, invited me to tea and then threatened to cut me up into teeny tiny pieces and feed me to her prized Siberian husky if I so much as even suggested that my intentions towards you weren't entirely pure and from the heart.

"So there you have it princess. I'm not gonna repeat myself a forth fuckin' time-nor should I have to. Now get the hell off me before I really lose my temper."

"No."

Electric blues flashed in warning. "This isn't a negotiation. Get OFF!"

"No." Ichigo crossed his arms and decided to be a stubborn ass because-because he could! "You want me to get off you're gonna have to physically force me off of you."

Electric blues narrowed and this time Grimmjow hissed angrily _**"GET OFF!"**_

Ichigo didn't budge. Not did he plan to. Grimmjow had said a mouthful and then some. Now it was his turn.

"I'm not getting off until I say what needs to be said."

A growl. An eye roll. A sneer. All in that order.

Ichigo wasn't the least bit fazed or intimidated.

"Be honest. Why did you seek me out again? Why did you come here tonight, Grimmjow?"

Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his perfect jaw. "…"

Ichigo was not backing down.

"We can do this all night or for the next three nights-however long it takes doesn't matter but I'm not making any official decisions about anything until I know where you stand. What's so special about me anyway? Aside from my unique hair color? Aside from my unsoiled virgin ass? Aside from the fact that I'm one of the few who can take you on in a fight? Why me?"

This was ridiculous. What hell was wrong with him? Why was he still pressing-pushing-demanding more?

Grimmjow had already said and done and expressed so much and still Ichigo found himself asking for more?

Why?

Ichigo didn't know. Or he did know but didn't want to admit the real reason for his irrational behavior and his unfair accusations.

He didn't want to admit that he was-that a part of him felt unworthy?

Was that the word? Yes unworthy of Grimmjow's affection.

Ichigo felt inadequate. He was crazy about the other man-so consumed with lust and love that he could barely stand it anymore.

Yes and he was also afraid that some how some way he would fuck things up.

Maybe 4 years and a half hadn't been long enough? Maybe 10 years wouldn't even be enough time to-

Ichigo stopped mentally abusing and berating himself when he felt a finger flick him in the forehead.

"You're thinking too much again, Ichigo."

Half dazed Ichigo asked a dumbfounded, "Am I?"

"Listen princess we don't have to go over every little detail of our lives both past and present all in one night. We don't need to talk about 2 or 5 or 10 years from now. Let's just forget about the bullshit and drama for a moment and enjoy being in each others company?"

Easier said then done.

"Think about it with out all the prying eyes and ears of others let's just focus son on us and how much fun we could be having right now."

Could it really be as easy as Grimmjow was making it sound? Ichigo couldn't help but feel skeptical.

"Don't give me that look. Just trust me on this one."

Trust? Could he really bring himself to trust his rival?

"Loosen up-stop frowning so much! Come on let's try it! I'll start…-What have you been up to in the past few years? Got any new hobbies? Lovers? (Ichigo didn't miss the way a blue brow twitched) Friends? You always had an appreciation for literature right? Are you working towards a teaching degree? Have your interests changed and I don't know you like studying plants now or something?"

Studying plants? How totally and completely random?

Ichigo rubbed the back of his head and shot Grimmjow a equally curious/confused look "What ever gave you that idea?"

Grimmjow flicked him in the forehead a third time "You're missing the point!"

"I am?"

What point was that exactly?

Grimmjow released an exasperated sigh and raked his hand through his hair, "I'm trying to lighten the mood here princess but your mind is still stuck in that dark fog."

Dark fog?

Ichigo could feel Grimmjow moving beneath him-moving but not struggling-which meant in spite of the man's early protests he really didn't seem to mind the current position after all ergo-wait a minute!

Cinnamon and coffee brown eyes widened and then narrowed-what was that look passing across Grimmjow's features. Ichigo knew that look and knew it well-had burned it into his brain long ago. Grimmjow was up to something.

Question was what was he up t-?

()

"U-waaaa!"

"Ngh, yeah that's better."

Just like that. In a blink or less than a blink Grimmjow flipped their positions.

Ichigo mentally slapped himself for not seeing it coming soon enough and then glared up at the grinning bastard.

And then Grimmjow's face was coming nearer and nearer and-

"Don't even think about i-!"

Ichigo's not quite threatening sounding threat died the instant Grimmjow's warm tongue found its way around his for the second time that night.

()()

To protest or not to protest wasn't really the question at this point. Ichigo welcomed Grimmjow's kisses after only moment or two of putting up a struggle.

He'd only been fooling himself by trying to resist-by trying to fight against the inevitable.

Well that coupled with his masculine pride, which refused to take a backseat!

Old habits do diehard.

And along with Grimmjow's kiss, Ichigo welcomed the others touch-moaning and grunting with want-with need.

()

Moving-grinding-touching back-definitely touching back-raking blunt finger nails over the same sexy body he drooled/dreamt over too many times to count. Over the shirt-under the shirt-He simply couldn't get enough of the way strong muscles rippled like waves beneath his fingers-

()

Grimmjow's hand was busy making its way into Ichigo's pants-

Grimmjow was just seconds away from brushing the palm of his hand against one of Ichigo's bare butt cheeks when it dawned on the berry.

They were not behind closed doors.

They were outside.

Outside on the ground just below the steps of the Drunken Seahorse-his friends-his family-several party guests could come tumbling out of the doors at any moment and-

"_Stop!"_

The hell he would have his anal cherry popped under such circumstances!

Surprisingly (Wow Grimmjow was just full of surprises tonight!) the hand stilled and Grimmjow detached his mouth from Ichigo's bruised collar bone- (bastard had been nipping at it for a good 15 minutes-possibly more!)

A look of annoyance passed over Grimmjow's chiseled features and he hissed out a not so friendly "_What?"_

"Don't you "what" me we're outside!"

A grunt "So?"

Typical. Ichigo felt the urge to hit his rival in the face flare up once again. His left hand didn't pack as much of a punch as his right but he could still leave the bastard with a shiner or two.

"No not so? Get off me before someone sees us!"

Grimmjow seemed to consider Ichigo's words. And after another moment or two he retracted his hand and obeyed Ichigo's request/demand though he didn't seem the least bit happy about it.

In fact now that he was back on his feet Grimmjow was padding his pockets in search of his beloved cigarette and lighter.

Ichigo resisted the urge to roll his eyes, climbed to his feet and pulled his boxer shorts back up.

He noted that the moon was still high in the sky, which meant it wasn't as late as he originally thought it might be.

Still-Ichigo glanced down at his watch-it was late enough.

And he should probably head home and get an ice pack for his hand-it would probably swell to the size of a pitchers glove by tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow-he couldn't just get up and leave with out-

"So uh-

Grimmjow smirked at him in that all knowing way, "What's on your mind berry princess?"

"Nothing. Well no not nothing I was just um-you mentioned brunch earlier and did you really mean um-

"Huh? Speak up I can't understand you when you're mumbling."

Bullshit! He wasn't mumbling! And even if he had been mumbling Grimmjow had like supersonic hearing and-

Electric blues shined with amusement.

Bastard was messing with him again-Ichigo watched and became mesmerized for a few minutes as the other man blew perfect smoke rings. Then shook his head.

"Brunch. You mentioned brunch earlier?" Ichigo repeated.

Grimmjow looked thoughtful for a moment or maybe he was just having another gutter brain moment-sometimes it was hard to tell.

"Oh _brunch, _yeah I didsay we'd do brunch didn't I? Heh, well when I made the suggestion it was half in jest but yeah sure we could do brunch," there was a perverted twinkle in electric blue depths "You gonna crash at my place for the night?"

Ichigo scoffed, "Get serious! One make out session and a lil' grope and grab time does not mean my ass is now officially the property of one Grimmjow Jeagerjaques."

Grimmjow then leered at him, "Then what does it mean, eh _Ichigo?"_

"It means uh-

Crap! Not this shit again!

Why was he struggling and stumbling over his over his words again?

And why did Ichigo feel his face heating up? He managed to stomp his blush down for the past couple of hours or so and now-

Now the damn blush was returning with a vengeance!

"Fuck me."

It was a low muttered curse, barely above a whisper but of course naturally Grimmjow heard it loud and clear.

The smirk on his face spoke volumes.

"Love to do just that," the smirk widened, "More than you can possibly imagine but as you've so eloquently pointed out several times tonight I've yet to earn all of my official brownie points."

Brownie points? Why did Grimmjow have to phrase everything in such a-?

"Must you be so crude all of the time?"

Grimmjow chuckled and then was upon Ichigo once more-his tongue darting out and licking along the shell of red-tinted ear as he purred out,

"_You know you love it."_

()()

TBC

_What will happen next time?_

_Well…Shiro happens, YAY. Also…flashbacks return in fool swing and…other stuff, smirks._

_THANKS FOR JOINING ME ONCE AGAIN! SEE YOU NEXT TIME_

_PS. Please do sly a favor and check out my V-crack shot?…it would make my day complete. =)_

~SLY~


	21. CHAPTER THIRTEEN INTERMISSION 3 ARFAC

Disclaimer: So I went to ACEN for first time ever and what did I find? Not nearly as much BLEACH fans/franchise as I was hoping for…sighs. Kubo-sensei owns it all, the rest of us just dream.

A/N Right so it's been quite a gap since the last update? SLY has no excuse what's so ever…well unless you count writer's fog (its completely different from writer's block let me tell you) and personal bs getting in the way. So I owe you a chapter, a lengthy one yes? Sorry you only get an intermission that sets the next chapter in motion.

Additional notes: Some time back Shiro was a bad boy who couldn't resist jumping Grimmjow…bad Shiro, bad…anyway this scene received mixed responses/feelings…including but not limited to confusion/anger/disappointment/disgust…I said I would shine some light on it…and so here you have it…told straight from the mouth from everyone's favorite powdered berry.

ENJOY! And thanks for reading!

Shiro's viewpoint…

_DRUNKEN SEAHORSE_

CHAPTER 13

**ARFAC**

**This entry is dedicated to NPH**

**Ask anyone who knows me and they'll surely tell ya that my numba one priority in life is Ichi. Ensurin' his absolute happiness. I have his best interest in mind. Always. **

**So ya ask me and ya selves why then did I go and have sex with the love of his life?**

**If I was gonna be an ass I'd tell ya to mind ya damn business it's between me and the the Puss but I got nothin' to hide-plus I don't wanna go and give ya the wrong idea.**

**So here's what really went down the afternoon I boinked Grimm…**

**It had nothin' to do with lust or jealously nor my insatiable appetite to bone anything with hot abs and a pulse. It was about opportunity. Opportunity struck and so I ran with it. Confused? Shall I shine an even brighter light on this tale?**

**()**

**The Artificial Realistic Feeling Anal Canal-also known as ARFAC- a clever little device which fits nice and snug over a real hole-for best results loosen natural opening first-**

**Quiorra and I were lyin' awake in bed one night when he first mentioned it. At first I didn't really see the point in addin' a new toy to our sex life-felt we had more than enough already but then Quiorra bein' Quiorra effectively shut me up and further elaborated.**

"_The Artificial Realistic Feeling Anal Canal can be used for multiple purposes not just as a toy."_

**When Quiorra gets excited about somethin' his bottle green eyes sparkle like bright emeralds in a dark cave-my interest was piqued.**

**()**

**We'd been discussin' it awhile-throwing the idea around back and forth-ya know having a child. Adoption (although an obvious choice) held little to no appeal for either of us and there wasn't any damn genies or witches 'round to help me an' Quiorra grow vaginas over night so that left us with one option.**

**A surrogate. Getting some woman to agree wouldn't be the hard part. At least I didn't think so but hey I'm losin' track of my story here so-**

**Quiorra and I are determined to spawn a brat of our own and with the help of science and ARFAC the possibilities are endless.**

**Thing is Quiorra and I aren't the kinda guys to jump into things blindly because as with all things there are risks involved. **

**And in times when one such as my self is unsure, having a guinea pig or two is necessary.**

**Without realizing what he was in for-Grimm became my Guinea pig. How I wound up on the receiving end I still can't quite figure out but I ain't gonna dwell on it.**

**Part of the Kurosaki/Shiba curse I guess-eventually windin' up on bottom.**

**Wait! Forget I said that. Or at least promise me you'll never tell Ichi?**

**Bleh. I did what I had to do and in the end I got what I wanted (semen-Grimm's semen-) even if the puss himself was sickened and confused as all fuck-oh I forget to mention the part where I drugged him didn't I? **

**Ah well story for another time-side's its not like it was your typical drug-just an invisible aphrodisiac type of powder-completely harmless-makes you horny as fuck and then come like a sum-bitch but-hey we all gotta make our sacrifices don't we?**

**Heh, so the game plan from that moment on was quite simple-collect semen-take to lab-put on ice-put next step in action-well actually that was Quiorra's part-usin' Ichi as his guinea pig-wasn't sure how two bottoms would accomplish this but then again my Quiorra is full of surprises so all you need to know is…once both samples are collected…they will be brought to a special lab and mixed together and voila, baby in the making.**

**Then collectively the four of us will sit down to Sunday brunch and search for a surrogate. **

**We figure if Grimm and Ichi succeed in the "parenting thing" then Quiorra and I will be shooins. And this time next year I'll be a proud uncle and a baby daddy.**

**Ah there's nothing sweeter than success.**

**Okay, okay so maybe it wasn't gonna be that easy since Grimm and Ichi are only at the beginnin' stages of their couplin' or whatever you wanna call it. **

**But a wise man once said 'good things come to those who wait for it.'**

**()()**

**TBC**

**()()**

_And since it's been oh so long since a proper update here's a mini teaser of the next chapter…._

_()()_

"_So are you sure you don't want to reconsider and continue where we left off?"_

_Grimmjow threw Ichigo a sideways grin as they walked up to the front of the emergency room-after a fair amount of griping and groaning he'd been able to convince his strawberry to let him tag along with the promise that he would be on his best behavior and keep his hands to himself._

_Not exactly the easiest task but Grimmjow was confident that he'd manage. All he desired at this moment was spending more time with Ichigo even if it meant waiting around endlessly for the other's name to be called._

_()()_

_**THANKS FOR READING AND YOUR CONTINUED SUPPORT!**_

_**~SLY~**_


	22. CHAPTER FOURTEEN

**Disclaimer: Kubo-sensei, thou art a genius. Not I. Not SLY.**

**Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, GRIMMXICHI, othersICHI, othersGRIMM, language, spelling, punctuation, switching view-points, run-ons, flashbacks, light citrus bits, etc…**

Dedicated/Inspired by Anemone Kurosaki, more affectionately known as Ane-chan.

Much thanks goes to: Narutopokefan, HollowIchigo-Ichigo, FrostySquid, Castiel4Life for reviewing.

Additional thanks goes out to: Hollowshirosaki413, Xerter, venusdoom666, Severe Broccoli, azimej, Erised-desire056, xJobozx, tsukiko3000, Celebi284 for following.

A/N well so much for the third intermission eh? Crickets. Crickets. And a tumbleweed or two rolling pass. Sighs, anyway here's a real chapter, it starts out as an accompany piece of Shiro's viewpoint but then switches back to the regular formula with Ichigo and Grimmjow. Let's see what you think.

**ENJOY!**

()()

_DRUNKEN SEAHORSE_

**CHAPTER 14**

**()**

**(Shiro)**

**Shiro wasn't Ichigo's cousin for nothing. He knew the orange berry like the back of his own hand. **

**Knew what the other man was thinking-what he was feeling-okay well perhaps the "feeling" part is a bit of a stretch but close enough.**

**Point here was the golden-eyed albino made it a habit to keep an eye out for Ichigo one way or another. Technically spying on the other man was an invasion of privacy but what Ichi didn't know wouldn't kill him. **

**Especially since Shiro himself was as stealthy as a thief in the night and could move around from place to place undetected. **

**On this very night Shiro's "stealth-like skills" weren't necessary because he had a perfect view of his cousin from one of the many windows inside the one of the several hundred guestrooms inside the **_**Drunken Seahorse.**_

**Originally Shiro hadn't planned to spend the night since he shared a cozy not-so-little loft with his green-eyed lover and it seemed kind of ridiculous to crash elsewhere. **

**But Quiorra had bonded with some of the other party guests and Shiro would only be an asshole if he denied the older male a little bonding time with guys his own age.**

**So rather than sulking in the dark, drinking the night away or taking that sexy casino club manager up on his offer to have a 'lil fun' Shiro made himself comfortable right in front of the partially opened window and watched the scene between former rivals unfold.**

**()()**

**The couple sat on the front steps for a long time. Sharing words-well actually Grimm wound up doing most of the talking while Ichi listened, nodded, laughed and scowled. **

**In no particular order. **

**A wide stretched across Shiro's cherry-black painted lips. **

**But really who woulda thought Grimm would turn out to be such a love sick sap? Heh, then again considering the puss was a closet cross-dresser, at this point the bino figured just about anything was possible. **

**()()**

(Ichigo)

"So what took you so long to get here tonight and who was that other guy with the slight pompous European sounding accent?"

Sometimes the best way to fill semi-awkward silence was with small chitchat.

"Would you believe me if I told you he's my estranged half brother?"

Half brother? Orange brows scrunched together. For some reason it was a bit of a difficult concept for Ichigo to wrap his head around. He had no idea Grimmjow had a sibling.

"Seriously?"

"Yep. Same mother, different fathers, you know how it goes."

If Grimmjow's shrugs was anything to go by then it seemed he didn't think much of his half brother.

Then why, Ichigo wondered, had Grimmjow reached out to the guy in the first place? Curiosity? Desperation?

"Not exactly but I get the general idea."

"Good."

Good? Good as in Grimmjow was glad that he understood or good as in that was the only explanation Ichigo was going to get out of the other man?

()

Ichigo and Grimmjow moved at a leisurely pace as they walked towards the parking lot. Silence fell between them once more but this time it wasn't awkward. At least Ichigo didn't think so.

He took the moment to sort through his thoughts.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_SCHOOL DAYS_

_()()_

"_I don't know if this is a good idea Rukia. I mean what if somebody comes along and decides to take a peek inside?"_

_Ichigo would be mortified for life. He was sure of it._

"_Well then they'll be in for a real treat," Rukia's silver-blues twinkled, "And you my dear friend will have conquered the lustful beast within."_

_Ichigo threw Rukia a filthy glare. "Will you stop saying shit like that? Gah! Sometimes I wonder if you really are a girl at all."_

"_What did you say?"_

_The raven-haired girls' silver-blues darkened and narrowed to thin slits just then and she stalked towards the berry with purpose. _

_Ichigo swallowed the invisible lump forming in his throat, he could almost swear her tiny 4'8 frame grew several inches. _

"_Care to repeat that, Ichigo?"_

_He shivered inwardly; sometimes Ichigo forgot that his friend belonged to one of the most formidable families in Karakura Town._

_Seeming to sense his uneasiness, Rukia's face softened a split second later and once more she was wearing a playful teasing grin._

"_You need to stop worrying all the time Ichigo or you're gonna lead yourself straight into an early grave."_

'_**Yeah and somehow even there I doubt I'll find true peace.' **__Ichigo's low grumble was bitter and angry sounding._

_Rukia knocked her shoulder against his, "Cheer up! This won't work if you insist on being all mopey!"_

_Ichigo released a long, suffering sort of sigh and pulled the curtain closed. He couldn't believe he was actually about to go through with his. Couldn't believe he was actually agreeing to Rukia's crazy idea to "relieve" so some tension._

'_**I must be losing it.'**_

"_Yeah, yeah yes yacking more whacking, come on, come on hurry up and drop those pants!"_

_Ichigo hesitated for a moment and raised a brow at the impatient ravenette, "Uh you're not really planning to stand there and watch me the whole time are you?"_

_Rukia rolled her silver blues. "Of course I'm going to watch but only the beginning, once I feel you've shown me enough I'll leave you to your own devices." She stood with her arms crossed over her chest and stomped the heel of her hiking boot, "Now stop stalling and strip!"_

_Ichigo inwardly cursed the story that was his life and reached for his belt buckle._

_He knew Rukia was serious but he still felt weird about it. All teasing jokes aside Rukia was a girl-no she was more than a girl she was more like a sister to him and-_

_Perhaps if he shut his eyes? Sure he could-Ichigo knew his body well enough that he didn't have to watch himself jerk off in order to get off. _

_In fact more often than not the berry's masturbating moments were spent with his eyes closed._

_Of course there was a big difference between those times and here and now-all the other "jack-off-sessions" had taken place in the privacy of his home-not out in the mountains inside of a small tent with one of his best friends just a few feet a way from him and the entire senior class just on the other side of the mountain._

_Anyone could come along at any time and-hell someone could be wandering just outside the tent at this very moment._

_That same someone could jump to the wrong conclusion-could spread rumors-could ask to join?_

_Ichigo wasn't sure which hypothetical scenario was worse._

_As if to mock him, like a bright bolt of lighting, electric blues flashed in his mind and Ichigo shivered for an entirely different reason all together. Eyes open-eyes closed-it didn't matter-the bastard haunted him._

_In fact that was the whole reason Rukia had insisted on "lending a helping hand" in the first place…_

_()()_

_(FLASH BACK WITH IN FLASHBACK)_

_**Earlier that same morning at the breakfast table inside the main lodge right after Rukia had swiped Ichigo's blueberry blintzes off his plate and kicked him in the shin under the table, she demanded to speak to him.**_

'_**We need to talk'**_

_**Rukia sounded uncharacteristically pissy and Ichigo felt baffled. **_

_**He wondered if his friend had simply gotten up on the wrong side of the bed or if she had gotten into a fight with one of the other girls?**_

_**()**_

_**Only to find out that HE was the reason for Rukia's short temper.**_

_**()**_

"_**This is getting out of hand Ichigo. It was interesting-hell even bizarrely cute at first but now…now it's just pathetic. It's making you pathetic and I can't stand it!"**_

_**Yes because rock climbing was so totally and completely the ideal spot for a discussion like this. **_

_**Rukia's small fist slammed into the rock-it must have hurt like hell but the ravenette appeared unfazed.**_

_**Ichigo flinched, whether it was from the fierce look on Rukia's face or the fact that the petite girl had actually broken off a small piece of rock? He couldn't say. **_

_**Ichigo eyed Rukia warily. "Uh Rukia you mind telling me what the hell has got you taking chunks out of the mountain side?"**_

_**A moment's pause…**_

_**Rukia smirked but it wasn't the playful teasing kind his friends usually wore-no this one was colder-dare Ichigo think it was a dead ringer for the facial expression Rukia's older brother, Byakuya, often wore? **_

_**Strange and a little bit unsettling. Ichigo was almost afraid to speak.**_

"_**Uh Ruki-**_

"_**YOU DAMNED IDIOT!"**_

_**Eagles screeched over head-no wait! It was just Rukia.**_

"_**Ichigo this has to stop."**_

"_**Uh what has to stop?"**_

"_**Don't play dumb! You know damn well what I'm referring too."**_

_**Ichigo rolled his neck and shoulders. He really wished they could start moving again. Being stuck in this position (mid climb that is) wasn't exactly comfortable.**_

"_**Uh no, not really. The only thing I know is you're angry at me about something I've done-problem is I'm not sure what I've done that can warrant such anger?"**_

"_**I'm not angry with you, I'm WORRIED FOR YOU!"**_

_**Worried? Ichigo still didn't understand. Why was Rukia worried?**_

_**He tried to reassure his friend. Tried to put her mind at ease with a small smile, "I'm fine Rukia, there's no need to worry."**_

"_**BULLSHIT!" The ravenette screamed just then, her small body shaking, her pale face reddening, tears brimming in the corners of her silver blues-**_

_**Now Ichigo grew alarmed. "Rukia, what is it? What's wrong?"**_

_**Rukia shook her silky raven locks "You're hurting right now Ichigo, my best friend is hurting from the inside out and there's nothing I can do to change that."**_

"_**I-**_

_**What was he supposed to say?**_

"_**Don't try to deny it Ichigo! I heard you last night, two nights ago, hell 3 nights ago and then again this morning before breakfast."**_

"_**Heard what?"**_

_**The question was more automatic then actual curiosity since it had finally dawned on Ichigo-the reason for Rukia's anger/worry/frustration.**_

_**The berry felt his face grow hot and suddenly wished he'd taken Keigo up on the offer to wear a baseball cap- "…"**_

"_**Heard you moaning that bastard's name in your sleep and don't think I've missed the way you still look at him with longing when everyone's back is turned either."**_

_**Ichigo winced and his face became even redder. "You heard all that?" He hadn't realized he had been that loud. Jeez it was a miracle none of his roommates noticed. Well then again Keigo slept like a log, Ishida hadn't been able to make the Senior Trip and Chado slept with his head phones on-still Rukia was…**_

"_**Mmm hmm and I wouldn't care Ichigo-if the circumstances were different."**_

_**Circumstances meaning if the guy Ichigo was still hard core crushing on wasn't a total sleazy asshole who fucked anything with a pulse-no not anything-certainly not him-hence was Ichigo was bitter and angry and pathetic.**_

"_**I-**_

_**Ichigo trailed off and raked his fingers through his sweat-soaked orange locks in frustration, "I don't know what you want me to say Rukia. It's not like I haven't tried to stop thinking about Grimmjow-not like I haven't tried to bury all these damn "feelings" or whatever. Not like I wish it had been me down on my knees at the party-(except for maybe like a second) but only a second! I-I'm not proud but I can't just forget that easily even if I want to. And I do want to forget honestly."**_

_**It was a great speech really and Ichigo could almost believe it-almost. Thankfully Rukia understood or at least she took pity on him.**_

"_**You've got it all backwards Ichigo. Avoiding the problem and the bastard at the heart of the problem won't help you. It will only make you feel like shit or worse than shit. No you need to face it, you need to face him."**_

_**Face Grimmjow? As in talk to the guy? As in make demands that Ichigo knew in his heart he had no right to demand? **_

_**As in looking his bastard rival in the eyes (yes because even if no words passed between them-they would always be rivals) looking straight into Grimmjow's electric blue depths as he had done so many times before and-and then do what exactly?**_

_**Ichigo wasn't a damn coward but what good would talking to Grimmjow do? Not like the overconfident half Canadian would listen to him anyway and again, what right did Ichigo have to question/demand/beg?**_

_**Oh hell no! Absolutely no fucking way would he get down on his knees and beg!**_

"_**I can't face him I can't even nor do I even want to look at him right now."**_

_**Not exactly true Ichigo knew this in his heart-despite everything-it was-things were**_

"_**It's complicated."**_

_**Rukia nodded because she knew.**_

_**()()**_

_**And because Rukia knew it was why she had insisted on carrying out the charade of "the perfect couple" **_

_**()()**_

_**And she played her part well. And Ichigo did his best to do the same. **_

_**()**_

_**And it was because of this charade that no one dared to question it when Ichigo and Rukia wandered off to the other side of the mountain one night in order to get away from everyone else, with only a flashlight, 2 cans of soup, a blanket and a tent.**_

_**()**_

"_Rub one out, rub two out, rub a dozen or as many as it takes, only then will you be able to face him Ichigo."_

_It was fucked up. All of it but then again Ichigo was used to fucked-up-ness…such was the story of his life._

_**And so he did…Ichigo shut his eyes out to the rest of the world-shut his ears to the sound of his shameless friend's "encouragement"-ignored his inner conscience who was calling him 'the biggest fucking fool in history' and let his dirty little fantasies carry him away…**_

_**()()**_

_**FLASH END**_

_**()()**_

_**RESUME PRESENT DAY/NIGHT**_

_**(Ichigo)**_

"Ichigo!"

"Huh? Oh! Uh-

Grimmjow was grinning. "Something on your mind Ichigo? You seem very far away-I almost didn't want to disturb you but-

Banishing his memories to a place better left revisited at a different place and time Ichigo turned to Grimmjow, "But what?"

"Any chance I can convince you to give me a ride home? No funny business, I swear."

No funny business? Ichigo studied Grimmjow's face for a few minutes. Doubtful but it was a nice try. He could appreciate the effort the other man was attempting to make.

Still…it didn't mean he would say yes-right away-no he felt like playing a little bit first.

"Hmm let me think about that."

In truth Ichigo made up his mind the moment the question had left Grimmjow's mouth. But their connection wouldn't be what it was if he didn't pretend to be a little stubborn.

(…)

(…)

"Fair enough."

And once again Ichigo marveled at how much the other had changed.

He grinned, full on grinned up at Grimmjow and then grabbed the other man's hand, brought it up to his mouth and kissed it. "Okay I've thought about it long enough, my answer is yes."

Grimmjow's electric blue brow twitched but his eyes twinkled with mirth. Seems he wasn't offended by the way Ichigo had treated him like a chick just now.

"Thanks."

Honestly it was no big deal. In truth Ichigo wasn't in any hurry to return home. "Don't mention it." He let go of Grimmjow's hand and turned only to be halted by a warm palm pressing on his shoulder.

Ichigo hesitated for a second-but only a second before looking back and locking his cinnamon-coffee gaze with electric blues.

"No really, _thank you."_ Grimmjow repeated.

Not a trace of mischief or hidden agenda was found in Grimmjow's tone or on his face. Only complete sincerity.

Ichigo felt not just his face but also his heart grow warm. He realized in that moment that there was much deeper, far greater meaning in Grimmjow's "thanks"

In a way it was as if he was truly seeing the other man for the first time.

'_Just when I thought-'_

"Huh, they got it all wrong."

Grimmjow cocked his head to the side "Whose they?"

Ichigo resisted the urge to reach for the other man and kiss him once more and answered, "People have often told me that I'm an enigma but they've got it all backwards, the real enigma is _**you**__."_

For the second time that night Grimmjow's chiseled cheeks went slightly pink. After a moment or two he "collected" himself and growled out "Haaaah? What the hell are you babbling about now strawberry princess?!"

Ichigo grinned but didn't bother to elaborate. Grimmjow wasn't the dumb ass so many mistook him for he'd figure it out on his own. All in good time.

"Never mind, come on we're almost there."

()

Grimmjow didn't protest when Ichigo grabbed hold of his hand (once more) and dragged him through the parking lot.

The berry figured that it probably meant his blue-haired companion was lost in thought. Or maybe he was trying to figure out the best way to get him to drop his pants?

One never could tell with Grimmjow.

But if Ichigo were going to be completely honest with him self he was kind of looking forward to it.

Yet at the same time why the hell should he wait for Grimmjow to make another move when the ball was quite clearly in his court?

()()

(Grimmjow)

"Mind if I smoke?"

Normally Grimmjow wouldn't even bother asking but he was trying to be more respectful-after all you showed respect towards the one you loved, right?

Still…Ichigo wasn't aware of this fact because Grimmjow hadn't worked up the nerve to tell his berry yet. Of course not! It was too soon much too soon and-

"Since when do you ask if it's okay to smoke around me?" Ichigo snorted. "Worried for my health and well being all of a sudden?"

And even though Grimmjow knew it was stupid to act all irrational and get all bent out of a shape over such a little thing, he couldn't help the snapping snarl that slipped out just then, "Hey I was just trying out the polite thing, don't go reading any deeper into then that!"

Hurt flashed in the berry's cinnamon-coffee depths before he masked it over with indifference and rolled down the windows.

But it was too late. Quick like fire or not-Grimmjow hadn't missed it and now he felt like an asshole.

Shit he really hadn't mean to-it was just…well couldn't Ichigo be a little more appreciative and proud of his efforts to behave like a gentleman?

Hah! Gentleman? Grimmjow Jeagerjaques would never be a gentleman but he could behave better than the brainless Neanderthal Szayel sometimes accused him of being.

"Listen Ichigo about what I said just now I didn't mean-

The berry shook his head and cut Grimmjow off "It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does," Grimmjow started to protest, tried to explain him self or at least attempt an apology but Ichigo cut him off once again.

"No it doesn't matter. I mean I figure even if we make it to the bedroom some night there will still be moments where I'm either pissing you off by being all uptight and overdramatic or you're pissing me off by being rude and crude." A shrug, "But its fine because it's what makes us who we are, doesn't it?"

Yeah that was true-point well made but still…

"Wait! Some night? Just how long do you intend to make me wait?"

"Hmm, that is a good question." Ichigo's tone turned playful as he reached to unbuckle his seat belt, climbed over to the passenger side and planted his perfect ass right in Grimmjow's lap, much to his surprised delight.

Grimmjow thought about abandoning his cigarette but the damn things weren't cheap and he had already lost one earlier so instead…he would be mindful of the orange berry in his lap and wait to see what Ichigo had in store for him.

Orange brows furrowed together, Ichigo squirmed and Grimmjow chuckled and teased, "Comfortable?"

The berry scrunched up his nose, "No not really but I'll deal with it because I want to try something so just-

Grimmjow quirked an electric brow, "Oh? And what exac-?"

Slim fingers pressed against his lips muffling the rest of his sentence/question. Brown eyes found blue and Ichigo whispered, "Shhh just finish your smoke and let me-

And the squirming and shifting commenced.

Grimmjow didn't really know why but he found the entire thing amusing and quipped, "Well I know its not kissing you're about to try 'cuz you've already done that so that can only mean you're about to-

Brown eyes flashed with warning and annoyance and Ichigo hissed out "I thought I told you to Shhhh!"

Electric blues blazed, "Keep putting your finger in my face and next time I'll bite it," Grimmjow's trademark Cheshire cat like grin gleamed in the moonlight as he purred out, "But you'd secretly enjoy that, wouldn't you_ Ichigo_?"

Ichigo responded by blushing, shivering and squirming in his lap. Grimmjow decided that he really needed to hurry up the hell up and finish his cigarette so he could properly fondle his berry once more.

But the berry, it seemed, had something else in mind.

Suddenly Ichigo was rising up and out of Grimmjow's lap and-well he had no complaints/objections to having the berry's jean-clad crotch in his face but-

()()

(Ichigo)

Ichigo ignored Grimmjow's muffled…

"_Wha-mmph!?"_ question and moved into a half stand, then bent over the seat and searched around in the back for a small box.

He hadn't even planned on using the box when Shiro and Ulquiorra first gave it to him but then he figured-what the hell why not? What was the point in continuing the night with Grimmjow if he wasn't going to allow himself to have some _real _fun?

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow decided 'what the hell why not make the most of having a crotch in his face?' instead of bitching about it?

So using the kind of skills that had taken him quite a few years to master, Grimmjow tore at the button on Ichigo's jeans with his teeth and tongue-and then following the same/similar steps he pulled down the zipper on Ichigo's jeans and licked at the obvious wet spot on the other man's striped underwear.

"Oi! Oi Oi what the hell do you think you're," a sucked in sharp breath/hiss "Stop that!"

Grimmjow probably would have stopped if Ichigo really truly wanted him to stop but it was quite obvious to Grimmjow that his berry didn't really want him to stop.

The way the all too noticeable slight budge still concealed in tight briefs swelled under his ministrations with just a little bit of light teasing-and his tongue hadn't even made contact with Ichigo's bare skin yet?

_Yeah that pretty much said it all. _

If Grimmjow stopped now he'd only be torturing the both of them. And why do something like that?

()

(Ichigo)

Or at least that had been the plan...leave it to his former rival to beat him to the punch…_**the bastard.**_

()()

(Grimmjow)

Things only got better when his strawberry princess let go and started making delightful little moans and half pants-

Grimmjow felt encouraged and empowered. Though he knew he could only take things so far...that didn't stop him from bending the rules just a little bit-

And why?

Because that's the kind of guy that Grimmjow was.

()()

(Ichigo)

Not that the bastard escaped unscathed…because he didn't. In fact the moment Ichigo came down from his high he let Grimmjow have it!

And as a result Grimmjow was now sporting quite a nasty shiner and Ichigo's already throbbing fist throbbed even more.

Perhaps he should visit the ER before heading home?

()()

()

()

(Grimmjow)

"So are you sure you don't want to reconsider and continue where we left off?"

Grimmjow threw Ichigo a sideways grin as they walked up to the front of the emergency room-after a fair amount of griping and groaning he'd been able to convince his strawberry to let him tag along with the promise that he would be on his best behavior and keep his hands to himself.

Not exactly the easiest task but Grimmjow was confident that he'd manage.

All he desired at this moment was spending more time with Ichigo even if it meant waiting around endlessly for the other's name to be called.

()()

TBC


	23. CHAPTER FIFTEEN

**Disclaimer: The sun, the moon, the stars and KUBO-SENSEI!**

A/N Now in an ideal world things like STD's and such would not exist and normally I don't make mentions of such unpleasant things in my fics however it seemed kind of necessary considering that I've basically written Grimmjow's character as a manwhore in this. Ichigo's concerns are perfectly normal and necessary. It's a short chapter but I promise the next one will be long.

ENJOY!

Dedicated to Ane-chan

**THANK YOU TO ALL READERS/REVIEWERS AND SUPPORTERS OF DRUNKEN SEAHORSE. **

**AU, OOC, GRIMMxICHI, ERRORS AND SO ON….**

**()()**

_**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**_

CHAPTER 15

(Grimmjow)

In all honesty Grimmjow hated emergency rooms, hospitals, doctors offices or any type of building that reeked heavily of death, urine and antiseptic but especially the smell of death.

It reminded him too much of his mother, she would have been 49 this year were she still alive.

Even after all the time that had passed it still hadn't fully sunk in.

The fact that she would never open her ocean blue eyes to the world ever again-the fact that she would never smack him over the head with her curling iron when he was being a smart ass-the fact that she would never be there to witness as he exchanged his wedding vows at the alter-the fact that she would never get to call her self grandmother to all the little rug rats he fully intended to adopt with Ichigo.

Grimmjow really wasn't the type of guy to bitch and whine but life really did flat out just suck hardcore sometimes.

_She hadn't been perfect. Not by a long shot. His mother had had a gambling problem and a shameless appetite for younger men._

_His father had been 10 years younger._

_A small town boy working in a family run auto shop, it was during the late month of July when a goddess peaked her head inside of the shop looking for someone to fix her flat tire. She charmed him instantly with her sharp wit and unearthly beauty. _

_He fixed her tire and had given her an oil change free of charge or so the story went._

_One thing led to another and it turned out that the small town boy had bigger and better dreams rather than wasting away in his old man's garage. He wanted to be a rock star. Rather than laugh at him the goddess vowed that she would do everything in her power to help him get there but first he had to help her get rid of a certain "itch" she couldn't scratch._

_One time. All it took was that one time and wedding bells quickly followed._

_During the first couple of years they were happy. Everything was rainbows and butterflies but then one day out of the blue the small town boy (now a man) decided he just couldn't take it anymore._

'_You're holding me back, you and that kid. Both of you have ruined my life'_

And just like that he was gone.

It was sickening cliché, all of it really but sometimes life was just that-a big fucking cliché.

Of course Grimmjow hadn't learned all the nitty gritty details until he reached his 18th year and by then it didn't matter.

Didn't change a damn thing.

His mother was a shameless whore and it didn't matter because deep down even with out Yama-jii shedding some light on things Grimmjow had some how always known.

Knew there had to be a bigger picture that he was missing.

Knew there had to be a bigger reason behind all of the running and the fleeing to different countries year after year.

During Yama-jii's long-winded speech Grimmjow had learned that his mother's insatiable appetite had gotten the best of her.

Learned that the woman had foolishly gotten involved with a kid fresh out of high school and convinced the guy to steal money from his father. Not just loose change or few measly bills but billions of dollars.

Thinking about it pissed Grimmjow off even now.

A part of him deeply resented his mother for everything that she'd put him through (even if she was convinced it was in his best interest-that she had made all the choices because she wanted only the best for her little boy) but still whore or not she shouldn't have died.

If Grimmjow closed his eyes he could swear he could see his mother during her final hours.

_Picture it as though it only happened yesterday-her eyes once a beautiful ocean blue now deep and sunken into her face, barely recognizable. Her skin, cold and clammy, her lips bruised and purple-_

Grimmjow ground his teeth together and clenched his fists tightly.

Fuck he really hated hospitals.

"You've grown really quiet all of a sudden and your front brows are crinkling and you're grinding your teeth, what's wrong?"

Electric blues slid open and Grimmjow turned to look at Ichigo and was almost instantly warmed at the concerned look on the younger man's face. He considered how he should go about answering the question and decided that honesty was his best option.

After all he'd made a promise that he would no longer lie to his strawberry princess and he be damned if he went back on his words.

Besides if anyone had the right to know about his sudden mood change it was Ichigo.

"Nothin' I just hate places like this. I mean I know they are necessary and everything but the smell alone makes me wanna fuckin' gag!"

Ichigo nodded his head as if he understood what Grimmjow was trying to tell him even with out getting a full explanation.

Orange brows furrowed together tightly for a moment or so and then suddenly the berry princess snapped his fingers together as if a brilliant idea had suddenly come to him.

He scooted closer to Grimmjow and rested his head against his shoulder much in the same way he'd done earlier that night.

"If the smell of this place is bothering you, why don't you focus on a _different_ smell?"

Grimmjwo quirked a brow and felt his lips curl. He did not miss the teasing lilt in Ichigo's tone just then. "You offering to be my distraction, _Ichigo?"_

For a second it looked as if the other man might be regretting his words but only for a split second.

The time for games was over. There was only room for honesty and comfort now. His berry had picked up on his foul mood and was graciously offering him self up.

Grimmjow would be a GD idiot if he let such an opportunity pass him by.

He made a mental note to thank his not so little princess for all the wonderful gifts he bestowed upon him tonight and then pulled Ichigo into his lap, mindful of his injured fist of course, and proceeded to just nip and lick and suck every inch of peachy-toned flesh he could access without having to strip the other out of his clothes.

Not that the thought wasn't tempting because it was but Grimmjow rather not have everything back fire on him.

He had a feeling Ichigo would never forgive him if they were arrested for indecent exposure-plus despite all of Grimmjow's kinkier and twisted fantasies about operating tables and latex gloves and other fun toys there was nothing remotely hot about sexing his berry up right in front of a creepy old drunk with a mouthful of missing teeth and piss and shit stains on his clothes.

So yes and a simple nipping and kissing session was more than enough of a distraction for now.

And Grimmjow was confident in his abilities, if he played his cards right he would be able to convince Ichigo to spend the night.

Then instead of racing half way across town at daybreak and picking his berry up in front of his house with his entire family watching and settling for some shitty little Western-inspired diner with over priced pancakes Ichigo could lounge around his king size bed while he was down in the kitchen preparing breakfast.

He had no doubt in his mind that his princess would love 'Omelette a' la Jeager'.

Choosing to move out after high school had ended, Grimmjow had had no other choice but to pick up a few cooking techniques along the way.

He'd never be a Crocker or a Stewart type but he could make one hell of an omelet.

And if he accidentally slipped a non-traceable aphrodisiac type of powder or liquid in the sausages well he could always blame it on Halibel.

The blonde would surely have his left testicle if she ever discovered what he was plotting.

And when Ichigo found out? Well sure the other man would be pissed at first but he'd get over it.

Grimmjow mentally kicked himself the moment he realized just how stupid and juvenile his inner thoughts sounded. Tricking Ichigo was _not _the way to gain his trust even if it was all in the name of lust and love.

The wounds were still too fresh. Too raw.

Playing a prank like that would be like taking ten giant leaps backwards. And Grimmjow had no desire to go backward he only wanted to move forward.

He snarled as he continued to inwardly wage a war with himself. He wanted to change but it wasn't that simple. He couldn't turn off the bastard horn ball that easily.

"Oi lighten up a bit on the pressure would ya? I'd like to be able to go home with out having to answer a bunch of questions about all these dark marks your leaving on my neck."

Just because he could Grimmjow bit down harder into the bruised flesh before letting up and soothing over the large welts with his tongue.

"Their called love bites and you should wear them proudly."

"Hmph that so? Well if you think for one second that I'm not going to get you back for this, you are dead wrong."

A challenge. Oh how Grimmjow so did love a challenge.

He detached his lips from Ichigo's heated skin and locked eyes with the other man then brushed their noses together and purred out, "Do your worst strawberry princess."

Cinnamon and coffee brown eyes flashed and Ichigo's mouth twitched at the corners, "Don't worry I will," he curled his good hand around Grimmjow's blue locks tugging on them lightly, "But it will be when you least expect it."

Electric blues narrowed and Grimmjow growled out a warning, "Careful Ichigo don't try to bite off more than you can chew."

Although truthfully he was more excited than anything. Grimmjow knew it was only a matter of time.

He knew that under the many layers of the shy, awkward and insecure kitten there was a hot and horny little minx scratching and clawing and slowly bit-by-bit making its way out to the surface.

"I'm always careful," Ichigo's current smirk could rival Grimmjow's own at the moment as he teasingly added "But who said anything about biting?"

()()

(Ichigo)

For the most part Ichigo was bluffing. Well not bluffing exactly for he did have a plan of sorts but whether or not he would be able to pull off said plan without having it backfiring on him was something else entirely.

He was still pretty clueless about a lot of things and it didn't matter how many crash courses Shiro and Ulquiorra had given him on the 'art of seduction' or 'proper game play', becoming a confident lover would take time.

It would take practice and a whole lot of errors and fumbling before Ichigo got it right.

And if history was anything to go by Grimmjow might not want to wait around until Ichigo got it right.

Ichigo didn't think the guy would be so cruel as to drop him like deadweight after everything they'd been through but Grimmjow might find it difficult to agree to a strictly monogamous relationship.

Even if the other man had deep feelings for him, it was just a cold hard fact of life. Men were built to plow as many fields as possible. Plant his seed and watch it grow. Even though the very notion irritated the living hell out of Ichigo and sickened him to the core the fact remained.

Grimmjow was a manwhore.

He'd probably slept with the majority of Karakura Town and its neighboring cities and towns-not to mention all the people the guy had slept with when he was away overseas.

As much as Ichigo's heart twisted and ached at the thought that there was a possibility that somewhere out in the world a random broad (or several) might be knocked up and carrying Grimmjow's baby or babies, he had to think about these kind of things.

He had to mentally prepare himself for all scenarios. And had to psychically protect himself.

It was part of the reason Ichigo had made the decision to visit the emergency room in order to get his hand checked out.

He figured he could kill two birds with one stone-while he was getting his hand ex-rayed Grimmjow could go down to one of the other rooms and get tested.

And if it would make the other man feel better Ichigo would get tested too. Actually considering what a loose floosie Circucci had been it was best that he get tested.

And then from there well…

"Oi princess the doc's been calling you name for the past 10 minutes!"

Ichigo jumped up and out of Grimmjow's lap.

Mentally berated him self for getting so lost in his thoughts and ignored the curious/disturbed look on the doctor's face and followed the middle aged woman into the next room with out a word.

TBC


	24. CHAPTER SIXTEEEN

**Disclaimer: Oh how I miss the days where I could simply type in UKE (and the character name of my choosing) in the search bar and countless fanfiction results would come up. Sighs…anyway that has nothing to do with anything…as always I am not Kubo-sensei!**

**For Ane-chan: Thanks for jumping back on the ship…better late then never.**

**THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR ENCOURAGING REVIEWS AND CONTINUED SUPPORT: Ane-chan, Cas, Narutopokefan, Hollow-Ichigo-Ichigo  
**

**Welcome new readers and followers!**

A/N Honestly I'm not sure anymore how long this fic will be…my mind keeps changing…at first it was supposed to finish at like 20 then I though maybe 25 or 30…then I thought maybe 18…I don't know…guess it all depends where my brain takes me to…I have a general idea mind you its just…some times I decide to run with a different angle then I originally planned on…Oh and I don't know anything about medical related things…so its mainly bs and dialogue…yeah anyway I've ramble long enough let's get to the reason you're still here…

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, DIALOGUE and grammatical errors and It's been a while but I feel the need to remind you the readers…that yes this fic entails mentions of cross-dressing and so on…

()()

_**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**_

CHAPTER 16

(Ichigo)

"So what happened here?"

Ichigo didn't want to outright lie to the doctor as she examined his hand but he wasn't sure the entire truth would be the best idea either so he settled for the half-truth.

"I was having a heated argument with a friend and we got a little carried away."

The plump heavy rouge faced middle-aged doctor raised a brow, "Carried away you say? And where is this friend of yours now?"

"I'm right here." Grimmjow announced as suddenly appeared in the doorway. Ichigo wasn't sure if this could be considered a good thing or a bad thing.

"Missing me already were you?"

It had been less than 5 minutes but in a way Ichigo supposed he was kind of flattered. He continued on, tone light and teasing, "Can't stand to be separated from me?"

"Something like that princess," with a wide grin Grimmmjow stepped the rest of the way inside the room and sat in the only available chair. "So how's he doing, doc?"

The doctor only hesitated a moment before answering, "Well luckily for you both it's just a light sprain." Then she turned her complete attention back to Ichigo and added, "I'll give you a prescription that should take the swelling down and lessen the pain.

"So you're not going to take any ex-rays?"

"I don't really see a need for one since you seem to be able to flex and move your hand well enough but-

"But?" Ichigo never liked the sound of 'but' in a sentence.

"But what doc? Don't leave us hanging in suspense."

Ichigo shot Grimmjow an annoyed half glare and hissed, "I can handle this myself you just sit there and be quiet!"

"Heh, what makes you think I'm going to take orders from you all of a sudden, eh Ichigo?"

"Gentleman _please _this is_ NOT _the place nor time to start another argument."

"Sorry." Ichigo bowed his head lowly suddenly feeling like a scolded child.

"Che," Grimmjow scoffed and kicked off one of his boots and had the gall to smirk at Ichigo.

Ichigo would have scowled even deeper at the other man but he was a bit distracted by the royal purple socks.

"Whatever anyway doc so you planin' on finishing your sentence or you gonna keep us guessing all night long?"

The doctor crossed her meaty arms over her large chest and glared at Grimmjow. "You need to mind your manners or I'll force you to step outside."

Grimmjow grumbled lowly under his breath and Ichigo shook his head and refocused his complete attention on the doctor.

"If it will make you feel better we can schedule an ex-ray as an extra precaution but it is my honest opinion that you should be just fine. My only advice to you is not to overwork your hand or lift heavy objects for a while," her lips quirked up a bit. "In other words avoid getting into any more fights."

Ichigo nodded. It sounded simple enough and if he still had any slight doubts he could just get a second opinion from his father when he went back home.

The doctor jotted down a few notes on a clipboard and then asked, "Is there anything else I can do for you, young man?"

Ichigo looked over at Grimmjow debating about whether or not he should just "go ahead and ask the question" while the other man was in the room. He knew there was a chance Grimmjow might get pissed off and storm out but he was really hoping his former rival would instead just show him once again how much their years apart had changed him.

It was wishful thinking at best.

"Well I know this might come off sounding a bit out of left field and you probably have other patients to attend to but I was just wondering if it would be possible to get tested?"

The doctor set aside her clip board and pulled off her bi-focals and squinted her eyes at Ichigo, "What kind of test are you referring to?"

"Um well-" Ichigo's eyes darted off the woman's face and around the room. He mentally scolded himself for acting so cowardly. It was a perfectly natural question. He had nothing to be shy about.

In fact getting tested or inquiring about getting tested for STD's was a good thing-isn't that what they always preached on the radio and the television?

He glanced over at Grimmjow once again noting the other man's blue brows were furrowed together in a harsh line.

Perhaps he should skip it and come back on a different day or schedule an appointment with his primary care doctor? Maybe he should discuss a few things with Grimmjow first? Voice his concerns and have a serious heart to heart like two civilized adults should?

Sure the topic of STD's and other such things lacked romance but Ichigo knew he would feel much better about everything if he was assured that both he and Grimmjow had a clean bill of health.

"Would it be easier for you to talk about it if your friend stepped outside for a few minutes?"

"Well er no not exactly that is-I mean uh he's uh part of it and-it's kind of yeah he should be here to listen too."

The doctor looked at Ichigo strangely but the berry ignored it and pushed forward, "I recently broke up with my girlfriend and although we never actually had full-blown sex she was a bit er fast I guess you could say?"

Well it wasn't a lie per se-

"An uh-

"Stop beating around the bush and just spit it out Ichigo!"

The growling command and flashing of electric blues made him flinch and then frown.

And Ichigo did not miss as Grimmjow's chiseled jaw visibly tightened. '_**Great if he's already irritated by this much then he'll completely lose his shit when I-**_

"FUCK IT! I'll do it for you," with a scrape of a chair, Grimmjow stood up and walked over, passing a silent message to Ichigo in that instant and the berry was gonna assume it translated to something roughly along the lines of _'Let me get this'_

"Listen doc I think you could pretty much conclude everything for yourself the very second you found us rubbing up on each other out in the waiting room." Grimmjow put one of his long well muscled arms around and Ichigo and pulled him closely completely ignoring the younger man's scowl he continued,

"We like having sex, a lot of sex and have very little use for things like condoms. But you see doc a few days ago I got piss ass drunk and stuck my dick in someone else so as you can guess Ichigo is not too happy about it and thinks it would be best if we both get tested."

Less than a moment later Ichigo felt Grimmjow's lips brush the side of his temple and suddenly felt like an even bigger idiot.

'_**How could I have thought so little of-how could I have shown so little faith in him when he clearly-?**_

Well on the bright side at least he wasn't blushing like the virgin he was at the moment.

Ichigo glanced up at Grimmjow, enjoying the other's perfect side profile for the moment before moving his gaze upward in order to analyze the current look blazing in electric blues.

Completely serious. Focused.

'I_** don't think I've ever seen him look so serious or focused in all the years that I've know him'**_

'_**He's really trying to prove himself'**_

Yes that had to be it. It couldn't have been easy-indeed it probably wounded Grimmjow's pride admitting to such a thing.

Granted he'd gone about telling it in a round about sort of way (as per his typical style) but it was effective and left no room for confusion or questions.

The doctor laughed lightly just then as if amused. "I'll never understand why young people are such nervous wrecks about getting tested or taking precautions and yet you don't even so much as blink at the act or mention of sex itself."

()()

(Grimmjow)

Grimmjow knew this "issue" was gonna come up sooner or later but much like the whole 'Abarai-party episode' he had hoped that he could at least go on a few dates with his berry princess before his man-whorish ways were brought into question.

Not that he really should have expected anything different because Ichigo was nothing if not cautious. Always had been and probably always would be.

It was for the best in the long run, Grimmjow decided, in order to have a real long term forever lasting relationship with the other man being cautious and careful was or rather it should be a necessity.

And so with out missing a beat he basically went right ahead and broadcasted his shameless ways to the doctor currently standing in front of them and okay maybe he added in a few things like how the other man (Ichigo) was just as much of a sex addict as he himself was but- something told Grimmjow that he had made the right decision and the proper direction to take.

He doubted very highly that Ichigo would have approved if he went and told the woman the truth-that there was only one sex addict and the other was a painfully suppressed unsure virgin.

His berry would have probably kicked his ass all the way back to Canada and- yeah it could have been quite an ugly scene.

And although Ichigo was plenty pretty even when he was at his ugliest, Grimmjow preferred to see the other man smile rather than scowl at this point.

It had been a long night and rather than have things end on a sour note Grimmjow wanted things to end on a happy note.

"So I guess the only real question remaining now doc is when can we get tested and how long do we have to wait for the results?"

"Technically that's two questions," the woman's dark eyes sparkled and Ichigo chuckled lightly beside him.

"She's right, it is two questions."

He did not like being corrected. He did not like being corrected.

Grimmjow absolutely positively DID NOT LIKE BEING CORRECTED!

Ichigo knew this better than anyone and yet the little bastard went ahead and did it anyway.

Grimmjow gnawed on the side of his cheek in irritation and then snapped out. "Tch! Anyway answers doc!"

"Well in answer to your first question, you can get tested at any time even tonight if that is your wish. And as for how long it will take for the results? A week maybe a little over, the blood samples usually have to be sent to the lab in the next town over and that takes awhile."

"Heh, I expected as much, well don't see a reason to drag this out anymore than necessary so-" Grimmjow rolled up his sleeve "Hurry up and draw my blood or whatever!"

"_**Grimmjow**__!"_

Hmm it was difficult to tell if Ichigo was alarmed, annoyed or protesting at the moment.

"What Ichigo, what is it?"

"You can't just go and demand her to take your blood! You probably have to fill out papers or pay a fee first or something, you idiot!"

Electric blues flashed with warning not that it had any real effect at this point in time. "Don't call me an idiot! Simply telling me to slow down or stop is enough, _princess_."

"Gentleman please there is no need to get so worked up. If you're absolutely sure you want to do this now then I advise you to take a seat and I'll call one of the nurses."

It seemed a bit stupid. The woman was a doctor wasn't she? So shouldn't she be more than capable of taking their blood.

She probably just wanted an excuse to get away from them.

'_**We're probably driving her crazy'**_ Grimmjow grinned. He couldn't help it. '_**We tend to have that effect on most people.'**_

()()

(Ichigo)

"You keep looking at me when your eyes should be on the road, what's the problem princess?"

Ichigo hadn't tried to be so obvious about it.

Staring was rude-he knew this and yet he just couldn't help himself. His eyes kept being drawn back to the scarred tissue on Grimmjow's arm. The color had lightened over the years but it still looked pretty painful.

He wondered if the other man felt pain or numbness or a tingling sensation or a variation of all three from time to time.

Just like Ichigo had wished to do so back in high school he felt like doing so now, desired to press his lips to the raised flesh. He only held back because what if the action angered Grimmjow?

Although things had changed, some things had stayed the same. The half Canadian was still short tempered and easily offended. He might misinterpret the kiss to be like a sign of pity or sadness or something.

Ichigo didn't feel any of these things when he looked at the scarred flesh. He only felt an even greater and deeper love for the man sitting in the passenger seat next to him.

Grimmjow's imperfections were true perfection in Ichigo's eyes.

"Seriously you keep that up, I'm gonna grab the keys from you and drive."

It was meant to be taken as more of warning rather than an actual threat but evening knowing this ichigo couldn't help but break sharply and shift into park.

The road was thankfully more or less deserted save one or two cars up ahead. It didn't matter.

"How would you feel if I licked you?"

"_Heh_," Cheshire cat like grin easily made its way on to Grimmjow's face, "Where exactly do you wish to _lick_ me Ichigo?"

Ichigo almost felt like reaching across and slapping Grimmjow but that would only lead to another detour and he didn't have the energy for any more detours tonight. So he plowed ahead and silently prayed for the best, "Honestly I'd like to lick your arm."

Grimmjow quirked a brow, "My arm?" and then he chuckled. "You really are a one of a kind, aren't you princess?"

"I'm serious."

"Yes I realize that and hell I'm not gonna stop you but before you do it I wanna know why."

"You wanna know why I want to lick your arm?"

"Yeah I wanna know why Ichigo and don't try to distract me either."

"What? I wouldn't do something like that!"

"Oh I think you would because you fear what my reaction to your answer will be."

Well there was no sense in denying it. If it made Grimmjow uncomfortable then Ichigo mentally vowed in that moment that he would never bring it up or attempt it again.

"I want to lick your arm because-

Ichigo trailed off asking himself again if he could really say it-maybe he should-no-no he should say it. He needed to say it!

"I want to lick your arm because its perfectly imperfect and more importantly its part of you and you can call me stupid or a sap if you want to but I feel like licking your scar will strip some of the pain away."

"I don't feel any pain in this arm anymore."

Despite his words Ichigo did not miss Grimmjow's slight flinch.

"You say that but I don't buy it. Not because I think you're lying or trying to be tough but because something like that doesn't happen everyday. I can't even imagine the amount of shock, fear, pain and god knows what else was going through your mind in that moment on that day but I feel I might grasp some what of a better understanding if I feel the scarred flesh move under my tongue."

Grimmjow clenched and unclenched his jaw. "So basically what you're trying to tell me here is you want to lick my scarred up arm because you're convinced that your tongue has some type of magical healing properties, is that it?"

Ichigo scowled viciously. Was Grimmjow really cracking jokes about something so-?

"No! That's not it at all! I just I-

Ichigo trailed off again and pinched the skin between his orange brows with his fingers. This shouldn't be so difficult. It really shouldn't be.

"You-?" Grimmjow prompted, tone sounding only mildly impatient.

Ichigo took his hand off his face and turned to look at Grimmjow.

"Look I know you're more of an action guy-hands on approach works better for you and uh that's fine but I'm trying to show you how I feel about you in my own way since I truthfully am not all that great with words either and-

"Alright enough! Just stop trying to embarrass the both of us and get your ass outta that seat and in my lap! I promise I'll be good and let you lick me all night long if that's what you really want." It came out like more of a growling command then anything but Ichigo would take what he could get.

Ichigo unbuckled his seat belt and climbed into Grimmjow's lap but rather than diving right in and tasting scarred flesh he looked deeply into the other man's deep blue depths and whispered three words.

()()

(Grimmjow)

Well, now what? His berry princess had beaten him to the punch. Whispered three powerful words before they'd even gone on an official date.

Of course one could argue that all their moments during their "high school days" was dating in an unconventional kind of way. But-

Should he say them back?

Would Ichigo even take him seriously if he did or would the berry be offended and jump to the wrong kind of conclusion and accuse Grimmjow of mocking him?

'_**Nah. He'll believe me I've already technically put my heart on the table tonight-multiple times. I made a total ass of myself in front of hundreds of people and then again outside when he drilled me about all that past bullshit with Abarai. **_

_**Not to mention back in the ER-I coulda walked out at any moment. I coulda told Ichigo to take his insecurities and his questions and his tests and shove em' straight up his perfect ass. **_

_**Course I'd much rather shove my dick up his perfect ass but he's made it more than clear that he's not quite ready to take that leap. **_

_**I don't want him to think that I'm saying the words back in the hopes that he'll surrender. Even if I did that would just be 50 shades of fucked up and I can't do that. **_

_**Not now. Not after all the progress we've made tonight. Fuck! It sure has been a long night hasn't it?**_

_**I can see how red his eyes have become-Ichigo should stop being so damn stubborn and just come and crash at my place.'**_

()()

"Come home with me."

Blink. Blink. Blink.

"What are you talking about? I'm not coming home with you, we've already discussed this hours ago I'll see you tomorrow for brunch."

"Ichigo don't make me beg. I'm so not sexy when I'm begging-hell I can barely even stand to look at myself in the mirror when I'm reduced to begging."

True. Begging wasn't sexy. Yet ironically enough even as Grimmjow said these words, it came out sounding very much like a plea much to his annoyance.

Ichigo either took pity on him or decided that all he really wished to do was crash because he agreed after only a moment of silence.

"Fine I'll crash at your place but I'll warn you now that I kick and punch in my sleep so don't get too close or you might not be able to piss properly for a month." There was a dark glint in cinnamon and coffee eyes and teasing half grin pulling at his berry's peach tinted mouth, so Grimmjow knew Ichigo wasn't just blowing a lot of hot air.

"I'll take the floor or the couch, you can sleep in my bed with my second best friend."

An orange brow was raised, "Second best friend?"

Grimmjow grinned. "I'm not gonna tell you, you'll know soon enough when we get there."

He couldn't wait to see the expression on the other man's face when he saw "it".

()

Now back behind the wheel Ichigo's eyes stayed on the road. "Stop distracting me and just tell me where you live."

Grimmjow reclined the passenger seat in order to rest his head and recited, "Six blocks west of the museum of all things grand, historic and unforgettable."

Ichigo looked thoughtful for a moment and then laughed lightly. "I still can't believe I got locked in there with you back then-how could everyone just forget about us like that? It still doesn't make any sense to me."

Electric blues twinkled but Ichigo's eyes were still fully focused on the road so he completely missed it.

"Well I could tell you something about that day that you aren't aware but before I do you have to promise not to get your panties in a twist."

Ichigo used the red light in order to shoot Grimmjow a glare. "I don't wear panties but since you apparently _love _to talk about them so much I'm beginning to think you have some sort of fetish or something."

Heh, his strawberry princess wasn't too far off. Practically hit the marker.

"Not exactly it would be more accurate to say that I have an appreciation for panties."

"Appreciation?"

Ichigo snorted and Grimmjow decided why hide it? His berry princess was sure to find out about his "cross-dressing" ways soon enough. Especially if his powdered cousin had anything to do with it so yeah better now then latar.

"Panties are hot and sexy. Hot to touch, hot to look at and yes even hot to wear. Not that I give a damn about what others think or anything like that but I prefer not to broadcast it-contrary to what I've lead you to believe all these years Ichigo, I value my privacy."

"I-

And just like that the berry clamped up and grew silent. Grimmjow had a feeling he'd probably said too much too soon.

'_**Fuck!'**_

Yes fuck is right. He'd gone and fucked everything up. If his mother were still alive she'd knock him upside down and side ways and then some.

That was the second time he thought of her tonight.

'_**I should really go pay my respects-it's been a while.'**_

Grimmjow shook his head. Best to stay focused on one thing rather than multiple things.

Once more another set of floodgates had opened and there was no turning back.

"I guess my fascination started when I was about twelve or thirteen my mother would often drag me into all these fancy boutiques to try on dresses and hats and whatever would strike her fancy.

I could never stay in one place for longer than necessary so I wandered off until one day I found it-a little piece of silky paradise.

Almost every color under the sun that you could possibly imagine-women of all shapes and sizes were bounding in and out of the dressing room and behind the floral printed screens. I was instantly drawn to how the underwear enhanced the curves and masked the blemishes.

So many soft and silky bodies clothed in softer and silkier looking panties. Heh, probably wasn't wise to try and cop a feel but I swear the woman sent me total bedroom eyes-her lips a deep rouge color-naturally puckered-how was I to resist?

Anyway she beckoned me into the changing room and it was there that I-"

The sound of Ichigo suddenly elbowing the horn cut Grimmjow off.

"Stop! Just stop I don't want to hear details on how you lost your virginity Grimmjow, that's just weird!"

Tone coming out a little more defensive then he intended, "Would you chill out?! I didn't lose my virginity to her-that happened one winter when I was vacationing in the mountains but anyway we won't go there."

"Yes let's _not!_ I'm not sure how much more of these "stories" I can take."

"Calm down Ichigo there's no need to get upset."

"Yes! Yes there is a reason to get upset. Outta the blue you tell me that not only do you like the look of panties but that you _also _enjoy wearing em and then you without even giving me some time to process all the information you fire away with more "sexy-times" in your youth or whatever. If that's supposed to make me feel better its really not I'm telling you right now!"

Grimmjow raked a hand through his hair and let out a frustrated growl-shout, "I'm being honest, isn't that what you wanted?"

"Yes! Yes I want honesty. I love and appreciate your honesty Grimmjow but for a guy that is quote "so private" you don't even seem to arghhhhh-

Once more Ichigo took his frustration out on the horn. Followed up by a scream and-

"Never mind look if it will make you happy I'll-I'll agree to it."

"What are you saying Ichigo?"

Was it possible Ichigo was really agreeing to-

"I'm saying if you want me to watch and photograph you while you're modeling panties in front of a full length mirror than I'll do it. If you want me to model panties for you while you're masturbating I'll do it. Or if you want to dry hump while we're_ both_ wearing panties than I guess I can agree to do that too but only because I love you and can't give you what you _really _want just yet."

()()

TBC


	25. CHAPTER SEVENTEEN BERRY RAMBLES

**Disclaimer: BLEAAAAAAAAAAACH IS AWESOMENESS AND SO IS KUBO-SENSEI and apparently my originality for disclaimers has dwindled…sighs.**

Warnings: AU, OOC-ness, spelling, grammar, punctuation, run-ons, SLY-HUMOR, confu-ze-led berry boy.

_A/N I have no excuse for the lack of new chapter but well…happy intermission time I guess._

_~SLY~_

Thank you go out to: _**Hollow Ichigo-Ichigo, Narutopokefan, Castiel**_ for life! THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEWS!

_**()**_

_**PREVIOUSLY**_

"_I'm saying if you want me to watch and photograph you while you're modeling panties in front of a full length mirror than I'll do it. If you want me to model panties for you while you're masturbating I'll do it. Or if you want to dry hump while we're both wearing panties than I guess I can agree to do that too but only because I love you and can't give you what you really want just yet."_

_**(**_

_**)**_

_**DRUNKEN SEAHORSE**_

CHAPTER 17

_**THE INNER RAMBLINGS OF A MENTALLY EXHAUSTED BERRY!**_

_**Did I really just say all of that out loud? Am I really agreeing to playing out these weird panty fantasies of his? Is this a prank? Is it possible Grimmjow just said all this shit to get some sort of reaction out of me? **_

_**That would make a hell of a lot more sense actually. Yeah that must be it! The bastard! He's fucking with me because I won't let him **__**literally**__** fuck me. He doesn't really wear woman's panties and that story about him being seduced when he was a tween is a big fat lie-yeah that must be it!**_

_**Grimmjow wouldn't be caught dead in such a get up! Or even if he was it would only be if he lost his mind and couldn't remember anything and the chances of that happening are nil. What exactly is he trying to achieve by telling me all this? Is he trying to make me feel guilty but what do I have to feel guilty about?**_

_**I'm not the shameless manwhore! I'm not the one who lied and is STILL lying. But why out of all the random bullshit he could be spewing right now, why this? I need to know what's going on in that head of his.**_

_**I thought we understood each other with out words but he's said so much out of left field crap tonight that I just don't know what to make of half of it anymore. Is this really the same guy I've been obsessing over for years? **_

_**Is this really the same cocky half Canadian who blew into Karakura Town like Poseidon's storm?**_

_**Time changes a person I get that but to change to this degree? What else is he going to tell me? Can I honestly accept every part of Grimmjow? I mean I do love him but I don't know if I would be able to keep a straight face or for that matter a hard on if he came prancing into the bedroom wearing lacy panties?**_

_**Ha! Prancing! Him?! Sure I've joked/jibed that he's like a jungle cat-specifically a panther but prancing? Not likely! Anyway if Grimmjow is into this panty obsession thing what other bizarre things is this bastard into? Could it be…is he into-gah! I can't even finish the sentence in my own head.**_

_**He's always talked about holding me down and fucking me but has he ever been fucked? Does he expect me to fuck him? Did he ask Renji to fuck him or that asshole Grantz? **_

_**Grimmjow swore up and down that the three of them did nothing but fool around a bit here and there but what if he just said that to spare my feelings? **_

_**Did he…did he leave out some bits because he knows how I would react? No fucking way! It can't be! Grimmjow can't be a pillow biter? A screamer? Well there might be plenty of screams I doubt it would be in that way. But if he is…if there is some slight chance that he turns out to be more of a lazy lion than a-yeah not going there so not going to finish that train of thought either!**_

_**Gaahhhhh this is so damn irritating! As much as I want to shut these thoughts out of my head they keep coming. What if the real reason Grimmjow has messed around with girls and guys-what if a part of him feels like a woman? I can't believe I just thought that. Fuck! What is wrong with me? **_

_**What should it matter? At the end of it all he's still Grimmjow right? I mean everyone has there strange fetishes or desires or whatever right?**_

_**Right. Right it's just a fetish he's not a lamb in wolves skin he's still every bit the Alpha male he's always prided himself on being. **_

_**Maybe I'm getting it all wrong-maybe this panty thing is part of his upbringing. Is it natural for Canadians to go to lingerie boutiques with their mothers? Gah! What the fuck? Seriously why the hell am I trying to stereotype now…that has nothing to with. **_

_**Besides which can my thoughts come off any more asinine I mean really…what the fuck? I should be ashamed at myself. I don't know jack shit about Canada or Canadian upbringing or whatever.**_

_**I need to stop this is ridiculous. I'm starting to lose track of things.**_

_**Should I just come out and ask Grimmjow all of these questions? I could but something tells me it would blow up in my face especially since he's made it more than clear that he is quite sick to death of my questions.**_

_**I can't help it though! It's not my fault that my mind is racing like this. Should I talk to Shiro and Ulquiorra about this? The two of them are always going on and on about fun times and experimenting and outer appearances being deceiving and all that. What's that Shiro said? Something like 'the mild mannered tax attorney is actually a raging bull while the hot-tempered cage fighter is …NO! STOP! Seriously this is getting RIDICULOUS!**_

_**Even if Grimmjow has done or considered these um…types of things it's none of my business! Not really. At least not yet. We'll cross that road when we get there.**_

_**Yes that's right OUR road is just beginning.**_

_**()()**_

_**TBC**_

_**2 things: **_

_**1) Please check out my new one-shot split into 2 parts…White Reindeer and Reluctant Santa (found in SLY's WINTER BERRY COLLECTION**_

_**And 2)**_

_**LMAO…additional note on Ichi's intermission**_

_PS I blame this on all those authors/fans out there who are big into the whole "reversible" thing. Stop TRYING TO BRAINWASH ME! IT WON'T WORK. __**UKE!BERRYICHI FOREVER!**_

_**REAL CHAPTER NEXT TIME **_

_**THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT!**_

_**THANK YOU FOR READING!**_

_~SLY~_


End file.
